What should I expect different in the South?

[rszdtrvl]

I always feel like a misplaced Southerner. Born and bred in Washington state, I feel like I lived my most recent past lives (if you believe in that) in the south. My heart tells me I belong in Arkansas. Sounds kooky, but I just feel that way.
Maybe one day I will be able to visit and see if anything feels familiar. As I have gotten older the feelings seem to get stronger.

My family laughs at the Southern terms I use. Where I picked them up, I have no idea. I even have my 17yo son using the term "y'all" (and that is rarely heard around here).

 

[minkydog]

Y'all
Bless her heart

Food, everything is fried, or most everything...if that's to your liking, I guess it "Can't be beat" but not everyone likes "crawdads"

Born and bred in the South, by the grace of God. I like gumbo, but I have never eaten a crawdad iny life.

We here in the South enjoy eating many kinds of foods--Italian, Greek, Indian, Chinese, BBQ. Some of us like fried chicken, collard greens, buttermilk & corn bread, and 7-layer chocolate cake, too, but not every week.

Welcome to the South. Y'all come on down! If you can go with the flow and enjoy our genuine hospitality, you will like living here. If you decide to be a piss-ant, aggravated by the slower pace of talking and living, well, bless your heart.

BTW, the reason things are slower here is the dad-blame heat and humidity. It's just really hard to move fast when its 100 degrees and 85% humidity!

 

[minnie mum]

Please listen to this. We have many transplants around here and I am so tired of 'things were better where I used to live'. I hear this all of the time. It was not better, it was just different. I understand that you liked it better but that is just because it was your home. This is my home and I don't like to hear it criticised. And besides, you moved here. Unless you are forced to move against your will there must be a reason to like this place.

I agree completely. But this is just good manners. After all, you wouldn't come into someone's home and criticize it or the people who live there to their face, would you? Some things are best kept to yourself.

From my few years living in Alabama:

Life tends to go at a slower pace. Once you've lived through a southern summer, you'll understand and adjust.

Fat is its own food group. Every restaurant breakfast will come with grits. If you see red beans and rice on a menu, order it!

Your manners will define you. Get used to being called Ma'am or Sir. Learn to use these terms yourself.

Everything you've heard about southern hospitality is true.

Being called a Yankee is not a compliment. When some one says Bless Your Heart, it is a euphemism for something entirely different (but good manners forbid them from saying what they are really thinking)!

 

[bluezee]

Order a soda or a Coke. If you ask for a pop you'll get some pretty funny looks.

 

[JanaDee]

People talk to each other down here whether you know each other or not. If you are in the waiting room while you car is getting worked on, expect the other customers to start a conversation with you. If you are walking down the sidewalk, people will look you in the eye and smile or say hi. People will talk to you while shopping. It's very normal down here.

People do this in small-town Midwest, too.

OP, "bless your heart" is not a compliment. Don't ever take it as one.

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

I agree completely. But this is just good manners. After all, you wouldn't come into someone's home and criticize it or the people who live there to their face,

By similar logic, would you criticize a guest in your home to their face?

Being called a Yankee is not a compliment.

Then why is it ok for southerners to criticize others and where they are from, but not ok for others to return the favor?

 

[JanaDee]

I agree completely. But this is just good manners. After all, you wouldn't come into someone's home and criticize it or the people who live there to their face, would you? Some things are best kept to yourself.

From my few years living in Alabama:

Life tends to go at a slower pace. Once you've lived through a southern summer, you'll understand and adjust.

Fat is its own food group. Every restaurant breakfast will come with grits. If you see red beans and rice on a menu, order it!

Your manners will define you. Get used to being called Ma'am or Sir. Learn to use these terms yourself.

Everything you've heard about southern hospitality is true.

Being called a Yankee is not a compliment. When some one says Bless Your Heart, it is a euphemism for something entirely different (but good manners forbid them from saying what they are really thinking)!

If people had good manners to begin with, they wouldn't say "bless your heart".

 

[Shanan]

I agree with where are you moving to rural Alabama or Birmingham? I moved from rural Mississippi to East Texas. Both are South but both are definitely different. and yet there are things alike.
My friends kids call me Ms. Shanan
I LOVE sweet tea

 

[marmalade]

People talk to each other down here whether you know each other or not. If you are in the waiting room while you car is getting worked on, expect the other customers to start a conversation with you. If you are walking down the sidewalk, people will look you in the eye and smile or say hi. People will talk to you while shopping. It's very normal down here.

I live in WNY and we do that here too? I don't think that is just a southern thing.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

From what I understand, it's a totally different world. At least that's what I get from conversations here.

And eventually thing thread will turn into an argument about Southern manners. This always happens.

 

[NewRVLady]

OP- I hope you don't think FLORIDA is the Deep South



I live a few dozen miles from the Gulf - Deep South
Each Southern state is unique!

 

[madge]

big ol' bows & smocked dresses, if you have a daughter under the age of 6.
.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

I consider a lot of northern FL the deep south.

Anything below say Gainesville is just Florida...Totally different from anywhere else.

 

[rickybobby]

Possum tastes like chicken.

 

[WowLookAtThat]

Please, do NOT call grits cream of wheat. They are two different things and I found out the hard way.

People are friendly there and endearments appear to be normal. I was called "Honey" "Sugar" and "Darlin'". It was a bit of a shock but not unpleasant.

Don't bash the food. It's pretty good but I have noticed that some restaurants in the Atlanta district are serving traditional Southern cuisine with a new spin.

Be nice as possible.That is just anywhere really.

 

[morgan98]

They are fanatical about SEC football. I grew up in the Midwest and I understand liking football (Big 10). I also lived in South Bend for several years which was over the top about Notre Dame.

However, nothing prepared me for the SEC football obsession.

I still don't get it...hanging my head in shame.

 

[JennaDeeDooDah]

Being called a Yankee is not a compliment. When some one says Bless Your Heart, it is a euphemism for something entirely different (but good manners forbid them from saying what they are really thinking)!

If I may, I'd like to address the first part. I have never referred to anyone as a yankee in a negative way. To me, a yankee is a person from up north, but not all areas up north. It's just another way to describe someone just like "southerner", "New Englander", etc. I rarely hear it as an insult. As to the second part...

If people had good manners to begin with, they wouldn't say "bless your heart".

I know that there are times when people say "Bless your heart" and actually mean "stick it in your ear"; however, there are many many times that they are being sincere. Often times, I hear it (and say it) in place of something like "poor thing" or the like. In those situations, which, again, I hear more often than the other, it is not used as an insult.

I live in WNY and we do that here too? I don't think that is just a southern thing.

It's done in various places. But there are also places where some people don't even make eye contact when walking down the street and have heard that some see it as a challenge of sorts. Since I don't know where the OP is from, I thought I'd point that out just in case she wasn't used to it and might think it odd or even threatening in some way.

 

[minkydog]

Being called a Yankee is not a compliment. When some one says Bless Your Heart, it is a euphemism for something entirely different (but good manners forbid them from saying what they are really thinking)!

Being called a Yankee in and of itself is not derogatory; neither is Bless your heart. Yankee just denotes that you're from the North. DamYankee, on the other hand, means you come from the North and have a certain attitude. DamYankee would not be used in conversation, generally. It might be considered a sort of character slur.

Bless your heart can be a genuine expression of concern. It's all in the situation. Your baby is in the hospital, you just lost your job, your dog just died, you just moved down here and miss your mom, bless your heart would be used to convey sympathy and might be followed by a tuna casserole and Coca-Cola cake on your doorstep. You're being an obnoxious butt and bless your heart might be used to convey formal irritation. See: Damyankee.

Most southerners have the good manners not to purposefully shame or ridicule someone, if they have any breeding whatsoever. That is my 58 years of experience.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

They are fanatical about SEC football. I grew up in the Midwest and I understand liking football (Big 10). I also lived in South Bend for several years which was over the top about Notre Dame.

However, nothing prepared me for the SEC football obsession.

I still don't get it...hanging my head in shame.

Many of the states in the SEC don't have any pro sports. In MO, we have the Cardinals, Royals, Chiefs, Rams, and Blues if you're not interested in Mizzou. OTOh, AL (for example) has 'bama & Auburn. Period.

 

[deserrai]

OP- I hope you don't think FLORIDA is the Deep South



I live a few dozen miles from the Gulf - Deep South
Each Southern state is unique!

North Florida is the Deep South. Central and South Florida are not.