Boorish behavior

[dcassetta]

My guess is that some can afford it more easily than others. When it's harder on your budget, the pressure to make it a success is greater because you won't necessarily be able to come back soon.

It's like people in the parks who are determined to "have fun" although the family is clearly miserable and all the kids really want to do is go back to the hotel and swim. But, passes are so expensive people feel compelled to spend all day in the parks.

 

[MomOTwins]

I have one -- we were the first to board our (eventually completely full) DCL bus to port and all sat together. At the end, the last family to board (family of 3) boards to find there are not 3 seats in the same row; only two seats in the row behind us, plus one seat several rows back. The wife and son sit in the row behind my husband, but the man insists that my toddler needs to be sitting in my husband lap instead of his own seat so the man can be just one row away from the rest of his family. He makes a huge scene when we won't give up our toddler's seat. Our toddler is not little, so lap sitting is not really an option for him anymore, plus he was napping, and moving him would wake him up. I just don't understand it -- he's an adult and he thinks it is more important he have the seat of his choosing (when he was the last person to show up for the scheduled bus from the resort) than to allow a little boy to sit comfortably.

 

[mevelandry]

It's like people in the parks who are determined to "have fun" although the family is clearly miserable and all the kids really want to do is go back to the hotel and swim. But, passes are so expensive people feel compelled to spend all day in the parks.

So true!

Now, if we know we are going to spend less than 6 hours in a park, we don't even bother buy tickets. We just plan something else.

 

[dvcdisney]

My guess is that some can afford it more easily than others. When it's harder on your budget, the pressure to make it a success is greater because you won't necessarily be able to come back soon.

That being said, there are rich people who act like jerks and act like they are entitled.

I can understand the pressure to have a good vacation. We're all here to get the information we need to help make our vacations successful. But, as you implied and I agree, being able to afford or not afford the cruise has nothing to do with how someone behaves. There are jerks in all socioeconomic status.

It's easier for these people to take it out on others than to accept their own faults. So, I still believe that no matter what pressure someone is under, it takes a rude person to be rude all the time...the stress just allows the belligerence to come out more freely. You'll never see these people apologize for anything. I think if it was not their normal nature to be rude, it's only natural to apologize when they did something wrong.

 

[dvcdisney]

I have one -- we were the first to board our (eventually completely full) DCL bus to port and all sat together. At the end, the last family to board (family of 3) boards to find there are not 3 seats in the same row; only two seats in the row behind us, plus one seat several rows back. The wife and son sit in the row behind my husband, but the man insists that my toddler needs to be sitting in my husband lap instead of his own seat so the man can be just one row away from the rest of his family. He makes a huge scene when we won't give up our toddler's seat. Our toddler is not little, so lap sitting is not really an option for him anymore, plus he was napping, and moving him would wake him up. I just don't understand it -- he's an adult and he thinks it is more important he have the seat of his choosing (when he was the last person to show up for the scheduled bus from the resort) than to allow a little boy to sit comfortably.

I don't even know what to say about what that man did. Regardless of how old your son is, he had no right to tell your husband to put your son on his lap. That man is an adult, he can sit where there's an empty seat. I wouldn't even think of asking someone to do that. In all likelihood, you paid for your son's seat.

 

[Dug720]

I don't even know what to say about what that man did. Regardless of how old your son is, he had no right to tell your husband to put your son on his lap. That man is an adult, he can sit where there's an empty seat. I wouldn't even think of asking someone to do that. In all likelihood, you paid for your son's seat.

Actually that is a valid point. If the child was a true toddler (and therefore under 3), then the child would NOT have been charged and would indeed have been expected by DCL to be a lap child. If the child is over 3 you would have been charged OR if you wanted the child to have a seat, then you should have paid for a seat for the child.

 

[mevelandry]

Actually that is a valid point. If the child was a true toddler (and therefore under 3), then the child would NOT have been charged and would indeed have been expected by DCL to be a lap child. If the child is over 3 you would have been charged OR if you wanted the child to have a seat, then you should have paid for a seat for the child.

Even if they did not pay for the seat... How bad is it to sit a little further from your family for an hour long ride?

 

[tinkerone]

Actually that is a valid point. If the child was a true toddler (and therefore under 3), then the child would NOT have been charged and would indeed have been expected by DCL to be a lap child. If the child is over 3 you would have been charged OR if you wanted the child to have a seat, then you should have paid for a seat for the child.

But doesn't that go back to the issue of letting DCL make the decision and not have the general public police situations? I can see the man asking politely than moving on however being instant is on another level. He could have/should have talked to the driver if he felt it was wrong. That would have corrected any situation right there. Other than that, does he have the right to question it?
I will say I have no opinion on this, just playing devils advocate.

 

[Dug720]

Even if they did not pay for the seat... How bad is it to sit a little further from your family for an hour long ride?

But doesn't that go back to the issue of letting DCL make the decision and not have the general public police situations? I can see the man asking politely than moving on however being instant is on another level. He could have/should have talked to the driver if he felt it was wrong. That would have corrected any situation right there. Other than that, does he have the right to question it?
I will say I have no opinion on this, just playing devils advocate.

While they should have monitored it when they assigned the busses to the resorts. If there had been a solo cruiser at one of the resorts on that particular bus, there would have appeared to NOT have been a seat and then there would have been an issue. And you know that you did not pay for the kid to have a seat. In actuality, the kid should never have been in a seat until the bus was finished loading and you knew there WAS in fact an empty seat.

DCL assigns the buses based on the numbers they know they have. They would have known that there was an under-three who should not have had a seat.

Bottom line, if you want to guarantee your toddler has a seat that is NOT your lap, you need to tell DCL when you make the reservations and pay for the child to have a seat. Otherwise expect to be holding the kid on your lap.

 

[jdb in AZ]

But there was a seat available for the man -- he just wanted one closer to his family.

 

[Dug720]

But there was a seat available for the man -- he just wanted one closer to his family.

In this case, yes. But the bottom line is the kid should not have been in a seat unless the parents when booking the DCL transfers said "I know kid is under 3, but we want to pay for a seat because he is too big for our laps."

 

[YawningDodo]

While these stories disappoint me, I am not surprised. People that exhibit poor behavior at work or at home aren't likely to change their spots on vacation. Unfortunately, when we walk away and/or don't tell someone, we reinforce the behavior. I'm not saying anyone should continue the confrontation, but I've found that with Disney if you summon a cast member, they usually do a pretty good job of sorting things out. Of course, I've also seen CMs become the victim of some pretty harsh confrontations, so that doesn't always help, but it does help clarify who the troublemakers are.

I've run across these people a few times. The queue of Casey Jr.s train at Disneyland, the queue for Splash Mountain on Mother's Day, waiting for the Pirate show on the Wonder and hunting for tables in Cabanas. Conflict is initiated when one party feels they are being victimized in some way or they are already behaving badly and don't want it pointed out. It's hard to know what drives the behavior.

Over the years I've observed there are three things that people will defend vigorously. 1) Their family (kids), 2) Their money and 3) their time. Any perceived threat or challenge to any of those three and there is a potential for an issue. Disney Security has a reputation for handling unruly guests quickly, which is often enough to discourage poor behavior.

As for spray sunscreen. I love the stuff. I used it on the balcony of my cabin before ever leaving the ship. It's usually most effective when applied prior to sun exposure. When it comes time to reapply, I try and find someplace away from everyone else and I pay attention to the wind. That isn't always possible if you are dealing with multiple kids all in different situations, but there is no excuse for becoming aggressive if you accidentally allow some to blow onto others.

I heartily agree--I hope it's not too out of place to share a Disneyland story rather than a DCL one, but others have done, so....

On the trip I took with my housemate last fall, late in our stay we were in line for the Indiana Jones ride one evening. The standby line was at more than an hour and a half. If you've ridden it, remember the part of the queue that runs parallel to the exit hallway? Well, as we were making our way up that part of the queue, we saw a group of three go jogging up the exit hallway...and when they reached the point where the queue and exit part ways, they ducked under the barrier literally right in front of us. We ended up listening to them loudly congratulating each other for several long, loooong minutes because we were afraid to confront them directly and potentially start a row before we came to a part of the queue where a CM happened to be assisting another group, flagged her down and waited for her to finish what she was doing, then told her what had happened (her immediate response was an "Oh, really?" that made it pretty clear she wasn't going to let that fly). She let us know she'd handle it and disappeared off to wherever CMs disappear off to, and we spent another fifteen or twenty minutes in line behind these people before we reached an area with a CM access point on one side. A different CM was there and called out for a "group of three" like she was requesting a group to fill a spot at just exactly the right moment to snag the group, got them out of the main queue, and then told them they were being kicked out of line because "we saw you cut in line." And I mean she made it sound like the CMs had seen it, without implicating us at all.

It was all handled very, very smoothly. I'd guess that they probably went to check the security videos to verify our story (as they should), plus the method for removing the group from the line was shockingly effective at preventing any kind of scene. As people who are very conflict-averse we were hesitant at first to even tell anyone what had happened, but I'm so glad we did. I hate to think if they'd gotten to ride the ride and had learned that they could get away with that kind of behavior.

Edit: What I was going to add, though, and forgot: this was literally the only time we saw someone behaving really badly in Disneyland throughout the entire week we were there. There may have been a few moments of people being cranky or whatever, but this was the one and only time we saw anyone deliberately do something against the rules or against general etiquette.

 

[Lilsia]

In this case, yes. But the bottom line is the kid should not have been in a seat unless the parents when booking the DCL transfers said "I know kid is under 3, but we want to pay for a seat because he is too big for our laps."

Does Disney actually come out and say that the child is not assigned a seat? They ask how many people, including young ones. I would assume that many of these would be sitting in their own seat, especially over the age of 1. It sounds like they had just the right amount of seats with the child occupying one. I always take the Disney bus to and from the cruise and I have seen plenty of toddlers in their own seats. I think they account for them when filling the buses.

 

[Dug720]

Does Disney actually come out and say that the child is not assigned a seat? They ask how many people, including young ones. I would assume that many of these would be sitting in their own seat, especially over the age of 1. It sounds like they had just the right amount of seats with the child occupying one. I always take the Disney bus to and from the cruise and I have seen plenty of toddlers in their own seats. I think they account for them when filling the buses.

I have no kids, so I don't know. But if I did and wanted the under-3 kid to have a seat I would tell them that and expect to be charged. If I was not charged, I would not presume to put the kid in a seat.

 

[jdb in AZ]

Kids under 3 get into the Disney parks for free and aren't expected to lap sit on rides. Can't help thinking DCL handles kids on buses similar to the parks, instead of the way airlines do it.

 

[Lilsia]

I have no kids, so I don't know. But if I did and wanted the under-3 kid to have a seat I would tell them that and expect to be charged. If I was not charged, I would not presume to put the kid in a seat.

Well when you make the reservation they ask how many and they also ask about children under 3. They never mention it as a "lap child" like some places will. They just say OK, they are free if under 3. To me that means that they will have a seat but not have to pay. Just like your child does not pay at the buffet, that does not mean they have to stand while everyone is at a table. If they are strictly to be a lap child, like on a plane, that is usually made very clear by either the airline/bus, etc. I don't ever remember Disney saying this. Has anyone had that experience that Disney has said the child needed to be on your lap for the bus ride?

 

[cadien]

The ugly confrontation on my recent cruise was a family saving the middle half (14 seats) of a row in the movie theater and one guy called their bluff. Both sides were being aggressive and what really bothered me was that a child was in the middle of all the back and forth. The oldest of the seat savers eventually stomped off, possibly to complain. Despite all the reminders of not saving seats.

Most of them remained empty. A lot of the group never showed. It was just in case.

 

[cadien]

I'm jealous of anyone who has a bathing suit covering most of their body. Right now I'm just wearing UV t-shirts and shorts but I'm shoping for something that would cover me more.

https://www.uvskinz.com/

 

[cyclenut]

Yeah... In my experience working in a hotel, the people for whom money is no issue are more likely to play the entitled "Do you know who I am?????" card. Those who scrimp and save are the "I paid this much money, I will do what I want" kind who also expect perfection which is never going to happen. Especially when traveling.

You got me thinking a bit about the cost of something relative to expectations. I know in the service industry higher cost is often equal to higher quality. At least that is the expectation I have in my mind ... and I don't think I'm alone in that. When service at DCL is not as good as I would have expected, I do think that I paid a lot of "extra" for DCL because I want that extra level of service. When I don't get it, I do think that how much I pad is a factor. When I check into a Holiday Inn, I expect good service, but when I check into a Ritz Carlton, I expect excellent service. When I book a really cheap cruise, I don't expect the same experience as when I book a DCL cruise.

This scenario of expectations is one of the things that can drive people to act entitled. We all get this vision in our heads of what our vacation is supposed to be and sometimes we set the bar too high. If the vacation experience you receive drops below a certain point, you start to feel as though the value of that vacation is being affected. When that happens, some will start to fight to claw back some of that lost value and they won't limit that fight to employees/cast/crew. They will take their fight to fellow guests and sometimes even family members. Anyone they think is "ruining" their vacation.

So ... yes ... "I pad this much money, I will do what I want" start to rear it's ugly head.

 

[dvcdisney]

You got me thinking a bit about the cost of something relative to expectations. I know in the service industry higher cost is often equal to higher quality. At least that is the expectation I have in my mind ... and I don't think I'm alone in that. When service at DCL is not as good as I would have expected, I do think that I paid a lot of "extra" for DCL because I want that extra level of service. When I don't get it, I do think that how much I pad is a factor. When I check into a Holiday Inn, I expect good service, but when I check into a Ritz Carlton, I expect excellent service. When I book a really cheap cruise, I don't expect the same experience as when I book a DCL cruise.

This scenario of expectations is one of the things that can drive people to act entitled. We all get this vision in our heads of what our vacation is supposed to be and sometimes we set the bar too high. If the vacation experience you receive drops below a certain point, you start to feel as though the value of that vacation is being affected. When that happens, some will start to fight to claw back some of that lost value and they won't limit that fight to employees/cast/crew. They will take their fight to fellow guests and sometimes even family members. Anyone they think is "ruining" their vacation.

So ... yes ... "I pad this much money, I will do what I want" start to rear it's ugly head.

I agree completely....but some of us also feel we paid a lot and we don't always get what we expect...does that excuse or even give reason for such behaviour?

I don't think so...I still think that circumstances may affect the behaviour, but the person behaves the way he/she does because they are that kind of person...a jerk.