Mother of the groom dress advice

:flower3: Not sure if this will be of much comfort, but as the stepmother of 2, the implied instructions have always been "pay up, shut up and show up." That's exactly what I've done both times. For the first one I did wear beige and for the most recent wedding last October, which was an "Autumn Splendor" theme, the dress colour I was assigned was orange. Yes, orange (SMH). I actually found a nice one on-line at Macy's.

Oh my, so sorry. I hope orange is at least flattering to you? It is my least favorite color (except in nature—fine for leaves and pumpkins) and as a very fair skinned blue eyed blonde, I look hideous in it. I would so want to be cooperative, but not sure I could actually wear orange for a special occasion like that. I hesitated about buying the house we live in because the school colors here are black and orange. My kids sports uniforms are often orange with black writing, sometimes the reverse. Ugh!
 
Op: not unheard of and actually common in my experience with color schemes etc.

Gold/beige can be a beautiful choice. So many styles and so many tones. Best of luck and congrats to the couple!!
 


Never heard that the MOG is supposed to wear beige.

Me either, I actually was thinking it may be off-limits as to be too close to a bride's gown especially if off-white. So I googled it and this is from Emily Post " ... old concept that both moms are supposed to look matronly was retired long ago, along with the colorless advice that the mother of the groom should wear beige ..."

AND

ZERO reference that brides can command the color worn.
 
Oh my, so sorry. I hope orange is at least flattering to you? It is my least favorite color (except in nature—fine for leaves and pumpkins) and as a very fair skinned blue eyed blonde, I look hideous in it. I would so want to be cooperative, but not sure I could actually wear orange for a special occasion like that. I hesitated about buying the house we live in because the school colors here are black and orange. My kids sports uniforms are often orange with black writing, sometimes the reverse. Ugh!
:teeth: It was fine; I'm a "winter" colour-wise and I chose a very clear orange that worked well with my dark hair and green eyes. The dress itself was pretty with nice details (it was a lot longer on me than the model in the picture - it just skimmed the top of my knees).
tahari-BRIGHT-RED-V-neck-Embroidered-hem-Cape-Dress.jpeg
 
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Have already decided if she pulls that for our kids, we will have her photoshopped into a black dress.
Not wedding, but years ago the company i worked for took us all outside for a group photo for their catalog (and, ultimately, our Christmas gift - but that's a story for another time ;)).

Managers stood in a semi-circle, with the owners in the center and all of us peons behind. Owner wore a bright red dress, as did the manager on one end.

When the catalog came out, the manager's dress was purple.
 
My mother and my mother-in-law ended up buying the same dress to wear. My mom is short so hers was the Petite version and the neckline details were different. My colors were navy and hot pink/fuchsia. I let my sister pick whether to wear pink or navy (she picked Navy - she was my only bridesmaid/maid of honor) and didn't direct the colors for the moms but both obviously had the same thought and chose cobalt blue. I thought it was cute. When my mother in law showed me her dress I instantly recognized it as the same one my mom had picked. I laughed and told her so and she instantly offered to return it. I told her not bother and later heard from my mom that she also called my mom to check if she was okay with it. My mom joked that they were my bridesmaids since they matched. Looked great in the photos too!
 
Another New Yorker here and its pretty common for the mothers to check with the bride on what colors they should wear so as not to clash with the bridal party or color themes of the wedding. The parents of the bride and groom are essentially a part of the wedding party as well, and will be in many photos throughout the day and evening. It doesn't mean the bride is always a bridezilla or controlling or whatever else may come to mind. Every wedding and couple is different.

Sorry if its been mentioned, but David's Bridal has a selection of "mother of the bride" dresses which work just as well for mother of the groom. If the bride and bridesmaids are getting their dresses there, they sometimes have deals. Personally, I don't think gold or beige sounds that bad. I'd prefer that over a distinct color that would be difficult to pair with shoes or jewelry, and could still potentially clash with other colors if the right shade isn't chosen.
 
That’s funny. My MIL wore black too.

It’s funny because my mil didn’t wear black. Said it was bad luck to wear black to a wedding as a mom of the bride or groom. But I feel like black is classic and looks good on everyone. However she lied to my face and said she wanted to wear navy blue but wore purple. And wanted her husband to match her. We said no.
 
I started my shopping in person at Nordstrom and Macy’s, I was interested in Adrianna Papell dresses, both stores have a lot. I figured out the size and color I liked in person after trying on her line, then I started my shopping on line. Funny, I am NOT an on line shopper. I ordered on line Adrianna Papell dress from Macy’s, loved it, color not right, returned it in store to Macy’s. Then ordered Adrianna Papell dresses on line, one from Macys, one from Nordstrom, used a coupon from Macys. Anyway, now was the dilemma which one do I choose? Got them both in February for a August wedding. Kept tags, receipts all on and contemplated which one I liked better. DH and DIL to be liked both, wanted to surprise my son. Three months before wedding, decided on one from Nordstrom and got refund on my Macy’s card from Macy’s. Only thing on both dresses was it had to be shortened, I am tall and Adrianna Papell was still long. Opened up a Nordstrom charge, got a $40 Nordstrom note for opening up Nordstrom charge and when u have Nordstrom charge, you get $100 back in Nordstrom note from alterations. The shortening of the dress cost $100, dress was beaded, a lot of work involved. THEN when I brought dress backfor alterations about 7 weeks before wedding, price had dropped by about $75, as I noticed the same dress on a clearance rack. The clerk gladly made the price adjustment to my dress. Prefer to order on line as the dresses in store I tried on by customers and dragged through dressing rooms. Nordstrom alterations did an EXCEPTIONAL job on the alterations, was PERFECT! I was so pleased I wrote an email to the store manager as to the great work done by the seamstress! Don’t order on line directly from Adrianna Papell if you are considering her line of dresses, takes an USUALLY LONG time once they receive it back to credit your credit card! I ordered a clutch purse that wasn’t the right color and waited forever. Thankfully, it wasn’t an expensive dress that I was waiting for a credit to my credit card. As for color, I asked the Mother of the Bride her choice, then I chose a color complimentary to her dress and the wedding party! Can’t say enough compliments about the selection and service at Nordstrom evening dress collection! Happy planning, EXCITING,it is FUN but different making the final decision!:cheer2::woohoo:
 
DS is getting married in May. Bridesmaids are wearing a light pink. Future DILs mother is deceased. When I asked FDIL what color, she said whatever color I want. Now I have to find a dress that doesn’t look like I’m trying to look too young or like a great grandmother. But at least I can wear whatever color I choose. I’m thinking something that will coordinate with bridesmaids but not be matchy matchy.
 
Are both mothers wearing beige??

I was initially told I would be wearing an off the shoulder orange dress chosen by the DIL and her mom.
Because of my peculiar size and shape, I politely declined and waited until after bride's mom chose her color then ordered up dresses from Nordstrom, picked the best fit and returned the rest (free shipping both directions).

Good luck OP!
 
It’s funny because my mil didn’t wear black. Said it was bad luck to wear black to a wedding as a mom of the bride or groom. But I feel like black is classic and looks good on everyone. However she lied to my face and said she wanted to wear navy blue but wore purple. And wanted her husband to match her. We said no.
My MIL wore it BECAUSE it was bad luck.

Keep in mind this wasn't a new dress that she bought for the wedding. This was one she pulled out of her closet that morning.
 
My MIL wore it BECAUSE it was bad luck.

Keep in mind this wasn't a new dress that she bought for the wedding. This was one she pulled out of her closet that morning.
OMG! We have similar MILs. Mine wore white. She told me it was off white, but her suit dress was as white as mine. At the end of the reception, she shrugged and said, "I guess we have to share him now." lol

After 10 years of being married to her son, we finally started to get along. I guess she figured that I wasn't going anywhere. It'll be 25 years for us in April. :love:
 
:teeth: It was fine; I'm a "winter" colour-wise and I chose a very clear orange that worked well with my dark hair and green eyes. The dress itself was pretty with nice details (it was a lot longer on me than the model in the picture - it just skimmed the top of my knees).
tahari-BRIGHT-RED-V-neck-Embroidered-hem-Cape-Dress.jpeg

I really like the dress and with the coloring you described I am sure you looked lovely and very “autumnal”. Kudos to you for making it all work. I am sure your stepdaughter was most appreciative.
 
Are both mothers wearing beige??

I was initially told I would be wearing an off the shoulder orange dress chosen by the DIL and her mom.
Because of my peculiar size and shape, I politely declined and waited until after bride's mom chose her color then ordered up dresses from Nordstrom, picked the best fit and returned the rest (free shipping both directions).

Good luck OP!

:faint: No words.

So happy to hear how you handled it.

SO SO dread this whole experience .... and one is likely to be sooner than later. Ongoing finger crosses she sticks to her lifelong plan of small and simple.


Look how cute in their matching dresses!

Looks great and how lucky you are for two Moms so easy going and respectful of each other. I had a GREAT MIL, and her and my Mom became friends. My kids were shocked when they found out at school that all grandparents aren't friends.
 
OMG! We have similar MILs. Mine wore white. She told me it was off white, but her suit dress was as white as mine. At the end of the reception, she shrugged and said, "I guess we have to share him now." lol

After 10 years of being married to her son, we finally started to get along. I guess she figured that I wasn't going anywhere. It'll be 25 years for us in April. :love:

Ewwwwww.
 

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