Another relationship question

[amberpi]

Have any of you had a successful relationship with someone with different political views? Not civil rights views, just politics. Have you ever had a relationship that couldn't overcome political differences?

ETA: shared religious views

Additional ETA: we agree on the current administration

 

[BadgerGirl84]

Yes. The relationship didn't work. We dated after I finished college for 2 years or so, and politics was part of the reason for our breakup--but I'd say it was just an overall issue of not being compatible. My husband and I have very similar political views (and we have the same religion which also plays a large role in our lives) and we often say how grateful we are we didn't marry past boyfriend or girlfriends who had such drastically different political views than ours. My husband and I greatly enjoy discussing the days events, making each other laugh by texting political memes and listening/watching certain radio or tv shows together. I'm sure many people can make it work, especially if they aren't that "into" politics, but it would not work for me to date or be married to someone on the opposite end of the political spectrum.

 

[stsomewhere]

My husband and I have different political views. We have been together 28 years. We know what topics push each other buttons and tend to stay away from them. We each voted for a different presidential candidate.

 

[msjprincess]

My husband and I belong to different political parties, never vote the same. We just avoid talking politics with each other. We've been together for 19 years.

 

[Hikergirl]

Through the years dh and I have moved farther apart on the political spectrum. We aren't complete opposites, there is much we agree on, but there is much we don't. I don't bring up politics with him and when he does I avoid talking about it.
I wanted to add that I don't ever tell dh who I vote for, I let him assume what he wants about it.

 

[smiths02]

My DH and I started off with very different political views, but we have moved closer to the same views. It is mostly my views that have changed. We were able to get along before even when we were at very opposite ends of the spectrum.

 

[cedricandsophie]

I’ve been lucky it hasn’t happened. And my husband just said a few weeks ago...if we didn’t agree on the current administration I doubt if we could live together. I agreed. I think the current political divisions make it harder than ever. I applaud couples that can do it. Even my husband who agrees with me get tired of my morning rants.

 

[dish rag]

Have any of you had a successful relationship with someone with different political views? Not civil rights views, just politics. Have you ever had a relationship that couldn't overcome political differences?

ETA: shared religious views

My wife and I are polar opposites politically. We are as close as any couple could be and have never had an argument or even come close ever, about any thing. We respect the others thoughts and opinions. If any thing our political differences make us laugh and have a good time.

 

[lorimay]

We did for the first 20 years of marriage, but now we have been on the same page for the last 11 years......

 

[mi*vida*loca]

My XH is a different political party than I am. We didn't talk about politics much when we were married (married from 20-28/separated at 26) so I won't say that was the reason we got divorced. I will say that we view life completely different and it boils down to why we are so different politically.

Now that we're older he's very into politics. If he could afford to he would probably run for local office. Sometimes he texts me (we're still friendly) and want to debate something. We "debate" respectfully but I know there's no way I could have stayed with him because he's so deeply into it now. If we were still married this past election would have divorced us no question about it. lol

 

[soccerdad72]

Neither my wife or I are that much into politics. Our beliefs happen to be somewhat similar, but even if they weren't, I can't imagine it would be something that would factor into our relationship.

 

[gillep]

My SIL has been with someone who has the opposite political affiliation and views as her for many years, and is marrying him this October, they just avoid talking about it. I, personally, could not do it, knowing my personality. Both DH and I really like to discuss and debate the things going on in the world around us, and although we don't always agree, and we learn a lot by listening to one another when we do disagree, we are much more similar than we are different, I wouldn't be ok just avoiding all political talk with my husband.

 

[RedAngie]

No. It would be a deal breaker.

 

[msjprincess]

I have to add though that these days it might make a difference if I was just meeting someone. The divide between sides is much bigger than it was when DH and I started dating.

 

[Mizzoufan]

I don't think I could do it.

 

[lovesmurfs]

My husband and I have different political views. We have been together 28 years. We know what topics push each other buttons and tend to stay away from them. We each voted for a different presidential candidate.

DH and I have been married nearly 28 years as well, and have nearly polar opposite political views. A lot of stuff we just don't bring up, although sometimes it's really difficult not to.

 

[cabanafrau]

My husband and I share similar values and the same faith. We also share an affinity to think of issues independently and don't fit easily into any single political ideology or party affiliation. Some issues we agree on, some issues we don't agree on. We can talk about our disagreements, even passionately. Has no impact on our relationship.

It's also not uncommon for one or both of us to be out of alignment with the thinking of various friends or family. Sometimes they may be aware one or both of us disagrees, sometimes they have zero idea. Unless they are the type of person who tries to impose their views on us or would hold some kind of extreme view that violates our core values our different opinions won't affect a thing.

 

[disykat]

We've been married 27 years. He gets more conservative and I get more liberal as we age.

When you first meet, you bond on things you have in common. However, if you do not love the person enough to commit to dealing with pretty much whatever changes life brings, I'd say don't marry them! Obviously everyone has deal breakers, but many political differences are essentially differences of opinions - something you will deal with constantly throughout marriage. I try to look at the basic goals of my husband's beliefs. We find commonalities at the crux of our beliefs even though we vote differently sometimes.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Have any of you had a successful relationship with someone with different political views? Not civil rights views, just politics. Have you ever had a relationship that couldn't overcome political differences?

ETA: shared religious views

Additional ETA: we agree on the current administration

With me I have to be with someone who shares my beliefs. It is just who I am.

That being said, it does NOT mean we can talk about shared political beliefs it in this day and age.

 

[BrianL]

I'd say it depends on how "into it" they are. It's one thing to have some different beliefs. It's another when someone is always talking about them, wanting to "debate," and not accepting of opposing viewpoints. That would cause a problem.