Ashamed to go to Disney without kids

DH and I don't have children, with no plans for any in the foreseeable future. And the couple times we've gone in extended groups with kids, I admit, I prefer traveling with adults. That being said, on our recent visits, I can't help but feel immense guilt for going without any children in tow. It feels selfish in a way, or maybe just immature? To clarify, I do NOT judge other adults visiting and enjoying their vacation, these feelings are all pointed inward and I don't know how to deal with them. Disney is our happy place and is a huge part of our lives, I don't want to stop going. We still take other 'adult' vacations, so it's not like it's because the parks are getting stale.

Does anyone else here battle with this conflict of emotions? It's difficult when I don't like to do the sorts of things most other adults at the parks seem to love like drinking or the scarier rides, and instead I'm waiting in line to meet Princess Elena with a crowd of toddlers.

I don't know how to get past this and it makes me so sad. I've talked to DH about it, but like I said, we don't want to stop going so we still go and I just deal with feeling stupid and guilty the whole time.
It sounds like you have a good start on the solution to your problem - "we still go and I just deal with feeling stupid and guilty the whole time". At least you're still going and not denying yourself the joy that it gives you! I suggest some positive affirmations to rewrite these terrible thoughts that occur to you. In other words, every time you have a thought like, "This is selfish," then think "but I deserve to spoil myself sometimes." If you think, "This is stupid," then think "maybe to other stodgy adults in the world, but I am still a kid at heart and I know what fun is!"

I know, it sounds like psycho babble, but it really does seem to help me (with lots of things that prey on my mind, not necessarily Disney.) Give yourself the gift of dedicating at least as much time to "feel good" thoughts as you do to the "bad feeling" thoughts. I found that some of mine stopped being so automatic pretty quickly; others have hung on. Whatever! I just keep going.
 
I love my children but I’ll be honest, going to Disney without them was amazing. 😊 I didn’t have to worry about strollers, packing snacks, mid day naps or hotel breaks, diaper bags, and walking through the bag check line. I could go at my own pace and do the things I wanted to do.
 
My second paragraph largely says I have overcome this. I'm just saying where I once was and how I can understand where some people might be coming from. I was hoping to shed light on those feelings so that you and others could have a better understanding. I'm also sharing so others know they aren't alone and encouraging them to do what they want to do to fully enjoy the parks.

I made my own MVMCP character autograph book using some $1 sticker books (thanks Dollar General & Party City), posterboard, and a small sketchbook. It very simplistic and probably looks like a kid slapped it together, but I almost feel that's kind of the point XD (I've also since gotten the castle sticker I needed so need to update). I have both Flynn Rider and Han Solo Disneybounds I'm going to wear on my upcoming trip. Trust me, I've dealt with those feelings.
That's a good attitude to have. And youre right, there are others who feel the same way you do so perhaps your posts will help.

So cute that you made your own autograph book. I did that with my son for his first trip. It was fun to do (and much cheaper! lol).

I love my children but I’ll be honest, going to Disney without them was amazing. 😊 I didn’t have to worry about strollers, packing snacks, mid day naps or hotel breaks, diaper bags, and walking through the bag check line. I could go at my own pace and do the things I wanted to do.
Lol. I can relate. Its the best experience ever going without kids. You do whatever you want. Im totally addicted now. ;)
 


@DisneyCraig523 I can't wait to do a kid free trip to WDW. Don't get me wrong, the trip with her was fun and the next one will be fun, but there's so much more flexibility when it's just adults.

I feel roughly 2% guilty that I’m there without them but then I get over it as I’m sipping on a Dole Whip or eating a turkey leg. Haha.
 
I am 37 and I go to the parks all the time. I also do not have children. I just don’t care what others think. I love going solo as well. It allows me to go at my own pace and not worry about conforming to the schedules of others. I even got pics with characters. Walt’s wanted kids and adults alike to enjoy his parks.
 


There are people out there, some on this Board honestly, who think those without children don't 'belong' if you will at Disney. They often state Disney is for the children when in reality Walt created DL (and now we have all the other parks out there) for everyone.

I've actually seen people say on the DIS that they'll stop going to Disney when their children reach an arbitrary age because they no longer need to go there since they believe it's only for children of some arbitrary age.
How sad that they've decided in advance against a wonderful vacation experience.

We do have children, however they are all adults in their 20's now with no children of their own yet, and I can't tell you how much fun we have on our "adults only" trips! We just got back from one in the beginning of October with my eldest, her DH, and some of his family, also all adults. And we did the Halloween party together!

We've done our adult trips with ADR's at O'hana with Lilo and Stitch, Tusker House with the characters, Hiro and Baymax M&G in HS when they were first there, and we have no regrets. We work hard for our money and free time and can decide how and where we want to spend it on vacation.

DH and I have celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary, our 29th wedding anniversary and just last month our 30th wedding anniversary in WDW. It is really special for us to do the parks as adults and enjoy our time there together. We've gone by ourselves to WDW 3 times in the past year! It's very different to be able to experience WDW as an adult with so much flexibility and relaxation. A lot of times we don't have a strict plan and we'll just go with the flow.
 
I was totally that "too cool for Disney" teenager. Was kind of that adult on the first grown-up trip as we skipped a lot of the attractions we thought had more appeal to literal kids, particularly characters. But after doing the meet & greets during an unexpected solo portion (dad got a cold and started resting at the resort after a short morning in the park), I kind of realized what I personally was missing about WDW. So character meets and/or meals are now a must do. And I built in some time to go on the younger appealing rides like Dumbo, which I haven't been on since I was a kid and has scared me more than any coaster (Heights aren't my thing but I can do roller coasters because they don't give me enough time to think about them. Spoke Rides & Wave Swings...forget about it XD).
Oof, this reminds me of my second trip to WDW--I was in high school and went with a friend my age and her grandmother. Great trip--I met Push while they were doing ExtraTERRORestrial without me (I'd done it at age 12 and was too scared to do it again) and it was like trying to explain a fever dream when we met back up. I don't think they believed me when I told them what had happened.

But the "oof" is because it reminds me that we got an unofficial WDW guide book written by teens and for teens, and the section on Fantasyland was just a spiel about how terrible everything was and how we should just skip it. And we actually took the book's advice. Boggles my mind when I look back on it at age 32. I absolutely adore It's a Small World, and I made a point of riding Snow White's Scary Adventures as an adult when it was still there.
 
@Twinkling: Your post in the OBB thread brought a big smile to my face! After reading this thread, I was a bit concerned for you, but am so glad that the Disney magic came through for you! :)
 
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My bf told me he was saving Disney for his future kids (he's never visited). I said DEFINITELY NOT. I am not trying to plan around kids, push them around on strollers, having to take breaks every time their little feet are tired, put up with potential tantrums, etc. That literally sounds like torture. So now we are going in 2 weeks- completely kid free. And you best believe I'll have the greatest time ever.
 
Perhaps the OP can find some reassurance in the opinion of the man who started it all. The following is the beginning of Walt's dedication of Disneyland:

"To all who come to this happy place: welcome. Disneyland is your land. Here age relives fond memories of the past... and here youth may savor the challenge and promise of the future."

Walt didn't say "To the children... welcome." He said, "To all...". So if Walt says it's okay, you shouldn't feel guilty. 😏
 
I don't think that you should feel guilty at all. I just convinced my DH to go to WDW on an adults-only trip in early 2021...our kids at that point will be 12 and 14 and we are going to LEAVE THE KIDS AT HOME (under the care/watchful eye of my sister). DH feels guilty about going without the kids. But I don't. Aside from our honeymoon, DH & I have NEVER gone on vacation/holiday where either did not involve going to visit relatives or going somewhere with our kids. And we've been married for 24 years. So I think we're overdue for a couples-only/adults-only trip.

Now getting my DH to be willing to do this was also a big deal because on top of feeling guilty for not bringing the kids with us, he's said recently that he's tired of Disney trips (we usually go to Disneyland). But I convinced him with a few hard sales points: :rotfl2:
  • When we went to WDW in June 2018, it was for a work conference DH had to go to. He didn't get to experience much of the parks.
  • DH hated the June weather in Orlando. And I, too, would rather go when it's cooler (hello Jan & Feb!). But we can't go at that time of year if we take the kids.
  • Cost - 2 people costs way less than 4.
  • It doesn't have to be solely a ride-focused trip.
  • You want to spend the morning at MK & have dinner at Epcot? Sure! No problem.
  • You want to try a different fancy restaurant each evening...food that is more exotic than our kids like? Sure! No problem.
  • You want to go to a lounge and hang out for awhile and have a couple of cocktails? Sure! No problem.
  • You want to just sit on a park bench for awhile and not listen to the kids whine about "When can we go on ___? I'm bored sitting here!"? Sure! No problem.
  • You want to sleep in and not listen to the kids whine about getting to the parks super early? Sure! No problem.
The way I look at it is this...Lots of non-Disney people go on vacations to the same place time and time again. Hawaii, the Caribbean, Europe, a cruise, camping up in the mountains for a week, winter skiing in Colorado, etc. Nobody bats an eye when those people say that they're going to their favorite place again. People just say, "Oh great! Have a wonderful time!"

So embrace it. It's your happy place and you love it. So go and have a great time like you know that you will. Don't apologize for it. Disney parks aren't just for kids. If that was true, then heck, Disneyland would probably go out of business. Have you seen the number of adults who go there without children?
 
lol, you should see me on Luigis in Carsland. Im the solo adult singing along, with my hands in the air doing all the actions and chair dancing. Im not just sitting there being the embarrassed adult on kids ride and not joining in cos what would people think! Im the same on Radiator Springs, Im the single rider in a car with strangers hollering and cheering as we go round the race track.

Me Too!!! I just got back and did the same thing! (am also a solo)
:goofy:
 
Lots of non-Disney people go on vacations to the same place time and time again. Hawaii, the Caribbean, Europe, a cruise, camping up in the mountains for a week, winter skiing in Colorado, etc. Nobody bats an eye when those people say that they're going to their favorite place again. People just say, "Oh great! Have a wonderful time!"
For those of us who's family and friends have finally given up questioning our Disney trips, this rings true. For those who are still in the throws of that battle, memorize this statement and roll it out anytime you find yourself defending your choices. And as Disney says "Welcome Home" 🚝
 
When our family goes yet again on a Disneyland trip, sometimes people say to me, "You're going there again?" And then I say to them, "Yeah! Isn't it great?" That always sets them a little off balance and I just smile and sometimes laugh because I know what a great time we're going to have.

You should just totally embrace it and relish in it.
 
The way I look at it is this...Lots of non-Disney people go on vacations to the same place time and time again. Hawaii, the Caribbean, Europe, a cruise, camping up in the mountains for a week, winter skiing in Colorado, etc. Nobody bats an eye when those people say that they're going to their favorite place again. People just say, "Oh great! Have a wonderful time!"

So embrace it. It's your happy place and you love it. So go and have a great time like you know that you will. Don't apologize for it. Disney parks aren't just for kids. If that was true, then heck, Disneyland would probably go out of business. Have you seen the number of adults who go there without children?
The first paragraph is so true, and it drives me nuts. Nobody bats an eye when someone goes to the same resort in mexico year after year. But disney lovers get all sorts of negative comments, questions, and eye rolls whenever they go on repeated disney trips. To heck with the haters! Disney is home for many families/friends/people. Its the one true place where the entire family has fun together. We shouldnt be ashamed of it or apologize for it!
 
All my co-workers are either supportive (have fun!) or jealous (we'd love to go as much as you do) when I mention going back to Disney. I guess I'm lucky enough to not have the people that think it's weird my wife and I do this solo. Kids were part of our younger life and now that they are grown and gone, it's time for us to have the fun we want. Especially now that we have the money to do so (and fewer responsibilities).
 

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