Big Sister Baby Shower

[TipsyTraveler]

This is me doing my small part to inject life into the Community Board.

I have a Facebook friend who is expecting her second child. Today, she posted pictures from the “Big Sister Baby Shower” that was held to celebrate the 9 1/2 year old daughter’s impending big sisterhood. A small venue was rented, there was a theme, decorations, centerpieces, two buffet tables of catered food, and a candy bar. There looked to be seating for about twenty, and there was a big pile of gifts against one wall. I have no idea what kind of gifts people brought to this event, though I’m sure I’ll have more information once this friend posts the rest of the pictures. She’s currently waiting to get them from the photographer. (In fairness, her sister is a photographer, so I assume this is who she was referring to in her post.) The big-sister-to-be went this morning to have her hair and nails done.

It looked like a nice event — Perhaps not “Pinterest-worthy,” but it definitely had all the trappings of a full blown baby shower. This is the first time I’ve heard of such a thing and I’ll be honest, my initial reaction is to think this is ridiculous. I understand taking efforts to make sure older siblings feel loved and included through this kind of family transition, especially if the older sibling is still very young themselves. I would think involving them in the planning and preparations and maybe giving them a special gift from mom and dad would be sufficient. But throwing them their own shower? And for a child at this age who, presumably, should be able to understand and handle this transition relatively well? It seems over the top to me.

Thoughts? Has anyone heard of this, done this, been invited to one?

 

[Southernmiss]

This is me doing my small part to inject life into the Community Board.

I have a Facebook friend who is expecting her second child. Today, she posted pictures from the “Big Sister Baby Shower” that was held to celebrate the 9 1/2 year old daughter’s impending big sisterhood. A small venue was rented, there was a theme, decorations, centerpieces, two buffet tables of catered food, and a candy bar. There looked to be seating for about twenty, and there was a big pile of gifts against one wall. I have no idea what kind of gifts people brought to this event, though I’m sure I’ll have more information once this friend posts the rest of the pictures. She’s currently waiting to get them from the photographer. (In fairness, her sister is a photographer, so I assume this is who she was referring to in her post.) The big-sister-to-be went this morning to have her hair and nails done.

It looked like a nice event — Perhaps not “Pinterest-worthy,” but it definitely had all the trappings of a full blown baby shower. This is the first time I’ve heard of such a thing and I’ll be honest, my initial reaction is to think this is ridiculous. I understand taking efforts to make sure older siblings feel loved and included through this kind of family transition, especially if the older sibling is still very young themselves. I would think involving them in the planning and preparations and maybe giving them a special gift from mom and dad would be sufficient. But throwing them their own shower? And for a child at this age who, presumably, should be able to understand and handle this transition relatively well? It seems over the top to me.

Thoughts? Has anyone heard of this, done this, been invited to one?

My 3 boys were so deprived.

 

[crazylady]

I'm looking forward to more details. I wouldn't even know what kind of gift to give at this party? Are gifts for the big sister or the baby?

 

[ncc1701]

This is me doing my small part to inject life into the Community Board.

I have a Facebook friend who is expecting her second child. Today, she posted pictures from the “Big Sister Baby Shower” that was held to celebrate the 9 1/2 year old daughter’s impending big sisterhood. A small venue was rented, there was a theme, decorations, centerpieces, two buffet tables of catered food, and a candy bar. There looked to be seating for about twenty, and there was a big pile of gifts against one wall. I have no idea what kind of gifts people brought to this event, though I’m sure I’ll have more information once this friend posts the rest of the pictures. She’s currently waiting to get them from the photographer. (In fairness, her sister is a photographer, so I assume this is who she was referring to in her post.) The big-sister-to-be went this morning to have her hair and nails done.

It looked like a nice event — Perhaps not “Pinterest-worthy,” but it definitely had all the trappings of a full blown baby shower. This is the first time I’ve heard of such a thing and I’ll be honest, my initial reaction is to think this is ridiculous. I understand taking efforts to make sure older siblings feel loved and included through this kind of family transition, especially if the older sibling is still very young themselves. I would think involving them in the planning and preparations and maybe giving them a special gift from mom and dad would be sufficient. But throwing them their own shower? And for a child at this age who, presumably, should be able to understand and handle this transition relatively well? It seems over the top to me.

Thoughts? Has anyone heard of this, done this, been invited to one?

This is a new one to me. Heard of smaller shower type events for the Mom with baby # 2 ( never been to one). I am with you in thinking this a bit over the top. What will they do if there is a third ?

 

[aprilgail]

never heard of such a thing and it is certainly not something I would do-

 

[fhtpdw20]

Just when you think you have heard it all. Grandparent showers were bad enough, though I can see the practicality if they are going to be watching the grand a lot so parents don't have to carry necessities back and forth. What's next a shower for the family pet so "fur baby" is not jealous of real baby? Just another gift grab.

 

[Marchand63]

Thinking second marriage? Wanting first kid to feel secure & wanted?

 

[ronandannette]

...This is the first time I’ve heard of such a thing and I’ll be honest, my initial reaction is to think this is ridiculous. I understand taking efforts to make sure older siblings feel loved and included through this kind of family transition, especially if the older sibling is still very young themselves. I would think involving them in the planning and preparations and maybe giving them a special gift from mom and dad would be sufficient. But throwing them their own shower? And for a child at this age who, presumably, should be able to understand and handle this transition relatively well? It seems over the top to me.

Thoughts? Has anyone heard of this, done this, been invited to one?

Go with your gut on this one, TipsyTraveler - it's past ridiculous headed for sublime. Can't wait for the CB thread along the lines of "Looking for ideas to incorporate theme park rides and my pets into a future sibling shower. FTR, I have no children and am not expecting."

 

[kimblebee]

Thinking second marriage? Wanting first kid to feel secure & wanted?

So now we have to have a party for everyone to feel wanted?

I don’t even remember being told that I was going to be a big sister for my sister and first brother. I was 4 and 6 so I should remember. I don’t even remember being told about my younger brother either. I just remember my mom getting bigger and then we went to the hospital to see him. I feel gypped out of three parties LOL

 

[TipsyTraveler]

I'm looking forward to more details. I wouldn't even know what kind of gift to give at this party? Are gifts for the big sister or the baby?

I’m looking forward to getting more details, too. Lol. I’m also curious about what types of gifts were given.

This is a new one to me. Heard of smaller shower type events for the Mom with baby # 2 ( never been to one). I am with you in thinking this a bit over the top. What will they do if there is a third ?

I don’t think there will be a third in this particular circumstance — years of fertility issues combined with Mom’s current age make it unlikely — but I wondered that myself. I googled Big Sister Baby Shower and got results, so apparently this is a thing. But would you do this every time you have another baby? Do the older siblings get a group shower or individual showers? Do big brothers get a shower or something else? I have so many questions...

 

[TipsyTraveler]

Thinking second marriage? Wanting first kid to feel secure & wanted?

Ha! I’m trying to figure out what you would call a child’s bridal shower by proxy.

 

[fhtpdw20]

The world might become a better place if we could get back to the thinking of 1) It's not all about you, 2) Life is not always fair and equal 3) You do your best with the hand your dealt, and 4) The world does not owe you, you owe the world to make the most of the opportunities that come your way.

 

[barkley]

What's next a shower for the family pet so "fur baby" is not jealous of real baby? Just another gift grab.

no real baby was involved but one of the BEST showers ever that i was involved in was for a 'fur baby'. it was a complete surprise for an older co-worker who for DECADES graciously attended and gave a gift at every freaking wedding/baby shower that was held for anyone else in the office (and there were LOTS-on average at least 1-2 a month). people would always privately remark how kind it was of her and how since she had no kids of her own we never got the opportunity to reciprocate UNTIL she made mention that she and her elderly husband were adopting a new cat (theirs had passed several months earlier) so that created a reason for us to go all out. word spread in secret so she was in tears when she walked into the break room at lunch on the monday following the adoption to find it filled with co-workers, decorations, food and enough cat toys to last all 7 lives for that new cat.

BEST SHOWER EVER

 

[PollyannaMom]

I actually think it's kind of cute, especially if it's in place of a shower for the mom.

Usually with second babies, you already have plenty of gear. But in this case, there's been so much time between the two children that they've probably passed a lot of the baby stuff down to friends and family members.

And let's face it, a nine-year-old understands what a new baby in the family really means - the good and the bad. She knows she's going to get less of her parents' time and attention, have her own routines (and maybe sleep) disrupted, and that everybody is going to be gushing over the baby now instead of her. If a party keeps her focused on the good parts instead, maybe it's not such a bad idea?

That said, the danger with this stuff it that it becomes the expected norm. I wouldn't want to see it turn into another "keeping up with the Jones" sort of thing!

 

[DisneyHardin]

no real baby was involved but one of the BEST showers ever that i was involved in was for a 'fur baby'. it was a complete surprise for an older co-worker who for DECADES graciously attended and gave a gift at every freaking wedding/baby shower that was held for anyone else in the office (and there were LOTS-on average at least 1-2 a month). people would always privately remark how kind it was of her and how since she had no kids of her own we never got the opportunity to reciprocate UNTIL she made mention that she and her elderly husband were adopting a new cat (theirs had passed several months earlier) so that created a reason for us to go all out. word spread in secret so she was in tears when she walked into the break room at lunch on the monday following the adoption to find it filled with co-workers, decorations, food and enough cat toys to last all 7 lives for that new cat.

BEST SHOWER EVER

We did this for a co-worker before too. It was so much fun. We got her tons of cat toys and treats. For the food, I made a litter box cake.

 

[jrmasm]

Where did she register?

 

[Skellingtonj]

It’s called a “sprinkle”. It’s usually smaller then a shower for your first kid. 9 years between kids is a pretty big gap. I’m sure people bought her baby gifts. I don’t see the big deal

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

It’s called a “sprinkle”. It’s usually smaller then a shower for your first kid. 9 years between kids is a pretty big gap. I’m sure people bought her baby gifts. I don’t see the big deal

I thought a “sprinkle” was for any baby after your first...


Between this and “Promposals” my kids are going to feel really left out

 

[ramee]

It’s called a “sprinkle”. It’s usually smaller then a shower for your first kid. 9 years between kids is a pretty big gap. I’m sure people bought her baby gifts. I don’t see the big deal

Am I misreading? I think this big sister shower is in honor of the big sister. Guests would bring gifts for the 9 year old as she is the focus. Like it was a birthday party.

At first, I thought it was ridiculous. But it seems it’s just an excuse to throw a fun party. Guests could decline if they don’t agree with it.

I could see the mom wanting to dote on her only child of 9 years before she has to divide up her attention. Maybe like a last hoorah similar to people’s idea of baby moon (which I never did, either. Unless you count my anniversary trip when I happened to be expecting my second).

 

[AppleDumpling]

I’ve never heard of this. Never been to a baby shower for anyone other than a first-time mother.

What I have done is given a gift, usually a book or small toy, to a new big brother/sister. Only within my family and close friends, after the baby is born, when visiting for the first time. It’s always been children of preschool age or younger, but I’d give something to a 9-yo as well (although I wouldn’t throw them a party).