Big Sister Baby Shower

[anniemae]

Never heard of it, would never do, would never attend one. But that's just me.

I understand wanting to ease the child into sisterhood as she has (presumably) been an only child for almost 10 years. I think a nicer idea would be have a sprinkle for mom and just have the 9 year old assist and be a big part of the planning. Having an event like that for the child CAN set a tone of, "you are special, you are the star, you are amazing, you are the best etc." Then again, in our society everyone wins, everyone gets a trophy, everyone is special etc.

Also, from my understanding a "sprinkle" is a scaled-down shower (hence the name sprinkle) for mom. A less lavish affair than a shower, usually for 2nd or 3rd time moms who probably have much of the baby stuff.

 

[design_mom]

Were the guests adults? Or the 9 year old's friends?

I think the idea of a shower with adults bringing gifts to the 9yo big sister (like a birthday party) seems odd. However, I do know of a couple of instances where a girl found out she was going to be a big sister at a much older age than most kids. (When I was in 8th grade, a classmate's parents decided to start their "second family". One of my son's classmates' parents had a new baby when the older sister was a sophomore.) In both cases, the older sister's friends kind of made a big deal out of welcoming the new sibling. I believe in my case, we brought baby gifts after the baby was born (not a shower)... but especially things like a picture frame that says "Sisters!" and things like that. I think my son's classmate's friends might have thrown a party before the baby arrived. I don't think they called it a "shower" but it was kind of the same thing. If the group of friends want to celebrate, then I don't have a problem with it... as long as no one feels obligated. (But I can't tell if that's the case here... or if it was a traditional shower, but bring something for the 9 year old instead of the baby.)

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

For my next kid, I'm having a big sister shower, a big brother shower, an auntie shower, an uncle shower. A third cousin twice removed shower, etc, etc. And anyone invited better cover their plates.

 

[NYCgrrl]

I thought a “sprinkle” was for any baby after your first...


Between this and “Promposals” my kids are going to feel really left out

Wuzzat?

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Wuzzat?

Big, elaborate ways to ask someone to prom... Not unlike marriage proposals.

 

[NYCgrrl]

Big, elaborate ways to ask someone to prom... Not unlike marriage proposals.

Thanks for the explanation and okay. I was thinking it was some kind of marriage proposal much too early in the game, LOL.

 

[anniemae]

In this thread we have covered a trifecta of ridiculousness. A sibling shower, a cat shower and a promposal. Now has anyone been to all three?

 

[crazylady]

This is me doing my small part to inject life into the Community Board.

I have a Facebook friend who is expecting her second child. Today, she posted pictures from the “Big Sister Baby Shower” that was held to celebrate the 9 1/2 year old daughter’s impending big sisterhood. A small venue was rented, there was a theme, decorations, centerpieces, two buffet tables of catered food, and a candy bar. There looked to be seating for about twenty, and there was a big pile of gifts against one wall. I have no idea what kind of gifts people brought to this event, though I’m sure I’ll have more information once this friend posts the rest of the pictures. She’s currently waiting to get them from the photographer. (In fairness, her sister is a photographer, so I assume this is who she was referring to in her post.) The big-sister-to-be went this morning to have her hair and nails done.

It looked like a nice event — Perhaps not “Pinterest-worthy,” but it definitely had all the trappings of a full blown baby shower. This is the first time I’ve heard of such a thing and I’ll be honest, my initial reaction is to think this is ridiculous. I understand taking efforts to make sure older siblings feel loved and included through this kind of family transition, especially if the older sibling is still very young themselves. I would think involving them in the planning and preparations and maybe giving them a special gift from mom and dad would be sufficient. But throwing them their own shower? And for a child at this age who, presumably, should be able to understand and handle this transition relatively well? It seems over the top to me.

Thoughts? Has anyone heard of this, done this, been invited to one?

Did you see anymore pictures? I'm curious nas to who attended and what kinds of gifts were shared.

 

[Lilacs4Me]

A few days late, but -

DS18 and DD14 are 4 years apart, and I had the same due date for both (July 4th). DS18 was born on June 29th and 4 years later DD comes along the day before his 4th birthday. We had made tentative plans to have his birthday party that week and I had bought Shrek II decorations and everything. DH ended up bringing the stuff to the hospital and we decorated the room and gave him little presents that DH bought on the way (like a candy bar and a little toy from Walgreens! haha). We did a little cupcake in the hospital for him and sang happy birthday. My mom and SIL brought him his birthday present when they came to visit, along with a present for the baby.

My sister is having a baby girl in Jan. Her older son will be 10 in March. Both kids are "1-in -a-million-chance-" babies due to fertility issues, both conceived naturally and both were very happy surprises. We are throwing her a little brunch Thanksgiving weekend because we WANT to give her presents for our new little niece! She isn't expecting anything and is grateful for anything she gets. Her son is not involved in planning this in any way, and will not be at the brunch. He is almost 10 years old and has had 10 years of being the shining star in their lives! There is no way she would, or any of us would, coddle our kids to the point that they would need that much attention when becoming a sibling.

FWIW, I have 4 sister and two brothers, and we were pretty much told "I'm having another baby" and that was about it. The only special treatment we got was having to get bunk beds.

 

[TipsyTraveler]

Did you see anymore pictures? I'm curious nas to who attended and what kinds of gifts were shared.

Thanks for the reminder! I just checked her Facebook and yes, more pictures have been posted. After looking through them for clues, this is what I can tell you:

There were eight little girls in attendance who looked to be the big sister’s friends. There were about twice as many adults, most of whom looked to be a generation older than the mom-to-be. Everyone was wearing name tags so I assume they weren’t all family.

Big sister sat at the head of the room to open gifts and read cards with the occasional assist from Mom. Half of the gifts were obvious baby items expressly for the baby (clothing, rattles, tummy time mat). Some gifts were for the baby but also the big sister (matching outfits and accessories). Others looked like they were probably just for the older sister but I can’t be sure — keepsake/jewelry box, ceramic piggy bank (but not a pig and in a style more appropriate to the older daughter). One or two items were definitely for Mom (bottle of whiskey).

Mom-to-be also had a shower thrown by her coworkers this week. If she’s planning to have a shower with friends, I would guess that one is still to come because she had few, if any, of her friends at either of these showers.

 

[Skellingtonj]

Thanks for the reminder! I just checked her Facebook and yes, more pictures have been posted. After looking through them for clues, this is what I can tell you:

There were eight little girls in attendance who looked to be the big sister’s friends. There were about twice as many adults, most of whom looked to be a generation older than the mom-to-be. Everyone was wearing name tags so I assume they weren’t all family.

Big sister sat at the head of the room to open gifts and read cards with the occasional assist from Mom. Half of the gifts were obvious baby items expressly for the baby (clothing, rattles, tummy time mat). Some gifts were for the baby but also the big sister (matching outfits and accessories). Others looked like they were probably just for the older sister but I can’t be sure — keepsake/jewelry box, ceramic piggy bank (but not a pig and in a style more appropriate to the older daughter). One or two items were definitely for Mom (bottle of whiskey).

Mom-to-be also had a shower thrown by her coworkers this week. If she’s planning to have a shower with friends, I would guess that one is still to come because she had few, if any, of her friends at either of these showers.

We’ll that clears it up. Lol. I still have no idea why they had this party for the big sister if all the gifts were for the baby.

 

[crazylady]

Thanks for the reminder! I just checked her Facebook and yes, more pictures have been posted. After looking through them for clues, this is what I can tell you:

There were eight little girls in attendance who looked to be the big sister’s friends. There were about twice as many adults, most of whom looked to be a generation older than the mom-to-be. Everyone was wearing name tags so I assume they weren’t all family.

Big sister sat at the head of the room to open gifts and read cards with the occasional assist from Mom. Half of the gifts were obvious baby items expressly for the baby (clothing, rattles, tummy time mat). Some gifts were for the baby but also the big sister (matching outfits and accessories). Others looked like they were probably just for the older sister but I can’t be sure — keepsake/jewelry box, ceramic piggy bank (but not a pig and in a style more appropriate to the older daughter). One or two items were definitely for Mom (bottle of whiskey).

Mom-to-be also had a shower thrown by her coworkers this week. If she’s planning to have a shower with friends, I would guess that one is still to come because she had few, if any, of her friends at either of these showers.

Thanks. I'm so glad I'm done having kids!

 

[monica9]

Just when you think you have heard it all. Grandparent showers were bad enough, though I can see the practicality if they are going to be watching the grand a lot so parents don't have to carry necessities back and forth. What's next a shower for the family pet so "fur baby" is not jealous of real baby? Just another gift grab.

Grandparent showers??

 

[dotfurio]

Grandparent showers??

I've actually been to two of these for coworkers. The one I thought was cute was a grandma's library shower, where guests were asked to bring their favorite picture book as a gift to the first time grandma.

The other was like a regular shower, with diapers and baby clothes. Some people even bought her expensive stuff like a car seat, a high chair, etc. It was if she were having/raising the baby. I thought it was strange because the grandma worked full time so she wouldn't be watching the baby outside of babysitting here and there. The mom had her own home and had her own shower with friends and family. So it didn't make much sense to me. I imagine the grandma gave most of the stuff to the mom.

 

[PollyannaMom]

The one I thought was cute was a grandma's library shower, where guests were asked to bring their favorite picture book as a gift to the first time grandma.

That is kind of cute. - I'm a sucker for anything to do with books.

 

[dosekies]

Never heard of this - if it really was for the daughter and gifts were for her, I think it's kind of ridiculous. I feel like it would be better to make sure the child still gets some dedicated attention or small 'treats' once the baby arrives to still make them feel special.

My brother and SIL just had their second baby and my first niece is about to be 6. We tried to prepare her for no longer being the only child and it has been good so far, but they also prepared with 'big sister gifts' for her for the first few weeks when people bring gifts for the baby. Nothing big, but if someone comes to their house with gifts for Baby Trudy, Autumn gets a 'big sister gift' from her mom and dad which consists of something small (dollar store coloring book, tube of bubbles, cute pair of undies, a small craft, etc). I really liked the idea when I went to the house and the best part was that my older niece was genuinely excited about both what I brought for the baby AND the little gift she got, too!

 

[monica9]

I've actually been to two of these for coworkers. The one I thought was cute was a grandma's library shower, where guests were asked to bring their favorite picture book as a gift to the first time grandma.

The other was like a regular shower, with diapers and baby clothes. Some people even bought her expensive stuff like a car seat, a high chair, etc. It was if she were having/raising the baby. I thought it was strange because the grandma worked full time so she wouldn't be watching the baby outside of babysitting here and there. The mom had her own home and had her own shower with friends and family. So it didn't make much sense to me. I imagine the grandma gave most of the stuff to the mom.

The books are a good idea or little grandparents trinkets/photo frames but large baby gear and diapers for a grandparent who won't babysit often? That is just really odd.

 

[monica9]

I have two kids 8 1/2 years apart due to infertility too but would never think about having a party for the older one. Having a sibling is a gift in itself. I do think it's cute to bring something small for the older sibling when the baby is born. Nothing big though.

 

[scoutie]

Big, elaborate ways to ask someone to prom... Not unlike marriage proposals.

These have become big here, (along with homecoming proposals) and everytime I see the big fuss surrounding them I think that these kids are going to be disappointed with real life and marriage lol.

 

[tcufrog]

In this thread we have covered a trifecta of ridiculousness. A sibling shower, a cat shower and a promposal. Now has anyone been to all three?

If we can come up with enough similar ridiculous events we could make a BINGO card.