Blended family sharing hotel room

[cndmama05]

Hi all
We are travelling as a family with my stepson (13) and daughter' (5 and 1). Dh doesn't want to get 2 hotel rooms or even a suite unfortunately so we are stuck having to share a room. The problem is that I am still nursing my 1 year old at night and in hotel rooms especially we let her sleep in our bed and she often will want to nurse throughout the night. Stepson doesn't live with us normally and only comes to visit a few times a year and has his own room at our house so I am starting to get uncomfortable with the thought of nursing while he is in the same room. Does anyone have any suggestions?

 

[KrazeeK120]

I’m not sure there is a whole lot you can do if you’re all in the same room aside from physically getting up and nursing in the bathroom or bringing some kind of nursing cover with you.

It might not end up being too big of a deal...the 13 YO is likely to be asleep in the middle of the night.

How far away is your trip? Any chance your 1 year old will be weaned by then?

 

[cndmama05]

I’m not sure there is a whole lot you can do if you’re all in the same room aside from physically getting up and nursing in the bathroom or bringing some kind of nursing cover with you.

It might not end up being too big of a deal...the 13 YO is likely to be asleep in the middle of the night.

How far away is your trip? Any chance your 1 year old will be weaned by then?

Our trip is at the end of January so most likely won't be weaned. Anyway I am looking at hotel rooms with a sofa bed so hopefully with the other queen bed in between us, he won't be able to see "anything" if he wakes up when the baby cries...

 

[cnavarrete]

One, I agree with the PP that he will probably sleep through whatever middle of the night nursing that you do. Two, I nursed both my younger children in front of my 12 year (then 14 when the youngest was born) stepson - even when his friends were over. It's a part of life. I think it's completely appropriate to nurse your baby in bed in a dark room while your stepson sleeps nearby. I wouldn't let it make you change up your baby's routine while on vacation. Good luck!

 

[Beachmom0317]

I think you’ll be okay, kids will probably be so exhausted from all the stimulation and busy park days!

 

[marcyleecorgan]

.... Or the stepson can listen to wailing, hungry baby.

Or if it really bothers him that much, he can get up and stand in the hallway so he doesn't have to be in the same room. After about three times, that'll seem ridiculous and I hope everyone will just settle into their beds and let you feed the baby!

*giggling at why this is even a thing* I presume your stepson knows that breastfeeding exists? Probably a good idea to just ignore the NON-hangry person who can walk off under their own power, and focus on the little one who CAN and will bite you

 

[mjkacmom]

God bless you, if my babies weren’t sleeping through the night by 2 months they CIO for a couple of nights. I need my 8 hours.

 

[DisneyWishes14]

I also think you’ll be ok. We are also a blended family and I nursed my son in front of my older stepsons. I just used a nursing cover or light blanket. It was never a big deal. Especially at night in the dark he probably won’t see anything.

 

[Allison]

Or if it really bothers him that much, he can get up and stand in the hallway so he doesn't have to be in the same room. After about three times, that'll seem ridiculous and I hope everyone will just settle into their beds and let you feed the baby!

The OP said she was the one uncomfortable, not the stepson.

 

[cndmama05]

The OP said she was the one uncomfortable, not the stepson.

Haha yes I am the one uncomfortable with it all. We talk about nursing in front of him but I I usually either go into another room or ask him to go when we are at home.
My daughter is a horrible sleeper especially not at home so I can already foresee long sleepless nights

 

[QueenIsabella]

I guess I don't understand what is making you uncomfortable. I have 4 kids over an 11-year span, and I nursed the last three. Especially the younger two, they were nursed everywhere--the mall, the side of soccer fields, at ballet recitals, backstage during a musical--if the kid needs to eat, they need to eat! I always tried to be discreet, but babies don't always cooperate. I guess my point is, my older kids knew I breastfed, knew when I was doing it in the family room or whatever, it just wasn't a big deal. For any of us. Sure, it was a little unnerving when my youngest bit me, just as my niece's boyfriend was walking in the room, causing me to scream and expose. But, what are you going to do? My point is, doesn't your stepson already know that you breastfeed? Doesn't he, occasionally, see you do it?

I have to say, too, by a year, I was completely exhausted from night feedings with my youngest. We ended up having Dad get up with him, and soothe him back to sleep. It only took a couple nights for him to give up and sleep through. He was nursing for comfort, rather than nutrition, and I was so, so tired from not getting a good night's sleep. I'm not saying you should wean completely, unless you want to, but night time feedings really aren't necessary. So if it bugs you, it would be easy to stop, well before the vacation.

 

[KrazeeK120]

God bless you, if my babies weren’t sleeping through the night by 2 months they CIO for a couple of nights. I need my 8 hours.

To be fair, most babies still need to eat at least once in the middle of the night at 2 months old. My son stopped needing a middle of the night bottle when he was almost 6 months old.

At a year, yeah, the kid is probably nursing for comfort. But if the family is ok with that, then cool.

 

[Lvsdisney]

If it really makes you that uncomfortable, you should talk with your DH about getting a suite.

If you want suggestions, you can try to fasten a divider of sorts between the beds, but I think that's overkill.

Are you worried about the 13 yo seeing something? I would think you're a "pro" by now and can be fast and discreet. Plus at night, it's dark, so pretty hard to see anything to begin with. I'd wear an outfit to bed that you feel covers enough and keep a blanket near by to throw over your child during nursing just in case she removes her self suddenly. Or you can do the side-lying nurse, if possible, that's pretty discreet.

Overall, I will tell you not to stress about it.

 

[cndmama05]

I found a hotel with a sofa bed plus 2 queen beds so with the other bed in between us, it should be fine. Thank you for everyone's suggestions!

 

[Thing 1]

I would consider just choosing sleep clothes; as well as day clothes that will let you be modest in your nursing. You will likely be nursing her more and in lots of different places on this trip that within a day or two it should pretty much be second nature. I would not ask him to leave the family while you nurse. I had a SIL that did that with her step-child and it really broke her heart to be excluded so often. If you don’t make it a big deal, it should not be a big deal.

 

[Hikergirl]

I'm going to assume that if you are uncomfortable with your own stepson seeing something then you are just as uncomfortable about a stranger so what do you do when out and about? Do you use a cover or blanket? Just do that in the hotel room.
Or tell your dh that you want a suite with a separate room. It is going to be hard enough to have an infant in a room you are all sharing without the breastfeeding issue you have, tell your dh the cost is worth everyone's sanity

 

[rigs32]

I'm still confused about who is sleeping where..... You, DH, and the baby in one bed. And stepson plus your five year old daughter in the other? I'd be more concerned about that than middle of the night nursing.

I'd also be thinking long and hard about whether the baby is going to wake everyone up throughout the night. You and your DH are used to it by now, but how do the others sleep? Sleep deprivation from sharing one room can lead to a very cranky trip.

 

[Cinderella94]

If this is really important to you, which it sounds like it is, and you've communicated that to DH and he still won't budge on getting a suite, then that's what bothers me the most about all of this.

 

[Cinderella94]

I'm still confused about who is sleeping where..... You, DH, and the baby in one bed. And stepson plus your five year old daughter in the other? I'd be more concerned about that than middle of the night nursing.

I'd also be thinking long and hard about whether the baby is going to wake everyone up throughout the night. You and your DH are used to it by now, but how do the others sleep? Sleep deprivation from sharing one room can lead to a very cranky trip.

I agree with all of this, too. Plus, that many people sharing 1 bathroom is my nightmare.

 

[mjkacmom]

I'm still confused about who is sleeping where..... You, DH, and the baby in one bed. And stepson plus your five year old daughter in the other? I'd be more concerned about that than middle of the night nursing.

I'd also be thinking long and hard about whether the baby is going to wake everyone up throughout the night. You and your DH are used to it by now, but how do the others sleep? Sleep deprivation from sharing one room can lead to a very cranky trip.

I think the teen is supposed to sleep on the sofa bed. I’d put the teen in the other queen, and put the 5 year old on the sofa bed, I assume she is smaller.