Dealing with the "Over-packer" ... and the intervention...

My husband is an over packer. He finally backed off a bit when we came back from a vacation and he had 15 shirts he never wore. It was a 5 night trip. He still packs way more than me but he's scaled back to 1.5 times what he needs versus 3 times. Next month he's going to try 6 nights with just a carry on. ha!

As long as your friend was open to scaling back, it was nice of you to help her. I hope she has an amazing vacation.
 
Ship's laundry. Even if the ship has no laundry room, it has laundry service. Probably more economical than multiple overweight, oversi st bags.


Put everything you need that will fit, in your personal item. Put the rest of your carry on stuff in that, then fill with heavier stuff that you'd normally check. Lift it to make sure you can. Then put everything else in the checked bag.
I already put all the shoes and anything made out of denim in the carry-on. Our biggest weight issues are our toiletries because a lot of that stuff can't be carried-on. We actually weighed them before this trip; mine weighs 11lbs. and DH's weighed 9'ish. That's almost half the 50lb. limit on a checked bag and I don't want to do without any of it.
Here's one way to cut down on the clothing you need to pack. These shirts are double layered and can be flipped and turned inside-out multiple ways to look like different shirts.

https://www.morf-fashion.com
Yawn. Give us a new idea. :rotfl2: My 21 y.o. DS has been doing that for years with his regular shirts just because he's too slobby to keep up with laundry. ;) (Don't ask about the underpants.)
 
This is a topic near my heart. We came home a few days ago from 9 days in Scotland. It was me, husband and our 18 month old son. We had 3 checked bags but one of them was golf clubs! My husband used ~50% of our 2 suitcases because he was playing golf everyday in terrible weather. I re wore most of my clothes for the first time ever on a trip. We were so limited because we had to take heavy/bulkly clothes because of the weather. I did have to do laundry because, my little guy couldn't rewear any of his clothes. I consider myself organized and fairly good at packing but this trip tested my limits! I think this will be the only trip that my easy going and minimalist husband over packs me! I can't wait for our wdw trip when all i have to do is drop my bags at the airport and the next time I see my luggage is at my room at the Poly (and no golf clubs!)
 


Wow, that's a lot of time to spend on someone else's vacation. I can't imagine.

She didn't spend the time on her friend's vacation, she spent it on her friend. What a gift to be able to help your friend with a problem!

I had a friend who helped me paint the high parts of my great room because I was afraid to stand on the scaffolding. I helped a friend organize her office because I like to organize. It's what friends do!
 
I stopped even trying with over packers. I just take the mindset that it's their mess to deal with. I'm not helping carry that luggage, get it up stairs, on transportation, anything like that. I ignore any complaints about luggage from people who pack more than they know they should.

Exactly... I can't agree more, and when we went to NYC girls trip... I told her, you need to be able to move your own luggage, everyone has their own luggage to deal with and you need be able to take care of yours...while we had a super fun trip, she had a really hard time getting the idea that no-one was going to haul her luggage for her.
 


@LovesTimone I hope you aren’t taking the comments disparaging your friend’s husband personally. He obviously knows her best, and that she needed some help. I think what you did was great and you clearly have a knack for that kind of thing - obviously not everybody does. Having done a very similar itinerary last year and schlepping luggage across 2 continents, the issue was as much having the wrong stuff as having too much stuff. I’d have loved to have had your help and really loved not having to pay baggage fees. :wave2:

Not at all... she knows that she is an over packer. We had fun day getting her ready to go... lots of laughter, no hard feelings... the whole family is going, both of her, sons their spouses, and grandkids... so her DH is standing firm of the amount of luggage.
 
Last edited:
She didn't spend the time on her friend's vacation, she spent it on her friend. What a gift to be able to help your friend with a problem!

I had a friend who helped me paint the high parts of my great room because I was afraid to stand on the scaffolding. I helped a friend organize her office because I like to organize. It's what friends do!

Thanks for that... Yes I did spend it with my friend... She a wonderful woman...and we did have fun...
 
Yes, I've only sailed on RCCL and none of their ships have self laundry. I didn't realize other lines have laundry rooms.

We checked the ship, and it showed the ironing stations, and laundry... If not they can have some of it done, and do the rest in Italy at the home they rented.
 
One other thing.. How are you guys traveling after the cruise?? city to city with a train? Can she carry all this? do you have a large enough rental....

This is her families trip, I just went over to help her pack... I'm not sure on once the cruise is over how they are getting around.
 
I am generally not an overpacker -- I spent 3 weeks in Russia with an infant and only packed 1 bag (max 40 pounds) for both of us. However, we're going on an Alaskan cruise (not Disney) this summer and I'm not sure how I'm going to fit it all in one suitcase. Dressing for dinner? Formal nights? Ugh. I'm a one-outfit-per-day kind of person. And it sounds like the weather could be.. anything! I'm hoping that as it gets closer, I'll have a better idea.
We skip formal nights on cruises. Half the reason is the packing dilemna. The other half is because we don't like formal nights.
 
We skip formal nights on cruises. Half the reason is the packing dilemna. The other half is because we don't like formal nights.

I would totally skip, but it's an extended family trip to celebrate my parents' 50th wedding anniversary. My mother is looking forward to formal night, although my dad is grousing about having to wear a tie. "Why do I have to wear a tie? I haven't worn a tie in over 30 years!" (although I have a photo of him in a tie 2 years ago at a family wedding. :p ) I wonder how much of a faux pas it is to wear the same dress to BOTH formal nights?
 
I don’t mind doing laundry when away so happy to pack light, although I draw the line at carry on only. For our last trip we took a medium case each (4 of us) as we needed stuff for both hot (Mexico) and freezing (Canada, DC, NYC) climates. And we were away for 6 weeks. (We did have to buy a couple of extra cases to bring home - but that doesn’t count, right).

Next trip will be in Winter only so should get away with 2 medium, perhaps 3 at max. The only time I’d consider carry on only is tripping to Asia.
 
I would totally skip, but it's an extended family trip to celebrate my parents' 50th wedding anniversary. My mother is looking forward to formal night, although my dad is grousing about having to wear a tie. "Why do I have to wear a tie? I haven't worn a tie in over 30 years!" (although I have a photo of him in a tie 2 years ago at a family wedding. :p ) I wonder how much of a faux pas it is to wear the same dress to BOTH formal nights?

I have an idea for formal nights... you can get a long or mid length black skirt or black cocktail style pants, and 2 blouse to go with...as most of the picture will only show from about the waist up...just a thought...
 
I would totally skip, but it's an extended family trip to celebrate my parents' 50th wedding anniversary. My mother is looking forward to formal night, although my dad is grousing about having to wear a tie. "Why do I have to wear a tie? I haven't worn a tie in over 30 years!" (although I have a photo of him in a tie 2 years ago at a family wedding. :p ) I wonder how much of a faux pas it is to wear the same dress to BOTH formal nights?

Not everyone dresses up on formal night & at least on RCCL they won't kick you out. I have seen shorts & t shirts on formal night. We like to dress so we do.
 
My husband was a chronic over packer. I would count out the shirts he planned to bring and discover that he averaged three shirts for every day of travel. I would force him to pare it down but he would still end up bringing back numerous unworn shirts at the end of the trip. The cure? he started traveling - a lot - for work. He has figured out how to take just what he needs.

Of course, now that he has become alight packer, he ended up getting snowed in on a trip and had to buy underwear at Walmart one time. I try to tell him to take one spare pair and an extra day's dose of his medication just in case.
 
Wow, so the husband treats her like a child and her own "friend" is in on it? That's offensive and rude. She's an adult. She can pack however she wants.
I thought that way too but I think it was influenced by the OP's description of the husband calling her because he didn't want to pay for an additional checked luggage and that it was an 'intervention'.

I would have no problem calling my best friend up saying "hey can you come help me pack" and then we use it as girl time as well. It would be a bit different if my husband called my best friend and was like "she needs help I'm not paying for another checked bag you're so good at packing small".

Obviously it's all good according to the OP with their friendship dynamic and not everyone would have a problem with their husband calling but I would personally rather my husband tell me "ok so let's do 1 checked luggage so we don't have to lug around and pay another large suitcase" and then it be my decision to call my friend or not. It's also different calling for advice like "what should I wear for travel days" since the OP would have said 3 outfits for travel day was overkill. That would be some assistance rather than taking over the whole packing entirely.
 
I would totally skip, but it's an extended family trip to celebrate my parents' 50th wedding anniversary. My mother is looking forward to formal night, although my dad is grousing about having to wear a tie. "Why do I have to wear a tie? I haven't worn a tie in over 30 years!" (although I have a photo of him in a tie 2 years ago at a family wedding. :p ) I wonder how much of a faux pas it is to wear the same dress to BOTH formal nights?

I think if it is a simpler dress you could dress it up with different jewelry and a wrap one night and maybe a sweater the next it would be perfectly fine, likely no one will even notice. That's totally what I would do and not give it a second thought. Have a great time, sounds like a lot of fun!
 
We usually make do with 1 checked + 1 carry on total for 2 adults / 2 kids on our trips that involve flying. Then we each also take a small backpack. Even with that I feel like I'm always taking too much.
 

GET A DISNEY VACATION QUOTE

Dreams Unlimited Travel is committed to providing you with the very best vacation planning experience possible. Our Vacation Planners are experts and will share their honest advice to help you have a magical vacation.

Let us help you with your next Disney Vacation!










Top