Girls trip, I'm booking my own room..not sharing.... now there's drama...

Control freaks are the worst. It is control freaks that are friends and friends of friends that I refuse to travel with. I will hang out in a group with them or do lunch as a group but never one on one or a girls trip.

I prefer tops 5 women on one trip. I did do a bachelorette party and I shared a room with 8 other women. I was hesitant about sharing with that many women but we had a penthouse suite so I went for it. We had an AWESOME time. I was actually surprised. Now the bride is a complete control freak and ruined the whole trip for herself (she was in a separate room with her MOH and separate friends) but us 9 still had fun on our own.

A bachelorette party is something I would not be invited to, I'm like the Nana! LOL!

I could handle 5 women if they were my sister and daughters and nieces. 5 friends would be stressful for me, and I would need my own space.

Years ago my DH used to go to the Daytona 500 with a bunch of guys. We were not married at the time, but we were a couple. Anyway, the last time he went with this bunch he started acting odd before the trip and asked me to come. No. He asked if I could get my sister to go with me and we could join them. No. Then he told me one of the group backed out. Hmmmmmmm..... Curiouser and curiouser.... Well I chose not to say anything, but I knew something was wrong. He went from looking forward to this vacation to seeming to dread it. He must have called me 3 times a day every day while he was away, and since this was before cell phones, that was unusual. By then I have figured out that the group of all men was crashed by the two female drivers he worked with.


So once he got home he told me the who sad tale. Two of the guys thought that they were funny and invited two women to join them. Buddy was one of the only single men there, and they thought it would be hysterical. Before they left they denied the women were going, but he had a feeling they were planning a "surprise" for him, especially since that guy had bowed out. Well, once they got to the hotel he checked into his room he told the guys he was not sharing the room. WHAT????? Sorry boys. They though that they were going to be able to share space! No. He let one friend, a nice guy whose girlfriend was home too, share when he was ready to go back home. He said they had connecting doors, and on the arrival night the door opens up and in strolls one of the women, in a see through nightgown. he tossed her out, locked the door and laughed the rest of the week at all those guys piled in that one room, complete with two women stringing clothes to dry up, etc. He said that the guys joke backfired and they were pretty miserable the whole time. It really was a shame though because he never trusted them enough to go to the races with them again.
 
No, I wouldn't be offended.

Nor would I plan anymore trips with that "friend." I love group trips but my #1 rule is- make sure it's a compatible group. There are some we travel really well with and others who I enjoy but our travel/vacation styles are too different for a group trip to be a good idea.
 
No, I wouldn't be offended.

Nor would I plan anymore trips with that "friend." I love group trips but my #1 rule is- make sure it's a compatible group. There are some we travel really well with and others who I enjoy but our travel/vacation styles are too different for a group trip to be a good idea.

I've made that decision for sure. If it's people who just don't fit with you, why continue vacationing with them. One of my dearest and I have distanced ourselves from a group we enjoy locally but that just simply aren't a good fit in regards to travel partners.
 


Two years ago I passed on a trip with friends when it was clear we'd be on the pullout in the living room. Nope.

This year I passed on that same group trip when the house they booked sleeps 10, but only has one bathroom. Very big nope.

I have done a beach vacation with 23, but we had a bedroom with an ensuite, so it was fine.
 
Two years ago I passed on a trip with friends when it was clear we'd be on the pullout in the living room. Nope.

This year I passed on that same group trip when the house they booked sleeps 10, but only has one bathroom. Very big nope.

I have done a beach vacation with 23, but we had a bedroom with an ensuite, so it was fine.

I've done that too. Actually for the bachelorette party I spoke about earlier in the thread, the MOH wanted to get a house with two bathrooms and squeeze 15 girls into it. And have some of us get air mattresses. I told her I wasn't 19 on Spring Break and if I'm going away I'm sleeping on a real bed. I was going to book a separate hotel room but then 9 of us just decided to get a separate suite. There's no way I'm going away and being uncomfortable.
 
Unless I am traveling with my husband/son/best friend, I get my own room.

Health issues mean I have to get the sleep that I need. A roommate up all night, or going in and out, would mess me up.

I plan my vacations. Other people don't.
 


We did a spa weekend for my younger sister's bridal party. We rented a suite so we had to share rooms and shared beds. I slept with the bride as the others were friends with each other. Had not done that since we were kids at the grandparents. I was reminded why. My sister does (or did) midnight Kung Fu. The second night I order extra pillows and built a wall like Grannie used to build when we were kids. Her girlfriends laughed until I showed them the bruise on my leg. My kid does the same thing and I will always book a room so that she gets her OWN bed.
 
I have to respectfully disagree with the posters that have said that girls' weekends with a lot of women is a recipe for disaster. A few weekends ago was our 18th annual girls weekend. There are 11 of us that are involved and we usually have between 9-11 of us in attendance. This year we were at 10. We had 3 hotel rooms and most of us shared beds. It doesn't bother any of us to share. The two girls---well, women--we're all 46--who like to have the AC on high shared one room and then the other 8 had connecting rooms. We are elementary/middle/high school friends although some of our friendships go back to preschool, so maybe that makes a difference in why we all get along so well. I do think we are a bit of an anomaly as I don't know any other large groups who have been friends for 35+ years. Each year, a different person picks the location, so you only have to be "in charge" every 11 years. There is very loose planning for activities during the days. We all keep everyone updated on what we're each doing, but often split into smaller groups. Whoever has picked the location is in charge of dinner reservations for Friday and Saturday night. We have yet to have any problems, but again, this may go back to how long we've all been friends. I can't imagine that anyone would ever ask someone else not in our group to join us. I don't even know why anyone else would want to come. We do a ton of reminiscing, reliving our youth over and over.

To answer the original question, I wouldn't be the least bit offended if someone said they wanted their own room. They would just have to pay for it. Currently, we just divide the hotel bill by however many of there are. It's never based on who slept in which room.
 
Jen, I don't care how long I have known a friend or how well everyone gets along.
I AM NOT SHARING A BED.... (a room, well maybe... a bed... NEVER)

I actually see that as an issue...
There are those out there who actually see sharing a bed, drinks/food, etc.. as a necessary 'proof of friendship'.
Like they NEED this, and will be mortally offended... (to bad if you would have to deal with offended friends and be excuded from these trips and lose friendships if you personally required a bed of your own.)
No real 'friend' would be that way.
I do not choose to be friends with anyone who has that 'need'.

There is something that I like to call reasonable personal boundaries.
 
Jen, I don't care how long I have known a friend or how well everyone gets along.
I AM NOT SHARING A BED.... (a room, well maybe... a bed... NEVER)

I actually see that as an issue...
There are those out there who actually see sharing a bed, drinks/food, etc.. as a necessary 'proof of friendship'.
Like they NEED this, and will be mortally offended... (to bad if you would have to deal with offended friends and be excuded from these trips and lose friendships if you personally required a bed of your own.)
No real 'friend' would be that way.
I do not choose to be friends with anyone who has that 'need'.

There is something that I like to call reasonable personal boundaries.

What the heck are you referring to in Jen's post?? She said nothing of the sort. In fact, she specifically said that she wouldn't mind at all if someone wanted their own room.

And I'm positive that she wasn't suggesting this arrangement would work for you or anyone else. She was saying that just because someone such as you might not be comfortable with this kind of trip, it can and does work for others.
 
I too must have my own room - I'm a sleeper, napper and not an all night party'er, I must have my space with peace and quiet. I'm okay with group reservations if I know I can commit but also OK with paying for my own room.
It does sound like B is just stirring the pot - my ladies group had a member like that, we all finally got tired of the drama and booted her out.
 
Jen, I don't care how long I have known a friend or how well everyone gets along.
I AM NOT SHARING A BED.... (a room, well maybe... a bed... NEVER)

I actually see that as an issue...
There are those out there who actually see sharing a bed, drinks/food, etc.. as a necessary 'proof of friendship'.
Like they NEED this, and will be mortally offended... (to bad if you would have to deal with offended friends and be excuded from these trips and lose friendships if you personally required a bed of your own.)
No real 'friend' would be that way.
I do not choose to be friends with anyone who has that 'need'.

There is something that I like to call reasonable personal boundaries.


Your thing about drinks and food is kind of weird? Like are you saying that if someone wanted to try your drink or have an onion ring off your appetizer plate you'd think it was offensive? I might say no, if they were sick or something but I wouldn't mind otherwise.

I don't think the hotel thing is ever a proof of friendship thing. If people get offended, it's about money pure and simple. I wouldn't share a bed either. It's something I put my foot down on especially with people I travel with regularly. The two people who truly don't like it but put up with it are cheapskates. They'd rather save the extra $20 bucks, but I just won't go if that's the case. I just want basic comfort and I plan for that from the beginning.

I don't think there's any one size fits all when it comes to girls trips. It matters a lot who is going- there's a different dynamic, and there are some people I wouldn't do a group trip together but I'll travel with each of them separately.
 
Ummmm. Jen did say that 'Most of us share beds'

And, no, I do not like the idea of sharing drinks, as in slurping after each other......
I don't really think that makes me 'weird'. Maybe you don't want what 'I' have!!!!!

Yes, I have personally known a couple of people with this 'proof of friendship' issue.

I am so happy to give you all something to flame and attack!!!! Twist words, etc....
Glad to provide some entertainment!!!!

:cool1:
 
Ummmm. Jen did say that 'Most of us share beds'

And, no, I do not like the idea of sharing drinks, as in slurping after each other......
I don't really think that makes me 'weird'. Maybe you don't want what 'I' have!!!!!

Yes, I have personally known a couple of people with this 'proof of friendship' issue.

I am so happy to give you all something to flame and attack!!!! Twist words, etc....
Glad to provide some entertainment!!!!

:cool1:

Ummmm...Jen was referring to her group of friends, not other people. I think you are the one twisting others' words.

And just because you might know some people with a supposed "proof of friendship issue" does not mean that it applies to her group of friends.
 
OP, I think "B" is our school secretary!

Many of us from school went to an AVID training conference. We got to pay the $700 for the conference ourselves as well as our hotel rooms, flights, and rental cars. The conference was by a Marriott and as I had enough points I decided to stay at the Marriott instead of the sponsoring hotel, as did two other teachers. Another teacher used the Hilton for the same reason. Free vs. another $200/night we're picking free, especially since we get to pay for everything else out of our own pockets.

Our school secretary had a fit! How dare we split up the group. Sorry, but a few of us had our spouses coming with us and they were going to sight-see and play golf while we were in the conference. No way am I sharing a room with my husband and another couple, even though we're really good friends and have vacationed together before. If we have to pay for everything, we pick where we stay.

5 years later and our "B" still holds a grudge against all of us who made our own plans.
 
OP, I think "B" is our school secretary!

Many of us from school went to an AVID training conference. We got to pay the $700 for the conference ourselves as well as our hotel rooms, flights, and rental cars. The conference was by a Marriott and as I had enough points I decided to stay at the Marriott instead of the sponsoring hotel, as did two other teachers. Another teacher used the Hilton for the same reason. Free vs. another $200/night we're picking free, especially since we get to pay for everything else out of our own pockets.

Our school secretary had a fit! How dare we split up the group. Sorry, but a few of us had our spouses coming with us and they were going to sight-see and play golf while we were in the conference. No way am I sharing a room with my husband and another couple, even though we're really good friends and have vacationed together before. If we have to pay for everything, we pick where we stay.

5 years later and our "B" still holds a grudge against all of us who made our own plans.

Makes me wonder if she was trying to get reward points for herself by booking everyone's hotel rooms.
 
Makes me wonder if she was trying to get reward points for herself by booking everyone's hotel rooms.

Nope, I'm not sure it's possible. It hasn't been when I've booked for others in the past. She may just be one of those people who is really weird about staying at convention "official" hotels. I've met a few people like that, and I've always found it really strange. It's almost never a better deal and rarely makes sense proximity wise because I leave conventions to eat usually anyway. But some people get really upset over it.
 

GET A DISNEY VACATION QUOTE

Dreams Unlimited Travel is committed to providing you with the very best vacation planning experience possible. Our Vacation Planners are experts and will share their honest advice to help you have a magical vacation.

Let us help you with your next Disney Vacation!





Top