Godparents Role

[marthachick]

We are not Catholic. DS and his fiancee have been asked to be godparents for their friend's baby. They were told that when she goes into labor, they have to go to the hospital immediately. This is okay if it's on the weekend I guess but DS is a paramedic and FDIL is a dental assistant, so they can't just leave work at a moments notice. I think it's a lot to ask of a young couple who needs to work. I think getting to the hospital as soon as possible after the baby is born should be sufficient. The couple expecting the baby have another child and it's godparents are someone else if that matters. I realize it it totally none of my business but I was wondering if anyone else had heard of this or what everyone's take on it is.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

I always thought a godparents role was to take care of the child if they became on orphan, honestly. Never heard of going to the hospital during labor.

I was raised Catholic (currently Baptist) but never really knew what the role of a godparent was in the Catholic faith.

 

[soccerdad72]

As a Catholic, the official responsibilities of a godparent is to help raise the child according to the Catholic faith. The more realistic version these days is purely as a symbolic gesture.

Either way, there really is no requirement that godparents are at the hospital for the delivery of the baby.

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

I always thought a godparents role was to take care of the child if they became on orphan, honestly. Never heard of going to the hospital during labor.

I was raised Catholic (currently Baptist) but never really knew what the role of a godparent was in the Catholic faith.

Beat me to it

 

[quandrea]

This sounds strange. I am a catholic and being at the hospital is not a requirement of the godparents. Godparents’ role is to provide spiritual support to the child as he or she grows. They are supposed to help the parents raise the child in the faith. So that might be attend church, discuss ethics and morals, be a sounding board for the child with life’s problems. Assist the child at first communion.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

As with everything, I guess the role is dependent on the church, the family traditions, the culture, etc:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godparent

 

[marthachick]

Thanks for your speedy replies! I always thought the role was to raise the child(ren) in the death of the parents also. And another weird thing is, they're different denominations so it's not about raising the child in their chosen faith. I think it's more a symbolic thing maybe? FDIL was the one who told me about being at the hospital and when I asked DS about it and he didn't know anything about it.

 

[GreatLakes]

It is generally totally symbolic at this point but the only requirement is really you are there at the baptism. Some parishes are strict and all Godparents have to be Catholic (assuming a Catholic baby), others less strict.

The only reason I can think of needing the Godparents at the birth is in the case of some medical problem they can have the hospital's priest quickly baptize the baby to remove original sin from them. If you believe in such a thing I understand wanting the hasty baptism but a Godparent isn't a necessity in such a circumstance. I can't see even the strictest of priests withholding baptism from a dying newborn because there is no Godparent present.

I'm also no longer Catholic and don't remember if the sacrament of Last Rights can take the place of the baptism in that scenario.

 

[marthachick]

As with everything, I guess the role is dependent on the church, the family traditions, the culture, etc:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godparent

This is true.

It is generally totally symbolic at this point but the only requirement is really you are there at the baptism. Some parishes are strict and all Godparents have to be Catholic (assuming a Catholic baby), others less strict.

The only reason I can think of needing the Godparents at the birth is in the case of some medical problem they can have the hospital's priest quickly baptize the baby to remove original sin from them. If you believe in such a thing I understand wanting the hasty baptism but a Godparent isn't a necessity in such a circumstance. I can't see even the strictest of priests withholding baptism from a dying newborn because there is no Godparent present.

I'm also no longer Catholic and don't remember if the sacrament of Last Rights can take the place of the baptism in that scenario.

Neither of the couples is Catholic and as far as everyone knows, the baby is perfectly healthy.

 

[MaggieBags]

I am Catholic - I've never heard of this. Sounds like a personal request by the parents-to-be, not an official Godparent duty required by the church.

 

[mjkacmom]

It’s more of a symbolic role, no need to be at the hospital or raise the kid (my kid# have different godparents so I don’t know how that would work). Make sure the couple finds out if the godparents need to be Catholic (ours has to show proof).

 

[GreatLakes]

Neither of the couples is Catholic and as far as everyone knows, the baby is perfectly healthy.

Then I am not sure. Now, for your second sentence, anything can happen at birth. I know someone that had a perfectly healthy pregnancy but still lost the baby within minutes of birth.

 

[quandrea]

People keep saying it is a symbolic role, but that isn’t true. As godparent, you are supposed to be a believer and active in the faith. If you don’t meet that criteria, you are an unsuitable choice for godparent. I’m referring to the catholic faith. Not sure about other denominations.

 

[marthachick]

Now, for your second sentence, anything can happen at birth. I know someone that had a perfectly healthy pregnancy but still lost the baby within minutes of birth.

I completely understand this. That's why I said "as far as everyone knows..." Thanks for the insight though.

 

[soccerdad72]

People keep saying it is a symbolic role, but that isn’t true. As godparent, you are supposed to be a believer and active in the faith. If you don’t meet that criteria, you are an unsuitable choice for godparent. I’m referring to the catholic faith. Not sure about other denominations.

Per the letter of the law as far as the Catholic Church goes, sure. Reality is, these days it really is more symbolic. And in the case of the OP, it really sounds that this is the case.

 

[marthachick]

It’s more of a symbolic role, no need to be at the hospital or raise the kid (my kid# have different godparents so I don’t know how that would work). Make sure the couple finds out if the godparents need to be Catholic (ours has to show proof).

The parents are not Catholic.

 

[Hikergirl]

Going to the hospital immediately is not a requirement for being a Godparent. Going to the hospital at all isn't required.
Dh and I are Godparents to our friends' 3 kids, it is purely symbolic as we are also named as their legal guardians in case anything happens to our friends. They are not Catholic.
Only 2 of my kid's have Godparents (we were Catholic), 1 of them was not baptized so they don't have any.
There was never any requirement by the Church for them to be at the births. They came to the hospital to visit but that is because they are family and wanted to be there not because they had to be.

 

[barkley]

the expectations are so across the board on this i almost think anyone asked to do so should approach it like when being asked to be an attendant in a wedding-ask what the expectations/duties are before making a decision on accepting/declining.

i grew up catholic, and we were taught the spiritual support aspect. this was the same when later in life i attended a lutheran church. that said-i know people of many different faiths and some that are not religious in the least who assign 'godparents' with wildly different expectations. some believe that the godparent is agreeing to become the default parent in the event of the death of the bio parents (beyond the legalities i've never figured out how that works when they pick 2 people not married/totally unrelated to each other/in some cases total strangers to each other), with others there's the expectation of some significant financial support for certain 'big days' in the child's life (had a friend who lost a good friendship b/c she became a godparent based on her expectations/understanding and then there was a HUGE amount of insult/anger when she didn't come up with a very expensive gift AND a massive amount of money to 'reimburse' throwing some kind of big event for one of the kid's milestones-she had no idea her friend's extended family/community tradition was that taking on a godparent role entailed TREMENDOUS financial obligations (in both their defenses-it was something that wasn't talked about/unspoken but known in that community so it never occurred to the new parents that the person(s) outside their community that they asked had no clue when they accepted).

 

[Pea-n-Me]

As a Catholic, the official responsibilities of a godparent is to help raise the child according to the Catholic faith. The more realistic version these days is purely as a symbolic gesture.

Either way, there really is no requirement that godparents are at the hospital for the delivery of the baby.

People keep saying it is a symbolic role, but that isn’t true. As godparent, you are supposed to be a believer and active in the faith. If you don’t meet that criteria, you are an unsuitable choice for godparent. I’m referring to the catholic faith. Not sure about other denominations.

These, mostly.

The parents are not Catholic.

Then the above don't apply. Do they even have a religious denomination?

 

[morgan98]

I was born and raised Catholic, but do not practice. I have Godparents and they were chosen because they were a believer and active in the Catholic faith. To be a bit of a spiritual leader, so to speak. However, I honestly saw it as symbolic because I cannot say I have ever gone to them with any sort of deeply religious issues.

Never have I heard about having to be at the hospital and my parents had arrangements for who would raise us should something happen to them. It was not our Godparents. My brother and I each have different Godparents. My aunt would have raised us. Come to think of it, she is my brother's Godmother, but that is not the reason she was his Godmother.