Groomsman threatening to drop out 4 days before wedding... advice???


Earning My Ears
Mar 11, 2019
I just wanted to chime in here - we had TWO groomsmen not show up to our wedding, and it wasn't even a destination wedding. We got married 40 minutes from our hometown. When my husband called them the morning of, they were like "ah, yeah, man, couldn't get off work." I had suspected the evening before they wouldn't be there, though, because they didn't show up to the rehearsal dinner, and after the dinner I called the tux shop to find they'd never picked up their tuxes, either. But they did not actually tell us until the day of.

I will say that one of them, we never talked to again. To be honest, nearly twelve years later, I had to think very hard to even remember his name. The other we didn't see or hear from for many, many years after, and now, the only time we do see him is in passing at conventions every once in a while. Clearly, we didn't really need either of them.


DIS Veteran
Feb 17, 2018
Wow, these stories are unbelievable. I am so glad that my hubby and I just went to the courthouse and got hitched. I can't imagine going through all of the hassle of planning a wedding and dealing with the other people. We saved the money and went on a nice honeymoon instead. Plus we just felt like it was something private between the 2 of us, that we were starting this life together. I know that most don't feel this way, but it sure is crazy hearing these stories.


DIS Veteran
Jun 29, 2017
My DD and I have had multiple conversations about her friends and those that she could really count on to be in her destination wedding one day. It’s a huge financial and time commitment. She could easily have 10 bridesmaids. Really the only friends that I expect to be there are her “ride or die” friends. That lowers the number significantly. Right now I can only see 3 actually following through.

It’s really important to have a serious conversation with people that you want in your wedding party. We live in the northeast, so we are talking plane fare, hotel, meals, park tickets, in addition to the gown/tux. (She will not expect gifts from them. Their presence is their gift.) Since this will be a big deal, any members of the wedding party will really need to be sure that they can get the time off and be able to afford being in a destination wedding in WDW.

If not, speak now or forever hold your peace.


Disney News and Updates

Get Daily Email Updates