3Gsandme
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Jan 18, 2013
I lost my daughter in a house fire. She was also 7. You do the only thing you can do. Take it day by day and sometimes second by second. I have been broken down that low. Life can still be good though. It will never be the same, but there is still some happiness on this journey.
I'm so sorry for their loss and it's affect on you as well.
I'm just handing out hugs and I wish I could actually give you all one, even though it would be awkward because you don't know me.
You crawl into your bed and don't get out or you just keep putting one foot in front of the other...everyone else moves on with their lives. The world keeps turning and you remain frozen in time.
I had to bury my first child just a little before his first birthday due to a misdiagnosed intestinal defect. That was 16 years ago. I honestly don't know how I made it. I remember the deafening sounds of my own internal screams. I remember wanting to run. Forever and ever until my body just gave out. I remember being so tired but being unable to let myself fall asleep. My dreams of him were vivid and real and I was continuously trying to save him.
It's more horrifying than you could ever imagine and there's more that I could never put into words. I know it's not something I could ever do again. I've learned to build walls around those memories to protect myself and carry on with life but every now and then I take the walls down and let the flood hit me. So I don't forget.
The good news is it's possible to make it out of that nightmare and have a good life. It's just a hard road and you have to work to keep moving in a positive direction.