It Feels Awkward Even Having to Ask This....

DantePD

Mouseketeer
Joined
Jun 15, 2016
So, my husband and I are going to WDW the first week in December and we're obviously excited...but now, it's kind of colored by the events of the last week.

My husband is needless to say, freaked out and a little scared because of the attack at Pulse. (I'm law enforcement, I understand that the odds of this happening in a Disney are extremely small.) So, I'm trying to find something to assuage his fears some.

Has anyone here in the LGBT community (or allies) had a bad experience being gay at Disney? Things like PDAs (I'm talking holding hands, a kiss, etc. Not a makeout session) and the like. Has anyone had other guests or staff react poorly to us being Out at Disney?

God, I hate that I even have to ask this.
 
I have never witnessed a bad experience but I can't say that it has never happened. Part of Disney is the fact you can be who you are there.

I'll share this from Sam Brinton which is a facebook message he got after wearing heals to Epcot from a mom of a little boy.

“When my gay son saw you walk by he just sat down and started to cry a little, I was so confused! But then he whimpered ‘It’s true, Mom. WE can be our own princess here.’ And I just started crying too and realized you made my son’s dream come true. – A Mom.”

As an ally it breaks my heart to know that you even have to ask. Please know that your small normal gestures of affection might just show some little boy or girl that it is okay to hold hands, hug, and kiss when they may struggle at home to know that is okay if they are LGBT.
 
I was a CM for 4 months and never witnessed anything. Honestly if anything, I think people are feeling very sympathetic towards the LGBT community and might even say something in support.
 


We've never had a bad experience from a guest or CM at any Disney park. We did have one CM at WDW ask me "where is your better half?" while waiting for a bus when we were there for our engagement trip while wearing our just engaged buttons and shirts and standing right next to each other. When I pointed at my wife (then fiancée) and said "right here" he immediately apologized.

We've only ever had amazing experiences from other guests and CMs other than that. During our engagement trip we were congratulated by multiple guests, including families with young children. After our in-park shoot at DL the morning after our wedding, one guest approached us and told us how he and his young daughter saw us having our pictures taken at the front of the park that morning and his daughter exclaimed to him "look two princesses!!" and that it totally made her day and his. We've also been approached by guests and told how happy it makes them to see us "out and proud." CMs have always made our celebrations extra special with pixie dust and congratulations.

While it is impossible to say you will never encounter any negativity at Disney, the reality is the vast majority of guests and CMs are going to approach you and speak to you in a positive manner rather than negative one if they say/do anything at all.
 
So, my husband and I are going to WDW the first week in December and we're obviously excited...but now, it's kind of colored by the events of the last week.

My husband is needless to say, freaked out and a little scared because of the attack at Pulse. (I'm law enforcement, I understand that the odds of this happening in a Disney are extremely small.) So, I'm trying to find something to assuage his fears some.

Has anyone here in the LGBT community (or allies) had a bad experience being gay at Disney? Things like PDAs (I'm talking holding hands, a kiss, etc. Not a makeout session) and the like. Has anyone had other guests or staff react poorly to us being Out at Disney?

God, I hate that I even have to ask this.

We have never had any negative experiences in WDW. We are pretty conservative in public but for Halloween we have worn football jerseys that show "Together Since 1994" and gotten lots of positive feed back from strangers. We've also had CM ask for photos with us while wearing them. We normally travel during our anniversary and many CM and guest show support while we are wearing our badges. I'm sure there will be people that have issues but they don't speak up to us. Have an awesome trip and let Disney give you more acceptance then you have ever felt.
 
So, my husband and I are going to WDW the first week in December and we're obviously excited...but now, it's kind of colored by the events of the last week.

My husband is needless to say, freaked out and a little scared because of the attack at Pulse. (I'm law enforcement, I understand that the odds of this happening in a Disney are extremely small.) So, I'm trying to find something to assuage his fears some.

Has anyone here in the LGBT community (or allies) had a bad experience being gay at Disney? Things like PDAs (I'm talking holding hands, a kiss, etc. Not a makeout session) and the like. Has anyone had other guests or staff react poorly to us being Out at Disney?

God, I hate that I even have to ask this.

Disney is a tolerant place. Definitely, you will get no pushback from staff for PDA's. No one can 100% guarantee that you won't run into the odd intolerant fellow guest, but I've never seen anything like that happen in several trips.
 


i never saw anything negative while we were there, and i saw other same-sex guests holding hands multiple times. in very long line ups at times. PDAs are gross, no matter who does it but to be honest, i never even saw anyone do a double take at people holding hands.
(as it should be....really)
 
So, my husband and I are going to WDW the first week in December and we're obviously excited...but now, it's kind of colored by the events of the last week.

My husband is needless to say, freaked out and a little scared because of the attack at Pulse. (I'm law enforcement, I understand that the odds of this happening in a Disney are extremely small.) So, I'm trying to find something to assuage his fears some.

Has anyone here in the LGBT community (or allies) had a bad experience being gay at Disney? Things like PDAs (I'm talking holding hands, a kiss, etc. Not a makeout session) and the like. Has anyone had other guests or staff react poorly to us being Out at Disney?

God, I hate that I even have to ask this.
Our experiences have been 99.99% positive.

One time a Photopass CM at TL who was stationed in the lazy river was taking everyone's picture as they floated past, and scanned their magic bands. My partner and I were already holding hands, we smiled at the camera... and he put his camera down. Not to change the sd card or check something, he was simply refused to take our picture. And after we were out of range, he picked it back up and started taking pics again. You can bet we made note of the time and a physical description of the CM and wrote a letter. (Disney made very good in their apology for the situation.)

Other than that ugliness, we have never had a problem with CMs or fellow guests. We've gotten special greetings from both CMs and guests when we've worn Anniversary buttons, called out for our matching outfits in a very playful and inclusive way during the Monsters Inc. Laugh Floor show, and even Mickey wished us Happy Anniversary and talked to us about our relationship during a meet and greet.

I get your partner's concern, it comes back for me just a little bit every time my partner and I go there together. Please let him know that it's a whole lot better at Disney than lots of other places. Have fun on your trip!
 
From my perspective...as a straight single mom who was with her DD8 just last week at Disney.. We were browsing ....we witnessed/ overheard 2 males in a shop getting a speciality photo taken ..they were obviously excited...hugged..held hands and one of them said " this is for starting our new life together/ new beginnings"....my DD8 ( nosey as heck) turned to them and said "cool picture" they thanked her and we moved on...
My point....no one paid any attention to them except my nosy DD and that was to simply comment on their picture and beg to get one too.. The CM cashing them out did not act any different.
I don't think you have anything to worry about...Disney is a great place to be yourself...
 
I am not gay. But I would have a big problem if I saw anyone being treated badly for what ever reason. I just really hate to see anyone treated badly and If I saw it I would take issue with it. People should be treated with respect who ever they are. My 2 cents.
 
So, my husband and I are going to WDW the first week in December and we're obviously excited...but now, it's kind of colored by the events of the last week.

My husband is needless to say, freaked out and a little scared because of the attack at Pulse. (I'm law enforcement, I understand that the odds of this happening in a Disney are extremely small.) So, I'm trying to find something to assuage his fears some.
Has anyone here in the LGBT community (or allies) had a bad experience being gay at Disney? Things like PDAs (I'm talking holding hands, a kiss, etc. Not a makeout session) and the like. Has anyone had other guests or staff react poorly to us being Out at Disney?
God, I hate that I even have to ask this.

Take it you never attended "Gay Days @ Disney" It is a major (unofficial) week long event that brings thousands of Gay/Lads & Lasses from around the world. Straight Parents with Gay Kids, Gay Parents with their kids. It is an amazing event. for the most part, aside from a few "dim" / narrow minded people, You and your Husband are Warmly Welcomed :welcome: at the Happiest place on the east coast.
I hate to write it, but the world is not fair. When straight couples engage in the "over the top" or "hand up underneath HER t-shirt public displays of affection, while in the Hunted Mansion queue, most park guests won't bat an eye. If it really gets out of control (PG-13/R :sad2: ), then a Disney Cast Member WILL say something, "Get a room, here at Disney world we have over 24,000 of them." LOL When a gay couple exchange simple public display of affection ( peck on the cheek or a hand holding), slight chance you might get an eye roll, but but for the most part, you and your Husband will be fine. Heck if I see Straight OR Gay couple really going for the gold- the crotch groping/ breast fondling (cue the Barry White or Marvin Gaye (w/ Tammy Terrell ""You're All I Need to Get By" music) 'cause we got a couple about to make a baby while in the queue for "Pirates of the Caribbean"pirate:, then I might even say something. After all it is a family park! :rainbow: see what I did there? Rainbow family.

Being rational, I think your husband has two completely different sets of fears;
1) the fear you & he will be run out of the Magic Kingdom by hoards of angry guests (with pitch forks and torches) because you held hands.
2) the fear of terrorist acts affecting large numbers of guests, regardless of sexual orientation.

Relax, and enjoy yourselves.
 
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It's not WDW, but I was at Disneyland LA for four days around four weeks ago. My husband and I don't do PDAs. It's just not something either of us is comfortable with at home (in Australia), so it's not something we would do when on holiday. BUT, I was extremely, pleasantly surprised to see how many gay and lesbian couples openly engaged in PDAs with absolutely no adverse or negative consequences. And the range of PDAs was pretty broad, from simply wearing matching "bride" ears to neck nuzzling and somewhat heavy petting.

I found it all to be pretty amazing, although much like any public displays of affection (i.e. straight or otherwise), the more ... intimate kind did seem better suited for a private as opposed to public space.
 
Our experiences have been 99.99% positive.

One time a Photopass CM at TL who was stationed in the lazy river was taking everyone's picture as they floated past, and scanned their magic bands. My partner and I were already holding hands, we smiled at the camera... and he put his camera down. Not to change the sd card or check something, he was simply refused to take our picture. And after we were out of range, he picked it back up and started taking pics again. You can bet we made note of the time and a physical description of the CM and wrote a letter. (Disney made very good in their apology for the situation.)

Other than that ugliness, we have never had a problem with CMs or fellow guests. We've gotten special greetings from both CMs and guests when we've worn Anniversary buttons, called out for our matching outfits in a very playful and inclusive way during the Monsters Inc. Laugh Floor show, and even Mickey wished us Happy Anniversary and talked to us about our relationship during a meet and greet.

I get your partner's concern, it comes back for me just a little bit every time my partner and I go there together. Please let him know that it's a whole lot better at Disney than lots of other places. Have fun on your trip!

So glad you reported that CM. I believe everyone can have their own thoughts and beliefes but once you clock in for work your bias should go away. Once you clock in at Disney it is about making every guest have the best day no matter the race, creed, religion, or orientation.
 
Me and my GF have never had any problems. You're just another face in a crowd that seems endless so it's hard to draw much attention anyway unless you're being obnoxiously affectionate in a long line. That is just plain annoying no matter who does it but kissy faced teenagers are by far the worst and least disciplined about acting appropriately. They'll slobber all over each other in the most sickening fashion. Sorry about the tangent. You'll both be fine, have a fun trip!
 
From a straight conservative mom with a young child, I say BE YOURSELF and ENJOY YOURSELF !!!!! We have been once during Gay Days when my stepdaughter was 4 1/2 years old. She and I were riding the monorail back from Epcot one day in a sea of red shirts..... (my husband was back at the room napping) So she says to me, "we picked the wrong shirts today, we were supposed to wear red!". Well, who knew ? :) She saw two men kissing and quietly told me they were kissing, and I told her, "well Disney is the Happiest Place on Earth, you can do anything you want here that makes you happy". And she thought that was pretty good. My point is, people are people and you have as much right to show affection as anyone else. You have the right to show your love as much as anyone. Just have fun. Like my mom always told us as kids, people are more worried about someone else is thinking about them than they are about what someone else is doing, so just enjoy your life. You're only given one. :love:
 
In all my visits to Florida, California, Paris and Tokyo, I have never ever experienced any remote type of uncomfortable behaviour. That's not to say it doesn't happen, but I've never received it or witnessed it done to someone else. And I've seen many gay couples just casually holding hands (as it should be - casual) and just going about their business.

I've only heard ONE bad comment which enraged me though. On the day of the Orlando shooting, I went to Hollywood Studios and I was on my own. Behind me was a family of 4, speaking both Spanish and English. I speak both so I could understand what they were saying. In English they were talking about waiting for the Little Mermaid show to start soon (we were in the queue), but in Spanish the mother said to her little ~2 year old: "stop hugging your brother so much! machos shouldn't be touching other machos, it's not natural".

This is on the frickin' day that 49 people got killed for being gay! It took a lot of strength not to turn around and call her homophobic crap out. But out of politeness for all the little kids around and for the atmosphere of other playful families around, I let it go. Homophobia is learned, not innate.

This was ONE case out of hundreds of very accommodating guests and cast members who have even celebrated me and my partner just for holding hands and stuff. Just be yourself - and if you happen to come across any crap, rise above it! you're much better than those people who have nothing but hate and, frankly, jealousy for your happiness.
 
I'm sure you both know that you run into the wildly intolerant anywhere. But Disney is better than anywhere else. Most of the CMs are open minded and supportive, or at least leave their opinions at the door. And as far as other guests, 99.9% are so involved in their own vacation they won't even notice you.
 

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