legal seperation?

[hauntedmansion]

I hope this is okay to post on this board. My husband of 7 years left me for another woman (think he has been seeing her off and on for 3 years) of course he blames me! We have been together for 20 years. I live in MA. does anyone know how to go about getting a legal seperation? I figure this is the first step.(well actually the first step was having him move out) I don't have the funds right now for a divorce. We don't own a home or have any children. I told him to take whatever he wanted from the house,didn't care to argue about material things(its not who I am) any help would be appriciated.
Thanks

 

[mom+3girls]

try calling around and see if there are any attorneys in your area that do free consultations.
You might get many of your questions answered by doing that.
You might even try calling Legal Aide.

I can understand how you must be feeling right now my ex left me after 12 years of marriage and 3 children ages 12,7 and 5 at the time, for a girl that was 14 years younger than he is, she stayed with him long enough for him to pay for a trip to Disney and then she said this isn't going to work out. He wanted to come home after that but I wouldn't let him. I had found out that he had been seeing others all through our marriage.
We are now divorced and my life is so much better without him.

Good Luck

 

[Mackey Mouse]

I am just thinking out loud here... first of all, it is fine to ask that question on this board, we are here to help anyone cope and we do have compassion for all..

I see that you are from where I use to live before I moved, why not contact the Chamber of Commerce of your town and start there to see if there are any lawyers to may do pro bono work in town......I would see if maybe you could get some information about filing for a legal separation and just live your life apart until you can get the divorce....there aren't any children to support and no house to divide....

I wish I knew more about the law, but we are here for you and hopefully someone else may have more answers..

 

[crazyme5kids]

How about a divorce mediator? They are much, much cheaper than a lawyer.

 

[JandJ]

Some states do not do "legal" separations, you just separate physically (by you or him moving out) and then get a divorce. Some states have a waiting period before you can file for divorce. You should be able to find out all of the legal stuff on your state's government website. Look at government websites, not lawyer's websites, because in some states you can just file paperwork and pay a fee and not even need a lawyer. A lawyer's website is just going to try to sell you on their services. My friend got divorced quickly and pretty easily in FL (well, not easily emotionally). They also did not have kids and didn't own a house. She just filed the paperwork and went to court, no lawyer and her ex didn't even show up at the court date. The judge asked why she wanted to get divorced, she told him, presented the paperwork they filled out, and that was that - divorce granted in 30 minutes. I think it was less than $900.

Good luck to you. And I'm so sorry you have been treated so badly by someone you've been with 20 years

 

[cyndibelle]

I am sorry for your situation...It is true that you must check in your state to see about legal separations...I live in Ohio and my husband and i are dissolving our marriage..That is the way to go if you can agree upon everything..it takes less time and less money...Good for you for caring enough about yourself to tell him to go and take what he wanted...As you know you cant make someone stay if they dont want too....You sound like a strong individual and in the end when you look back on all of this..it will make you an even stronger person. .... I know that you can also go to places like staples...office max etc and they actually have booklets that you can fill out and file on your own and it is very inexpensive..good luck!!!

 

[jann1033]

this is ohio also...daughter is getting divorced and cause her husband filed the wrong kind of divorce ( did it behind her back. she didn't know til it was filed and she found the bill for it) , technically it's a law suit and will cost at least 2500...so if you are sure you might want to file a dissolution...much cheaper but if husband files the other you have no recourse and can't change it

 

[rie'smom]

Sometimes divorce really is a blessing in disguise. I was devastated when my 1st husband and I divorced but a couple of years later I met my DH. He is the most wonderful person. The great thing is after a fonky marriage,you really appreciate a good one.

 

[kathleena]

So sorry that you have to go through this. Keep focused on the future and how things will be better a year from now.

Do you have an EAP program through your work? I would call them for help.

 

[s&k'smom]

I don't mean to sound cold but after 20 years you deserve something. In Mass you are entitled to half of everything. Take it. You may not want it but invest in your retirement or a new home. Good luck and take care.