Marie Kondo - Anyone want to discuss?

[jaybirdsmommy]

I do like the way she categorizes things to go through - ie clothes all at once, books all at once, etc. Instead of going through one room at a time, I think i would be much more efficient to do all of one type of thing at a time. Although I like the idea, I know how my brain works. I'm worried that if I piled all our books up (and believe me, we have a LOT of books), then my brain would do what it normally does when confronted with a mess. Shut down and say "nope, nap time." Then, we'd have a mountain of book in the living room for weeks.

Also, I don't see how it would work if everyone in the household wasn't on board. A good portion of the stuff in my house belongs to my husband and kids. I can't declutter their stuff. It doesn't belong to me and I can't just pitch it.

I also agree that the "spark joy" idea should be taken with a grain of salt. There are many things in my house that definitely don't spark joy but I have to have them. I hate to cook. There is nothing in my kitchen that even remotely brings me joy. I can't get rid of it all, I need my pots and pans. Although, since I do hate to cook, I definitely don't have more kitchen stuff than I need so maybe it all balances out.

 

[portocall]

I watched it. Motivational wise, it really didn't do much for me. My problem is time. If I make a huge pile, when will I have time and energy to get through it? The answer is not right now. But in all truth, we currently have two complete households in two states and we will be going back to one in a few months. So just about everything will have to go. But even though I am married I am single mothering it while working full time for now. Teenagers tend to be busy people. I'm busy. The weekends are a blur and I'm struggling with finding time to do what needs to get done. With that, there isn't a television show that will help me so not a dig at this one.

Thankfully I don't have strong attachments to my things. I do like the premise that whatever I do decide to bring with me should be the things I treasure most.

 

[PlaneJoy1]

I've recently (like this week) watched a few episodes. I do like her method of folding and plan to try it this weekend if I have the time. We just moved, so there are boxes to go through with old stuff that's been in storage for a couple of years while we went through the process of finding/building a house. I hope to try her "spark joy" method to see if I can decide what to keep and what not to.

 

[VandVsmama]

I binge watched it over a couple of evenings recently. I enjoyed it. Enjoyed it enough that over last weekend, I refolded everything in my & DH's dressers. Thank goodness because now we can see all of the shirts, shorts, etc. that we have. Everything used to be kind of thrown in with no organization at all. I didn't put everything on the bed like she does in the TV show. DH is already a happy camper because it's now so much easier to see what t-shirts he has. Folding the stuff was really simple and not complicated. Now I know how to pack better when we go on a family trip!

I'll eventually get to going through stuff in the garage...that will be a bit of a task.

We moved about a year ago to a different city. Sold our house and all that. In the months leading up to that, though, it was rough because we'd been in the house for 13 years and had a mountain of stuff to sort through. We had a pretty epic garage sale. Probably sold 1000 DVDs. Got rid of a ton of junk computer parts, cables, etc. You should have been the amount of kitchen stuff we had to get rid of....at one point, we had 3 crockpots. Trust me, we didn't need 3. We just needed 1. DH had this huge emotional attachment to all of that kitchen stuff. But nobody needs 4 blenders. You just need 1. All of the extra kitchen stuff completely filled our big dining room table.

But it was totally worth doing all of that because it was necessary. We were temporarily moving down from a 2000 sq ft home into a 1000 sq ft apartment before we found a house to purchase in our new location. There was no room for 3 crockpots and 4 blenders.

 

[Wishing on a star]

As a person who does not need all those piles of junk, who is married to the son of a 'hoarder'....
I just LOVE the idea... I could do it. I could live by it.

PS: if something doesn't fit, or if I haven't worn it in a year, generally, NOPE, it doesn't bring me joy.
I don't think one should take this as purely Black And White... As 'commands'.
That doesn't mean that I don't have my wedding dress, or a couple of bins of my son's special clothes, keepsakes, etc...

I think one's take on this is whether one actually understands joy, and how some objects can bring joy.
Or if one sees objects as possessions that should be kept, and just not discarded. Because they have value, just based on their worth as possessions.
'Possessions' in of themselves, mean nothing to me.

 

[AndreaDM]

The thing with the folding is, I could go through all my drawers and fold everything that way and it would look great. That is, until the next time I do laundry and I'm in a hurry. You can bet I'll be folding the "old way" and tossing those shirts on top of the the upright folded ones. I can't sustain doing it that way.

We don't have a lot of clutter at all, fiance grew up as an Army kid and then was in the Navy himself so he learned to only keep what he really wanted/needed. Having done 2 moves in less than 3 years has really forced me to pare down a lot of excess as well. Like a pp stated, until people stop BUYING/ACCUMULATING so much crap, nothing will change. My downfall was hunting the Target clearance shelves but stopped that when I realized I had stuff with tags on it that I ended up donating during one of my moves.

 

[neverlandsky]

2 episodes in and there's no way I can fold like that or prop stuff up in drawers like that. Reminds me of those bento boxes parents did for their kids that I wouldn't or couldn't do. I do the boxes in drawers already. I got that tip from Martha Stewart. Love the "spark joy" approach. Our Christmas is only 2 totes. Started watching the downsizing episode, I like it so far.

 

[Malyficent]

I loved how she described "spark joy" as that fizzy feeling you get that rises up inside you. I can feel a purge/deep cleaning coming on soon - these tend to build up with me. I think I'm reiterating what someone said upthread but being intentional about what I buy is now something I center. It's very hard with the children as they just want.all.the.crap. but I'm trying to get them to understand that if we don't spend money on junk we can do things like go to Disney more often.

I'm going to try to get my husband to watch an episode with me to see if it can inspire him to let go of stuff. I recently found a bag of his old (but great quality and still current style) work shirts from 2010 when he was a bit bigger. Those could have gone to a charity and blessed someone else years ago.

 

[Gorechick]

I started to watch the first episode and I couldn't get past the lady who had to hire someone to do their laundry.

 

[PollyannaMom]

...It's very hard with the children as they just want.all.the.crap. but I'm trying to get them to understand that if we don't spend money on junk we can do things like go to Disney more often.

When you don't buy something, write down the amount (or snap a pic of the price tag on your phone) and actually put the money in a clear bank* at home so they can watch it grow.

* Shadow boxes are cool, because you use a Disney pic or park map as the background, but a spaghetti sauce jar from the recycle bin works fine!

 

[runwad]

I only watched the first episode. I've already been working on decluttering. I don't have a problem getting rid of things, in fact, my late mother went around putting tags and little descriptions on valuables because she said I would just come through and throw everything away.

What my problem is, and I'm trying to work through it, is keeping things thinking my soon to be launched kids will need/want it. But you know what, they won't. They aren't like we were, we loved getting all of grandmas household furniture and hand me downs when we were starting out so we didn't have to buy stuff with $$ we didn't have. But not these kids, they don't want things that aren't in style or old.

So I've been making progress, I got rid of a bunch of old Christmas decor that I don't use, no longer saving for them. And next I have to go through all my old wall decor, that's going to be donated too. Nobody wants old home interiors, it's not in style, so off it will go, but I will admit I'm having a hard time actually doing it for fear someone "might" want it someday. But I'm determined to get rid of it.

 

[bananasplitkids]

I read her book about 2 years ago and it did motivate me to start decluttering back then. I love to shop so I go through the decluttering phase about once a year. I also used her folding method for clothes and have kept up with it for the last 2 years. In the beginning, it was hard for me to make this a new habit, but you just have to continue pushing.

 

[torene03]

So I read her book a year or so ago, and just discovered her TV show and have been watching off and on this past week. As I recall, some things from her book really didn’t resonate with me (I’m not super concerned with the emotional state of my socks), but I did take 2 things to use regularly. One is to have things open and displayed as opposed to hidden in a drawer and I do fold clothes upright now. The second was how to let go of something and not feel guilted into keeping it. I’m a “just in case” and “maybe someday” person, and I could rationalize keeping everything that way. Her idea that even if you can’t fit into clothing or that you bought something and never used it, you thank the item for serving its purpose and let it go was very freeing for me. This has come in handy recently as I just bought a house, and I’d like to stop moving things that I don’t or won’t use anymore.

 

[neverlandsky]

Finished the whole season. Cried with Margie. Loved the Downsizing, Margie, & the Expecting Couple episodes. Those episodes to me had the most growth. Going to declutter more and be intentional going forward. Basically I want to continue living with less and experience more. That’s my take away.

 

[tcufrog]

Her philosophy just doesn't resonate with me. The whole joy thing doesn't work for me and I hate folding things. I hang up most of our clothes because I don't trust my kids to take a folded shirt out of a drawer, change their mind and then put it back properly folded. I hang up all of our clothes except pjs, socks and underwear. All of those get thrown in their respective drawers. That works well for us.

 

[jaybirdsmommy]

I only watched the first episode. I've already been working on decluttering. I don't have a problem getting rid of things, in fact, my late mother went around putting tags and little descriptions on valuables because she said I would just come through and throw everything away.

What my problem is, and I'm trying to work through it, is keeping things thinking my soon to be launched kids will need/want it. But you know what, they won't. They aren't like we were, we loved getting all of grandmas household furniture and hand me downs when we were starting out so we didn't have to buy stuff with $$ we didn't have. But not these kids, they don't want things that aren't in style or old.

So I've been making progress, I got rid of a bunch of old Christmas decor that I don't use, no longer saving for them. And next I have to go through all my old wall decor, that's going to be donated too. Nobody wants old home interiors, it's not in style, so off it will go, but I will admit I'm having a hard time actually doing it for fear someone "might" want it someday. But I'm determined to get rid of it.

For years, this is how my parents would get rid of their stuff. It got so bad that every time I visited I had to lock my car doors and put the keys in my pockets or else I'd find all kinds of junk hidden in my car when I got home.

I think a lot like you do as well, I "might" need it some day. Of all the things I've ever donated or gotten rid of, I might have actually wished I had 1 or 2 items back. That's it. So, I remind myself of this when I find myself thinking that way.

 

[jaybirdsmommy]

I started to watch the first episode and I couldn't get past the lady who had to hire someone to do their laundry.

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/...QJm_nnfoX4FQRsknWeyLcAOILhGrmuSbiuTuqcmCWCFfo

Hopefully the link will work, I thought this article was interesting and it specifically used the laundry helper as an example.

 

[Aimeedyan]

I haven't read her book, which I know as a ton more tips + explanations behind her method, but did enjoy watching the show. She was incredibly kind and non-judgmental, even when I was appalled at some of the people on the show

We are pretty anti-clutter anyways, and I have been purging my closet regularly due to weight loss, but I did refold my drawers and it's AMAZING how well that stand-up method works. My drawer size practically doubled and I can see everything easily!

 

[Malyficent]

When you don't buy something, write down the amount (or snap a pic of the price tag on your phone) and actually put the money in a clear bank* at home so they can watch it grow.

* Shadow boxes are cool, because you use a Disney pic or park map as the background, but a spaghetti sauce jar from the recycle bin works fine!

Whoa! I can't love this idea enough. You rock! Thanks.

 

[tzolkin]

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/...QJm_nnfoX4FQRsknWeyLcAOILhGrmuSbiuTuqcmCWCFfo

Hopefully the link will work, I thought this article was interesting and it specifically used the laundry helper as an example.

Interesting article.

I have discussed this topic quite a bit with both men and women. I even have a friend who is studying how this “mental load” (or what this author refers to as “third shift” may contribute to autoimmune diseases in women. (Some diseases are 80-90+% women.)

For those who don’t want to read the entire article this quote sums it up:
“Things are the dominion of women, and the place where these things are stored are the dominion of women too. Women store things, organize things, clean things, order things, schedule things. We not only do these chores, we keep a mental bank of what, how, and when these chores need to be done.”

The stress really isn’t in the tasks themselves, but in the complicated time-management aspect. I think this is amplified in our culture because it’s expected that everyone in the family be involved in multiple activities (and it’s usually the mom who has to remember all the details and figure out how to coordinate everything for all members of the family).