Parenting is hard..

[kimblebee]

If you're not worried about it why are asking strangers on a message board for parenting advice. Any advice your given you have an argument against. I'm not sure what answers you're looking for.

I wasn’t asking for advice. Nowhere did I ask what I should do.

 

[kimblebee]

Where did she ask for advice? I must have missed it.

You beat me to it lol

 

[kimblebee]

You are defensive. Best of luck with your daughter!

Thank you

Besides this one blip, I have had no issues.

 

[nkereina]

I'm sorry if I missed it, but what's the appeal of the stick and poke tattoo? What if you struck a deal with her to lay off those, and then when she's of age, you'll take her and pay for a tattoo of her choosing by a professional. If she brings her own in art into a tattoo shop, they will tattoo that for her as well. If she knows she's got a freebie coming and can get tatted up to her heart's content if she just waits until she's 18, perhaps that will help the desire to do this. Good luck!

 

[soccerdad72]

Thank you

Besides this one blip, I have had no issues.

So, parenting isn't that hard, then?

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I had to look these up, I'd never heard of them.

Kim, how does one become a certified tattoo artist? Maybe she can hold off on this type of thing, but you can help her get started in an actual educational program if that's something she's interested in doing as an artist?

 

[mjkacmom]

Why would she "confess" that she did them for a few friends when it was just one other person? And that other mom knew about it? What kind of mother allows this? Honestly, using needles on other humans is not normal teen stuff. I can't even imagine it.

This sounds like typical teen stuff to me, especially how easy it is to buy the kits. Tattoos, piercings, smoking, drinking, vaping... Heck, one of my HS bff’s got a tattoo of her boyfriend’s name at 17 (Harold).

 

[kimblebee]

I'm sorry if I missed it, but what's the appeal of the stick and poke tattoo? What if you struck a deal with her to lay off those, and then when she's of age, you'll take her and pay for a tattoo of her choosing by a professional. If she brings her own in art into a tattoo shop, they will tattoo that for her as well. If she knows she's got a freebie coming and can get tatted up to her heart's content if she just waits until she's 18, perhaps that will help the desire to do this. Good luck!

I have no idea what the appeal is..besides cost. Around here, it’s $120 to just sit in a tattoo artists chair..even if you want the most basic tat, you’re going to pay for it.

I had to look these up, I'd never heard of them.

Kim, how does one become a certified tattoo artist? Maybe she can hold off on this type of thing, but you can help her get started in an actual educational program if that's something she's interested in doing as an artist?

I don’t know, but I know there is certification of some type. All artists have to display their certificate and get it renewed as set out by the city.

I don’t think she wants to be an artist..I think it’s just a teenage thing to do these days.

I’m most surprised she did this because she HATES needles and blood. Every time she gets a piercing I have to go with her and hold her hand. Afterwards, she has to lie still for a while and have something to drink. She psychs herself out so much she has passed out.

 

[cruiser21]

I wasn’t asking for advice. Nowhere did I ask what I should do.

What was the purpose of the thread? To validate how you feel? I'm confused.
If I started a thread disclosing issues I was having with my teen...something I would never do by the way. Because I beliieve in protecting their privacy. I would expect to all kinds get feedback and advice otherwise what's the point.

 

[kimblebee]

What was the purpose of the thread? To validate how you feel? I'm confused.
If I started a thread disclosing issues I was having with my teen...something I would never do by the way. Because I beliieve in protecting their privacy. I would expect to all kinds get feedback and advice otherwise what's the point.

I expected people to give opinions and advice. That’s what threads are for. I didn’t ask for advice though, as I already knew how I was going to react.

Would it have been better for you if I would have added the word VENT somewhere?

I didn’t know revealing my daughter had two tattoos was going to lead someone to our door. I personally would never post pics of her in a trip report (don’t know if you have or not) but lots of people do that.

 

[cruiser21]

I expected people to give opinions and advice. That’s what threads are for. I didn’t ask for advice though, as I already knew how I was going to react.

Would it have been better for you if I would have added the word VENT somewhere?

I didn’t know revealing my daughter had two tattoos was going to lead someone to our door. I personally would never post pics of her in a trip report (don’t know if you have or not) but lots of people do that.

No I don't post pictures or names. Yes I think vent would be the correct choice of words.

 

[kimblebee]

No I don't post pictures or names. Yes I think vent would be the correct choice of words.

If you can’t detect a question from a vent, I can’t help you

 

[ronandannette]

I just wonder why she doesn't feel like she can talk to you about these tattoos prior to getting them? It seems very sneaky. I would be very upset if my teenager did not feel comfortable talking to me about making permanent changes to their body. After that second tattoo, I think I would have had to reiterate some rules. At the very least, discuss why she doesn't feel like she can talk to you about these things.

May I ask if you have teenagers? Even in the best of relationships, teenagers get a notion to do something and aren't going to let a little thing like permission get in their way. Most know perfectly well what their parents will say if they discuss it and have a fair idea of what the consequences are going to be after the fact. They do it anyway. Not even necessarily to be defiant, but just because they're hell-bent on having their way and know that no amount of "talking" would avail in getting a parent's approval.

This is very, very typical teen behavior and I flat-out disbelieve anybody who says they: a) never did it themselves as teens; and/or b) say they absolutely never had a situation like this with their own kids. If you haven't yet, just give it time.

 

[cruiser21]

If you can’t detect a question from a vent, I can’t help you

From the looks of the responses you got I'm sure I'm not the only one that assumed you were looking for advice.

 

[kimblebee]

From the looks of the responses you got I'm sure I'm not the only one that assumed you were looking for advice.

People give unsolicited advice here all the time. It’s one of the best part of these boards lol

I didn’t say people didn’t give advice, I’m saying I didn’t ask for it. You assumed I wanted it..big difference.

On that note, I’m off to have supper. Have a great night

 

[LSUmiss]

May I ask if you have teenagers? Even in the best of relationships, teenagers get a notion to do something and aren't going to let a little thing like permission get in their way. Most know perfectly well what their parents will say if they discuss it and have a fair idea of what the consequences are going to be after the fact. They do it anyway. Not even necessarily to be defiant, but just because they're hell-bent on having their way and know that no amount of "talking" would avail in getting a parent's approval.

This is very, very typical teen behavior and I flat-out disbelieve anybody who says they: a) never did it themselves as teens; and/or b) say they absolutely never had a situation like this with their own kids. If you haven't yet, just give it time.

I don’t have teenagers, but I absolutely did not violate major rules in my household & neither did my sister when we were teenagers. In fact, most ppl in our circle of friends did not. This isn’t to say that we didn’t do anything wrong but definitely nothing that would be considered “rebellious”. While I know that it’s not uncommon to rebellious as a teenager, it’s definitely not everyone.

 

[NHdisneylover]

All of the "teens just do this stuff now" comments on this thread remind me of the "boys will be boys" comments some parents make to absolve their sons of any and all bad behaviour (and themselves of putting a stop to it).

My kids are 19 and 21. I made plenty of mistakes raising them. Neither is perfect, nor am I. I was (and am) a very permissive parent who let my kids do lots of things which would have many DISsers clutching pearls and gasping (I have been called a terrible parent on these boards more than once).
But I NEVER shrugged off behaviour that put others at direct risk---like giving tattoos to others without proper training. I can't even imagine having the reaction in the OP to learning that information.

 

[jevs]

I’m going to give you some advice Kimmy. Don’t tease me about nice warm weather ever again.

As for Q, it is illegal across this entire country for anyone to tattoo anyone under 18 without written parental consent. I think that your kiddo is tattooing other kids is possibly more of a concern. I can see those red flags all the way here.

 

[FutureDisneyEventPlanner]

I got my first tattoo when I was 20, second at 21, and third at 22. I'm currently 23, about to get my fourth. They were all done in parlors, very clean and rated well. My parents used to always say "tattoos are permanent, make sure you love it first". I feel like the whole poke and stick tattoo fad is a little unsanitary and impulsive. I definitely don't think she should be tattooing her friends though. Their parents may come to you and then you'll be under a lot of fire for that.

 

[nkereina]

I have no idea what the appeal is..besides cost. Around here, it’s $120 to just sit in a tattoo artists chair..even if you want the most basic tat, you’re going to pay for it.

Yeah, that's pretty typical. Again, I would say to offer to pay for one for her 18th birthday or offer to sign off on parental consent for a professional if she's willing to pay for one and doesn't want to wait. Teens won't care about the risks of self-tattoos enough to stop, but they're inclined to oblige if a deal is struck in their favor.