Parents with kids of the same sex

[NinaBella]

Well..unless her son is not attracted to girls..

But I do get what she means-the sentiment is there.

Odds are one of the three would marry a woman.

 

[Belleofthehouse]

I know someone with three sons and when she gets comments about if she wanted a girl she replies she will have a daughter in the future, she’s just going to let her son pick her (daughter in law).

EXACTLY what my husband and I say! I have three fantastic boys, 21,19, 16. I could not be more grateful for those three guys in my life. My girls will come when they get married. Yes, the comments got old for me but people just do not think. Why am I missing anything g because I didn’t have a girl??

 

[BrookieM2001]

Yes. Our youngest DD is 7 months and she is the third girl. Everyone we know kept telling me she was a boy and were seriously disappointed she wasn't. I was THRILLED!!! I always wanted 3 girls, now i have them. I have no desire to have a boy. Maybe that comes from my sister having 4 boys and helping to raise them, and wanting to get my hands on some bows and tutus and princess stuff, i dont know. But this is what i was hoping for and DH also wasn't hoping for a boy. Everyone always said they felt sorry for him but he grew up with 2 sisters, and we already had 2 girls and i think he felt the same way i did, that we know how to do the girl thing. Boys would've thrown everything we know out the window and while i wouldn't have been sad if we had a boy, we were both hoping for each girl we got and thats enough. When people ask, i get irritated but i just say that my c section with this baby took 3 hours and so we are done. Usually when you talk about medical stuff, people back off.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Odds are one of the three would marry a woman.

IDK..maybe maybe not. Just saying in this day that phrase is extremely confining and may not be applicable at all.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I would get the opposite- aren't your going to have another one? She will always be lonely, she will be spoiled, etc- the worst was when she was in for an ultra this old Italian male doing the ultrasound told me that I should have another one because what if something happened to this one at least I would have another-- I finally just started saying "once you have the perfect child you don't need to keep trying for others, I had the perfect one so I stopped there"

Ugh I know seriously. That's so bad of that guy to say that to you! I've heard "oh you don't want to just have one" speech a lot too even by those close to me and I'm sitting here thinking "well if I just have one child for whatever reason what business is it of yours". Good for you for your come back

 

[BadgerGirl84]

I have three girls as well. Yes, I get the "so when are you trying for a boy??" and "your poor husband!" pretty often. It doesn't bother me. I usually just respond that I love having all girls.

 

[3 MEN AND A BOAT]

I’d respond
“Have you seen the price of kids clothes? We were hoping to get a third use out of that $50 outfit we bought at Tiny Town.”

 

[tzolkin]

When I was pregnant with #3 it was irritating to me that everyone assumed we were hoping for a boy. I’m sure it wasn’t intentional, but it implied to me that there was something not good enough about my girls that we would want to “keep trying” until we got a boy.

When we found out the sex (boy) and even after he was born, we constantly received comments about “how happy we must be” that we finally got a boy.

I usually responded that we were happy either way, but another girl would actually have been more convenient. That always made people pause for a moment and realize it was a dumb/rude thing to say.


Not related to sex, but to number... when I was a kid my parents received rude comments constantly about having too many children. “You know there’s a cure for that”/something about birth control was the most frequent (which was extremely hurtful because my mother had complications with my youngest sister and was no longer able to have more children). We also heard countless times, “Oh you must be Catholic.” To which my mother always replied, “No, we are half Catholic. That’s why we ONLY have 4.”

 

[pxidst119]

We both love having 3 girls. We also would get the comment from people feeling sorry for DH. Now that they are all teens, I see why. It can get a little crazy around here with 3 of them. I understand their unpredictable moods better than he does and he’s gotten better at waiting for the storm to pass.

 

[MamaBelle4]

How many questions and "poor you" did you get while expecting your 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, etc? We're having our third girl at the end of May (due May 31st), and my husband and I get asked on a frequent basis. "You NEED to try for THE boy?!" "Your poor husband, he'll be living in the estrogen ocean!" "Did you try and sway for a boy?"

They're all REALLY unnecessary questions, and quite frankly, it makes me uncomfortable! I'm proud of my family, and I know my husband is as well.

Does anyone have any good comebacks?

Help a mama out!

Thx!

We have four girls. Number 5 is a boy. We got those comments all the time. Now we get "Oh, you got your boy. Bet dad is relieved. Good job dad!"

I just say, "We would have been just as happy if he was a girl too." Or "I think their Daddy did a good job the first four times as well." If that makes them uncomfortable GOOD.

 

[quandrea]

When I was pregnant with #3 it was irritating to me that everyone assumed we were hoping for a boy. I’m sure it wasn’t intentional, but it implied to me that there was something not good enough about my girls that we would want to “keep trying” until we got a boy.

When we found out the sex (boy) and even after he was born, we constantly received comments about “how happy we must be” that we finally got a boy.

I usually responded that we were happy either way, but another girl would actually have been more convenient. That always made people pause for a moment and realize it was a dumb/rude thing to say.


Not related to sex, but to number... when I was a kid my parents received rude comments constantly about having too many children. “You know there’s a cure for that”/something about birth control was the most frequent (which was extremely hurtful because my mother had complications with my youngest sister and was no longer able to have more children). We also heard countless times, “Oh you must be Catholic.” To which my mother always replied, “No, we are half Catholic. That’s why we ONLY have 4.”

I get the too many kids comments on a pretty regular basis. I only have three—my youngest are a set of twins, so it’s not like I had any say in the number of kids. It’s a touchy subject for me and people are usually met with a pretty assertive reply on my part. I consider my twins true medical miracles.

 

[Lilacs4Me]

We have 2 girls. People feel sorry for me and I let them.

My dad had 5 girls. I can't even begin to type out all the cr*p he got while we were growing up lol

 

[MamaBelle4]

"How kind you are to take such an interest in our business."

I LOVE this.

 

[Lilacs4Me]

I have three kids, and believe me, people will FIND things to say no matter what.

When I had DD, who is one day shy of four years younger than her older brother, people said "now you have one of each, you can stop now!" like having one boy and one girl is the epitome of a perfect family or something.

When I had younger DS, I had family members say that we needed to try for another girl so we could balance things out.

DD was 19 months old at the time, and we could already see her personality, so I would just tell those people - Noooo, DD needs to be the ONLY girl in this family! (she is almost 14 now, and trust me....we made the right choice. I'm not sure I could have handled another girl, and I am positive SHE couldn't! lol)

I am one of 5 girls. We were a novelty in our community, that's for sure.

 

[MamaBelle4]

We also heard countless times, “Oh you must be Catholic.” To which my mother always replied, “No, we are half Catholic. That’s why we ONLY have 4.”

That is so funny. I was out with my kids and this woman started praying over us (blessing us), and making all these comments about church and which one did I go to and about a Catholic monument/shrine in the area. She actually thanked me for having so many kids. It was so bizarre.

 

[cabanafrau]

First pregnancy I wished for the gender to match the last cutest baby I saw, in other words I had no idea what my preference was. Second pregnancy I had terrible guilt because I was wishing for a second girl so my daughter would have a sister to go through life with.

A part of me had an idea that it would be easier because I "knew how to parent a girl" since I learned stuff from the first. The joke was on me. They are close to one another, but they are very different people. Unbelievably what worked to parent the first didn't always work on the second. Who knew?

 

[soccerdad72]

We haven't gotten comments in a long time, but my wife will openly admit that when she was pregnant with our second son, she had hoped and wished for a baby girl. She simply always wanted to have a daughter. Needless to say, we fell in love with our son the second that he was born and now that both our boys are older, we joke that we wouldn't be able to handle raising a girl.

Most people have an image of what the 'perfect' family would be - unfortunately, for some, they think their version of a perfect family is what others should strive for.

 

[smokeyblue]

People just say it to make small talk. I get aggravating comments about not having kids all the time. I know they aren't doing to hurt my feelings. If you're happy with or accepted what you have, who cares?

 

[smiths02]

I have a son (11) and boy/girl twins (5 now). I will often be out with all 3 of them. Many, many times, people told me that having a boy/girl was all that was necessary in life...completely ignoring my older child standing right there. And this was right at the age when he was old enough to understand that it was rude but not quite old enough to brush it off that he was essentially being called unnecessary. (And some people do try to correct their mistake and say something like "boy/girl is perfect AND you have a helper")

Just wait until someone tells your youngest she was an accident because she has 2 older brothers. She called from college upset because one of her teachers told the class she must have been an accident. She wouldn’t believe me when I kept trying to tell her she wasn’t. It had never occurred to her, and now she believes she was an accident.Grrrrrr

My twins know that we were only trying to have one more baby. My daughter (the last to be born, technically) takes pride in announcing that she is the "extra" one. She will usually add something like "God thought you were a good mom, so he gave you 3."


But I don't usually bother with comebacks or getting offended. I just state the facts.

 

[smiths02]

I get the too many kids comments on a pretty regular basis. I only have three—my youngest are a set of twins, so it’s not like I had any say in the number of kids. It’s a touchy subject for me and people are usually met with a pretty assertive reply on my part. I consider my twins true medical miracles.

When you don't have any or have 1, people are pestering you about having kids...once you have three, it feels like people are constantly asking "You are done having kids, right?"