Single Moms/Dads...I don't know how you do it!

[Pembo]

Lots of kudos to all of you single parents out there. My dh left yesterday morning, returning home tonight. I'm so TIRED of being the only parent. Ds 6 & 4 didn't have school yesterday, too cold, and they were good but in their prayers last night they both asked that the baby sleep all night so Mom isn't so cranky. My 6 mo dd napped maybe 2 hours TOTAL all day yesterday, and so far today isn't looking too good (she's crying in her crib now). She didn't go to bed until 11 pm last night and was up at 3:30 (for 10 mins) and back up at 7:30, just when my alarm went off. AUGH!!!!!

Dh owes me BIG TIME!

I don't know how all of you moms & dads do it out there w/o help. I know I'm spoiled by a great DH and very lucky he'll be home in 4 or 5 hours.........or less........

 

[Snow White]

I agree, I have a hard time handling all my teen boys even with the help of my DH, I salute all the single moms and dads, that is a full time job!

 

[Marla Hellwig]

I just basically take each day one at a time - and hope we both survive - now that dd is older - it is somewhat better - but as she gets older the more strong willed she is getting

 

[believe]

I don't envy any single parents. I have a hard enough time with DH working 2nd shift and me 1st shift. Atleast I know they are home with him and don't have to worry about childcare, otherwise at night I am a single parent and he is a daytime single parent.

My sister is a single parent of 3 kids, her 1 son lives with his father. She is constantly struggling with them...it doesn't help that the one father isn't as involved as he should be.

 

[December99]

It was a tough road for me when I was a single mom and still feel like I need to play that "single mom" role although dh does try to help out - it is just a mental thing for me.

The single parents that I applaud are the ones with multiple kids...some days it was hard with just one!!!!

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

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As you know, the challenges change as the kids get older, and I think the hardest part for me, at times, is having to make all those decisions on my own with no other adult to give me a reality check.

Am I being too strict (the kids would say yes, sometimes) ... am I being too lenient (yes, sometimes). I've only had a couple of times, though, when I really felt I needed a partner - one time was when my ds had these "holes" in his skin - it scared the heck out of me, and I worried that they would be life-threatening - turned out that it was a type of virus like pink eye that spreads on the skin when touched - easily handled w/antibiotics - but that was during the big skin-eating scare that was going on. I forget the other time ...

You just do it cuz <s>no one else isn't going to</s> that's part of life.

 

[aprincessmom]

The single parents that I applaud are the ones with multiple kids...some days it was hard with just one!!!!

I think that even for my friends who have two-parent families! Somedays they just seem to outnumber you

But, from a single parent perspective, you do what you have to do. It would be nice to have some help but, in the end, it's still wonderful being mommy.

 

[Robinrs]

I personally enjoy it!

I relish being a parent, and if I have to be Mom AND Dad, I can do it!

I am blessed with a very good kid, we are very different but we get along very well. There's alot of mutual respect between us and that truly helps.

I like being the last word on everything. He knows I am the only one who he can ask and if I say no, it's NO. I remember running from parent to parent until I got the answer I wanted as a kid!

I do understand how hard it can be if you're accustomed to having help. I'm not. My ex became schizophrenic when I was pregnant with Michael so I have never had his help. I guess it's what you're used to.

It IS a struggle, but nothing good comes easy. I am fulfilling a lifelong dream being a Mother, and I don't ever complain because I spent many years wanting this more than anything.

I just feel sorry for his Dad because he's not experiencing the joys of watching him grow, and getting the kudos from a kid who is SO grateful for what he has.

I am a very blessed human being.

 

[Mishetta]

Wow Robinrs, that was beautifully written! Kudo's to you!

We have 2 children (1 with ADHD) & even with my husband's full help & support, I find some days too difficult to deal with! I'd probably want to leave home if I had to do this by myself!

I salute all you single parents out there & send pixie dust to those who are single parents of ADD/ADHD children!

 

[Pin Wizard]

Single parenting is tough at times but worth every bit of it! It's a challenge that makes me feel great. And I love not having to "check in" with someone else. I do what I want when I want. Believe me...if DH were still here, he would have given me a huge fight on sending DS to a private school. This way, I wanted him to go and I sent him! Thank goodness I have such a good kid. He's such a blessing!

 

[December99]

My dd was diagnosed ADHD when I was still single...I think that was the hardest time in my life. I had no one to talk to about it, no one that I knew would understand, and no one to help me make the hardest decision (at that time) in my life.

One thing I will say after reading Robin's post - I do have to say, and not just because she is my daughter, if there is one thing I taught her it was respect for others. She needed to learn the respect that I needed my space and time to myself once in a while during our "single" time and I have seen her have the utmost respect for people...she isn't always the most patient or non-interuptive kid - but she is a very respectful kid!!!!! And that makes me proud!! And you all are right...being a mom has been the best thing that happened to me in my life - I WOULDN'T TRADE BEING A SINGLE PARENT IN THE WORLD!!!!!

As she gets older it gets harder to find mom and me time with her and that is something I could always count on....we always had time ALONE together!!!!

 

[Serena]

You do what ya gotta do. I've been the sole person responsible for my children since they were born. Luckily, except for personality problems we've done fine.

 

[Robin]

When I first seperated from my first husband I was delighted to be a single parent... I knew that "I" could be a better parent then my ex and I were together.

Then I met my second husband and we were a family, everything was wonderful and it was incredible to have help.

Now that my second husband has passed I am a single parent all over again. This time is HARD... my DD is older now and realizes that I am doing the best job being two parents. Dan was the one that woke her up in the morning for school, he did her hair, he took her shopping, he made her meals, they had special ways of doing verything.... all these seem like little things until you miss one of them.

I get up everymorning and do what I know I need to do... it really is not an option.