The Sober/Curious movement?

[NotUrsula]

As someone who is a little past bar-culture, agewise, I'm finding this topic fascinating. (The name throws me a bit, though; "/curious" seems an unusual term to use in this context. One article I read gave "sober sometimes" as an alternative term, and I think that one makes more sense.) https://www.npr.org/sections/health...the-booze-habit-even-briefly-has-its-benefits

I'm not really clear if this is about simply not drinking, or the economic perspective of "bars" that don't serve alcohol. It seems that the really new and different aspect is the business side.

DH & I largely gave up buying liquor in restaurants when we were first married; we did it solely as a money-saving strategy because we had a lot of student debt and were saving for a house. Decades later, it has become a habit, and we're so aghast at the price of alcohol served by the glass that we simply can't bring ourselves to indulge in it now, even though we can afford it. Also, 5 years ago I developed a health problem that makes me unable to metabolize alcohol, so I had to give it up entirely. DH still drinks on occasion, but not very often. I've never really had any issues with people wanting an explanation of why I don't drink; I socialize with a lot of live-and-let-live kinds of people, I guess.

Maybe I know an unusual number of frugal people, but most everyone I know gave up the bar scene more over what it cost (primarily in babysitting) than in wanting to avoid social pressure to drink. (Avoidance of secondhand smoke was a big motivator, too.) Do you think that "sober bars" are a niche that can work? As a frugal non-drinker, I do find myself avoiding going to workplace happy hours, etc., because of cost; even non-alcoholic drinks are exhorbitantl in bars, and I have a feeling that won't change.

 

[Hikergirl]

I'm not sure why this needs to be a "movement".
If you don't want to drink, don't drink.

 

[3 MEN AND A BOAT]

One day I’m going to dream up a movement, not sure what it’ll be about but I just want a movement that I can say “You see that? I started that,”

 

[FlightlessDuck]

This sounds like it's needed for people who tend to overindulge a lot.

I'm going with the "got to lose weight" version of sober.

 

[Kennywood]

At an office where my wife once worked, a younger woman found out that we don't drink. The woman was amazed and asked my wife, "Well....how do you have any fun??"

 

[L&Lfan]

Not catching on at Disney. They’re even selling booze now in the candy stores! Check out the update on goofy’s candy company at Disney springs.

 

[Moliphino]

I gave up alcohol for Lent last year and didn't notice any weight loss. I didn't it this year because we were going to Italy during Lent and there was no way I was going to Italy and not drinking wine.

 

[L&Lfan]

All I can think of when I see this thread is bi-curious....

 

[DLgal]

There is no need to go hard to one side or the other. I don't really go to standalone bars too much, but it's nice to have the option. I drink occasionally at restaurants because I appreciate high quality, interesting cocktails. It gives me inspiration for making drinks at home. I might have 1 drink a week at home, often none for weeks at a time.

I think people just feel the need to label EVERYTHING THEY DO these days and categorize it, and so thus we have movements like this.

 

[Christine]

I read an article on this just the other day (though not the same one as your link). Honestly, it was sad. It appears that over the last 20 years or so, a huge drinking culture has emerged. I believe it moreso effect the 40 and under crowds. Parents are at their kids soccer games bring cocktails, and so forth. Instead of it being a once in a while thing, it seems that every event revolves around alcohol and what the alcohol "theme" will be, winery outings, and so forth. The article I read talks about this demographic exploring the fun parts of their life sober.

 

[NotUrsula]

I gave up alcohol for Lent last year and didn't notice any weight loss. I didn't it this year because we were going to Italy during Lent and there was no way I was going to Italy and not drinking wine.

Yeah, I noticed that claim, too. The only people who've ever told me that they really lost weight just from giving up drinking were people who had pretty serious drinking problems; the sort of folks who were drinking upward of 1500 calories a day. That's a LOT of booze.

 

[sonnyjane]

As someone who is a little past bar-culture, agewise, I'm finding this topic fascinating. (The name throws me a bit, though; "/curious" seems an unusual term to use in this context. One article I read gave "sober sometimes" as an alternative term, and I think that one makes more sense.) https://www.npr.org/sections/health...the-booze-habit-even-briefly-has-its-benefits

I'm not really clear if this is about simply not drinking, or the economic perspective of "bars" that don't serve alcohol. It seems that the really new and different aspect is the business side.

DH & I largely gave up buying liquor in restaurants when we were first married; we did it solely as a money-saving strategy because we had a lot of student debt and were saving for a house. Decades later, it has become a habit, and we're so aghast at the price of alcohol served by the glass that we simply can't bring ourselves to indulge in it now, even though we can afford it. Also, 5 years ago I developed a health problem that makes me unable to metabolize alcohol, so I had to give it up entirely. DH still drinks on occasion, but not very often. I've never really had any issues with people wanting an explanation of why I don't drink; I socialize with a lot of live-and-let-live kinds of people, I guess.

Maybe I know an unusual number of frugal people, but most everyone I know gave up the bar scene more over what it cost (primarily in babysitting) than in wanting to avoid social pressure to drink. (Avoidance of secondhand smoke was a big motivator, too.) Do you think that "sober bars" are a niche that can work? As a frugal non-drinker, I do find myself avoiding going to workplace happy hours, etc., because of cost; even non-alcoholic drinks are exhorbitantl in bars, and I have a feeling that won't change.

If you've ever been to a bar or restaurant that serves "mocktails", you'll know that this isn't an economic decision. They can often be just about as expensive as the alcoholic version. The article does allude that this is primarily a health choice.

 

[Kitty 34]

To me, there are many bars; salad bar, breakfast bar, side bar, even candy bar.......but if I'm going to a "real" bar I expect to be served a rum and coke.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

There was an article in my local magazine last year that went over the mommy drinking culture. The woman the article talked about how all her and the moms would do is get together during the day and drink a lot (these were not young 20-something moms either). She realized it was a problem when she was picking her child up from school drunk. When she realized that all they ever did was drink and drink with these moms and she had become an alcoholic at that point she stopped seeing those moms and got sober.

I tell you I had never thought about it to that extreme until I read that article. It makes new meaning to all the merchandise centered around drinking. I still think those are mostly harmless but I can see how people jump on this bandwagon looking and acting the part. The article I mentioned above kinda exposed the local affluent mommy drinking culture that wasn't really talked about.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

As a frugal non-drinker, I do find myself avoiding going to workplace happy hours, etc., because of cost; even non-alcoholic drinks are exhorbitantl in bars, and I have a feeling that won't change.

Are the waters and pop or teas or whatever that isn't mock-tail or alcoholic beverages exhorbitant too?

 

[DISNEYSQUIRRELS]

I’m a non-drinker. I never developed an interest or taste for any alcohol.
I happened to meet someone that is the same way, he is also a non-drinker.
I can definitely say that people get curious about why. Is it a religious choice? did we meet at AA? No, we just don’t like it.
My guys sister loves to make drinks & she is very talented at it. They always look awesome & people love them. She always asks me to try something, I have taken sips of things but can easily pass.
What I find frustrating is all inclusives or the Disney Dining plan that includes alcohol.
Well, if your not a drinker you don’t care about that perk. I wish pricing was offered with & without alcohol.

 

[NotUrsula]

Are the waters and pop or teas or whatever that isn't mock-tail or alcoholic beverages exhorbitant too?

Last time I went to a happy hour at a bar (about 3 years ago, I think) I was charged $5.50 for a ordinary fountain Coke. not counting the tip. To me, that's pretty exhorbitant.

 

[Imzadi]

I'm not sure why this needs to be a "movement".
If you don't want to drink, don't drink.

At an office where my wife once worked, a younger woman found out that we don't drink. The woman was amazed and asked my wife, "Well....how do you have any fun??"

I can definitely say that people get curious about why. Is it a religious choice? did we meet at AA? No, we just don’t like it.

It's actually hard to be a non-drinker amongst a group of drinkers. I don't have a problem with them drinking. I just don't like alcohol. Most of all, other than caffeine, I don't like mind altering drugs, especially one that DULLS the senses. A long time ago, I learned to simply make the excuse, "I don't drink alcohol as it just makes me sleepy." I joke, "I'll just end up in the corner over there asleep. So what's the point?"

That usually works on most people. However, there have been a couple times where people try to insist that I simply need to drink more than I was to get past the sleepy point.

Then, there was one event I went to where the hostess, once she found out I wasn't drinking, nearly had a cow over it. She had to know WHY??? Then she told other people I wasn't drinking, as she introduced me to them. And then they had to ask why??? Was I an alcoholic? Was it for religious reasons? Was I going to judge them as they got more sloshed? (The way they were judging me. ) I pretty much spent the whole time fielding those questions. I thought it might be easier to lie and just say, yes, I'm an alcoholic. Then they'd have an "acceptable" reason as to why I don't drink. But, I didn't. Needless to say, that was the last time I did something with the hostess & her DH.

Then there are the people, who when a group of us goes out to dinner, they have had a few drinks. They always want to split the check evenly. So, those of us who haven't had any alcohol (or appetizers,) are supposed to subsidize their drinks. We end up having to state how some people didn't order a lot, not even appetizers, and it's not fair to split the check evenly.

I think it would be a breath of fresh air to be with people who also don't drink and we don't have to give reasons why.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

It's actually hard to be a non-drinker amongst a group of drinkers.

I think it would be hard to be around people who like to get drunk when they drink even as someone who drinks. I turn down going to certain things with my husband's coworkers because all they want to do is get drunk. Not my idea of fun.

That being said people who question why you don't drink in a judgmental way are just jerks IMO and even as someone who drinks every now and then I've experienced some jerks as to why I only stop at one or two beers or that I "nurse" a beer. I attribute that to just jerky behavior.

Incidentally from someone who enjoys 1 beer maybe 2 beers every now and then the most judgmental people I've seen are ones who don't drink and all and then think that even having a beer makes you the biggest sinner ever while stating "why do you need to/have to drink" and then I explain that I don't have to or need to yadda, etc. I'm not talking about you at all in that statement just giving the other side of the coin.

 

[DISNEYSQUIRRELS]

It's actually hard to be a non-drinker amongst a group of drinkers. I don't have a problem with them drinking. I just don't like alcohol. Most of all, other than caffeine, I don't like mind altering drugs, especially one that DULLS the senses. A long time ago, I learned to simply make the excuse, "I don't drink alcohol as it just makes me sleepy." I joke, "I'll just end up in the corner over there asleep. So what's the point?"

That usually works on most people. However, there have been a couple times where people try to insist that I simply need to drink more than I was to get past the sleepy point.

Then, there was one event I went to where the hostess, once she found out I wasn't drinking, nearly had a cow over it. She had to know WHY??? Then she told other people I wasn't drinking, as she introduced me to them. And then they had to ask why??? Was I an alcoholic? Was it for religious reasons? Was I going to judge them as they got more sloshed? (The way they were judging me. ) I pretty much spent the whole time fielding those questions. I thought it might be easier to lie and just say, yes, I'm an alcoholic. Then they'd have an "acceptable" reason as to why I don't drink. But, I didn't. Needless to say, that was the last time I did something with the hostess & her DH.

Then there are the people, who when a group of us goes out to dinner, they have had a few drinks. They always want to split the check evenly. So, those of us who haven't had any alcohol (or appetizers,) are supposed to subsidize their drinks. We end up having to state how some people didn't order a lot, not even appetizers, and it's not fair to split the check evenly.

I think it would be a breath of fresh air to be with people who also don't drink and we don't have to give reasons why.

Let’s start a club @Imzadi!