Would You Have Taken Back The TV from Grandma?

[tarheelmjfan]

I do t think the police should have been called either but I am curious where you would stand if the son had taken $200 from Grandmas wallet without permission, would you think she was in the wrong if she called the police?

We don't know the history of the situation with grandma, but it would take more than one instance for me to call the police on a grandchild. Physical abuse is a different story. One time may be enough depending on the type & severity of abuse. Some things can't be ignored.

PS: I'm obviously not soccerdad72. I'm just answering from my own perspective.

 

[wenrob]

I do t think the police should have been called either but I am curious where you would stand if the son had taken $200 from Grandmas wallet without permission, would you think she was in the wrong if she called the police?

I have a younger cousin who spent a few months in jail for in part (there were some drug charges in there too) ripping off my grandma as well as his maternal grandmother. Both grandmas were adamantly against it but in the end it was his dad who turned him in. Probably the safest place for him at the time because the rest of us wanted to string the little punk up.

I personally would give a grandma a little grace. At least the first time. I'm ferociously protective of my kid's feelings though so all bets would be off if she tried to make him feel bad about getting the TV back. I wouldn't call the cops but it would be a very long time before I'd trust her or allow her in my home again.

 

[mummabear]

I have a younger cousin who spent a few months in jail for in part (there were some drug charges in there too) ripping off my grandma as well as his maternal grandmother. Both grandmas were adamantly against it but in the end it was his dad who turned him in. Probably the safest place for him at the time because the rest of us wanted to string the little punk up.

I personally would give a grandma a little grace. At least the first time. I'm ferociously protective of my kid's feelings though so all bets would be off if she tried to make him feel bad about getting the TV back. I wouldn't call the cops but it would be a very long time before I'd trust her or allow her in my home again.

I agree that for some kids it would help them to "scare" them into a between path.

I do think we want to be careful about the messages we give our kids by allowing adults to get away with things.

For example my parents recently got back from a trip home and gave the girls some twizzlers which we can't get in NZ, DD5 was eating some as we arrived to our Girl Guide meeting (I am a leader in her unit) and one of the other leaders snatched one from her hand and are it laughing, I am sure the other leader thought it was a great joke, DD was crying. And I let rip at this women, that a) this was a special treat from home that can't be bought here thy her grandparents had literally just given her after being away for several months and b) in no way is it acceptable to snatch stuff from a child, if a child had done that they would have been in big trouble but for an adult to do so leaves me flabbergasted.

I had a big talk with DD about how unacceptable the behaviour of the other leader was and let her know in no uncertain terms what she had had happen was completely unacceptable.

I do think the OP has shown her son that what Grandma did was also not acceptable, I am just not sure there should be such an old person pass that all they have to do is give it back (against their will while talking smack behind peoples back for having to give it back) and they still get bought a TV. I think she should be forced to apologise to the son and admit to him that what she did was wrong

 

[Imzadi]

I do t think the police should have been called either but I am curious where you would stand if the son had taken $200 from Grandmas wallet without permission, would you think she was in the wrong if she called the police?

The police actually wouldn't have done much in this TV situation as they'd consider this a domestic dispute. As a PP said, this is not a situation where physical force or intimidation was used. The grandson wasn't threatened and tied up while Thug Granny & her goons made off with the TV.

The fact is the grandson LET her have the TV. (Never mind the emotional extortion & guilt tripping. )

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My son uses the TV a lot (Netflix, gaming, etc.) and was pretty sad about it but didn't want to argue with her because he felt bad.

All the police would do is write out a report and go have a talk with Granny and she would say her grandson let them walk out the door with it. He didn't try to stop her. He didn't call his parents. He didn't call the police himself at the time. Case closed.

If the grandson does tell the police he did object and Grandma tells a different story, as sweet as pie says that it was a misunderstanding, or that "Oh dear, grandson must have changed his story when the parents got home and were mad that he gave the TV away," it becomes a "he said, she said." Again a domestic dispute the cops don't like to get involved with. They actually aren't there to sort out the truth. That's up to the courts to decide. They then say it's a civil case, not criminal. All parties should go to court or mediation to prove who is telling the truth and who gets the TV.

 

[wenrob]

I agree that for some kids it would help them to "scare" them into a between path.

I do think we want to be careful about the messages we give our kids by allowing adults to get away with things.

For example my parents recently got back from a trip home and gave the girls some twizzlers which we can't get in NZ, DD5 was eating some as we arrived to our Girl Guide meeting (I am a leader in her unit) and one of the other leaders snatched one from her hand and are it laughing, I am sure the other leader thought it was a great joke, DD was crying. And I let rip at this women, that a) this was a special treat from home that can't be bought here thy her grandparents had literally just given her after being away for several months and b) in no way is it acceptable to snatch stuff from a child, if a child had done that they would have been in big trouble but for an adult to do so leaves me flabbergasted.

I had a big talk with DD about how unacceptable the behaviour of the other leader was and let her know in no uncertain terms what she had had happen was completely unacceptable.

I do think the OP has shown her son that what Grandma did was also not acceptable, I am just not sure there should be such an old person pass that all they have to do is give it back (against their will while talking smack behind peoples back for having to give it back) and they still get bought a TV. I think she should be forced to apologise to the son and admit to him that what she did was wrong

We are in agreement 100%.

 

[Wishing on a star]

To these few posters..... I never blamed the DH for anything... I 'wondered' where he stood.
The title of the OP was not "WWYD - MIL stole TV".
After she did say mil, she then did not mention her husband, at all.
I actually supported the DH's reaction, after the OP finally came back and clarified.

Quoting a very select few words from a post and taking them totally and completely out of context, to then completely twist and re-word.... (indicating that I blamed anybody)
Definitiely misquoting and twisting.... No question, at all.

Apparently everyone agrees that they would also have retrieved the TV...
The whole situation is over.... Settled....
But, glad to see that those of you are still so happy to follow my every word and love-to-hate me!!!

 

[soccerdad72]

 

[wenrob]

To these few posters..... I never blamed the DH for anything... I 'wondered' where he stood.
The title of the OP was not "WWYD - MIL stole TV".
After she did say mil, she then did not mention her husband, at all.
I actually supported the DH's reaction, after the OP finally came back and clarified.

Quoting a very select few words from a post and taking them totally and completely out of context, to then completely twist and re-word.... (indicating that I blamed anybody)
Definitiely misquoting and twisting.... No question, at all.

Apparently everyone agrees that they would also have retrieved the TV...
The whole situation is over.... Settled....
But, glad to see that those of you are still so happy to follow my every word and love-to-hate me!!!

What's funny is that I think you actually believe this. You were quoted DIRECTLY. Nothing was snipped, nothing was twisted, nothing was misquoted. They were your own words.