Attacked on the boards

[SaraJayne]

As a society, we've become so polarized (and self-involved) that any opinion that differs from our own is now considered an "attack".

Totally agree.

 

[Sgt Mickey]

After reading this it sure reminds me of where this thread took off too.


http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=2948665&highlight=bullying+on+dis&page=6

 

[beaucoup]

Don't know you, haven't followed your posts other than to know that you moved. You mentioned you were going to stop posting or post under another name. I forget which. If that's what your going to do then do it and move along.

Again, I mean no ill will. If you want to leave or post under another name, just do it.

Ditto. There is no way you are going to reach every member here and tell them they need to be extra nice to you. Most times, I just comment and don't even pay attention to who I am commenting to.

Even if you had a huge red flashing warning to be extra nice as your signature, I probably would miss it..

If you can't handle how peopl respond, the Internet may not be for you. Too sensitive.

 

[mhsjax]

I haven't read any of the OP's past threads, but I understand what she's talking about regarding these boards. There are certain posters here who seem to relish finding any inconsistency in posted information and pouncing on it. They'll do multiple quotes and post links to past threads just to prove how right (and superior) they are.

Those types of posts go beyond simply disagreeing or giving an opinion that the OP might not like. It's mean-spirited and nasty. It makes me wonder how people can have so little going on in their own lives that they can put so much energy into keeping track of anonymous posters on a message board.

Probably because people with this type of personality have no real friends, so they come here to interact.

 

[DisneyFan32WI]

Wishing you peace.

 

[fiestamomma]

There are certain posters here who seem to relish finding any inconsistency in posted information and pouncing on it. They'll do multiple quotes and post links to past threads just to prove how right (and superior) they are.

I'm new to the boards. Overall I have found some great information on all topics, not just Disney. I like to troll and read different threads (hence how I found this thread).
But you hit the nail on the head here. I have read countless threads and seen five different users who consistently show up and quote and over quote and link up to past threads to "prove" their "right". I'm able to read and walk away and don't get involved because its not why I'm here but I can see where that would be really frustrating for any OP. and then it gets comical to see all the other posters who continue the thread and really rile up those "quote happy" users Comical to me yes, frustrating for others, understandable

 

[Scurvy]

Probably because people with this type of personality have no real friends, so they come here to interact.

It's so funny to me that you would say that, because I was just now thinking it was actually the reverse of that! It just shows how differently people can see the same situation, I guess.

Some people don't take the internet seriously enough to be upset or offended by what strangers on there say to them. They have real life friends, and they have Internet friends/acquaintances, and they know the two are not the same at all. They don't get overly emotionally invested in online interactions simply because they know those interactions don't matter any more once they turn off the computer. They don't take disagreement or criticism personally on a message board because they know how impersonal it all really is.

Then there are the people who do cry over criticism or disagreements online, and they seem to take it all much more personally than the other posters do. They come onto a board and post incredibly personal things and get upset when people have differing opinions or don't seem to like them. If someone has a fulfilling real life, and actual real life friends, I don't understand why they would get so wrapped up in casual online interactions. I don't understand why they would care so much about the differing opinions of people they don't even know.

 

[ilovemk76]

Probably because people with this type of personality have no real friends, so they come here to interact.

The ones with no real friends are the ones who start a thread with, "I have nobody I can talk to about this ....".

 

[mhsjax]

It's so funny to me that you would say that, because I was just now thinking it was actually the reverse of that! It just shows how differently people can see the same situation, I guess.

Some people don't take the internet seriously enough to be upset or offended by what strangers on there say to them. They have real life friends, and they have Internet friends/acquaintances, and they know the two are not the same at all. They don't get overly emotionally invested in online interactions simply because they know those interactions don't matter any more once they turn off the computer. They don't take disagreement or criticism personally on a message board because they know how impersonal it all really is.

Then there are the people who do cry over criticism or disagreements online, and they seem to take it all much more personally than the other posters do. They come onto a board and post incredibly personal things and get upset when people have differing opinions or don't seem to like them. If someone has a fulfilling real life, and actual real life friends, I don't understand why they would get so wrapped up in casual online interactions. I don't understand why they would care so much about the differing opinions of people they don't even know.

I agree with what you said. The people I was talking about are the ones who spend all their time digging up past threads and posts to prove their points.

I think people need to learn how to take criticism, but there a few a few, not too many, than take criticism to a whole new level. In real life most people wouldn't accept the words that are used, but here you can't call people out on it, you will get points.

 

[mhsjax]

The ones with no real friends are the ones who start a thread with, "I have nobody I can talk to about this ....".

No the ones with no real friends are the ones who have all the time to devote to pulling up past posts and quoting them to prove a point. No one wants to be around someone like this. The ones who say I have no one to talk to about this, may not want their real life friends to know what is going on. IMHO.

 

[ilovemk76]

No the ones with no real friends are the ones who have all the time to devote to pulling up past posts and quoting them to prove a point. No one wants to be around someone like this. The ones who say I have no one to talk to about this, may not want their real life friends to know what is going on. IMHO.

Then they are not real friends. A true friend will be there not matter what you have to tell them. If you are embarrassed to tell your friends things or you do not want to hear what they say then you are not a true friend either.

 

[furb & dez]

I also think we have become so self absorbed that we forget the good rule mom taught us. If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. I don't mean not expressing what your view but many of the other comments that people say.

What is the point of a discussion forum if you can't discuss anything?

Would you really spend any time on a forum where every thread was: "gee, I like Disney." "Me too." "Me too." "Me too." "Me too." ??

By the very definition of discussion, different viewpoints MUST be presented, otherwise it's not a discussion, it's a fan magazine.

Instead of "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all," perhaps a better phrase would be "don't post opinions or information for the public to see if you aren't prepared to defend them." No one has the right to not be offended by something. And freedom of speech does not entail freedom from criticism.

 

[mickeysgal]

Haven't seen an extended YAGE in awhile.

OP, this is the internet. These are strangers with a wide range of backgrounds and therefore, responses. Not all threads will have people holding hands singing Kumbaya in them. Sometimes the responses are a bit harsh/extreme, some too hand-holding, others are dead-on in their balance, and some responses do hurt because they strike a nerve with some truth to it. This DIS is a place where not everyone agrees nor should it be allowed that the responses are those that "are nice". That's a Pollyanna world.

It's up to you how you CHOOSE to respond. If you let it eat you up so much that you feel you need to start a thread like this, well then a break from the boards to get perspective is perhaps best.

Best wishes.

 

[Planogirl]

Why don't you go ahead and create a new persona? You can just post about Disney and leave the personal info out of it.

I agree that if you're going to tell a lot of anonymous people about your private business then you're bound to get a variety of reactions. You won't like some of them.

 

[mhsjax]

Then they are not real friends. A true friend will be there not matter what you have to tell them. If you are embarrassed to tell your friends things or you do not want to hear what they say then you are not a true friend either.

I agree, but others may not. Some just don't want their friends to know their business. ANd really this just goes to show another problem on the Dis boards, you can take one topic and twist it around and argue something else to death.

 

[mhsjax]

What is the point of a discussion forum if you can't discuss anything?

Would you really spend any time on a forum where every thread was: "gee, I like Disney." "Me too." "Me too." "Me too." "Me too." ??

By the very definition of discussion, different viewpoints MUST be presented, otherwise it's not a discussion, it's a fan magazine.

Instead of "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all," perhaps a better phrase would be "don't post opinions or information for the public to see if you aren't prepared to defend them." No one has the right to not be offended by something. And freedom of speech does not entail freedom from criticism.

Criticism in one thing, nastiness is another. Don't confuse the two.

 

[tefrench]

Wishing you the best, OP.

 

[spacemountainmom]

There are some good, some bad and some just plain crazy people on the dis. I remember very early in my posting days I participated in a thread about letting your kids spend some time away from parents at WDW. I posted about what we had done with our kids and one person quoted me and told me that I was a bad mom. She didn't say she didn't think what I had done was a bad idea, she told me I was a BAD MOM.

Now, them's some fightin' words in my book. I thought that was a pretty low blow to tell someone that they are a bad mom because they had allowed their children to go on a couple rides without mom and dad. However, I realize that this person does not know me, and really had no idea what kind of parent I am. I did not take her judgement personally. You just can't allow random people on the internet to hurt your feelings. I don't know if anything ever happened to that poster because in my mind, that WAS a personal attack.

It's been a few years now and I have to laugh because there is a thread talking about letting your kids have some freedom at WDW right now on the theme park page. Guess who still is preaching against it? On the plus side, I didn't notice her calling anyone a bad parent.

 

[Nancy]

There are some good, some bad and some just plain crazy people on the dis. I remember very early in my posting days I participated in a thread about letting your kids spend some time away from parents at WDW. I posted about what we had done with our kids and one person quoted me and told me that I was a bad mom. She didn't say she didn't think what I had done was a bad idea, she told me I was a BAD MOM.

Now, them's some fightin' words in my book. I thought that was a pretty low blow to tell someone that they are a bad mom because they had allowed their children to go on a couple rides without mom and dad. However, I realize that this person does not know me, and really had no idea what kind of parent I am. I did not take her judgement personally. You just can't allow random people on the internet to hurt your feelings. I don't know if anything ever happened to that poster because in my mind, that WAS a personal attack.

It's been a few years now and I have to laugh because there is a thread talking about letting your kids have some freedom at WDW right now on the theme park page. Guess who still is preaching against it? On the plus side, I didn't notice her calling anyone a bad parent.

I've been around a long long time here and yeah, you pretty much spelled it out in your first line. I pretty much learned early on what topics will trigger the good mom/bad mom stuff. I ten to type lots of responses and then delete because it just isn't worth it...people are going to say and believe whatever they want. I also don't post a lot of personal stuff on here. I do not ask the "what would you do" questions...heck, I don't even start topics ever anymore. I used to...but can't remember the last time I did.

I think I used to start a lot of topics when there was only a few boards here and not so many people. The bigger it got the more it got (for lack of a better word)


Still a lot of good people on here and a lot of good people are now gone for various reasons. You just have to remember that any time you post something here you open yourself up to other's opinions and comments and you really can't take them personal..and sometimes that is hard.

 

[happygirl]

Take care OP. This message board isn't for the weak of heart