Really don't like the holidays

[sonofanarchy]

Just a gripefest.

I'm just sick of the ridiculous commercialism of the whole thing. I've got 10 nephews and nieces. I have 3 kids of my own. I want to buy my kids presents for Christmas. I think it's ridiculous that we should have to buy for all the other kids, especially when my family judges everything by how much money you spend. Do a grab or something. And why should we be buying for 16 and 17 year olds? By that age, I had a job and was buying my own things.

Yes, I'm just a Scrooge.

 

[eliza61]

Not a scrooge in my book. I read some of the threads here where people feel that they "have" to get gifts for sisters kids or cousins, step kids, etc etc.
What always gets me is right after that they will say how the person doesn't keep in contact, doesn't make an effort to say thank you. nothing.

My siblings and I came to an understanding long ago. Each family takes care of the presents in their own family. end of gifts.

Ironically we have better holidays. Now when we get together, we plan family time. this year we are ice skating with the kids at riverrink in Philly. We make sure the cousins get together through the year.

I'm a scrooged also. Holidays are now about getting that jumbo tv on thanksgiving day.

My son just ask me if next year we can go on holiday instead, I'm looking into going to Portugal.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Just a gripefest. I'm just sick of the ridiculous commercialism of the whole thing. I've got 10 nephews and nieces. I have 3 kids of my own. I want to buy my kids presents for Christmas. I think it's ridiculous that we should have to buy for all the other kids, especially when my family judges everything by how much money you spend. Do a grab or something. And why should we be buying for 16 and 17 year olds? By that age, I had a job and was buying my own things. Yes, I'm just a Scrooge.

We don't do that. There are way too many kids in DH's family so you only buy for the ones directly related like nieces and nephews. And it's really only the little kids.

I feel like a Scrooge this year. Just not into it with DH being gone.

 

[goofyintoronto]

Im with you! Consider me a scrooge as well. I hate having to buy for all the ppl/kids in my family. I get stressed out thinking about the gifts and if theyre good enough.

I can relate about the judging....family is the worst for that. Thats why i get stressed, cause i feel that my gifts at times arent good enough. Im buying for ppl who normally spend $100 per person! I cant top that!

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Im with you! Consider me a scrooge as well. I hate having to buy for all the ppl/kids in my family. I get stressed out thinking about the gifts and if theyre good enough. I can relate about the judging....family is the worst for that. Thats why i get stressed, cause i feel that my gifts at times arent good enough. Im buying for ppl who normally spend $100 per person! I cant top that!

I told DH his brother has to stop having kids because this crap(not exactly the word used) was getting expensive! Lol!

 

[htmom]

Not a Scrooge! I feel very similar. My dh and I asked his brother if instead of gifts we could just take all the kids to a bounce place instead. Yeah, well his wife decided to buy gifts for our kids plus go to the bounce place! Yea! Now I get to find the cash for more gifts! Even though we already allotted a hundred bucks for the day at the bounce place. I am not happy.

 

[kirstenb1]

OP, I come from a big family too. A few years ago, one of my brothers drew up a chart that rotates every year. Now each of us is paired with one family. So now I only buy for the nieces/nephews in that family, and vice versa. Much less $$ and stress.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Just a gripefest.

I'm just sick of the ridiculous commercialism of the whole thing. I've got 10 nephews and nieces. I have 3 kids of my own. I want to buy my kids presents for Christmas. I think it's ridiculous that we should have to buy for all the other kids, especially when my family judges everything by how much money you spend. Do a grab or something. And why should we be buying for 16 and 17 year olds? By that age, I had a job and was buying my own things.

Yes, I'm just a Scrooge.

You don't "have to" do anything.

Does your family give your kids stuff? Then it is all good.

That being said this is the first year we are instituting not buying for the nephews.

I bought a gift for my parents and us sibs are chipping in.

With my own kids they are only getting a couple of things that THEY have picked out.

Yea, Christmas this year will be non eventful gift thing.

Keep you posted.

 

[joviroxx]

In our family, I have 3 siblings and between us, 12 kids. we do a gift exchange . Each family picks from a hat, 3 kids. So instead of 12, I only get 3. Works so much better even for the kids. They are better off with 1 good gift than 3 silly ones.

We don't exchange between the us (siblings). We also go in for a gift for my mom and for my dad.

Personally, I love getting gifts for my kids and nephews. I don't care how old they are. I really enjoy going out and trying to find the perfect something and see how excited they get when they open it.

Now, on DH's side, no one really does gifts except for his parents.

 

[SLP958]

I don't think that is Scrougy at all. That is too many to buy for.

Only 1 more week. You can make it.

Maybe next year you could have the kids all draw names so you don't have to buy for everyone.

 

[Disneylover99]

I can't stand the whole gift giving thing in my family too.

I don't want or need anything and neither do my kids, but I feel compelled to give to my nieces and nephews who are all late teens to mid twenties. I've tried to talk to my family about it and suggest drawing names but it gets me nowhere.

 

[sonofanarchy]

I can't stand the whole gift giving thing in my family too.

I don't want or need anything and neither do my kids, but I feel compelled to give to my nieces and nephews who are all late teens to mid twenties. I've tried to talk to my family about it and suggest drawing names but it gets me nowhere.

This is EXACTLY how I feel.

Wow. I didn't realize there were so many people who felt like I do about this.

 

[Wendy31]

Count me in too!

When it gets to the point you're either (1) giving out gift cards because you're no longer sure what your niece/nephew is into or (2) calling/texting the parents for specific gift ideas (what movie? what book?), it's time to rethink the niece & nephew gifting.

Together, we have 10 nephews & nieces ranging in age from mid-twenties to almost a year.

And all our kids are blessed & have plenty of "stuff" - I basically feel like we're just trading $20-$25 presents & gift cards. And it's just gotten to be too much. And, while, some years, the presents are good & "fit" the kids' personalities & likes, other years, the presents miss the mark - because when you don't see each other frequently, it's hard to know exactly what to get.

Plus, the grandparents always get the kids plenty, so I don't think they're going to miss presents from the aunts & uncles & feel deprived if we start doing things differently.

So I talked to my sister-in-law & suggested we do something else - maybe some kind of group activity or even bring toys for a charity or something. Well, she thought that was a great idea - except she wanted to still do gifts too.

So, now, in addition to buying presents, we also have to come up w/ money for the charity activity were doing. And I don't mean to sound "scrooge-ish" about doing something for charity! But I wanted to do it INSTEAD of presents - we really don't have the money for both.

And, on my side, my sister & I decided we'd get our kids books & journals - so we gave each other the titles of books that our kids wanted. Basically, we're trading books.

Oh! And, on DH's side, 2 of his brothers always get his parents very expensive gifts - way more money than we can spend. So we sit there while they open microwaves & computer laptops from his brothers after they've opened sweaters & restaurant gift cards from us.

So, yeah, I get it.

 

[aaarcher86]

I told DH his brother has to stop having kids because this crap(not exactly the word used) was getting expensive! Lol!

My Secret Santa gift to my uncle is a Visa gift card with a note that it is for his vasectomy copay.

Seriously. Stop procreating!

 

[Gumbo4x4]

We still buy for siblings and nephews, but it's a small family. I have 1 sister and DW is an only child. We have a total of 2 nephews. If there were more, it would be a different story.

For gatherings involving cousins, everyone brings 1 gift; and we play steal from your neighbor (or whatever it's called).

 

[skylizard]

My Secret Santa gift to my uncle is a Visa gift card with a note that it is for his vasectomy copay.

Seriously. Stop procreating!

That's awesome!

 

[skylizard]

My son just ask me if next year we can go on holiday instead, I'm looking into going to Portugal.

That's a great idea. DH and I did a vacation once over Thanksgiving and it was so nice and relaxing. No holiday stress. I keep telling him I'd rather do some sort of christmas vacation and have that as a present as opposed to anything material.
By the way, Portugal is a lovely country.

 

[goofyintoronto]

I told DH his brother has to stop having kids because this crap(not exactly the word used) was getting expensive! Lol!

LOL!!! Thats funny! I was thinking the same thing about my bestfriend. im the godmother to one of the two daughters. I hope to god they dont have any more kids than that cause im not sure i can handle it! Same goes for my sister! I want my xmas list to shrink, not expand.

I keep telling myself I will shop for gifts well in advance but I never do.

 

[Jaime4004]

Just a gripefest.

I'm just sick of the ridiculous commercialism of the whole thing. I've got 10 nephews and nieces. I have 3 kids of my own. I want to buy my kids presents for Christmas. I think it's ridiculous that we should have to buy for all the other kids, especially when my family judges everything by how much money you spend. Do a grab or something. And why should we be buying for 16 and 17 year olds? By that age, I had a job and was buying my own things.

Yes, I'm just a Scrooge.

Not scroogey at all! But if you don't like it, change it... That's what I did. Told both families that we were done with the bday/xmas gifts for extended family. Because as we all kept having more kids, it got ridiculous. It was both to save us money and to cut down on the amount of crap that my kids had. I'm pretty sure most were relieved, and everyone ended up doing the same. Grandparents always buy for the kids and we always buy for the grandparents. Then last year, when MIL asked what I wanted for my birthday, i kindly informed her (knowing that she does not have much money at all) that maybe she should stop buying for adults birthdays and save her money since we really can buy the things we want ourselves. She took me up on that, no more adult bday gifts...

 

[rszdtrvl]

I'm just sick of the ridiculous commercialism of the whole thing.

I hear ya!! And agree 100%!!

I really didn't want to do any Christmas shopping, except for DS. My heart was not in it this year.