lilia78
Waiting for Mickey
- Joined
- Jan 11, 2015
How long does it take to feel back to ‘normal’ after losing someone close to you?
A bit of background I am 40 years old and my whole life I’ve never lived farther than 8 miles from my parents. On July 30 2017 out of the complete blue we found out that my Mom had stage 4 cancer. She did what she could to fight it but because of the stage and where it was treatment was not much of an option and we were told by day 2 they would just be looking at palliative care for her. She was in and out of hospitals for a few months and did two rounds of chemo which didn’t work. In November she came home and on February 15 she moved into the nursing home for palliative care as it was to a point that we could no longer offer her 24 hour care at home. She passed away peacefully on June 1st with my older brother and I by her side.
It is now almost 5 months later and everyday I am still expecting to talk to her or see her. I also have moments where it feels as though I’ve fallen into a black hole and can’t get out. I cry multiple times a day and am extremely depressed.
While I know everyone grieves differently I don’t know if what I’m experiencing is normal or if I am entering a bipolar state. I was diagnosed as bipolar in my 20’s and am medicated. I do have a doctors appointment scheduled for next Tuesday to discuss this and other medical issues.
Thank you in advance for any words of advise or wisdom you may have for me.
A bit of background I am 40 years old and my whole life I’ve never lived farther than 8 miles from my parents. On July 30 2017 out of the complete blue we found out that my Mom had stage 4 cancer. She did what she could to fight it but because of the stage and where it was treatment was not much of an option and we were told by day 2 they would just be looking at palliative care for her. She was in and out of hospitals for a few months and did two rounds of chemo which didn’t work. In November she came home and on February 15 she moved into the nursing home for palliative care as it was to a point that we could no longer offer her 24 hour care at home. She passed away peacefully on June 1st with my older brother and I by her side.
It is now almost 5 months later and everyday I am still expecting to talk to her or see her. I also have moments where it feels as though I’ve fallen into a black hole and can’t get out. I cry multiple times a day and am extremely depressed.
While I know everyone grieves differently I don’t know if what I’m experiencing is normal or if I am entering a bipolar state. I was diagnosed as bipolar in my 20’s and am medicated. I do have a doctors appointment scheduled for next Tuesday to discuss this and other medical issues.
Thank you in advance for any words of advise or wisdom you may have for me.