No wedding thank you ~ WWYD?

[Searc]

One of our neighbor's daughters got married mid-September and we were invited to the reception. We attended and put our card with a cash gift in their card box. We spoke to the bride while there (it was a small reception, around 100 people), as well as her parents (our neighbors).

We have not received a thank you, yet. I could ask our neighbor, but I don't want it to seem like I'm saying "your bratty daughter hasn't sent us a thank you, why not?!" kind of thing. Because that isn't what I think, I'm worried they somehow didn't get our gift, but I'm feeling torn about broaching the topic.

WWYD?

 

[Moliphino]

I probably wouldn't even notice, to be honest.

 

[FreeTime]

When this has happened to me, I just ask, “I hope your daughter made good use of our gift. Did it help out with (moving expenses, trip, etc - whatever you know they may have had going on).

 

[C&Jx2]

How close are you to the neighbors? If you’re good friends I would say something like, “Hey! Did so-and-so get our gift? I didn’t any ”thank you“ card yet. It’s not a big deal, I just wanted to make sure!”

If you aren’t close enough to ask what can be a touchy question, I’d let it go.

 

[mjkacmom]

I don’t think there is anything you can do, but you put cash in the card? Why not a check?

 

[Searc]

How close are you to the neighbors? If you’re good friends I would say something like, “Hey! Did so-and-so get our gift? I didn’t any ”thank you“ card yet. It’s not a big deal, I just wanted to make sure!”

If you aren’t close enough to ask what can be a touchy question, I’d let it go.

We're more casual acquaintances, which is why I'm leaning towards letting it go. But I'll always wonder!

 

[fly girl]

One of our neighbor's daughters got married mid-September and we were invited to the reception. We attended and put our card with a cash gift in their card box. We spoke to the bride while there (it was a small reception, around 100 people), as well as her parents (our neighbors).

We have not received a thank you, yet. I could ask our neighbor, but I don't want it to seem like I'm saying "your bratty daughter hasn't sent us a thank you, why not?!" kind of thing. Because that isn't what I think, I'm worried they somehow didn't get our gift, but I'm feeling torn about broaching the topic.

WWYD?

I would be curios too. And I know myself all too well, I would ask.

The big thing is to be genuine that you are worried she didn't receive your gift. All in the approach. (On a side note it is odd you didn't receive a thank you, but maybe it got lost in the mail?)

 

[ponyboy]

I honestly wouldn't really care.

If it got lost then it got lost, not much that can be done. I also don't give gifts because I want to receive a "thank you". Even if I got a thank you card I wouldn't pay much attention to it.

 

[lorimay]

I get it, especially when you put cash in the envelope. I like to hand the card directly to someone rather than leave it on a gift table or put it in a box.
But I wouldn't ask.
I think Thank you cards are becoming a thing of the past, I don't agree, but it is, what it is.

 

[Hikergirl]

If it were me I would assume that the got it since it was put in the box, and that they either haven't gotten around to getting thank-yous out or they aren't sending them at all.

 

[gwynne]

I would assume they got the cash just fine.
I would not say a word. It's always best, to me, to avoid saying anything to a neighbor that could be interpreted as criticism.

 

[cluvsdisney]

I would have forgotten about it until I either received the thank you card or saw the couple. But around here, photo thank you cards are pretty common but take a while to have prepared. 4-6 months is not completely unheard of.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Beyond a bit of wondering if they got the gift and if they are doing thank you cards I probably wouldn't think much of it after that. I know the unknown can get one thinking but it's not something I would want to even casually mention in some way. I just wouldn't mention it and carry on.

I've actually forgotten before to that I attended something until I've gotten the thank you card. I actually did that with my cousin's wedding. His wife (to be) had a bridal shower where we filled out the envelopes ourselves and I kinda forgot about that whole bit until I got the card at some point down the road lol.

 

[barkley]

I get it, especially when you put cash in the envelope. I like to hand the card directly to someone rather than leave it on a gift table or put it in a box.

one of the guests at our wedding felt that way-handed the envelope to mil instead of putting it in the clearly labeled (and safely sealed) 'cards' box on the gift table. mil put it in her suit pocket................found it again over 2 years later when she was trying on the suit to wear to another event.

 

[NYCgrrl]

Etiquette says the bride and groom have a year to send out thank you notes.
I wouldn't worry quite yet .

 

[anniemae]

I would give it a couple more months. There is an old saying that you have a year after the wedding to send out thank you cards. With the holidays and everything, they may just be getting to sending them out now. I may something in a few months since it was cash and could have been stolen. It happened at my cousins wedding. Someone stole a bunch of envelopes.

 

[aprilchem]

Unless the wedding was in September of 2018 I wouldn't worry. The couple have a year to send out thank you cards.

 

[cluvsdisney]

Etiquette says the bride and groom have a year to send out thank you notes.
I wouldn't worry quite yet .

That's not accurate. Wedding guests have a year to give a gift but thank you notes are supposed to go out within three months or sooner if possible...this is according to Emily Post.

 

[_19disnA]

It's tacky to not send 'thank you' notes to those who gave a wedding gift. No one is that busy they can't take the time to send thank you notes shortly after they get married. While I probably would just let it go for a casual acquaintance, I also wouldn't send them any other gifts in the future if they can't be bothered to thank those who attended their wedding and gave a gift.

 

[AppleDumpling]

I think Thank you cards are becoming a thing of the past, I don't agree, but it is, what it is.

Sadly. I think you’re right. So many couples seem to spend a ton of time, effort, and money to make sure every last detail of their wedding is perfect, yet neglect to show gratitude. IMO, good manners never go out of style.

If you’re friends with any of the other guests, you could ask them about it. I probably wouldn’t say anything to the bride’s parents, unless they specifically brought up the wedding.

And as pp mentioned, in the future, give a check instead of cash. At least then you know if it’s been cashed.