A Question For Those With Children in a Child Care Center

[luvsJack]

My mother and I ran a child care center for 12 years. My mother needed to get out of the business due to the stress and her age so when my dd entered school we closed the business. At the time I did not want to take it solo because the long hours took time away from my young daughter and her father wasn't available due to work.

Now she is older and I am thinking of returning to the business. I know certain things I would like to do like general location, after school pick up services, age range, hours etc.

Here is my question:

Describe the perfect child care center. What would make a center "the" place you want your child to be? Name whatever your preference would be whether from your own prespective or your child's.

TIA for any and all input.

 

[nicki.momof3]

A colorful place with well educated adults that love and know how to work with children. An educational component is important as long as it is fun. Kids have many many years ahead of them of book work. Daycare / preschool should be fun, active, and loving. It should be a place my child wants to go - no crying about going.

A days care by our house (my kids did not go there - opened after we started school) has a cool webcam in the room that only parents can access from a website with a password and such. How cool to check in on your child anytime of the day. I would love to be a fly on the wall and watch my child play and learn during my lunch break.

 

[luvsJack]

A colorful place with well educated adults that love and know how to work with children. An educational component is important as long as it is fun. Kids have many many years ahead of them of book work. Daycare / preschool should be fun, active, and loving. It should be a place my child wants to go - no crying about going.

A days care by our house (my kids did not go there - opened after we started school) has a cool webcam in the room that only parents can access from a website with a password and such. How cool to check in on your child anytime of the day. I would love to be a fly on the wall and watch my child play and learn during my lunch break.

Your first paragraph sounds just like what I want. I like bold and bright when it comes to kids and yes, learning should always be fun.

And the webcams are a great idea! I like the idea that the parents can check on their child and their child's caregiver. It gives them that extra bit of reassurance that their child is being well cared for and is happy.

 

[Dee77]

My DD has been in a few very different variations of day care. Each has offered me a perspective that confirms how grateful I am that she is in the "school" that she is in right now.

The following is just from my families' perspective so keep in mind that I do realize that each type of center can offer variables that the one's we had did not. No flames please-

The in home day care my DD was in when she was 6-9 months old seemed very scattered and unorganized. I think the caretaker was in over her head and just watched the kids even though there were many of all different ages and needs.

The next one we sent her to was also a center and was better but I think I did not like that there was (IMHO) a rather significant age difference in children in her room. 3 months to over 2 years old. I always felt like the teachers would be overly busy with the younger kids, specifically when one or more of the younger kids was not feeling well or needed extra cuddling.

Then because I changed jobs she moved to another center that had a smaller gap in the ages of kids in each room which seemed much better but an overly aggressive child who bit mine on the face and then it happened again is what caused me to leave there. The owner/director did not seem at all interested in fixing the personality issue in the classroom but rather appease parents that had a longer duration of time there ($$$'s) rather than little old me.

Well the last face biting incident happened the day before we went to Disney last year and when I returned my fantastic neighbor scheduled an appointment for me to interview a new day care school. This is where my DD has been for just over a year now and I am so pleased. It is run with a small gap in ages for each grouping of children which I think is a huge factor for me. It is set up with a school format at 3 years old and I can't believe how much my DD learned at 2 from them and what she will for the next 2 years before kindergarten.

Good luck, I hope this helps. Feel free to PM me if you have any specific questions.

Dee

 

[luvsJack]

Dee, no flames at all; that is just what I am looking for. I wouldn't like those age gaps either, its just too stressful for the younger children.

We had our center set up before so that the ages where separated completely through most of the day. Only in the very early morning hours (we opened at 5:30) and in the late afternoon or for special events were they together. I know I had a few parents with siblings that said they preferred the ages together; but reading your posts reemphasizes to me the importance of the ages being separated.

BTW, getting bit in the face is very stressful for your child and for you. I don't blame you a bit for changing centers if the director didn't seem to want to deal with the problem.

 

[Bren's Mom]

My son is in a center that is ages 3-5 (preschool, prek and kindergarten classes) and afterschool care only. He just started in August (right before he turned 4). This center has an excellent reputation and I just love it so far.

Some things I like:

They use a curriculum approved by our area's school readiness council. Yes, it's play learning but directed play learning. They regularly meet with principals, k and other elem teachers, school counselors and psychs to learn what the kids need to know most when they get to k or 1st grade. They learn things (by playing) such as patterning, sequencing and sight words (readying for reading). And if kids are farther along than that they will take it to the next level.

They also work on independence skills. They have a hot meal program with a cook, etc. They serve breakfast, lunch and snacks. And they're served 'family' style. So the kids set the tables, pass food, serve themselves, learn to use napkins, and clean up. (They don't wash dishes, just scraping their plate and piling it in a bin.)

They have a 'parent council' that meets every other month after hours for parental input. And they really listen to the parents and implement our ideas!

They also have parties (like a Halloween party they just had) and other activities after hours for us working parents. Some things (like their Thanksgiving celebration that is next week) is during school hours...one guest can attend. And that's fine for grandma to go. But having things in the evening sometimes is wonderful, I get to really experience his school with him.

They do walking field trips. They walk to the church next door to see all of the flower beds in the spring, see how they're planted, identify types of plants, colors, learn how they grow, etc. They walk to the grocery store nearby and meet with the produce manager and learn about different veggies. They walk to the city hall that's nearby and meet with the local mayor. You have to be in the right location for this, but I think this is a great thing. (They also do regular field trips every few months, and also have people come in.)

They have lots of different 'areas' the kids can choose from. A reading area, a writing area, a craft area, lego area, music area (with instruments and a CD player), blocks area...that's all I can think of right now. They encourage books and music from home, anything the kids want to bring in.

They do a 'My day' report card each day. Just a quick check box kind of form that tells me if he ate all, some or none of breakfast and lunch. If he slept or not, how long. And then a little sentence or two telling me his fave parts of the day. (And noting if there were any minor issues I need to be aware of. For major issues they will call, although they never have needed to thankfully, or meet with me when I arrive to fill me in.)

 

[puffkin]

We have used 3 different places for DS and all have been fantastic for the age he was at the time. 2 were private and now he goes to a Tutor Time franchise which I absolutely love. It is pricey, but he is very happy there and I am too!

Things that I looked for:

1. Clean/organized. Labeled bins (with pictures) for EVERYTHING. Toys always put away after an activity. No piles of papers or supplies lying around.
2. Bright colors and "happy" feel.
3. Small age group gaps. Tutor time has them broken down into 6 month rooms until age 3.
4. Large playground with lots of room to run and equipment to play on. This was a big one for me! Plus, they spend a lot of time out there which I love.
5. Onsite owners who are involved.
6. Low staff turnover.
7. A basic curriculum, lots of art projects, and some structured play but not too much.
8. Snacks/Lunch provided. This was a BIG BIG BIG one for me. I did not want to have to provide food for him everyday!

 

[polynor]

Things that I looked for:

1. Clean/organized. Labeled bins (with pictures) for EVERYTHING. Toys always put away after an activity. No piles of papers or supplies lying around.
2. Bright colors and "happy" feel.
3. Small age group gaps. Tutor time has them broken down into 6 month rooms until age 3.
4. Large playground with lots of room to run and equipment to play on. This was a big one for me! Plus, they spend a lot of time out there which I love.
5. Onsite owners who are involved.
6. Low staff turnover.
7. A basic curriculum, lots of art projects, and some structured play but not too much.
8. Snacks/Lunch provided. This was a BIG BIG BIG one for me. I did not want to have to provide food for him everyday!

Pretty much agree with the above list. #5 and 6 are especially important to us since low turnover to us is an indicator that the staff is happy - if the staff is happy then the kids are likely happier and not subject to any stress from poor staff relationships. Additionally, it's very disconcerting as a parent to walk into the daycare and find new faces every couple of weeks (our first daycare was like that). Also, #5, should include managers. Our first daycare, we felt like the owner cared (but was not intimately involved in the operations) but her manager had an attitude and acted like she was still in high school gossiping and acting immature.
With #8 -- that was big for us too because of the convenience factor. It's also important that we can bring in breakfast and he can eat it there. When our current daycare first opened their new location they used a contract service for the food -- none of the kids liked the food and the parents thought it wasn't as healthy -- the owner switched back to cooking the food themselves for the kids (husband ihas culinary training and the kids (and parents) love his food).

I also like knowing both the calendar of activities/lessons as well as the advanced menu.

 

[MariDisney]

Within my work (behavior analyst for kids with autism) I am in and out of preschools and child care centers all day. I am continually amazed at the number of people working there who genuinely do not like kids and can be right out mean. I would say I see that in 50% of the staff members I encounter. I hear a lot of yelling, demeaning, etc. I'm sure it isn't done in front of parents, but it is so obvious to me and is sort of accepted in an unspoken way. I can't tell you the number of meetings I've had with directors about this. (e.g., kids made to keep their heads on the table for 30 min after lunch because they talked during a "silent lunch", etc.)

That said, my number one priority for my DD was a place where the people genuinely loved children and wanted to nurture each and every one. I wanted a place where hugs and sitting in teachers' laps were allowed. To me, the rest are the details and the easy part. Finding the right staff is the hard part.

 

[Sorsha]

I have seen daycares from both perspectives - as one working there, and as a parent having children there, and if I could make a perfect daycare, this is how I would describe it.

1. Big, colorful, well decorated. Kid sized furniture, and a good variety of toys. I don't want it to look like you just emptied out *your* kid's old toys in a box and plopped them on a shelf.
2. Centers. One for art, one for science, one for playing dress-up, etc. Also a seasonal center. Leaf activities in the fall, planting seeds in the spring, etc.
3. Things that keep the child grounded in his world. By this I mean a big calendar that changes daily (Today is Wednesday. The month is November. The weather is cloudy. Etc) Decorate for the holidays, and don't leave any out, but DO NOT teach religion.
4. Separate ages by rooms. Infants need a room, toddlers need a room, preschoolers need a room.
5. Serve meals family-style. Teach table manners, and allow kids to help set the table, take their plates to the sink afterwards, etc.
6. Have adequate, clean, fenced outdoor play area. Have plenty of toys. Use it daily unless the weather is just awful.
7. Have a TV area. Use it to show educational videos or allow kids to watch Sesame Street, etc. Do not have it on more than an hour or two each day. I don't mind my kids having a little down time with a video, I do mind it being used as the babysitter.
8. Have a dedicated circle time, and a dedicated rest time. Do not, however, insist that my child nap if she isn't tired or I don't want her to. Have an alternate quiet activity for non-nappers.
9. Finally, each day, send my child home with a "This is how my day went" paper. It is helpful, as a parent, to know what my child ate, how long she napped, how many poopy diapers she had, etc.

Good luck, and HTH!

 

[puffkin]

I have seen daycares from both perspectives - as one working there, and as a parent having children there, and if I could make a perfect daycare, this is how I would describe it.

1. Big, colorful, well decorated. Kid sized furniture, and a good variety of toys. I don't want it to look like you just emptied out *your* kid's old toys in a box and plopped them on a shelf.
2. Centers. One for art, one for science, one for playing dress-up, etc. Also a seasonal center. Leaf activities in the fall, planting seeds in the spring, etc.
3. Things that keep the child grounded in his world. By this I mean a big calendar that changes daily (Today is Wednesday. The month is November. The weather is cloudy. Etc) Decorate for the holidays, and don't leave any out, but DO NOT teach religion.
4. Separate ages by rooms. Infants need a room, toddlers need a room, preschoolers need a room.
5. Serve meals family-style. Teach table manners, and allow kids to help set the table, take their plates to the sink afterwards, etc.
6. Have adequate, clean, fenced outdoor play area. Have plenty of toys. Use it daily unless the weather is just awful.
7. Have a TV area. Use it to show educational videos or allow kids to watch Sesame Street, etc. Do not have it on more than an hour or two each day. I don't mind my kids having a little down time with a video, I do mind it being used as the babysitter.
8. Have a dedicated circle time, and a dedicated rest time. Do not, however, insist that my child nap if she isn't tired or I don't want her to. Have an alternate quiet activity for non-nappers.
9. Finally, each day, send my child home with a "This is how my day went" paper. It is helpful, as a parent, to know what my child ate, how long she napped, how many poopy diapers she had, etc.

Good luck, and HTH!

The center I use has every single one of these things! A big reason we love it so much.....great tips

 

[ajpa]

When my kids were little and I was working full time, the basic ingredient for me was trust.

My kids when babies were with a SAHM friend who wanted to earn a bit more and really treated my kid like family.

When they turned 2.5/ 3-ish they moved to a Montessori daycare. Again it was trust -- the owners had a great rep, put a lot of emphasis on maintaining their accreditation, I knew parents who had kids there (or graduated from there) and liked the program a lot.

In both cases I trusted the caregivers to behave appropriately and compassionately to my child.

So for me the perfect daycare is the one that other parents recommend highly.

 

[JennSaint]

Within my work (behavior analyst for kids with autism) I am in and out of preschools and child care centers all day. I am continually amazed at the number of people working there who genuinely do not like kids and can be right out mean. I would say I see that in 50% of the staff members I encounter. I hear a lot of yelling, demeaning, etc. I'm sure it isn't done in front of parents, but it is so obvious to me and is sort of accepted in an unspoken way. I can't tell you the number of meetings I've had with directors about this. (e.g., kids made to keep their heads on the table for 30 min after lunch because they talked during a "silent lunch", etc.)

That said, my number one priority for my DD was a place where the people genuinely loved children and wanted to nurture each and every one. I wanted a place where hugs and sitting in teachers' laps were allowed. To me, the rest are the details and the easy part. Finding the right staff is the hard part.

As a former preschool teacher I have to agree totally!!! I would visit other centers and was shocked how some teachers treat children. It was quite obvious they didn't like their jobs. I was lucky enough to work in a center where your second paragraph was exactly how we were!
At the top of my list is a loving nuturing environment where children feel welcomed and safe.
All the education in the world doesn't necessarily make you a good teacher. I took many classes with people who were working in centers and I would never allow my own children to be around them!

 

[dkbnyc]

i wouldnt want tv in my daycare- they get enough at home
i like mixed age classes- my girls have learned alot being with older and younger kids
good to have meals/snacks provided
good to have quiet time area for non nappers
good to have daily outside time and field trips
i like play based learning- very small kids dont need cirriculum but they should be 'learning' things like colors, numbers, songs, and how to be a good, polite , considerate person

 

[luvsJack]

Thanks for all the input!! With each post, I am imagining the design and placement of a center and the classrooms. I am also making an outline of policies and procedures.

Its funny that a few of you mention going into centers and seeing the kids not be treated loved. I work with mostly women and almost all either have or have had their children in child care. OMG!! The horror stories!! I am just shocked! When we had our center open, we worked very hard to make it be above the state standards, to have a curriculum that prepared the children for K and was fun for them, and we were very careful about our staff and the number thing was that they HAD to love being with kids. I assumed all centers worked on the same things, apparently not. I can now so appreciate that we really did a good job and am starting to really miss working with children.

 

[Mathfailure]

My children are done with this phase of life, but I used a few and was so overjoyed when I found the right fit for each of my children.

1. I liked the children getting outside everyday to play, not just walk in a line. A playground, could just be grass with toys like balls and trucks, was important to me. Even in winter, lived in New England at the time, the children went out bundled up and even had sledding (done safely!)

2. I wanted my child to be able to choose if she wanted to nap that day or not. No forcing the child to remain laying down and still if they were not sleepy. I removed my daughter from a center when they punished her for playing with her blanket at nap time. She never napped, did not since around 3 and she was alost 5 when this happened. Some children do not nap. One play for the nonsleepers would win me over.

3. I agree about providing the snacks and meals. I will gladly pay more for them, even if you have a set separarte price like at 'real' school. My children would try things at school and surprise me with what they would eat. This saves me time in the frantic morning, and eliminates the comparing of lunches that can go on.

4. I also loved one teacher who always managed to have projects for the children to bring home for the special holidays. I still have most of them as memories. Construction paper and pictures of my child. One of my son in a Santa hat sitting in a paper sled is a favorite. Cost almost nothing, and is a treasure.

And I agree with the needing to like and enjoy children. Not that a bad day can't happen to all of us, but if you are grumpy every day I pick up my child, and my child says you yell a lot, I am removing my child.

 

[MrsPooh]

I've been a parent for nearly 21 years but my first encounter with using a daycare center was just under a year ago. I feel very blessed to have chosen what I consider to be an outstanding center for my daughter.

Things that are important to me or that I really like:

Our daycare does not do fieldtrips. I always know exactly where my daughter is at all times.

They have outside people come into the center. The librarian and a farmer come each month for an activity with the kids. For an extra charge my daughter can take dance classes and gymnastics at the center from instructors who come in. She is building skills and I don't have to run her around in the evenings/weekends.

Meals are included.

Daily written reports come home telling what they did each day along with what was served for lunch.

They celebrate holidays (even Mickey's b-day this week).

They do outside activites occassionally. They organized apple picking on a Saturday morning last fall and had a great anniversary party last Friday evening. Perfect chance to meet other parents and watch our kids interact.

I'm not concerned that religion be a big deal but I do like that they pray before eating lunch. They did inform me of this before we enrolled.

At our center they have the tv on with videos showing for the 2 - 5 year olds early in the morning while everyone is arriving and breakfast is going on. Some days it is on very late in the afternoon when only a few kids are waiting to be picked up and they are usually doing puzzles or something similar while watching.

Our center has only newborn - 5 yr olds. I like this because then we don't have older kids getting rough with the little ones.

I'm not sure how things work in the back of the center with the under twos but 2 - 5s are seperated so that 2s are in one room, 3s in another and so on. Each room has no more than 10 kids.

The teachers gives lots of hugs and snuggles when needed. They also have magic kisses for boo-boos like mom does.

Threes and up do about two hours of preschool time each day, this includes singing, activities and table work. I'm very impressed with my daughter's progess. From talking to local educators their kids are very well prepared for school.

They all attend continuing education classes.

The owner has been the owner for ten years and is there every day. Many of the other teachers have been there for nearly that long as well.

I could go on but I'll stop. My only complaint at all is that I'm not always great at remembering special things - like pj day or teddy bear day and it would help if they'd put a sign up the day before. I think they expect me to remember from the monthly newsletter!

 

[esk]

I've been involved in the management of military day care centers for 16 years and a parent/customer for the last 8....at 6 different day care centers due to moves.

Some thoughts:
-- Dept of Defense guidelines are the strictests there is. But they are also (we're told) the model for non-DoD centers. NAEYC accredidation is a must or the centers are closed. Use NAEYC or DoD ratio guidelines; 1 per 4 infants, 1 per 12 pre schoolers, etc. (or use lower ratios!)
-- Pay your employees well. My sister managed a Montessori and a day care for Motorola HQ and she said the care givers were paid minimum wage, she was paid less than $20,000 and the turnover was horrific. Military day care wages start at $10.50 an hour, plus some benefits, for every caregiver. (Don't forget military subsidizes the centers by paying management salaries, all building costs, furniture, etc. Parents pay for room caregivers and food)
-- No TVs. Ever.
-- The webcam thing is a MUST. We don't have it, due to military rules on privacy, blah blah, but all the parents I know wish we did!
-- The sheets that say what your child ate, slept, pottied...those are so great. My kids stopped getting them after pre-toddler stage and I miss them. Also, a weekly food calendar is nice; I don't want to serve chicken for dinner if they ate it for lunch. You can even have the 4/5 year olds write their own, with lots of help.
-- Provide the food. Provide mats and sheets for the mats. My friends with kids in private day care pay over $1000 a month and still have to provide their own sheets and food.
-- Go outside EVERY day, twice a day. Our rules are something like below 32 and above 100, they don't go outside. And rain. But other than that, they are on the playground twice a day.
-- Invite the parents in for special events. We just did Thanksgiving lunch last Friday.
-- Have a policy for terminating the biters and violent kids. We had a choker and I had to make the decision to remove him from the program...that was a hard sell to his parents, but when one violent 4 year old is threatening the safety and well being of 20 other children, he's got to go.
-- Get a camera system that records, for at least 30 days, and SAVE THE TAPES! When a parent alleges something, you can look back at the tapes and prove it or not. We also used it to show parents of biters or bad-word-sayers how their children were behaving, because sometimes parents don't believe you. But tapes don't lie.

That's about all I can think of, I wish you the best of luck. Quality child care is in such short supply, I know I am blessed to have access to mine.

 

[kpgriswold]

Spotlessly clean. Trained, licensed, experienced providers. A posted daily schedule that includes physical activity, quiet time, creative play and reading aloud to the kids. Well lit, colorful classrooms. A fenced outdoor area away from the street. Healthy meals and snacks that meet USDA guidelines. And a teacher who communicates with me daily about how the day went and how my child is doing.