Angry Parents on Social Media

[backformore]

Parents' expectations of the school system have been a problem for a while. I was at a meeting a few years ago where a parent of a child with an IEP demanded that the district provide summer school for him. he was behind in reading level, and she worried he would regress further if he didn't have summer school. the district said no, there was no funding for a summer program. The teacher made some suggestions, including that the mom make use of the library, and that reading to her child 30 minutes a day would help his reading level, plus offered worksheets and suggestions for computer-based programs. the mother was irate, saying that summer was for fun and playing, not doing homework and reading!
That's the attitude that some schools face from parents - they want the schools to step up, but they're not willing to do so themselves.

 

[Dznypal]

I font know why some parents have kids in the first place. Actually where I live the more kids you have the more state money the mom gets so she get her nails and hair and designer clothes and the list goes on while the taxpayers have to pay more so her kids can eat. Isn’t up to the parents to teach their kids respect and manners and it’s the schools job to teach them reading math and other subjects needed to get a job and become self sufficient adults. But to sue a school system cause they don’t send food home on weekends is beyond over the top

 

[DisneyOma]

Yeah, our 4H program did the owl pellet thing - distributed the kits and then led the opening of them on Facebook Live. It was pretty neat.

But the thing is, even in the best of times many students don't have parents who are available, willing and able to teach them even the most fundamental things. We can't just write them off because of the pandemic. And these aren't the best of times. Even good, involved parents are overwhelmed right now by simultaneously learning to work from home and homeschool, maybe managing a loss or decline in income and the subsequent budget adjustments, almost certainly coping with higher bills on everything from utilities to groceries. And peer socialization does matter - we already have kids with almost no independence because we've become such a fearful society, and now they're being limited to virtual, parent-moderated social interaction. That's bound to have an impact, especially if it goes on (as many expect) through the next academic year. A year and a half may not be a long time from an adult viewpoint, but for children, it is an eternity.

But for centuries, parent-moderated social interaction was basically it, wasn't it? Kids didn't go off to school or have play dates, etc, until when?

I hope all schools are doing at risk assessments like our district is - we've got a database going for teachers to input which students are not responding to emails, showing up to the meets, or submitting work. That info is open to us all, so we can say that Johnny showed up to Geometry, and did an assignment, even if he hasn't shown up to French class or done any English for weeks. Guidance will call home to check on everyone to see how we can help. Allowances are being made for kids who are watching siblings, for example. Physical, mental, and emotional welfare of our students is the number one priority. We're exposing the kids to the curriculum we would have done is school, but a much thinner version. We'll backtrack and have a review at the beginning of the next year, and go from there. As a tutor, I'll be pretty busy then, I'm sure.

 

[Colleen27]

But for centuries, parent-moderated social interaction was basically it, wasn't it? Kids didn't go off to school or have play dates, etc, until when?

That was in a time when families were larger and extended families often lived together or in very close proximity, though, so kids had built-in peer groups. And if you're talking about a time before school, you're also talking about a time when childhood had a very different meaning and context overall. I don't think parents really started moderating their kids' social lives the way they do today, with playdates and having to meet friends' parents and such, until the last generation or two.

 

[tvguy]

So I say these things to set the stage because I am at this point just an observer and thus have no actual current experiences to share. My wife worries everyday and says something to me at least a couple times a day about the kids that are not eating properly with no school in session. Many kids at her school got breakfast and lunch at school. Many of her kids did not have home computers and she knows they are not getting any teaching as a result. She knows the kids that are already at risk are just falling further behind than they already were.

While they have had to modify the meals and how they are distributed, that program has continued here even with the schools closed. They push that program here hard because sooo many kids qualify.....something like 70% in Sac City Unified, and because less than half the kids who qualify take part. Oh, and because the district makes a lot of money on the program since the Federal reimbursement per meal is more than it costs to provide them.
They have handed out almost 20,000 computers, then discovered many of students lived in pockets of the city with no internet (ah, the digital divide). They were clever however, and outfitted unused city buses with WiFi and parked them in their neighborhoods as a mobile WiFi Hot Spot during the instruction day.

 

[tvguy]

Our district has had online learning for the last two years in anticipation of "snow days".

We have a few snow days in the school districts in the foothills around here. Not so much for the snow, but because it knocks out the power. So not sure how online learning would work here in that situation.

 

[Frwinkley]

3rd grade ELA teacher here. I notified a parent via email yesterday morning that their child was missing an assignment through our Google Classroom. At 8:30 last night, she emailed me to ask what assignment. I emailed her back right away and gave her the details. She chewed me out this morning because she said my answer was not specific enough. Not "thank you for answering my email at 8:30 p.m." I've told my other 3rd grade teachers that apparently I work the night shift.....

I think many, many parents are realizing that their children are not as "gifted" as they'd like to believe. It's very upsetting that some parents are just not willing to work with their kids (even under normal school circumstances). They expect every bit of learning to be done at school and when you offer suggestions for what they can do at home to help their child who might be struggling, some lash out. Well, I can't help you than.

I once offered after school tutoring; 3:30-4:30 two days a week. Parents had to come to school to pick up their kids. I cannot tell you the number of parents that were late week after week. When I'd call their cell phones, I'd get things like "oh, I'm just checking out at Target." Oh ok....

 

[Heather07438]

This NJ school district has about 10-13% who were previously qualified for help on the food plan. Last week they opened the school meal program to any students who sign up. It's breakfast & lunch and can be delivered. Well spent money for many reasons.

Most people haven't received unemployment yet, 6-8 weeks after filing. The state UEI system is choking on over 1m claims.

 

[CarolAnn856]

This NJ school district has about 10-13% who were previously qualified for help on the food plan. Last week they opened the school meal program to any students who sign up. It's breakfast & lunch and can be delivered. Well spent money for many reasons.

What a wonderful thing the district is doing! I’m involved with a food pantry at church and we’ve seen the number of people coming for food jump so much.

 

[Colleen27]

This NJ school district has about 10-13% who were previously qualified for help on the food plan. Last week they opened the school meal program to any students who sign up. It's breakfast & lunch and can be delivered. Well spent money for many reasons.

Most people haven't received unemployment yet, 6-8 weeks after filing. The state UEI system is choking on over 1m claims.

Our district is passing out weekly food bags - a gallon of milk and five days' worth of school-type breakfasts and lunches, including pre-packaged salads, heat-and-serve pizzas, etc. Which is a huge help because most of the food pantries in our area aren't operating right now - their volunteers are mostly high-risk retirees so they've made the decision to limit or suspend operations for the time being. I know families from my area who have been driving the 30-odd miles into the county seat for food distributions, often with no guarantee of getting anything because the pantries that are still operating are seeing miles-long lines of cars waiting and aren't able to serve them all.

Our UE system is in much the same shape. My sons both applied in late March; the one who only has one employer in his record got benefits relatively quickly, but the other just got approved yesterday and will hopefully have his first payment by the end of the week. And the self-employed program is running even slower, requiring a denial from the standard system that can take up to 12 weeks to get before you can even apply under the expanded qualifications.

 

[Delite]

It boils down to parenting. If your kids walks all over you =nightmare to teach them. If they have respect for basic house rules then it goes smoother. I see parents complain but not have any negative consequences for kids to listen. Also young kids need a physical activity to wear them down to even get them to sit still.

Some districts over burdened parents with work. I will always see that as attempting to prove the teachers salary is worth it. If it wasn't unions they could have gone without pay like most everyone else I know. End of year time and having parents spend hours teaching.... Sure..suuuuure.

Keep the lunch ladies handing out food.

All this griping to say, school better start on time. Government daycare is needed.

Popcorn cheers to the few I've seen melting down their kindergarten child will be passed over for Harvard if things aren't fixed.

 

[WorldWacky]

High school math teacher here. I teach in one of those districts where every student will get an A or an Incomplete at the end of the semester, and while I've come to terms with it (I don't think colleges are even going to look at grades from this semester anyway), there are a lot of people in our community who haven't. And I get that, too.

I teach in a relatively affluent community. Roughly 70% of the community has pretty easy access to tutors and the like for their math work. At least four of my parents are professors at local universities in the area in subject areas that require a strong knowledge of high-school-plus level math.

The piece that we, at least in my building, are truly struggling with is how we would possibly give grades in the first place. Right now, in our A or Incomplete structure, it's pretty easy to treat it as a Pass/Fail model, and even to be hard-pressed to give the failing grade.

But tests have proven to be a major sticking point. We have one student who hasn't passed anything all year... until the closure. Teachers in our school have suspected based on in-class performance that the dad has been doing this student's homework at home throughout high school, but could never quite prove it. There are students who have all but indicated that they would have their tutors take any tests for them. That's one of the larger equity issues that we face at my high school in all of this. When the college scandal broke out with affluent parents trying to buy their kids into colleges, students at my high school responded by wondering how many families at our high school had done that. Not if. Or shock that anybody would.

I’m hearing about this from my own children as well. My son’s grades have actually improved this last quarter. Why? Because I’m the “worst mom ever” (his words) who is making him sit down at the dining room table where I can see him complete all his work, answer any questions he may have and tell him to redo any work that I deem not good enough. He wanted to know why I couldn’t just write his paper for him like his friend’s mom did instead of making him go over it line by line to make sure his thoughts were the best they could be. Spanish? I’m reliving my HS days myself and feel like I’ll be fluent by the end of the year. Math? Forget it kid. If the videos your teacher made aren’t working for you, I’m sure we can find something on YouTube that will. Do I think some of his teachers will think he’s cheating due to his grades? Yep. But that’s okay. I know I’m doing right by him and he’ll be better prepared once we get back into the classroom. It does help that I’m a teaching assistant in a Life Skills class for developmentally and intellectually impaired 7th and 8th graders. I have the patience and experience to deal with a challenging student. I find it frustrating that parents are either doing the work for their kids or not requiring them to do anything at all. The teachers can only do so much and many have little to no way of making the students accountable during this. I can’t wait to get back into my own classroom and I’m sure my son can’t wait either!

 

[Heather07438]

What a wonderful thing the district is doing! I’m involved with a food pantry at church and we’ve seen the number of people coming for food jump so much.

Yeah, I was glad they made the switch. The regular avenues are overwhelmed and some people have no experience with where to turn. It's good to hear your pantry is still operating.

Our district is passing out weekly food bags - a gallon of milk and five days' worth of school-type breakfasts and lunches, including pre-packaged salads, heat-and-serve pizzas, etc.

That sounds efficient. Definitely helps for families in need with kids. Happy to hear your sons should both be seeing their checks regularly now. Must be a relief! I checked into FB the other day and for every post with someone asking about UE, there were 5 or 6 friends responding they haven't gotten anything yet either. No posts saying 'hang in there, I just got mine'. It's horrible. Our governor promised that everyone will get what they're owed eventually. He means well but my confidence depends on how long this lasts. We're just starting to slowly re-open and the current mindset is that conscientious social distancing and protective measures make a big difference in reducing spread. I hope so!