My favorite is "If your family tree does not fork....you might be a redneck".
Others I really liked
If your house has wheels and your car doesn't, you might be a redneck.
If your porch collapses and kills more dogs than they have at the animal shelter, you might be a redneck.
(that last one might not be exact, but the concept).
And someone (might have been here, might have been in a TR) mentioned here's your sign (Bill Engvall).
Drove into a gas station with a flat.
Person there: Joo get a flat?
Bill: Nope, I was driving around and the other 3 swelled right up on me. Here's your sign.
I watched a couple of those foursome tours - Engvall, Foxworthy, Larry, & Ron White. Hilarious.
Good to hear. Dude, IMHO, retire while you can. Get that started before anyone else can try to take it away or lay you off or whatever. The ever wise Steve Miller said - Go on, take the money and run.
To make a long story short, to get my sick time to show up on a computer screen, I have to jump thru hoops no one has ever jumped through before. Government bureaucracy at its finest. If I wait to September to file, those hoops automatically disappear. I'm planning to file Sept 1, with effective date Dec 31.
I think it's ok to worry about all 3.
I'm not sure it's really ok to worry about anything, but we are human and all do. I complain a lot about a lot of things, but those are mostly annoyances as opposed to worries. I really wasn't worried about my retirement or even the current job, it's been more anger and resentment and an overinflated sense of fairness and/or entitlement. Truly, I've worked since I was 13 cutting grass, and have always had money. As fat as I am, I've never been truly hungry or had to worry about where my next meal would come from. I read an article about the Depression, which reminded me than people endured for a decade or more before there was change. Life will go on.
Now, I get nervous when my children compete at sports, because I want them to experience that feeling of winning. I've been worried about my wife and children at times during both pregnancies, when it was life threatening. But, at my wife's hysterectomy, I wasn't worried. Hopefully, that means I've accepted that gift of peace.
Ok, so that's too much reflective thought for today. Time for fart jokes. Who stepped on the duck?
I prefer my taters hot. Schnitzel is just country fried steak and we do that better in KY. Father-in-law really liked it so when we traveled with them we always had to eat there. SWMBO always wants Cape May Cafe, and the kids wanted Chef Mickey.
Cracker Barrell has country fried steak and chicken fried chicken on their menu. What's the difference? I think the chicken is just a pounded chicken breast, battered, fried, and served with milk gravy. And, I like that chicken way better than the country fried steak.
WDW top 3 list for today is ........................ Top 3 retired Attractions (attractions nighttime spectaculars and parades excluded)
Get off my lawn!
Soarin (the new CGI version sucks)
Wishes
Fulton's Crab House
Backlot Tour Express
Snow White's ride
Mickey's House at MK
In 1987, was the ride Horizons in Epcot? That was cool. And, during 2000 at Epcot, there was a smaller subset of countries, one of which featured a simulator tour of Jerusalem. That was the first and only time I saw the Holy Land on a large screen.
