• Controversial Topics
    Several months ago, I added a private sub-forum to allow members to discuss these topics without fear of infractions or banning. It's opt-in, opt-out. Corey Click Here

Debt Dumpers 2023

Between the heat wave (no a/c, makes it miserable to do anything but breathe) and work, this week was a complete write-off.

Financially:
1. Keep the credit cards empty - DONE! Still using them and paying them off before they start earning interest.
2. Figure out a way to put some sort of extra on the mortgage, even if it's the $100 minimum - DONE!
3. Get some things I NEED to have (rims/tires for the car, items that need replacing at home, etc)
-Nothing this week. I'd planned to do some research, but got caught up with parental drama
4. Get a savings plan going for the big stuff that comes due in one lump sum payment (insurance, property tax)
-No savings, but I won my property tax dispute! I thought it should drop more, but I guess I'll take the win. They don't refund the money (I had to pay it all before the due date to avoid penalties) and instead hold it as a payment on next years. I'll have to watch that.

General stuff:
1. Make a will - DONE!
2. Continue to clear out the crap. I need to go through my clothes and that sort of thing. I got a pile done in 2022, but it really wasn't enough.
-1 bag of paperwork gone (shredded)
-Keep getting distracted from putting things up for sale.
3. Look for a new job. The reason nothing has been getting done is because I'm burned out from my existing job and I'm being severely underpaid for the work I do.
-Checked the email notifications and jobs sites daily. It looks like everyone is on summer vacation and not hiring. This week was really rough at work, but I can't just leave for an "unskilled job" (everything takes skills, but that's what they call them) for minimum wage.
4. Get my passport.-DONE!
5. Knock some half-finished projects off the list. Everything from making a scarf to some jewelry. Lots of stuff has been started, but not finished. Enough already!
-Worked a tiny but on one thing, but this is still way down the list.
6. Get into better shape. I'd like to say 'lose weight', but I'd be happy to be able to run up my own steps without getting winded. The weight loss may or may not come, but it's not as important.
-Did 2 "activities". I wouldn't call them workouts, but they were active
7. Spend more time with loved ones. I don't see friends/family much. I guess I really need to do #3 in order to facilitate this one.
-Met with friends once for an activity
-Went out at lunch time with co-workers for an activity
-Neither of these things are workouts, but I guess they beat sitting on my behind.
8. Organize my stuff!
-Went through some papers. That was even pushing my luck with the heat.
 
Hi all, poking my head in, I haven’t read for a while so will have to catch up and see how you all are. Busy summer for us with travel for family wedding showers and weddings. DS22 graduated from college in May and is heading back to finish up a masters this coming year and DS20 will be a junior in college so we’re starting another year of expensive tuition (on top of an expensive summer with our relatives’ weddings- we all needed dressy clothes), even though they’re at a state school. The 529 is going to run out this year bc we were not anticipating grad school for either one when we started planning years ago, but we’re making adjustments. I say “heading back” but they are both living in their off-campus house (which we have a 12 month lease for) this summer and have internships, so we’re lucky they’re happy, healthy and employed.

I‘m trying to eat healthier and reverse some weight gain and loss of flexibility that has come with being “of a certain age” so I started going to a yoga class once a week - it’s a new thing for me but I like it!

I hope everyone is doing well and hitting your goals, whatever they may be. 😀
 
Last edited:
August will be the first month I'll see the true bills for the new house and can finally put a real budget together.

We got a few amazing offers from our favorite casino in Vegas. Comped room, $1500 combined free play, $400 combined food credit. We had flight credits from when his dad passed and his flight delayed so bad he ended up having to cancel and just drive. It cost us $48 out of pocket to book the flights. So we're heading there in September!

I'm slowly gathering supplies for a side hustle. We're fairly sure we can live off hubby's income with some to spare and we've both wanted me to be able to stay home with the kids for a few years now. But I'd like to do something from home for fun and vacation money.
 


August will be the first month I'll see the true bills for the new house and can finally put a real budget together.

We got a few amazing offers from our favorite casino in Vegas. Comped room, $1500 combined free play, $400 combined food credit. We had flight credits from when his dad passed and his flight delayed so bad he ended up having to cancel and just drive. It cost us $48 out of pocket to book the flights. So we're heading there in September!

I'm slowly gathering supplies for a side hustle. We're fairly sure we can live off hubby's income with some to spare and we've both wanted me to be able to stay home with the kids for a few years now. But I'd like to do something from home for fun and vacation money.
Which casino is your favorite in Vegas??
 


August will be the first month I'll see the true bills for the new house and can finally put a real budget together.

We got a few amazing offers from our favorite casino in Vegas. Comped room, $1500 combined free play, $400 combined food credit. We had flight credits from when his dad passed and his flight delayed so bad he ended up having to cancel and just drive. It cost us $48 out of pocket to book the flights. So we're heading there in September!

I'm slowly gathering supplies for a side hustle. We're fairly sure we can live off hubby's income with some to spare and we've both wanted me to be able to stay home with the kids for a few years now. But I'd like to do something from home for fun and vacation money.
Not a bad deal for flights!

I would love to retire right now if I could, I'm finding it so hard to stay motivated every day. Unfortunately we wouldn't be able to live just off DH's income at this time.
 
We were able to get mom's car out of impound yesterday. When my mom got home she opened her mail and found 2 checks from Aflac for my dad's life insurance payout.
Y'all. All I had to do was email them the paper they sent and a copy of the death certificate. I did it a couple weeks ago and it was done and processed already. She put it off for 7 months because she said it needed so much stuff when it was literally one dang email. 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
In any case, she will deposit them today and then I can 1) pay off her car so no more chances of repossession and 2) deposit most of it back into the investment account she's been dipping into lately.
 
We were able to get mom's car out of impound yesterday. When my mom got home she opened her mail and found 2 checks from Aflac for my dad's life insurance payout.
Y'all. All I had to do was email them the paper they sent and a copy of the death certificate. I did it a couple weeks ago and it was done and processed already. She put it off for 7 months because she said it needed so much stuff when it was literally one dang email. 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
In any case, she will deposit them today and then I can 1) pay off her car so no more chances of repossession and 2) deposit most of it back into the investment account she's been dipping into lately.
Hang in there. To you it all sounds like simple tasks but for some people, grieving over a lost spouse is completely paralyzing, where it seems like even the simplest tasks like opening mail or brushing their hair, is all overlooked.
My dad was always in supervisor mode even after he retired and was always all about expediting things. Anything and everything. When my mom first died, he was still that way at first. He promptly changed her car title with DMV and changed his checking account to his name. He was crying all the time but still in “get it done” mode. As time when on he fell apart more and more. Part of this is early dementia which my mother’s death was like turbocharging the dementia.
Sometimes it gets me angry and I want to yell at him, but I try to remind myself that for him, grief has taken over his brain, and I’ll just need to do all the things that need to be done until the time he can take the reins again, if ever.
Some day, it may just be me in that position with mind-crushing grief, needing help from my kids. They are adults and have seen the instant change in their grandfather, so they are familiar with it.
 
Hang in there. To you it all sounds like simple tasks but for some people, grieving over a lost spouse is completely paralyzing, where it seems like even the simplest tasks like opening mail or brushing their hair, is all overlooked.
My dad was always in supervisor mode even after he retired and was always all about expediting things. Anything and everything. When my mom first died, he was still that way at first. He promptly changed her car title with DMV and changed his checking account to his name. He was crying all the time but still in “get it done” mode. As time when on he fell apart more and more. Part of this is early dementia which my mother’s death was like turbocharging the dementia.
Sometimes it gets me angry and I want to yell at him, but I try to remind myself that for him, grief has taken over his brain, and I’ll just need to do all the things that need to be done until the time he can take the reins again, if ever.
Some day, it may just be me in that position with mind-crushing grief, needing help from my kids. They are adults and have seen the instant change in their grandfather, so they are familiar with it.

That's the thing. This isn't a new thing for her, she's been this way since I was in high school. And if she would have just let me do all the things I'm doing now back in January, we wouldn't have had ANY of the issues we're dealing with now. But she insisted she was going to do it and I stupidly let her spiral out of control for too many months before I basically gave her no choice.
 
That's the thing. This isn't a new thing for her, she's been this way since I was in high school. And if she would have just let me do all the things I'm doing now back in January, we wouldn't have had ANY of the issues we're dealing with now. But she insisted she was going to do it and I stupidly let her spiral out of control for too many months before I basically gave her no choice.
Could it be depression? I’m no expert but I know it can give a person a severe case of the fuggits.
 
We're still in the middle of a heat wave here, so my place is holding onto the kind of heat where you're light headed and sweating just sitting still.

Financially:
1. Keep the credit cards empty - DONE! Still using them and paying them off before they start earning interest.
- I had to put a large amount on the card this week to fix my car. Hoping to pay it down quickly.
2. Figure out a way to put some sort of extra on the mortgage, even if it's the $100 minimum - DONE!
3. Get some things I NEED to have (rims/tires for the car, items that need replacing at home, etc)
-My car needed what should have been a $400 repair, but due to inflation it cost $1000! It had to be done, but it hurt.
4. Get a savings plan going for the big stuff that comes due in one lump sum payment (insurance, property tax)
-Nothing, all the money went to the car, and now I'll have to pay the credit card

General stuff:
1. Make a will - DONE!
2. Continue to clear out the crap. I need to go through my clothes and that sort of thing. I got a pile done in 2022, but it really wasn't enough.
-1 item gone
3. Look for a new job. The reason nothing has been getting done is because I'm burned out from my existing job and I'm being severely underpaid for the work I do.
-Checked the email notifications and jobs sites daily, but there don't seem to be any new postings
4. Get my passport.-DONE!
5. Knock some half-finished projects off the list. Everything from making a scarf to some jewelry. Lots of stuff has been started, but not finished. Enough already!
-Nada
6. Get into better shape. I'd like to say 'lose weight', but I'd be happy to be able to run up my own steps without getting winded. The weight loss may or may not come, but it's not as important.
-Did 2 short (10 minute) walks. Given the heat, it was nearly enough to do me in.
7. Spend more time with loved ones. I don't see friends/family much. I guess I really need to do #3 in order to facilitate this one.
-Went out for an ice cream with friends
8. Organize my stuff!
-Nothing. It's too hot to even do basic cleaning

My parents had to put down a put this week, and we all took it rather rough. We thought they were going to lose their other pet as well, but it looks like she's probably going to be okay. Between that and some health problems with extended family, I've been pretty distracted. It's been rough just getting through each day, but it looks like the heat should break this week and there aren't any pending emergencies (that I'm aware of), so I'm going to start making a to-do list.
 
End of July update:

2023 Financial Goals:
  • Pay off our Highlander loan (Roughly $19500 at the start of the year) - Just paid $900 towards this which should bring my total balance due to ~$1800. Hoping to have this paid off in the next few months. Also debating pulling it from savings to just pay it off and then pay myself back. We'll see though.
  • Increase my contributions to my "other" savings accounts (pets/gifts/CC fees). - Not focusing on this until I get the last little bit of our highlander paid off.

2023 Personal Goals:
  • Travel more - aiming for a trip 4th of July weekend (undecided on where), going out to Texas at least once, a cruise or a trip out of the country - Completed our 4th of July Texas trip, just came back from going camping over the weekend, and now preparing to go to a concert this weekend. After this weekend we have 1 more concert planned, a brew fest to attend, and I might try and squeeze in 1 more weekend camping trip as well. Once all those little things are done we'll be headed to New Orleans for our cruise. We also booked a weekend trip to Disneyland in December.
  • Finish replacing the fence that needs to be replaced - This has now been finished and it looks great.
  • Live life and be happy - I've averaged a workout at least 3 times a week in the month of July, sometimes 4 in a week. Life has been going ok/good so far, so no complaints.
  • *New* Look into how much a breast reduction will cost - I still haven't made the appointment for this yet. I keep going back and forth on spending this kind of money at the moment. So I guess we'll see what happens with this.
We've done lots of travelling in the month of July. Managed to also have a pool party a few weekends back. We're going to see the new Haunted Mansion movie tomorrow night and I'm pretty excited about it. I liked the movie with Eddie Murphy (which apparently is an unpopular opinion) and I wasn't sure how I felt about them "remaking" it, but I've come around to excitement lol.

Heading to see Simple Plan, The Offspring, and Sum41 this weekend. Should be interesting since I will probably know all of like 4 songs, but my husband is excited for it and that's all that matters. Plus I'm making him sit through the 50 cent concert in a month lol. I don't think I have anything else to really report on at this point. Happy end of July/beginning of August!
 
2023 Financial Goals

  • Car Payment – Pay off Cherokee DONE! The extra payments I had been throwing at the car will now be focused on the mortgage.
  • Mortgage: Reduce balance by 20%. Currently down 4%. Will start seeing some bigger increases in this reduction in August. If all goes according to plan, I should be down 21% at the end of the year.
  • Savings: Increase savings balance by at least 10% Current YTD growth is 16%.
  • 401K: Max out contributions. On Track based on current contributions.
  • Reduce year over year spending in discretionary budget by using a cash budget (includes things like Gifts, Clothing, Entertainment, Dining Out, etc). Still going well, at a 45% reduction in discretionary spending compared to this time last year. However, I have found that I am “borrowing ahead” quite a bit lately. For example, if I have already used up my cash budget for this week but still want to spend $40 on something, I go ahead and get it, but then reduce a future week’s budget down by $40. I am going to try August as a super low buy month so that I have a cushion of “leftover” cash and stop this habit. I didn’t have this problem in the first 3-4 months, and I think I can attribute that to two things: first, it’s summer – we get out and do more in the nice weather – I’ve put more of my cash towards eating out and entertainment. Second, I had a small stockpile of household, personal care, pet food, etc when I came into the year, but that’s mostly been used up so I am having to spend more in those categories now than I did earlier. I will have to take all of this into consideration for next year. But I really feel so much better about how I am spending and it’s allowed me to do a lot more than I thought. I am planning to do this for at least the next two years until my house is paid off.
2023 Personal Goals

  • Get a will drawn up (sigh - this has been a goal for 4 years running. Our youngest son turns 18 this year - so we will try and do this after his birthday) Not started but my cousin's son is a general practice lawyer and is back in our local area so the plan is to make an appointment with him.
  • Vacation – DS17 is graduating this year and I am really hoping we can take him on a trip this summer before he starts “real life” – nothing planned just yet. DH and I did a long weekend in Gatlinburg in May. My sisters and I were hoping to do something in September, but we couldn’t get our schedules to coordinate – but I decided to keep that time off and DH and I are going to do another long weekend somewhere. Still debating on what that is.
  • Get healthier – make better food choices and exercise. I yo-yo with this so much. I’ll have a couple good weeks, a couple bad weeks, and the cycles continue. Need another restart here in July August.
 
I need a new set of goals to work on to stay accountable, so here we go:

August 2023:

Keep credit cards paid off weekly
- this is how I roll. Otherwise, I end up with excuses and fees. And that's bad.

Make double payments on car - starting in August, doubling up on car payments. This will allow us to pay it off next year.

Start 401k - Well, this was a bust in the last job because the guy promised one would start and didn't. The new job (I start 8/7/23) will start 5% contributions next year, so I'm going to begin there myself to live with that paycheck.

Savings account - I have the old one from a couple of jobs ago. I am going to shovel $100 a paycheck that way, so $2,600/year to start. It's a small start, building from another small start, but a start. I'm more focused on getting the car paid off. Then the house.

Personal Goals:

Get the cut flower business to produce more - funny story here. I turned a hobby into a business that did so well that I put myself out of business because I don't have enough product. So I'm reworking this now to have a much better outcome next year.

Start working out - desk jobs are kicking my rear.

Hard look at 2024 goal to move - We'd like to move in with my mom next door. She has a huge house and is alone since my dad died. However, between us, we have 4 dogs and 6 cats. We need to look at having our kids take their animals and getting our friends to potentially rent our house, which would allow us to pay it off in 3 years or less. But first, we cannot do 6 cats. So, this is taking some compromise, since Mom doesn't even like cats and I love mine. Still a work in progress, but a long term plan to hash it out is best.
 
Our company did firmwide layoff today, thankfully my job is safe (for now) but it really opened my eyes. I guess I was in la-la land because I've worked for this company for 7 years and never felt like my job was in jeopardy...until today. It just reminded me that no job is safe and that I need to tighten up my budget and pad my emergency fund.

I was previously doing yearly goals but I'm moving to a monthly mindset as things are constantly changing

August Goals:
  • Stack Cash - Pad my emergency fund. I had decreased the amount I kept in there and used some recently. I'll be working to increase this to 6 months of expenses.
  • Reduce spending - I'll be canceling some unnecessary subscriptions to tighten the purse strings. This will require me to go in and cancel my gym membership. It's only $10 but I haven't been in months and they will only let you cancel in person (so dumb).
  • Reducing debt snowball/avalanche - I'll be making only minimum payments on my remaining debts and focus on padding the EF for the rest of the year. I have some credit card debt that I want to get rid of but I just completed a balance transfer for the highest amount to a new credit card to extend the zero interest period so thankfully that will not be accruing interest for 15 months. The others will be paid off in a few paychecks, thankfully.
Personal Goals
  • Dust off my resume - while our SVP said that the reductions they made today were made with hopes that no other layoffs are needed, I'm not ready to take their word. I need to be ready.
 
*New* Look into how much a breast reduction will cost - I still haven't made the appointment for this yet. I keep going back and forth on spending this kind of money at the moment. So I guess we'll see what happens with this
Don’t stress about the financial aspect of this until you have a consult with a plastic surgeon.
I work in breast imaging and meet a LOT of ladies who have a reduction. Most cases are covered by insurance. A plastic surgeon who commonly performs breast surgeries should be able to tell you if you’re a candidate for insurance coverage.

One of my coworkers had this done years ago and told me all about her consult experience. She said they basically had her stand topless with arms at her sides, and dont quote me but something like if they hang lower than her elbows or something in relation to her elbows. I forget that part exactly. They also visually compare breast size in proportion to the rest of the body and look for permanent indentations along top of shoulders from bra straps digging in.
Also they inquired about back or neck pain from the weight of her breast.
They should be able to get an answer from your insurance before being scheduled for surgery.

Don’t assume you’d have to pay everything out of pocket unless your insurance denies coverage.
Good luck! :thumbsup2
 
Don’t stress about the financial aspect of this until you have a consult with a plastic surgeon.
I work in breast imaging and meet a LOT of ladies who have a reduction. Most cases are covered by insurance. A plastic surgeon who commonly performs breast surgeries should be able to tell you if you’re a candidate for insurance coverage.

One of my coworkers had this done years ago and told me all about her consult experience. She said they basically had her stand topless with arms at her sides, and dont quote me but something like if they hang lower than her elbows or something in relation to her elbows. I forget that part exactly. They also visually compare breast size in proportion to the rest of the body and look for permanent indentations along top of shoulders from bra straps digging in.
Also they inquired about back or neck pain from the weight of her breast.
They should be able to get an answer from your insurance before being scheduled for surgery.

Don’t assume you’d have to pay everything out of pocket unless your insurance denies coverage.
Good luck! :thumbsup2
Thanks for the info! It's helpful. :) I know when I asked my OBGYN about it at my last appointment she told me that she didn't think Kaiser would cover the procedure unless I lost a bunch of weight. Mind you, I'm not an overly large person, but since they still go by the outdated (in my opinion) BMI chart my BMI number is too high for them.

I still want to at least go in for a consultation, I just need to find the time to make an appointment and see what happens.
 
Thanks for the info! It's helpful. :) I know when I asked my OBGYN about it at my last appointment she told me that she didn't think Kaiser would cover the procedure unless I lost a bunch of weight. Mind you, I'm not an overly large person, but since they still go by the outdated (in my opinion) BMI chart my BMI number is too high for them.

I still want to at least go in for a consultation, I just need to find the time to make an appointment and see what happens.
It can’t hurt to ask. The worst they can say is no. If you know anyone who has had it done, or even gotten breast implants, and can recommend their surgeon, that’s a good place to start.
FWIW, during the course of doing mammograms, my patients volunteer information every day. One thing ladies tell me without asking is that they regret getting implants. Not all do but often enough. Only once in 24 years did someone say she regretted getting a reduction.
Another coworker who had a reduction says hers are growing back. Part of that has been weight gain since becoming a grandmother.
 
Last edited:

GET A DISNEY VACATION QUOTE

Dreams Unlimited Travel is committed to providing you with the very best vacation planning experience possible. Our Vacation Planners are experts and will share their honest advice to help you have a magical vacation.

Let us help you with your next Disney Vacation!











facebook twitter
Top