Disney School Trip-Sick Child-School Policies ??

[sunb75]

Were you there as a chaperone?

If so, then the coach's decision makes sense. Parents would come, chaperone during the event or until the parents were ready to go, then take their kids and leave; leaving the event short handed.

For example, my DD#2's band trips required one parent for every 10 students. Students couldn't leave with parents after the trip, they had to ride the bus with the other students. It helped the band teacher keep track of who was where. The only times he made an exception were when one of the students parent (who was not chaperoning, just attending) received a call at the game that the other parent was in a car accident, and it was looking bad, so the teacher allowed the student to leave with the parent and once when DD#2 was injured while performing and we needed to go to the ER. In our case, I was chaperoning (in fact, I was in charge of the volunteers), but I had another parent who was just attending step into my spot and take over while we left.

The coach is in charge of the kids on these trips, and is responsible for what happens to them, even if the parent is there. That being said, he could have talked to you and made an exception with her being ill, but only to return to the hotel and not to go anywhere else. As far as having to stay in the room with the others, that is the coach trying to maintain control over the entire situation, not just the ill child.

Not a chaperone and all I wanted to do was take her back to rest in a bed by herself in a quiet room.

 

[sunb75]

Why didn't you take her back to her resort and remain with her there? You were not forced to stay at the theme park, it was a choice that you made.

Many groups/schools have requirements that students cannot leave to stay with relatives. Imagine someone goes with the relatives and then misses transportation back home. Too many risks for school districts to control.

Hope your daughter is feeling better!

You are right, totally my choice. My daughter is a rule follower and was told to be at the park to meet the team at 715. We also knew if she was in my room she couldn't get back to hers. She was worried about that.

 

[sunb75]

This was my first thought as well, why not go back to the moms hotel room and keep dd there with mom. OP said "staying in a room together was not an option." Why?

Yes, I had the room. Still do.

Hard to explain but dd is an extreme rule follower with severe anxiety. Not an easy combo.

 

[gotomu212]

You are right, totally my choice. My daughter is a rule follower and was told to be at the park to meet the team at 715. We also knew if she was in my room she couldn't get back to hers. She was worried about that.

I really think this situation wasn’t as clear cut as you think. You were really riled up in your first post, but I don’t think you were thinking clearly that day.

1 Why did your daughter think she couldn’t get back to her room? There’s uber and taxis and the resort bus. Sitting at the park when you knew she didn’t have to was all on you guys. You can’t blame the school.

2 From a coach’s perspective your daughter was fine to go to the park and only wanted to sign out at 7:00, the same time she was suppose to meet her team. I have been in the coach’s shoes and absolutely have sent kids back to rooms/told them to stay in rooms when they were sick, BUT I’ve also had kids that were completely fine for the fun parts suddenly sick when the team requirements started. I have told several kids if you were well enough to go to the team party for the last 3 hours you’re well enough for x (again I’ve had kids that really did get suddenly sick at the event and of course I sent them back right away, but Heather who starts telling me she’s sure she’s going to vomit but was riding rides 15 minutes ago? Not as much).

 

[sunb75]

This doesn't pass the sniff test to me. A child is well enough that she can spend at least 4+ hours in the parks between "vomiting events" and then at 7pm all of a sudden is too sick to back with her team till 10pm and needs to leave with her mother. It is not like this illness came on suddenly. I would think the OP would have had a very different answer if she had told the school after the first vomiting episode in the morning that her daughter was sick and they were staying in at their hotel. Instead, they spend the day at the parks while the child is sick.

While I think it outrageous that a truly sick child would not be released to their parents, I also have a hard time believing that the school would not release a truly sick child to their parents. I think there is way more to this story than the OP is presenting.

My Disclamer: I am coming from a very jaded perspective of being on the other side. On our team, Parents are given very strict rules very early in the season about when they can leave. I have heard every imaginable excuse and frankly some big lies from our parents who have scheduled different flights home or different arrangements than what was told to them very early in the season. Not saying this is what happened, but the perspective I am looking at this from.

If I were on the other side and a parent called me and said Suzy was vomiting all day, but we were at the parks all day, but she needs to be signed out early, I might also have said "no, if she was well enough to go on rides, she is well enough to spend the last few hours with her team." By that time, I would also have heard from numerous other parents about the offending parent's travel schedule and how they were trying to scam me. Again, not saying this is what happened, but it happens enough to make me question the real reason the coaches would not allow the girl to sign out early. And OP does say the rental car has already been returned 3 hours before the official release time. Why, if she knew her daughter was not to be released till 10? Why could Mom not go back to All Stars to watch over the daughter as invited by the coaches? Why was this not an option? Being a jaded coach, way, way too many inconsistencies with the story.

My daughter did tell the coaches in the morning she was sick. We were at the parks a couple hours in the morning. Back to the room for several hours to rest. Return to park and told coaches about 30 minutes after getting there that she wanted to leave. She was seriously trying to be 'brave'. She did tell several of her teammates she was feeling bad still and was going to head back once she got a hold of the coach.

The only reason for going back to the park was they were supposed meet as a team for fireworks. Again, trying to be brave. Upon telling her coach that she was back at the park, but feeling bad still, coach asked her to try and stay.

We were never given strict rules or many rules at all. I have asked for the school policies as they appear to be being made up as we go along.

Luckily I have emails and texts to back up everything I've said.

Would I have preferred my daughter stay with me for the trip? Yes, I asked and was told no, I accepted that answer. I also asked if my dd could stay longer. I was told by the coach to talk to the principal for an answer, which I did. He told me how proud he was of the team and that he hoped we had a good trip and excused the absences.

While I may not agt the with the rules, I do follow them.

 

[Action City]

I really think this situation wasn’t as clear cut as you think. You were really riled up in your first post, but I don’t think you were thinking clearly that day.

1 Why did your daughter think she couldn’t get back to her room? There’s uber and taxis and the resort bus. Sitting at the park when you knew she didn’t have to was all on you guys. You can’t blame the school.

2 From a coach’s perspective your daughter was fine to go to the park and only wanted to sign out at 7:00, the same time she was suppose to meet her team. I have been in the coach’s shoes and absolutely have sent kids back to rooms/told them to stay in rooms when they were sick, BUT I’ve also had kids that were completely fine for the fun parts suddenly sick when the team requirements started. I have told several kids if you were well enough to go to the team party for the last 3 hours you’re well enough for x (again I’ve had kids that really did get suddenly sick at the event and of course I sent them back right away, but Heather who starts telling me she’s sure she’s going to vomit but was riding rides 15 minutes ago? Not as much).

Regarding number 1, when my DD was on a school trip to WDW, they were expressly forbidden from leaving whichever park the group was in that day, until it was time to meet up at the end of the day. If the OP's daughter is a rule-follower, that is why she didn't go back to her room.

 

[sunb75]

Agree you shouldn't have taken her to the parks when she had been vomiting. That isn't considerate to other guests you exposed to her. It is really selfish to your daughter to take her to the parks. As a parent even if she said she felt better you should have said no-

I understand the being upset you couldn't take her with you but I'm sure there is a liability issue for the school. You should have just taken her with you and dealt with consequences later. I'd be dealing with talking to school and finding out what is wrong with my kid rather than posting here.

I agree, but sometimes parents make mistakes.

And before I posted here, I did comtact the superintendent, who was on the trip, but failed to answer his phone.

My mother was with me yesterday, she is an RN.

I posted here to get opinions. I appreciate them all.

 

[gotomu212]

Regarding number 1, when my DD was on a school trip to WDW, they were expressly forbidden from leaving whichever park the group was in that day, until it was time to meet up at the end of the day. If the OP's daughter is a rule-follower, that is why she didn't go back to her room.

Yes BUT she was already resting with her mom in a hotel room earlier the day. They had already let her take her daughter to her room and at 7 they told her mom she could take her again until 10. I’m still really trying to figure out which policy the mom objects to.

Reading between the lines it sounds like what mom really wanted was to sign daughter out of the trip and start their own extra vacation with the daughter staying in her room and not the team room. She also said she’d already asked if the daughter could stay with her during the trip and was told no, and that they were staying over for extra days.

 

[sunb75]

I don't agree with it but I'm sure some where little Suzy has pretended to be sick so her "uncle" would have to come pick her up and then they go off and do who knows what.

Luckily the coaches know my daughter and have witnessed her work her tail off through injuries and non-contagious illnesses. She is not a complainer and you could clearly look at her and see her lips were white, eyes bloodshot and watery.

Little Suzy is quite the rule follower and wants to do whatever it takes to please people.

 

[sunb75]

Why couldn't you take a bus to your resort then take her with an Uber to hers?

Or take her to your resort and text the coach that your daughter was sleeping and ill and that you'd meet them somewhere in the morning if she was feeling better.

Dd was told to meet at the park at 715 with the team.

I should have done things differently, yes.

 

[sunb75]

I really can't get passed the fact that this mom took her child to the parks sick. We aren't talking about the sniffles, sick. No, this child is throwing up.

Maybe it was good that the child couldn't stay with the parent. Hopefully the chaperone will make the girl stay away from others and get some rest.

Nope, the coaches put her in a tiny room with four girls where she slept with one girl. No rest at all. But they did recommend medication, which could have been deadly as she has several allergies and I specifically signed a form that she is not to be medicated. So, probably not the best choice.

 

[sunb75]

I

As a parent, you have the right to do whatever you want with your child. You would be free to take them home. I should clarify that I would tell them that if they did not return, under the circumstances presented, I would also be free to remove their child from the team. Nobody can force a parent to do anything with their child. But choices do have consequences. This would be their choice.

And no, I do not believe every parent is lying. But in my experience, the truly sick children with responsible parents would have texted the coaches right away to let them know that a member of the team was sick. Mainly because the team members have spent the entire weekend together in close quarters and to give a heads up to keep a watch on the other members. There is a certain team etiquette that is usually followed by both parents and coaches. And I clarified more than once that I was looking at it with a jaded perspective of some of the parents I have run into. I also said I would be horrified if a truly sick child was not released to the parents. We have excused many, many sick children. It is not in the team's interest to have sick children in the mix. I said "this" particular incident does not meet the sniff test.

I texted the coaches immediately after my dd called me saying she was sick.

I later learned several of the girls have been sick and made to be with the team and go to the parks.

 

[Mizzoufan]

Luckily the coaches know my daughter and have witnessed her work her tail off through injuries and non-contagious illnesses. She is not a complainer and you could clearly look at her and see her lips were white, eyes bloodshot and watery.

Little Suzy is quite the rule follower and wants to do whatever it takes to please people.

That probably true, but they can't allow one student not to follow the rules and and let another break the rules. I wasn't implying her duaghter was a bad kid.

 

[sunb75]

I understand school liability and policies, however, if my child was barfing all over the place at WDW, I would be:

1) taking child to Disney First Aid station (with CM assistance for extra documentation bonus)
2) emailing/calling/messaging the coach with steady updates
3) notifying coach and coach's superior/school principal/etc. that child is SUPER SICK (here are documented examples from Disney First Aid) and you are taking her back to hotel
4) taking care of my child
5) deal with aftermath later

being in the Parks while vomiting? EWWWWWWW no fair to everyone else!!!

Nope, she wasn't puking all over the place. She threw up in the morning. She slept. She felt better. She had no fever, no diarrhea.

No, I didn't make the best choice.

 

[sunb75]

Being with the team whether sick or injured is in support of the team. It's harsh, yet it's how it goes with these type of things and is well known upfront and in advance. The school would be liable if anything were to happen on their watch, including letting a parent take a child out in the middle of a school trip. Not only that, I saw so & so at the park, she was fine earlier, she must not be that sick or just wanted to come only for Disney with her mom. Believe me, they are indeed judging.

We stick to "day only" trips. No overnights. So we can have control as parents and our kids rather be with us. Maybe something to consider in the future. Hope DD feels better.

This is dd's first year on this team. It was not made known what should happen if a child got sick.

 

[sunb75]

That is exactly the way a responsible parent would act. Even just a single text in the morning saying "hey, heads up, Suzy just vomited, I will keep you updated" would be the courteous thing to do when Suzy has been with an entire team all weekend.

The response, at least from our team, would be: "Thanks for the update. Tell Suzy to get better. See you back in xyz." No further discussion needed.

And of course, everything is looked at on a one on one basis. Just sayin' the OP's story does not pass the sniff test. On every team my children have been a part of or I have been a part of, there is a common courtesy between parents and the team leaders, especially when the team leaders are responsible for the child. Taking an actively vomiting child to the parks till 7pm with no notification to the coaches or team till then and then saying that Mom cannot go to the hotel (was she banned from All Stars?) with the child would raise eyebrows. But I am also coming from a club perspective where contracts about absence and notification policies have been signed by the parents.

Coaches knew at 8:00 am that dd was sick. Dd was not in the parks all day. Only a short amount of time.

 

[sunb75]

Then why was she ok enough to be at the parks all day with just a nap in between? She didn't text her coaches till 7pm. Why? Why did she not text her coaches at the first vomiting event in the morning to let them know she was sick?

Sniff, sniff....Sounds way too familiar to me. In my jaded experience with a few of my parents, this would mean that they had made travel arrangements outside of the allowed schedule and thought calling in sick would get them out early so they could make their arrangements. But got caught by the other parents that they were in the parks all day so had to make up some strange story like taking the athlete to the parks all day vomiting.

Texted coaches at 8 am. Again at 7pm. Dd has several allergies and severe anxiety. Many things make her throw up. They know this. We thought that maybe it was an allergy or stress, but when the yucky feeling continued, we assumed/thought maybe virus.

Coaches already knew of plans. Not hiding anything from anyone. My plans with her didn't start until the following day, and no, I didn't want to have her early as I had (still have) quite a bit of work to do in the room.

 

[sunb75]

I'll give the OP the benefit of the doubt here. Maybe the dd did feel better, maybe they didn't know she was really sick, maybe she thought it was due to over indulging while at WDW. They go to the park, and it turns out she really is sick and now they know for sure.
Not every parent is out to screw the coach and the team.

Amen. My dd hopes to work with these coaches for the next two years and would like to maintain a positive relationship.

 

[sunb75]

Exactly. The more I read the OPs post, the more I don't believe it for a second based on past experience at out of state competitions.

She doesn't call the coaches till 7pm, 3 hours before sign out time? Why didn't she call at first vomit? Car has been returned? Athlete was out in the parks all day but all of a sudden she is too sick to go back to her team right before check out time? Mom has all sorts of reasons she can't go back to All Stars and take care of her daughter? She has to wait for another parent to take her back? That really doesn't make sense. My Coach/spidey senses cry foul, foul, foul.

I let coaches know at 8 am, about 3 minutes after I found out.

Not in the parks all day. For a couple hours and then back to my room to sleep. Back to park as it was a requirement by coaches. When dd texted them that she felt bad, they asked if she could tough it out (text evidence of this, too).

If anyone is interested, I have texts from my conversation with the coach.

Car returned by my mom who went back to the airport to fly home.

I'm not well versed in transportation options as I live in a rural area where they are it used often.

My room is at Shades of green. I asked about transportation from the resort to hers. I was told several different things and no one seemed to have a clear answer.

Did I make the best decisions? Nope.

Did I want dd early away from team? Nope, I had/have work I was hoping to do last night. It needs to get done. I planned to do it last night while dd was with team. I planned to sign out dd today and that was already shared with coaches ahead of time.

Nothing fishy. Excuses, maybe, but I was trying my best and looking back should have made different decisions. I don't think too well under stress or when tired.

 

[sunb75]

You send them to school when they have actively vomited in front of you in the morning? Your children are over exaggerating their illnesses when they are vomiting?

You wouldn't call the school the first time they vomited to let them know they were sick?

You would go out all day and do fun things with them while they were vomiting and then call an hour before the bell rings and say they are sick and expect an excused absence?

Nope, and I didn't do that either. Coaches knew a few minutes after I found out she was sick at 8am.

We didn't go out all day and have fun. We walked into the park. Sat down, walked more. Ignored the fast passes we had. Sat down. Back to my room to rest. Back to park because she was supposed to be there per coaches. And when she told then she wasn't feeling well, she was told to try and make it.