Gabby Petito

[DLgal]

I hope no one on this thread ever has to tell a family their child had died. Or for that matter, any loved one. I’m pretty blown away by some of the comments on here.

My husband had to do that numerous times, with really no training in how to do it. It is an awful thing to have to do. He is haunted by those experiences and has lingering mental health issues partly due to having to do that for 3 years as a Marine Corps officer during the height of the war in Iraq.

 

[DLgal]

The fact they haven’t stated a cause of death means almost nothing when you consider that the body has been out in the elements for possibly 20+ days. Unless it was a gunshot (which I don’t think anyone would expect) they wouldn’t be able to say anything definitively without an autopsy.

I think the boyfriend is guilty as guilty can be. Was it premeditated? Highly doubtful. Might have even been accidental. However, you don’t come home from a trip without your fiancé and then say NOTHING unless you have something to hide. I don’t buy the psychological break angle. This isn’t a movie or a novel, and such things don’t just happen out of the blue.

Have you ever intimately known someone with schizophrenia? I do. I had a college roommate with it. I had no idea. She was a grad student.. She seemed totally normal and gentle, caring, etc. She answered a roommate wanted ad I had placed after one of of roommates unexpectedly left college. Anyway, 2 months into living with her, I came home to find her naked and wrapped in a blanket absolutely freaking out. She looked at me and said "I'm so glad you're home. I know you're a witch and I am going to bite off your fingers and then cut your head off." I called 911 and went outside to wait in my car. She was taken away and I had a social worker come knocking who told me she is schizophrenic and they had been looking for her for awhile after she failed to check in for a scheduled wellness visit. She was NOT supposed to be "out and about" and had been living in a supervised mental health group living situation (voluntarily). A couple days later she came back with my roommate so she could collect her things and she apologized and said she doesn't remember anything but she was sorry because "they told me I scared you." So yeah, people can absolutely suffer a mental break and then later have no recall of what happened. It's far more common than you might think.

 

[mom2rtk]

Did I miss something? Have they mentioned a specific diagnosis for Brian?

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Did I miss something? Have they mentioned a specific diagnosis for Brian?

There was some discussion about information that was redacted in the police report on the day of the argument they had.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Have you ever intimately known someone with schizophrenia? I do. I had a college roommate with it. I had no idea. She was a grad student.. She seemed totally normal and gentle, caring, etc. She answered a roommate wanted ad I had placed after one of of roommates unexpectedly left college. Anyway, 2 months into living with her, I came home to find her naked and wrapped in a blanket absolutely freaking out. She looked at me and said "I'm so glad you're home. I know you're a witch and I am going to bite off your fingers and then cut your head off." I called 911 and went outside to wait in my car. She was taken away and I had a social worker come knocking who told me she is schizophrenic and they had been looking for her for awhile after she failed to check in for a scheduled wellness visit. She was NOT supposed to be "out and about" and had been living in a supervised mental health group living situation (voluntarily). A couple days later she came back with my roommate so she could collect her things and she apologized and said she doesn't remember anything but she was sorry because "they told me I scared you." So yeah, people can absolutely suffer a mental break and then later have no recall of what happened. It's far more common than you might think.

There's also a variety of mental conditions that can lead to strange things. I'm not saying the guy was under a mental condition during the actual event but you absolutely can 100% come home from a trip and not remember what happened or even how you got there to begin with. I know this couple took to the road deliberately but that doesn't mean they both were under sound mind when they made this decision or that something didn't happen on the road.

Now the not saying anything part I think it depends on the timeframe. People under fugue state for instance could go days or weeks or months under such conditions. I don't really know what to think of it all but this couple did struggle with things that our minds don't (he with anxiety and her with anxiety and OCD). He could be your average killer in what we consider at least and many of us are just trying to add in extra spins to the tale. But he or the entire situation could contain twists we just aren't aware of.

 

[mom2rtk]

There was some discussion about information that was redacted in the police report on the day of the argument they had.

But no mention of anything specific?

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Did I miss something? Have they mentioned a specific diagnosis for Brian?

The only thing I've seen is the him telling the officer during the discussion with him he and Gabby were fighting is that he suffers from anxiety but does not take medication for it

 

[Marrila]

I think we will eventually know more about who what where and when (and mental states, if applicable) but it's early days.
We may have to be patient.

 

[mom2rtk]

The only thing I've seen is the him telling the officer during the discussion with him he and Gabby were fighting is that he suffers from anxiety but does not take medication for it

Wow. Some are really making some leaps beyond that.

 

[prairie_girl]

I don’t buy the psychological break angle. This isn’t a movie or a novel, and such things don’t just happen out of the blue.

Yes, it can happen as the result of trauma. A relative stopped talking for almost a year and completely withdrew after her dad died. It didn’t start til about a month afterwards. She was in her 50’s so it wasn’t childhood trauma. It was a sudden death, and they were very close. It took a lot of therapy and I’m glad to say she has returned to her normal self.

 

[Heigh-Ho]

This isn’t a movie or a novel, and such things don’t just happen out of the blue.

You're right it's not a movie or a novel, it's real life with with people and with real life stressors. And things do just happen out of the blue. That's not a fictionalized part. People may want to think all that stuff is just things for the movies or a book but when you peel back the cover of mental health it's not a plot point, it's real world talks.

I don't know if Brian suffered from things or even if he did if that has anything to do with what happened but it doesn't do our viewpoint of mental health any good to shake our heads and say it just doesn't happen like that.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

But no mention of anything specific?

I saw a few things listed between the two of them in various articles that I read, ie severe anxiety, OCD and manic behavior. As I said, specific words were redacted in the police report, but these were words in the articles written by people who had presumably read the police report, as seen below. I’m not sure if the redacted words are the same as these words, or different. There are quite a few words redacted.

Police Report

 

[DLgal]

Wow. Some are really making some leaps beyond that.

The interviews with some friends have led a lot of people to think he was either bipolar or schizophrenic. Gabby's friend mentioned that he would have "episodes" where he would have auditory and visual hallucinations and would not sleep for days on end. The police used the term "manic" in their report, referring to Gabby. There were parts of the dash cam video that had the sound cut out while they were both answering questions about their medical conditions and medications. The cops felt that they both were exhibiting odd behavior and even wrote off the situation as a "mental health" rather than domestic violence situation.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

The interviews with some friends have led a lot of people to think he was either bipolar or schizophrenic. Gabby's friend mentioned that he would have "episodes" where he would have auditory and visual hallucinations and would not sleep for days on end. The police used the term "manic" in their report, referring to Gabby. There were parts of the dash cam video that had the sound cut out while they were both answering questions about their medical conditions and medications. The cops felt that they both were exhibiting odd behavior and even wrote off the situation as a "mental health" rather than domestic violence situation.

I was just coming to say that yes, I think the term schizophrenia came from Gabby’s reported friend (about Brian).

 

[DLgal]

You're right it's not a movie or a novel, it's real life with with people and with real life stressors. And things do just happen out of the blue. That's not a fictionalized part. People may want to think all that stuff is just things for the movies or a book but when you peel back the cover of mental health it's not a plot point, it's real world talks.

I don't know if Brian suffered from things or even if he did if that has anything to do with what happened but it doesn't do our viewpoint of mental health any good to shake our heads and say it just doesn't happen like that.

Thank you. My own father suffered a severe break from reality at the onset of his bipolar depression that landed him in a mental health ward of a German hospital with my mom having to make an emergency flight out there to get him. I was about 3 years old. Without saying exactly what he did, let's just suffice it to say it is not something ANY sane person would do, and that my father is a VERY intelligent man who graduated from a pretty prestigious university and graduate school and was working as a professional at the time. He was generally a geeky, quiet, reserved guy. His behavior was appalling, dangerous, and absolutely out of character. To this day, some 40 years later, he has no memory of what happened. All he remembers is that he was on a business trip and then suddenly he was in a mental ward and my mom was there to bring him home. It's crazy how your brain can literally malfunction on you and make you do things you have no control over.

This is why the court system has an insanity plea.

 

[VandVsmama]

I think he's probably got some sort of SMI (severe mental illness) which he SHOULD be medicated for, but doesn't (i.e., his comment in the police video where he says, "but I don't take medication for it").

I also know that for some people with SMI, it is VERY common for them to self-medicate with other 'stuff' (alcohol, illegal drugs). I did a 6-month internship in college at a psychiatric care home and every one of the residents there had multiple instances of problems with drugs and alcohol being used in order to deal with their symptoms.

One of DH's college friends took a couple of years off from college because of an onset of bipolar disorder. When he became ill, the guy had manic episodes which were so bad that he became psychotic, would hear voices, and he'd do really insane and dangerous things...things which, to him at the time, seemed very logical things to do. The guy has now been happily married for many years and has 3 kids and is a high school math teacher....and he takes his meds religiously. Never misses a dose. As he put it once, "I never want to be that sick ever again like that. That was really scary."

What's happened to Gabby is very tragic. The truth of what really happened will eventually come out. Eventually SOMEBODY will find Brian...they will either find his body or, if he's alive and hiding somewhere, SOMEBODY will see him and think, "Huh, he looks an awful lot like Gabby's fiance/boyfriend who they're all looking for" and that person will report what he/she saw to the authorities.

I and all of us here can sit here and speculate until the cows come home but we just need to be patient...which is hard to do because it's an emotionally difficult situation and people want answers.

I'll tell you one thing - there's been enough weird stuff happening in that little area of Moab, Utah lately that I don't want to go anywhere near there any time soon. No offense to anybody here who's from Moab, of course.

 

[LSUmiss]

So is the body confirmed to be her?

 

[Welsh_Dragon]

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_Esther_DingleyThis case received wide spread coverage in the U.K. Some parallels and, in the event, an accidental death, rather than a crime.https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_Esther_Dingley

 

[luv2cheer92]

So is the body confirmed to be her?

100%, no. But confirmed enough for the FBI to tell her parents that it was her.

 

[Kathryn Merteuil]

I am holding to the idea that her death was accidental. They could have been arguing and she did something foolish, or worse yet for him they were scuffling and she fell or something.

I believe that he was there, and he panicked and is afraid he will be blamed/charged. I just do not see him as a violent person. The truth will probably come out one way or another eventually.

It is just a very sad situation when one young life is gone and the other is likely destroyed.