Hobby ideas for tween girl

[Jennasis]

What does SHE want to do? What ae her interests? If she is into "screens" perhaps a coding class or something similar? Check your public library to see if they offer something like that.

Of course, unsurprisingly, my go to response is HORSEBACK RIDING...but that's just me.

 

[longboard55]

Agree pay attention to her interests, it is an extremely difficult age.

 

[Twilight Sparkle]

Of course, unsurprisingly, my go to response is HORSEBACK RIDING...but that's just me.

I was just going to type the same suggestion!

 

[Pea-n-Me]

My daughter is about a year and a half out of college. She did gymnastics and cheerleading until she was about ten. She was good at it, but shy, and they put her in classes with older girls, and she didn’t like it, so she quit that to take guitar lessons. She told me not too long ago she wishes she never quit. At the time I encouraged her to stick with it (it was great exercise) but I didn’t want to force her. Now I wish I encouraged her more or found an alternative program or something. Hindsight is 20-20.

DS, her twin brother, played baseball from TBall through college. The benefits to him were tremendous in terms of not only exercise, but developing discipline, teamwork, leadership skills, and self-esteem (he’s shy, also), all things that have already helped in his career. He had an immediate set of friends when he got to college, and the camaraderie with his teammates and coaches will be something that stays with him forever. It wasn’t all rosy, and there were times he thought life might be easier if he gave it up, but he stuck with it, by choice, and I think he was the better for it.

Take what you will from that. If she’s been playing softball for a while it might be hard for her to see all the people she played with continue on without her. I got to see a lot of softball teams in both HS and college and they seemed to be having a lot of fun together. Today’s teams can be tough though, way more rigorous and competitive than when I played. Maybe dig a little deeper to see what it is that is stressing her out, and see if there is anything that can be done about it - if she enjoys playing in general. As a pp said, if she needs help with hitting or pitching, some short lessons (30 mins) can make a big difference. Is she playing a position that she enjoys? Does she like her teammates and coaches?

Good luck, I hope she can find something that she enjoys.

 

[TwoMisfits]

She's almost a teen, so this is when you tell her what you want to happen - ie - she has a weekly (or daily - not sure how much time softball is) activity that involves either being with people or being away from the computer or both...and let her decide.

If she's not sure what to do, you can offer her some options. You can also let her know how much you're willing to pay for the activity. And then just give her some time (or even a deadline) to let you know.

Maybe she wants to volunteer at an animal shelter. Maybe she wants to take a cooking/cake decorating class. Maybe she wants to learn archery, fencing, hip hop, or swimming (all things done here by my girls). Maybe she wants to take a photography class or go on nature hikes. You'll know once she's willing to tell you.

I will also say - let her quit the sport if she wants to. I quit stuff as a kid at her age (and younger) - best decisions I made b/c I wasn't enjoying it. And I still found more things to do that were me.

 

[DLgal]

Does she NEED to do an activity right now? Does she have a good group of friends that you trust? If so, maybe just let her be. I always find it fascinating how parents these days (I am a parent these days) feel like their kids need to be doing "stuff" all the time. I can tell you, at that age was the one time I actually took a break from scheduled activities because I was just burned out from years of gymnastics, little league baseball, soccer, and music lessons. Between 11 and 14, I was enrolled in NOTHING and those were the years where I solidified the friendships that I still have to this day (in my 40s), by just doing typical girl stuff with my friends after school/weekends. You know, watching stupid tv shows, doing each others makeup, reading dumb teen girl magazines, listening to music, going to the mall, ice skating/roller skating, watching movies, etc. I got back into softball and swimming in high school, mostly because my friends were on the teams and I did it for social reasons, and had a lot of fun. But I really did appreciate those years where I didn't have any commitments. It was great. Maybe don't worry too much about "screentime" at this point and encourage spending physical time with friends.

 

[Imzadi]

A suggestion I have for when you approach her on learning some new thing, is to refrain from calling it a "hobby." On this thread, we know what you mean and what your intent is. But, since she's already feeling stressed at having to stick with something that she later realized she did not like after doing it for a while, she may feel pressured and stressed about trying something new, in case she's expected to stick with that too. She may resist trying new things or even learning about something.

Yet, how is she going to know what she likes if she isn't given a chance to try it first? And she may not like everything she tries. She needs to know she can stop doing something if she doesn't like it or when her interests change. Something becomes a hobby after someone does it for a long time and spends a lot of time loving it and automatically spending time doing it. Right now, they are just interests.

 

[ftbaker1313]

A lot of the things that have been listed on here while all are good, they all are pretty typical "girl" things. Maybe look outside the box at her interests. My daughter was about that age when she took up knife throwing. Her friends were kind of dubious to start, but after they tried it once they oftened suggested it has an afternoon activity. I'm just saying the world is open.

 

[slo]

A lot of the things that have been listed on here while all are good, they all are pretty typical "girl" things. Maybe look outside the box at her interests. My daughter was about that age when she took up knife throwing. Her friends were kind of dubious to start, but after they tried it once they oftened suggested it has an afternoon activity. I'm just saying the world is open.

Sounds fun….my DD wants to try axe throwing. There’s a local place that offers this and since my DH wants to try it too, it may be a fun thing for them to do together this winter.

I agree with lots and lots of different things to try - many options these days for kids.

 

[YoYoAurora]

How about photography? Lots of options there.

Just came here to suggest photography too.

Does she like to take photos with her phone or camera (if she has one)? If so, this might be a good suggestion.

No need for expensive cameras -- the cell phone and point and shoot cameras today have many options for the new photographer to learn and explore. There are loads of free tutorials and other free resources, including free photo editing programs and apps.

PM me if you wish. My Dad got me started at a young age. I set it aside for too many years, other than the occasional vacation or holiday photo, then picked it up again about ten years ago.

 

[Colleen27]

My oldest went through a couple of seasons where she said she was thinking about giving up softball when she was a tween. It was 100% a coaching/team issue - the local team was too casual and she got frustrated playing with a constant crop of first-timers and kids who didn't really care, but the travel program was too much time and pressure (and frankly, nastiness from overcompetitive parents) - and switching her to a middle ground league solved the problem. She ended up playing all the way through high school.

But as far as new hobbies for a tween, both of mine gravitated more toward individual over team sports at that age. The older got into archery through 4H. The younger started swimming, which is a lovely mix of individual performance and team socialization. They also both found animal-related activities attractive and relaxing at that age - they both show(ed) rabbits, the older learned to ride horses, the younger shows her cat and a duck that lives at a friend's house in the country, and they both did some volunteering at local shelters/rescue organizations.

There have also been a lot of phases as they've tried on different activities to see what sticks. They both went through the duct tape crafting phase. One had a rubber band loom. The other got into diamond painting. They both took up photography using a hand-me-down DSLR. The older paints her nails once or twice a week and has gotten really good at increasingly elaborate nail art, much of it inspired by online video tutorials. The younger one started cooking and baking after binge-watching too many cooking shows and following a bunch of food-related TikTok and YouTube creators, which was a delightful pandemic pastime and has the added benefit of giving me nights off from making dinner.

I second the suggestion I saw above to look into 4H. It has been really wonderful for both of my girls because there is a huge number of project areas kids can get into and the hybrid individual/club model encourages dabbling without feeling like you're "less than" or letting anyone down if you aren't the best at everything you do. Even in normal times, there was a mix of online and in-person exploration opportunities - my kids have done everything from online trivia challenges and animal care programs to in-person day and weeklong camps to a foreign exchange program - and right now, there's a lot of virtual content aimed at helping the kids connect with their project areas and fellow 4Hers through the pandemic.

 

[moniqueand2]

I'd encourage cross country, winter rec basketball league, tennis and/or golf as ideas for her to explore.
Also, baking for the family which could even expand into baking for others and selling on a limited basis (hot cocoa bombs, cake pops, cookies).
Or teen advisory board at local library.

 

[Sinder]

Just looking for ideas of things I can get my 12 year old daughter interested in that do not involve being online!!! She is on a travel softball team but seems to be losing interest and wants to quit after this coming season. She has some issues with self esteem and anxiety and says playing in the games stresses her out . She doesn’t want to do anything arts or crafts related or take any music lessons.
I am hoping she has a good ball season and changes her mind about that, but still looking for other options. Maybe something out of the box that I haven’t thought of?

When my dd was that age she got into theater and chorus. She kept with chorus all through HS. She tried a few different things but never really found her thing. She is 23 and still tries many things LOL

When my ds was dealing with self esteem and anxiety issues he got into track & field and cross country sports.
I was thankful that his coaches really emphasized being in competition with yourself. I think for my ds that motivated him- beating his times instead of trying to win for the team. He didn't feel like being slow, or making a mistake would cost the team their win. Technically it was a team but his coaches never made the kids feel like winning was the most important thing.

Having said that, I think it's good to let her explore what is out there that she may be interested in. If she has anxiety and gets stressed easily coming at her with a whole bunch of suggestions about what she should do may put pressure on her to find something in order to please you.
Good luck, that is a tough age for kids and us parents

 

[mefordis]

Thank you for your input and encouragement. She’s just going through a hard time in general and I’m not so sure softball has much to do with it at all. A lot of it is just her age/puberty etc. and changes in our family. We have had some bad experiences with a couple of teams and have joined a new team this season which I am very excited about. When she goes to practice she gets really happy and excited and talks about how much she loves it and hopes she can continue with them fo 14U. Then a few days later she says she doesn’t like softball at all and wants to quit. Mostly she says the tournaments are too stressful.
We have put so much into softball and I’d hate to see her give it up when I really think it is her “thing”.

What about lacrosse? or dance? At age 12 she can catch up to a lot of the kids who did these things for years. It's a good year to start something new.

 

[LuvOrlando]

Tough age, it's not easy, hang in there. My DD is an artist and loved painting things, drawing & especially adored pottery. There is a new kind of paint by numbers that is peaceful, I think it's called diamond art, simple and soothing IMO. Music can be fun too, a harmonica is a easy one. For physical you can look at ice skating and snowboarding/ skiing. Some just like to cook or bake, we had cupcake decorating classes for a while, probably at Michaels. Not all kids like group activities, some like to be more solitary and you don't see it until around now, in the teen years, when they get more in tune with themselves but then it's up against cliques, can be hard to navigate.

Kids are tough, I read somewhere that you need to calmly ask a kid a thing 10 times before you get a real answer & I think that might be true.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

Gardening (bad time of year, I know), crochet, LARPing, video games, comics, a musical instrument, um, I dunno...

 

[cobright]

Just looking for ideas of things I can get my 12 year old daughter interested in that do not involve being online!!!
I am hoping she has a Maybe something out of the box that I haven’t thought of?

Warhammer.
it’s a table top fantasy war game.
It’s a perfect hobby for a young lady. A little bit arts and craftsy because the armies are made up of little figures that each must be painted. Then you meet other players and compete with them in tournaments.

The warhammer community is usually really cool, with good vibes kinda enforced by the company staff at live events. But being a girl would add a bit of novelty to the meets and daughter will get a lot of positive attention (not the creepy kind)

 

[5Tulips]

Lots of great ideas. My suggestion would be to look into an active youth group, if that’s something to consider. Ours is very active and fun (per my kids) with weekly opportunities. Such as meetings, community service, holiday parties, retreats and/or mission trips.

 

[TippyThomas]

Geocaching

 

[leahgoogle]

My 11 year old DD likes science experiments. They have kits or good ideas online. It doesn't have to be chemistry stuff. Anything that shows how things work or if you manipulate a variable how it affects the outcome. She also is getting into photography.