Humiliated at the Reno Airport

[dogluva]

Not sure what bothers me more about this thread, that one poster thinks that a call to CPS would be an appropriate course of action, or that another poster thinks a 14 year old is to young to be left unattended. Good grief.

I am scared for the next generation. A 14 year old who can't be by themselves for five minutes is in for a rude awakening when she hits the real world.

 

[Polyluvr]

Eh, even the tears make sense to me.

I would have been stressed under the circumstances. I find airports and travel stressful anyway. Add four kids and a pile of luggage to worry about. A nasty dirty diaper that probably required a change of clothes and a near bathing in a public bathroom. Being forced to leave a few of the kids and the pile of luggage in order to deal with that somewhat lengthy cleanup.

And even knowing that my kids could handle 5-10 minutes sitting outside a bathroom in a public place, I would still have been feeling guilty about leaving them (it's what mom's do best, feel guilty about everything)...

I would have been more than a little stressed at that point. To then walk out of the bathroom and into a stranger who is essentially telling me I'm a sucky mom would probably have been the straw that broke the camels back.

Feel Better, OP. You may even laugh about this someday....

I too find travel w little ones and the luggage very stressful ~ I have traveled with 2 very overzealous boys by myself a few times~ that I needed a cry and a glass of wine when we got where we were headed!

but that agent would have gotten an earful from me ~ and then I would have had a breakdown ~ but only after I told her to mind her own beeswax !

OP~ you did nothing wrong~ I just think you would have felt better had you stuck up for yourself

 

[North of Mouse]

The OP said that her dh *dropped* them off with the luggage, then had to leave to park the car. She said they put the luggage *off to the side* then she went to find a bathroom. Sounds like they were still all *outside* to me.

Gate agents (security) are OUTSIDE, not inside. That indeed would have been a *dangerous* place to have left them. The *gate* security would have been in their rights to investigate the situation.

The story then changed - The OP said she was near a bathroom *inside*. I really can't see airport security (indoor) even noticing a brief situation like the OP is now describing, unless the children were causing a scene big time.

The story is *not* adding up

 

[luvmy3]

I am scared for the next generation. A 14 year old who can't be by themselves for five minutes is in for a rude awakening when she hits the real world.

The sad thing is that a 14 year old that cant be left alone, is probably not going to be allowed to be part of the real world.

 

[DizBelle]

Sure, because CPS has enough employees checking up on the children that are being locked in closets, beaten, and/or not fed by their caregivers that they can send their extras to look after the older children waiting for their mother to get out of the airport bathroom.

I read a story where parents took pictures of their kids playing in the bathtub (splashy-splashy, soap-mohawk kind of pictures). They took them to get printed at Wal-mart and Wal-mart called CPS and the kids were taken away from the parents and they didn't get them back for a month I think....

It does seem like CPS will get involved in ridiculous cases.

 

[North of Mouse]

I read a story where parents took pictures of their kids playing in the bathtub (splashy-splashy, soap-mohawk kind of pictures). They took them to get printed at Wal-mart and Wal-mart called CPS and the kids were taken away from the parents and they didn't get them back for a month I think....

It does seem like CPS will get involved in ridiculous cases.

I saw that story also, but the children were partially nude, and really didn't see that they were covered, or even using soap bubbles. They definitely *were not* sexually suggestive, and it's too bad they had to go through what they did. That employee was wrong, wrong, wrong. Just have to be so careful taking pictures of your children with just towels, etc. partially covering them.

 

[mnrose]

I am scared for the next generation. A 14 year old who can't be by themselves for five minutes is in for a rude awakening when she hits the real world.

No kidding. I babysat newborns at that age. Surely, a 14 year old can be left alone briefly in a public place. Many of them fly across the US (and some even globally) at that age unaccompanied.

 

[mnrose]

The OP said that her dh *dropped* them off with the luggage, then had to leave to park the car. She said they put the luggage *off to the side* then she went to find a bathroom. Sounds like they were still all *outside* to me.

Gate agents (security) are OUTSIDE, not inside. That indeed would have been a *dangerous* place to have left them. The *gate* security would have been in their rights to investigate the situation.

The story then changed - The OP said she was near a bathroom *inside*. I really can't see airport security (indoor) even noticing a brief situation like the OP is now describing, unless the children were causing a scene big time.

The story is *not* adding up

Have you been to Reno airport? It's small. You can be outside and the inside at the check in counter walking about 25 feet. I find nothing confusing about the story at all. Gate agents are INDEED inside the airport. Where else would a gate agent be? What would be the point of having them stand outside the airport? No gates there. I think you might be referring to the people who stand outside and check bags. Those are not gate agents, but baggage personnel. The people who are at the check in counter are the same people who go to the gates to check you in...and commonly called gate agents. Why do people always try to pick apart what people say?

 

[Traveliz]

The OP said that her dh *dropped* them off with the luggage, then had to leave to park the car. She said they put the luggage *off to the side* then she went to find a bathroom. Sounds like they were still all *outside* to me.

Gate agents (security) are OUTSIDE, not inside. That indeed would have been a *dangerous* place to have left them. The *gate* security would have been in their rights to investigate the situation.

The story then changed - The OP said she was near a bathroom *inside*. I really can't see airport security (indoor) even noticing a brief situation like the OP is now describing, unless the children were causing a scene big time.

The story is *not* adding up

The story didn't change. The OP said and I quote ". As we unloaded the suitcases from the car and into the airport, my dd (2) pooped in her pants. It was so bad that it was coming out everywhere. My husband had to move the car because of security, so I was left alone with all four girls and the suitcases. We moved everything off to the side, I sat the older three (11,10 and 4) down next to the suitcases and ran the two year old into the bathroom to quickly change her.

They were inside the airport and she moved the luggage off to the side while dealing with the baby and Dad did the car thing.

Liz

 

[chloelovesdisney]

This is the entitlement attitude that the security guard probably encounters all the time and what probably prompted some of the guard's actions.

It is NOT the security guards job to play babysitter. They are in charge of keeping the airport secure, not watching little children while their parents are in the bathroom. Especially since a PP already said that parents are known to just leave children in the airport to go gambling.

And this was a gate agent, not a security guard. Definitely not a babysitter.

I didn't say the guard or agent was a babysitter and don't think she should have gotten involved at all. Kids those ages can sit for a few minutes with luggage, in a near empty airport and be just fine. The guard/agent overreacted. I just don't see anyone giving the kids a hard time knowing how much security is around, and I also don't think it's a big deal for an adult to simply keep an eye out for kids they notice are alone. I keep an eye on kids playing alone outside, I'm not babysitting them, but if I saw someone hassling them I would intervene.

Btw, the other poster did not say kids are left in the Reno airport alone to go gambling, she said it happens in Reno which could be anywhere. Doubtful it's the airport.

 

[mdsoccermom]

The OP said that her dh *dropped* them off with the luggage, then had to leave to park the car. She said they put the luggage *off to the side* then she went to find a bathroom. Sounds like they were still all *outside* to me.

Gate agents (security) are OUTSIDE, not inside. That indeed would have been a *dangerous* place to have left them. The *gate* security would have been in their rights to investigate the situation.

The story then changed - The OP said she was near a bathroom *inside*. I really can't see airport security (indoor) even noticing a brief situation like the OP is now describing, unless the children were causing a scene big time.

The story is *not* adding up

Gate agents are not security, nor do they work outside. Gate agents are the people that work at the boarding gate.

Ticketing agents work at the check-in counters and can also work at the gates.

The people outside are the skycaps checking luggage.

 

[Scurvy]

I'm curious about why the gate agent even noticed the kids and luggage. The original post does make it sound like the agent was overly harsh but it also sounds like the original poster was overly sensitive.

Btw, the other poster did not say kids are left in the Reno airport alone to go gambling, she said it happens in Reno which could be anywhere. Doubtful it's the airport.

I haven't been to Reno in many years and I don't remember the airport at all, but I go to Las Vegas frequently. Last time I was there, I saw several children left alone in the airport while their parents were gambling at the machines. I only noticed because I saw their unattended luggage first, which was taking up multiple seats when almost all the seat were full. Then I noticed the kids wandering back to the bags, then over to the window for a while, then off somewhere else. Someone easily could have walked off with the bags because the kids weren't paying any attention to them at all. I finally figured out where the parents were when one came back and got a bottle of water out of a bag and then went back to a bank of machines.

Maybe the Reno airport doesn't have machines like the Vegas one does, but if it does then I imagine some parents probably do leave their kids unattended there to gamble as well.

 

[mamacatnv]

I'm curious about why the gate agent even noticed the kids and luggage. The original post does make it sound like the agent was overly harsh but it also sounds like the original poster was overly sensitive.



I haven't been to Reno in many years and I don't remember the airport at all, but I go to Las Vegas frequently. Last time I was there, I saw several children left alone in the airport while their parents were gambling at the machines. I only noticed because I saw their unattended luggage first, which was taking up multiple seats when almost all the seat were full. Then I noticed the kids wandering back to the bags, then over to the window for a while, then off somewhere else. Someone easily could have walked off with the bags because the kids weren't paying any attention to them at all. I finally figured out where the parents were when one came back and got a bottle of water out of a bag and then went back to a bank of machines.

Maybe the Reno airport doesn't have machines like the Vegas one does, but if it does then I imagine some parents probably do leave their kids unattended there to gamble as well.

Reno does have a gaming area - several out at the gates and a main area in the center of the airport.

I know they recently remodeled the ticketing area but unless they added additional restrooms, the closest restrooms are towards baggage claim and no where near the SWA counter. The SWA counter is at the far south of the ticketing area and the restrooms are at the opposite end - Like I said, they remodeled in the past 1.5 years and may have added restrooms.

Unattended luggage is a huge issue in any airport and is closely monitored. I don't understand why the SWA person reacted the way they did, especially after being told the Mom was in the restroom that by the OP's account was just steps away. None of this actually makes much sense to me, I am puzzled over the whole scenario

 

[NHdisneylover]

No kidding. I babysat newborns at that age. Surely, a 14 year old can be left alone briefly in a public place. Many of them fly across the US (and some even globally) at that age unaccompanied.

No kidding! DD flew cross country in the US at 12 and from Germany to Houston with a connection at 14. DS flew from Germany to London alone at 12. Now I would not do that with kids who have not travelled a lot to know the ins and outs, but not letting a neuro typical 14 year old alone for a few minutes while mom is in the bathroom is seriously overprotective

 

[mnrose]

Reno does have a gaming area - several out at the gates and a main area in the center of the airport.

I know they recently remodeled the ticketing area but unless they added additional restrooms, the closest restrooms are towards baggage claim and no where near the SWA counter. The SWA counter is at the far south of the ticketing area and the restrooms are at the opposite end - Like I said, they remodeled in the past 1.5 years and may have added restrooms.

Unattended luggage is a huge issue in any airport and is closely monitored. I don't understand why the SWA person reacted the way they did, especially after being told the Mom was in the restroom that by the OP's account was just steps away. None of this actually makes much sense to me, I am puzzled over the whole scenario

There is a restroom just inside the main entrance to the airport. the "main" entrance is approximately in the center of the building. Baggage claim on the left. Check in on the right.

 

[mamacatnv]

There is a restroom just inside the main entrance to the airport. the "main" entrance is approximately in the center of the building. Baggage claim on the left. Check in on the right.

Thanks, so the layout has not changed in regards to the restrooms. The SWA ticket counter where the SWA rep would have been is clear at the other end away from the bathroom (is that still correct?).
I am not sure how Mom parked the kids & luggage right outside the restroom but yet in front of the SWA counter

 

[mamacatnv]

Oops, double post

 

[ZephyrHawk]

By 11 I was flying solo and getting my own baggage. By 12 I got my mom's too because her bad back made it hard for her to lift things.

 

[padams]

I question whether we were told the whole story. The possibilities are 1) the gate agent is overzealous because parents leave their kids to go gaming at the airport, 2) Op and her dh were both gone for a long time (how long can it take to park a car at Reno and walk into the airport? 5 minutes? 10 minutes max?), and/or 3) the children were not up to the task of being left alone.

I wonder if the children were left within earshot of the gate agent. Were the kids discussing where are mom and dad? Did one of the kids approach the gate agent about mom and dad being MIA? I could see a concerned gate agent trying to help. (and I can see the kids not telling mom exactly what transpired in her absence). I don't see the average gate agent (and please no flames, gate agents of the world) being concerned from a distance about some elementary age kids and luggage waiting quietly for their parents. I have been in 4 airports of varying size in the past week across the country, and I'm having difficulty seeing the original posted scenario occurring in any of them.

 

[pixiewings71]

I agree. She was doing her job and looking out for your kids. Sorry that you felt humiliated and embarrassed, but looking back, I think I'd feel grateful that someone was concerned about the other girls.

Why would you ask your oldest child if you did anything wrong? I didn't put much faith in what my pre-teen kids thought. My husband's opinion matters more to me than what an 11-year old thought.

OP didn't ask if she had done something wrong, she asked her oldest DD if she and her siblings had done something wrong.

you cried? why would you cry?

holy stuff batman, stand up for yourself.. Why would you let some ticket agent bully you?

You are not going to get hauled off to some gov't torture chamber because you did the right thing..

Get the big girl panties on and stnad your ground..

Don't cry..

Really? Let me tell you, I can have my "big girl panties" on and be yelling right back at someone and at the same time bawling my eyes out. Why? Because it's how my body reacts when I get pissed, and in that situation I would have been pissed beyond belief that no one had looked in the bathroom to see if I was actually in there.

Based on the OPs super-sensitivity (stood there and cried, sat there humiliated and shaking), I'm not so sure the gate agent was as loud and irate as the OP made it sound. And I think the worst thing the girls witnessed was their mother not being able to stand up for herself, not that she got reprimanded by a gate agent. They learned that when something like that happens, the reaction to have is to cry and be humiliated instead of sticking up for yourself.

You can't say that's what they learned, no one will know that until it happens to them. She tried to explain the situation and the gate agent threatened to call security, she didn't want a conflict so she didn't fight back, yes she cried, because she was upset, I would have cried too.

Just got back from a trip to Reno with my family and I am having a hard time getting over what happened at the airport. It was about 9pm and the airport was practically empty. As we unloaded the suitcases from the car and into the airport, my dd (2) pooped in her pants. It was so bad that it was coming out everywhere. My husband had to move the car because of security, so I was left alone with all four girls and the suitcases. We moved everything off to the side, I sat the older three (11,10 and 4) down next to the suitcases and ran the two year old into the bathroom to quickly change her.

When I came out, the gate agent for Southwest Airlines was waiting for me. She said in a loud tone, "do you realize you left three of your children and luggage in an airport by themselves?" I tried to explain to her that my two year old had pooped in her pants, but she refused to listen to me. She told me that she had already called my husband and that security was next. Their were only four people in line, but I was so embarrassed I just stood there and cried. My husband then showed up and took over. I sat with the girls humiliated and shaking. It was late and we did not want any trouble so we just got the boarding passes and left. Unfortunately the girls witnessed everything.

I cannot quit thinking about what happened. Is eleven really too young to leave in charge of a 10 and 4 year old outside of a bathroom with luggage? I asked my oldest if they did anything wrong and she said no. I keep trying to let it go but I feel like this ruined our whole vacation.

I quoted the OP here, I did this because people keep saying she sat them by the SWA counter and then went to the bathroom which wasn't near the counter, but she didn't say that here. She said she put them off to the side with the luggage and went into the bathroom to clean up the baby, the SWA agent may have been leaving for the day, may have been walking to or from a break or lunch, or may have been just starting her shift. Saw the kids and over reacted. Yes, the employee over reacted. There is nothing wrong with kids those ages sitting outside the bathroom and waiting for their Mom. My kids have been flying since they were 6 and 9, I always just drop them off at the airport and let them make their way through security, it hasn't been a problem for quite some time now.

OP I don't think you did anything wrong, I would have done the same thing. I don't think your DD11 did anything wrong by telling the airline employee flight information either, I do think that employee was way out of line and you should report it to SWA.