Humor: Gay Agenda

[SeattleRedBear]

I know that many of you have heard Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, and others speak of the "Homosexual Agenda," but no one has ever seen a copy of it. I have finally obtained a copy of the latest iteration, directly from the Head Homosexual. It follows below:

6:00 AM Gym and Tanning Bed

8:00 AM Breakfast (oatmeal and egg whites)

9:00 AM Hair Appointment

10:00 AM Shopping

12:00 PM Brunch (Salmon Benedict, roasted potatoes, mimosa)

2:00 PM
(1) Assume complete control of the US Federal, State, and Local Governments, as well as all other national governments;
(2) Recruit all straight youngsters to our debauched lifestyle;
(3) Destroy all healthy heterosexual marriages;
(4) Replace all school counselors in grades K-12 with agents of Colombian and Jamaican drug cartels;
(5) Establish planetary chain of "breeding gulags", where over-medicated imprisoned straight women are turned into artificially-impregnated baby factories to produce prepubescent love slaves for our devotedly pederastic gay leadership;
(6) Bulldoze all houses of worship; and,
(7) Secure total control of the Internet and all mass media for the exclusive use of child pornographers.

2:30 PM Get beauty rest to prevent facial wrinkles caused by the stress of world conquest.

3:30 PM Protein Shake

4:00 PM Tea Dance

6:00 PM Light Dinner (soup, salad, and skinless chicken breast, with a crisp Chardonnay)

8:00 PM Theatre

11:00 PM Bed du Jour

 

[cstraub]

Love it!!!

 

[StormTigger]

Thank goodness someone posted that! I lost my copy and couldn't remember what time to be at the theater.

 

[Viki]

Aside from the tanning bed, that's my day!

 

[dkostel]

Wow, my Lesbian Agenda is pretty different (there is NO 6:00AM on it, shopping & haircut only take 30 mins total as Bo Rics is next to Walmart, & ball game replaces theater) but we do the exact same thing at 2. I'm surprised we've never run into each other, wanna carpool, my Subaru holds 6.

 

[Stacerita]

Well well well........now I know what all you are really up to. The homosexual agenda is just as I always expected.

 

[T&KHayes]

I guess I'm not the big 'ol Mo I thought I was! Up at 6? Gym? Egg whites? How am I gonna break the news to DP?

 

[Tony-NJ]

well I'm at the gym at 6. And no wonder I'm always so tired at 2:30

 

[mickeymousemom]

Wow, my Lesbian Agenda is pretty different (there is NO 6:00AM on it, shopping & haircut only take 30 mins total as Bo Rics is next to Walmart, & ball game replaces theater) but we do the exact same thing at 2. I'm surprised we've never run into each other, wanna carpool, my Subaru holds 6.

I'm straight, but according to my in-laws, my agenda around 2 o'clock is pretty much the same as yours

 

[IlluminationsUK]

Love it!

 

[james85]

its like you read my diary or some thing how weird!


lol