I have what my doctor affectionately calls "lumpy boob syndrome". It doesn't sound half as scary as the technical term! So I can relate to what you are going through. Each time, you think you will handle it OK, but each time turns out to be just as scary as the last. You never really get used to it. So being scared is normal, and normal is good!
My advice is to just keep busy so you don't think about it as much. If you are feeling overwhelmed, let yourself feel it and get those feelings out there. Keeping it inside creates stress, and that is not good for you. Take care of yourself in any way possible, and remember you have a LOT of friends here who are keeping you in their thoughts.
Let us know how it all turns out. We really care about you!