Is Mother's Day a Happy Occasion for You?

[Pacesetter]

I'm sitting here feeling down because I miss my own DM very much and don't have a close, affectionate relationship with my own DD right now (fingers crossed there is still hope for us). Tomorrow won't be a great day for me. How about you?

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I'm sorry you're feeling down. I hope you can connect with your daughter on some level tomorrow (well, today, now).

I am fortunate, I'm feeling pretty good about it. I'm getting to stay home and have a quiet day with my family tomorrow. My mother is still with us and I bought her some steaks and sugar free candy. (At almost 91, that's what she likes.) My niece is about to imminently have a baby so I'm happy for her and her DH.

I am sad for my DH and his father and siblings who I know are missing MIL a lot. And I have a good friend for whom this is a very difficult weekend - am thinking of her. I'm a little sad for anyone who's missing their mom. We just had the 30th anniversary for my father's passing so that's sort of still with me - sometimes it's hard to separate thoughts of your parents, they sort of go together, you know? I'm sad that two relatively young people I know have dementia and issues with both of them came up this week so I guess I try to appreciate what we have right here and now. I know there are lots of people out there also missing mothers or children, it would be nice if there was a way to connect...

 

[daemom]

It's bittersweet. I miss my mom so much--every day--but this special day has a big hole in it without her. My sweet is that my boys are close enough that they spend the weekend with us! That really puts the happy in any day in my opinion. We're also fortunate that we can visit with my 84 yr young MIL.

I hope you all have a wonderful day!

 

[Neesy228]

OP, I hope things improve with your DD. And to everyone having a tough day today -- my thoughts go out to you.

Today will be a little bit of both for me...we lost my MIL in December, so my DH and I are still coping with that day-to-day. So much is different and sad without her. Then, my neighbor next door has been involved in a long, painful game with her ex regarding their son. Recently, her son moved in with his father and is not speaking to her. She's completely devastated and I'm very concerned about her mental state.

On the other hand...my mother and I, while not close, are at least on speaking terms. Most importantly, I will be able to spend the day with my three children and my DH. We have no plans - other than they're making me dinner together tomorrow night - and I'm really looking forward to quiet day at home with everyone.

Happy Mother's Day to all of you exceptional Moms, Step-Moms, Grandmothers, Aunts and Sisters!

 

[ronandannette]

I'm not so sure what tomorrow will bring - I'm with you OP, on missing my DMom. She's 99 and still alive but languishing in a dementia-care facility and is basically lost to us now. She hasn't called me by name for a couple of years now and this year we made the hard choice not to drive 8 hours to see her on Mother's Day. I'm staying here because our closest friends lost their beautiful 17 y.o. twin sons 3 months ago and I want to offer whatever comfort I can. DH's Mom passed away 3 years ago but they were never close. My own DS is 19 and pretty self-absorbed right now - I'm not expecting that he'll put together much of a celebration.

 

[Maistre Gracey]

For me??? No. My mother is past.

That said, I certainly wish all the mothers out there a happy Mothers Day!!!!

MG

 

[kimblebee]

I feel bad because it almost feels like gloating now but yes, tomorrow will be a happy day for me. I will see my mom and have dinner with her and the rest of my family. We all live in the same city and see each other every week or two.

My daughter is 15 and still likes hanging out with me and still talks to me. She gave me a nice puzzle that I can't wait to do and we just spent the last hour on the last couch just talking and laughing til our sides hurt.

I don't want things to change but I know one day they will and that makes me sad and also makes me appreciate what I have now..

 

[ronandannette]

I feel bad because it almost feels like gloating now but yes, tomorrow will be a happy day for me. I will see my mom and have dinner with her and the rest of my family. We all live in the same city and see each other every week or two.

My daughter is 15 and still likes hanging out with me and still talks to me. She gave me a nice puzzle that I can't wait to do and we just spent the last hour on the last couch just talking and laughing til our sides hurt.

I don't want things to change but I know one day they will and that makes me sad and also makes me appreciate what I have now..

Nothing wrong with being happy! I hope all 3 of you enjoy your time together.

 

[superme80]

Yes it is. A bit of sadness as I am missing my grandma very much. She passed 6 years ago. I was able to celebrate with my mother today, and am being taken to lunch by my DH and boys tomorrow.

 

[Planogirl]

I have mixed feelings. My mother and I had a falling out many years ago and she never wanted to make up. She died with us still not speaking even though I was willing and that is sad.

However I'm terribly proud of my son so being a mother is nice.

 

[Christine]

Well, I never put much stock into these "days" that I'm told must be about something.

Yes, my mother is alive and yes, I have a daughter and we are fine. But it's just a day. We don't make a huge fuss about it. I do give my mom a gift and my DD with probably get me something, but that's all there is to it. I will be doing my normal Sunday grocery shopping and chores. Probably cooking dinner too and it will be a normal Sunday.

I guess I just don't get the significance of a certain "day" bringing someone so low or so high. I suppose it depends on how you celebrated the day in the past.

 

[jerseygal]

I wish all of you Moms a lovely day filled with much joy, happiness, and peace. Many of these holidays bring mixed feelings for many, those who families are estranged, those who have lost loved ones, those who's loved ones are suffering with poor health and illness, even those relationships which have become toxic and hurtful through out the years, so many situations. Treasuring that we still have my loving 93 year old Mom and so grateful for our two incredible sons.

 

[PollyannaMom]

Mine is reaching equilibrium. For years after my mom passed away, the sad parts of the day were "winning," but this year I have been able to concentrate more on being a mom than on not having one.

It helps that we're not doing a big picnic with DH's family - due to weather, people traveling, etc. My guys are just taking me out for breakfast, which is much less pressure.

Funny bit - they also declared yesterday "Pre-Mothers' Day" and helped with extra chores. I highly recommend this term!

 

[jdb in AZ]

I'm just going to stay home and do whatever. At church the sermons will be on how wonderful moms are -- kind of like a eulogy no mere mortal can live up to. The mother of all guilt trips, it's more depressing than inspiring, so I just boycott the services.

DH will fix dinner, and DD and the grand-goomers will call, so it's not a total waste.

 

[Shanti]

I like Mother's Day. It's nice to get some attention and respect for the work we mothers do for our kids, and a reminder to be always attentive to our own mothers.

 

[mjkacmom]

This is the first one without my mom, and if someone told me that last year would be the last, I wouldn't have believed it. She lived a mike away, and DH would always grill us dinner at her house.

My kids set the table last night for breakfast, and will do their best to make today a good day.

 

[Poohforyou]

I'm a mother and my mom, who I love, is still living. That being said, I think this day is way over hyped. My only request today is that I don't have to cook because it isn't something I enjoy. Other than that I don't need fuss.

I lost my dad when I was 8 so I know how it feels for others to celebrate an occasion when you're feeling a loss. Treasure every day with those you love.

 

[bbak30]

Yes, I'm very lucky to have my wonderful mom, as well as a wonderful mother-in-law.
I'm sorry that you are missing your mom, I'm not looking forward to that day. Hugs and prayers that you can rekindle with your DD soon.

 

[mom2rtk]

I have mixed feelings. My mother and I had a falling out many years ago and she never wanted to make up. She died with us still not speaking even though I was willing and that is sad.

However I'm terribly proud of my son so being a mother is nice.

I'm sorry.

But isn't it nice that we can have more than one chance in life at the parent/child relationship? I hope you have an awesome day with your son today.

 

[mom2rtk]

My only request today is that I don't have to cook because it isn't something I enjoy. Other than that I don't need fuss.

Right there with you on that!