I'm embracing the Mission Impossible theme song.. beat-box/instrument style. I've found in public restrooms, around the time it starts feeling exceedingly awkward, you are at just about at 20 seconds.. add on a few more beat lines to make sure you've reached the proper time. An example:
As you walk from the toilet to the sink, out-loud say "Good morning Mr. Phelps. Your mission, should you choose to accept it- remove all coronavirus particles from your hands."
By now you should be at the sink. As you turn the faucet on, give out a good "Tssschrawwwwwww.."
Now with your first two pumps of the soap dispenser: "Bump-a Bump-a..."
Hands under the running water: "BUMP BUMP, Bump-a Bump-a- BUMP BUMP"
Now bring it down, higher pitched: "Dig-a-da-roooooooo, Dig-a-da-roooooo, Dig-a-da-roooooooooooo, dum dum, Bump-a, BUMP BUMP.."
Continue.. Mad bonus points if you can enlist others washing their hands to hum out other harmonic lines of the song.
Then with a flourish, on the last beat, use your elbow to turn off the sink, then as you grab a paper towel, announce loudly "This message will self destruct in 5 seconds." dry your hands, use the paper towel to open the door, and as you throw the towel into the trash, make a loud flaming/fizzing sound. End with the orchestral "DAH-TAHHHHHHHHHHHH" (fading out) as the door closes. Mission accomplished.
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