Just wanted to say thanks for the post - and thank you to everyone who has posted here civilly with different viewpoints.
We're going in November, and even before this thread, I've been terrified that I won't be able to get refresh to work.
After agonizing over when to schedule my FP+, I went with a combination of late morning, early afternoon, and late afternoon on different days. We got the headliners we really want with the 60-day FP+, we'll use RD and EMH to try to secure the things we didn't get FP+ for, and then we'll try our luck at refresh. Maybe it will work, and maybe not.
I've been reminding myself that Disney, unlike Six Flags, isn't just about the rides. If I can't get a ride with FP+ and the lines are crazy, maybe that's a good time to see a show or get a snack. And now that my kids are older, they probably have better stamina to wait in standby than they did last trip, so that's an option, too, if there's something they really want to do.