Volunteering

[Mariearistocat]

Anyone else ever feel diminished and demeaned volunteering? I've been volunteering at our local animal shelter for almost three years, and pretty often because I enjoy it and love animals.
Last week I worked three days with the same two person staff. Day three last week, I had been asked by the director if I could come in and do an employee task as they were very short staffed and not having luck hiring. Sure! I got there at the time asked. The woman seemed completely annoyed by my presence. I asked where I could get started to help and she begrudgingly told me. This same woman the year before locked me out back with a dog as she left early.She asked if I have volunteered in that dept ever--umm yes hours ago and with you, plus with you two days prior. I'm also the person who went to the store and handed you the cleaning supplies you needed.
I am a good, solid strong worker and couldn't understand what her problem was. Seriously, it was to hose down kennels! 15 minutes in I was told to take a break. I decided to take a permanent one and grabbed my bag and told her good luck to you and left. She came running after me in the parking lot and begged me to not leave, she really needed my help. I went back in for the dogs and worked the next four hours. She was overly nice to me the rest of the shift (UGH) and kept telling me what a great job I did. Yeah, that's because I am a good worker lady. I also have an education and careerist prior to retiring to be a SAHM. Some of the other employees just seem rude, never a hello when they pass you in the hallway. This place is pretty much staffed 75 % by volunteers on any given day. I love the animals or I would tell them to pound sand.
The manager and director are always wonderful to me too. When I work, I show up on time, work hard and don't leave until the job is done.
Last year, I volunteered for an event with my teens at a children's museum. I had donated to the cause and couldn't wait to help. The women running it were very condescending to all of the teen volunteers, and me the only adult. I have regrets in not just leaving and only stayed for the cause, along with wanting to make sure all of the teens were ok. One girl told me she wished she could leave but her mom couldn't pick her up till later. It was all I could do to be treated rudely by these women in their low cut gowns holding drinks as they talked to us like peons.
I feel at my breaking point with volunteering. Back to the animal shelter, I know the shelter director well and composed and then deleted an email about last week. The woman who was rude to me more than made up for it, plus she's a hard worker and the place would suffer without someone like that. However, I can't help to wonder if any other volunteers have felt like me but never gone back?

 

[ronandannette]

Long post - very hard to read through it without paragraphs.

That said, don’t write an email. If you actually have a relationship with the director, go in and talk to her; heart-to-heart. There could be many reasons the atmosphere there has gotten tense over time but for non-profit organizations, it behooves them to provide positive and satisfying experiences for volunteers. Probably everybody just needs a little reality check.

 

[Mariearistocat]

Long post - very hard to read through it without paragraphs.

That said, don’t write an email. If you actually have a relationship with the director, go in and talk to her; heart-to-heart. There could be many reasons the atmosphere there has gotten tense over time but for non-profit organizations, it behooves them to provide positive and satisfying experiences for volunteers. Probably everybody just needs a little reality check.

Eeek! You are right about the (lack of) paragraphs. I edited a bit. I think I just did a brain dump to get out my frustrations. Anyway, I'm sure it's hard on these organizations to begin with. The job itself is physically and emotionally draining. Plus it's hard to find staff. Maybe some volunteers can be more work than help too. I have a feeling that woman assumed I was one of those or maybe didn't recognize me, even after working with her for a couple of years. It just made me feel awful. That my work is meaningless.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I give kudos to anyone who volunteers and/or works at an animal shelter. I used to volunteer at one near my high school and it was really difficult to see the cats and dogs sometimes knowing what they had been through. I worked with a dog that was petrified of males due to abuse. In any case I think that kind of place probably hardens and drains people fast. You may be right about a full-fledged worker thinking about a volunteer as more work than help but it's no reason to treat someone like that or be aloof with them without provocation. It's also a point that if it's hostile people who volunteer may be less likely to do so in the future even if the cause is near and dear to them.

As for the children's museum I get the impression the women you encountered stopped realizing the cause long enough ago, which is unfortunate.

It's probably worth talking in person about at the animal shelter. People who volunteer during this pandemic are so valuable and it doesn't take long for a place to get a reputation.

 

[sk!mom]

You may get more responses if you edit and add paragraphs.

That said, Yes, I have volunteered places where I didn't feel very welcome nor appreciated. Generally speaking, I would be once and done in those situations. Not volunteer but many years ago before I went back to work full time, I spent a semester subbing. There were several schools that I only went to once because I was treated poorly. Subs were in high demand, even then, and I had options so I took those schools off my list.

I would also go in and speak with the director. She needs to know what the experience is like for volunteers since they rely so heavily on that support.

We are in a time of extreme staffing shortages which results in stressful workplaces. I would imagine that it is very hard for nonprofits since their pay is typically low. Going forward, I wouldn't volunteer anywhere that I wasn't treated well.

 

[LuvOrlando]

I've always loved volunteering but, like anything else, it's a mixed bag because some people do just rot as human beings. I've been in the same position as you, some people get roles all twisted, just try to remember why you are there, and ignore the kooks.

If the people being paid are hostile to you maybe they think you are taking up a paying job, failing to comprehend the basic fact that many organizations don't have the funding for more pay hours. People in shift work, particularly those from big union regions, are very territorial about tasks in a way that people who are used to salary jobs just don't vibe. I've seen janitors get all huffy when volunteer parents clean so their kids can use the cafegymatorium for afterschool activities because kids shouldn't run in filth, go figure.

 

[SteveH]

I have volunteered with various organizations and I have no problem walking away when I've run into rude staff. I do understand that some staff feel threatened by a volunteer taking their job, I also understand that the vast majority of volunteer groups do not know how to train their staff or volunteers, let alone how to acknowledge and appreciate them. Many Directors have been promoted without training and really don't know how to run a non-profit or whatever they are in charge of. It's not their fault their heart is in the right place but the reality is that those type of places can also suck the soul right out of you.

As mentioned above have a conversation with the Director. Don't bash the employee but lay out why you are leaving. They will try to talk you into staying, but don't. At a minimum tell the Director you are going to take a 3/6/whatever month leave from volunteering. Give them time to learn from what you said and make adjustments. Then go find another animal organization that needs help. If you want to return that's up to you.

 

[tzolkin]

I can't help to wonder if any other volunteers have felt like me but never gone back?

They absolutely have. And, most likely, the site has no idea that's the reason because most people would never say anything. They may assume most volunteers don't return after their first day because the work is too hard or any number of other excuses and it has never even entered their minds that they may have a shortage of volunteers because they are not being treated properly.

You should definitely talk to the director. I would do it in a way where it's clear you're not simply complaining or trying to get this person in trouble, but that you genuinely care about the organization and want to offer some insight that may help them to retain future volunteers.

 

[Skippy918]

Non profits are suffering from the same staffing issues that businesses are experiencing. The workers sound like they are burnt out and taking out their frustrations on the volunteers. You sound like a fantastic volunteer who goes above and beyond. But you’re right, the staff attitude doesn’t help with keeping volunteers around.

 

[AppleDumpling]

I would not waste my time volunteering at any place where I was treated poorly or disrespected. If you want to give it another chance, go in person and speak to the director honestly about your concerns. Perhaps there are other ways you could support the organization, for example, by fostering animals or helping at offsite community outreach programs or fundraising events.

 

[fly girl]

Yes, it is awful when you volunteer your time and effort only to be treated horribly. I have never walked out, but there have been a few that I won't return to.

Like other posters have said, talk to the director personally. Explain why you are leaving only in hopes that it doesn't happen to other volunteers.

I don't know where you live but since you love animals, maybe you volunteer at another shelter that isn't too far away?

 

[kdonnel]

I have been mistreated by parents while volunteering in Boy Scouts. It is like the parents sometimes forget that volunteers are not paid employees.

My wife has run into the same situation when she was one of the PTA leaders and horrible treatment she received from parents.

I know those examples are not the same but they are examples of volunteers being mistreated.

 

[Jennasis]

I have absolutely been treated horribly as a volunteer. 15 years of dedicated service to a particular organization I adored and stayed in "for the cause" only to finally walk away due to their poor treatment of their volunteers.

 

[diznygirl]

Yes, unfortunately I’ve run into this problem as well. It’s hard on the volunteers when paid staff is being rude. These little old ladies don’t want your job, they just like helping the little kids! But then staff gets uppity, the ladies don’t come back, and the kids suffer. Our non-profit is struggling to survive right now.

We don’t have a solution. Apparently it’s hard to get employees, but volunteers are assumed to just magically appear out of nowhere.

 

[_19disnA]

You will probably run into rude bosses regardless of whether you are an unpaid volunteer or actually get paid to work at a business. There are lots of opportunities for volunteer work. I wouldn't stay at a place in a volunteer position if you are treated badly by others. Some bosses have big egos and don't see any issue with how they treat people. I would definitely let the person in charge know why you left. How you choose to let them know probably depends on a number of factors. Email is fine since then they have something in writing and the person in charge may not be anyone you have ever met. If you have already left, then nothing that person says to you will change your mind. They may also have to look into the situation you described if they weren't previously aware of any personnel issues. If enough people feel the same way, perhaps it will make a difference in how things operate in the future.

 

[Imzadi]

Really, really hard to read without LINE SPACES between paragraphs. Try hitting the Return key twice to create an empty line. If you are doing this on a phone, sometimes phones don't format right.

I know the shelter director well and composed and then deleted an email about last week. The woman who was rude to me more than made up for it, plus she's a hard worker and the place would suffer without someone like that. However, I can't help to wonder if any other volunteers have felt like me but never gone back?

Yes, I know what you mean. There is a general prevailing stereotype or mentality that people who volunteer are beneath the ones who applied and had to go through a process of being found to have the proper skills, experience, etc., to BE hired. So, they like to lord it over the volunteers, as though they have more abilities & brains than the volunteers who actually do the jobs for LOVE and NOT because they have to pay bills. That is their insecutity and/or snootiness. It's really a stupid mentality and actually shows their lack of intellect and people skills in this matter.

Yet, it is up to the head person to LEAD in how the volunteers are to be treated. I wish you hadn't deleted your email. (Unless you didn't paragraphize that.) The director needs to know what is going on behind her back and how the volunteers feel. Since you have a relationship with her and she believes you are a person of integrity, which you sound like you are, she will get to take your email into consideration and maybe peruse over it a few times.

She doesn't need to FIRE the working employees, but she does need to handle their attitude toward volunteers.

To say, "The woman who was rude to me more than made up for it," NO, she only made up for it because you left her to do the crap jobs. For all you know, she had OTHER volunteers whom she treated badly ALSO walk out. Too many people walking out on HER shift would be a red flag to the director. Think about the ones who STAY and are STILL continually treated badly. Just because she has now changed her attitude to you doesn't mean she changed for other volunteers.

Why do you think it's so hard to staff this place and they are not having luck hiring people? Bad reputations get around in industries. It could be that this worker or others are the ones giving that place a bad rep to work for, even paid. You could actually be doing the director a favor by letting her know what one of the problems is and WHY they can't get someone.

Rewrite the letter or ask to talk to the director in person, when she has some time for you. If she happens to call you again about coming in, that would be a time to broach her and say, you are hesitant because of what happened last time and how you walked out. Make it clear you do not want the person fired. But, that you care so much about the place that you feel the need to speak up. TELL her how you walked out. You were giving up a great place where you love the animals, but you couldn't stand it anymore. That worker making up AFTER the fact is not right. It really doesn't settle everything. And you didn't know that she would. You still left. The treatment was that bad.

Volunteer to speak up for those who can't. And for those who didn't because they didn't think they had the power to change anything. The director has a right to know. She can't make changes if she doesn't know what is going on.

 

[Mariearistocat]

Wow, so much great advice and commiserating on here. Thank you very much--and for also reading my wordy post. Ironically, today they were desperate for volunteers on this woman's shift today as two people didn't show up. It breaks my heart because I know many of the dogs won't get outside during this time, which is their first walk of the day. I might have had an hour to rush over there prior to picking up my kids, but just didn't go. I hate this guilt! I'm sure that woman is wishing I was there helping today, but so do the sweet dogs . I'm going to use a lot of the advice on here. Sorry that anyone else has felt this bad volunteering for causes too . If it weren't for being causes we really care about, it would be so easy to just never go back,

 

[JimMIA]

I volunteered for 5 years with the National Park Service and never experienced anything like what you've had. I received the same training the rangers got, did the same tasks, and it eventually led to a number of years as a seasonal ranger (although I had no intention of becoming one until I was thrown into it). NPS relies heavily on volunteers, and I was always treated with respect.

I certainly would not continue with what you've faced. The place you are volunteering is not the only game in town.

I also wouldn't waste my time trying to fix THEIR problems. They're not going to change who they are because one volunteer (or 20) quits.

And...you've got NOTHING to feel guilty about.

 

[neverlandsky]

.

 

[Imzadi]

Ironically, today they were desperate for volunteers on this woman's shift today as two people didn't show up.

Then NOW is the perfect time to send off an email to the director, as this illustrates why YOU walked away. While it may be a coincidence, the director can now look ahead (or back at the schedule) and see if other volunteers canceled or didn't show up on this person's shift.

I might have had an hour to rush over there prior to picking up my kids, but just didn't go. I hate this guilt! I'm sure that woman is wishing I was there helping today, but so do the sweet dogs .

I'm not sure why YOU are feeling guilty, unless this is just a commiserating/victimization/martyrdom, "Oh woe is me" thread. YOU didn't create the negative working situation. You DO have the power to create change in a more effective way than walking the dogs for one shift, when you send the email.

As for the dogs, it's better that they suffer for one shift while you take that time to re-write a letter that helps everyone in the long term. That is like taking a bucket to bail water out of a sinking boat, instead of stopping the person shooting up the boat.

YOU got this woman to act nice to you now. So, you may not want to rock the boat for yourself. Only you can decide if you want to help everyone else - the right way, not by picking up shifts as people don't show up. That actually helps to be a martyr, not a real hero. "Look what I'm doing for the dogs when no one else will. It actually takes courage to volunteer to speak up to make lasting changes. It's easier to write the email, delete it and then tell everyone, commiserate, stay a victim in the system and be a martyr. The power or lack of it is in your hands.