When to make unwilling kid ride?

[djp0630]

I haven't yet had to deal with this since my older two love every ride and force me into rides. Never rode Splash mountain until my 4 year old forced me on it. But my twins are more cautious so we arrive tomorrow and haven't figured out what I will do. I think as parents we should encourage our kids to try new things but not if they absolutely are against it. So I will encourage them to ride it but if they are against it, then have another plan. I hate being forced on rides.

 

[NorthernGrl]

I've been the one to force my kid. She's 11 and has mild autism. She'd seriously spend the entire rest of her life in her bedroom if we let her. We have 3 other kids, the youngest 2 being small for 6 and 4. We've never tried the thrill rides, and I'd never try her on them. But IASW, People Mover, and the Jungle Cruise??? Suck it up darlin' you can do this!
She fusses in line, clings to me and comes out the other end with the attitude of "I did it and didn't die!"

 

[kelmcg]

My oldest would ride all rides, my youngest would be hesitant at first but once he rode the rides he loved them. (We just had to get him on the ride!)

My boys got into pin-trading when they were young (4 & 6). Since they loved their pins....... we offered to buy them a pin for any new ride they rode. The Tower of Terror pin, Rockin' Rollercoaster pin, and others were great motivators to just ride the ride once. They are now 12 & 15 and they will ride anything......Disney, Universal Studios, Six Flags......nothing scares them!

 

[gwynne]

A key concept that I have taught my children is that fear is not real and should never be allowed to control your decision making. It is harder to teach this concept to young children, but as they get older it becomes easier - especially if the mantra is not new to them. This extends to every aspect of their lives, including rides.

I have also "forced" my boys to ride a few rides, and while it always ended well it was generally not worth the drama. I would probably choose differently now, but forcing my boys to do some of these things in their lives has produced teens who are relatively fearless compared with many of their peers.

I think there is absolutely a place in life for some fear, especially for teens and twenty-somethings. They tend to think they are invincible. I want them to stop, reflect as they make decisions in all walks of life. Some decisions have permanent serious consequences.

 

[amyjmcc90]

My 12 year-old daughter doesn't like wild thrill rides. I don't force her (or even ask her) to go on Space Mountain, EE, RnR or ToT. She didn't want to go on 7DMT this year, but I talked her into it. Yeah, she survived and liked it! Same with Test Track and BTMR. I know her limits and I wouldn't push her past them - because of sensory issues she can't do Mickey's Philharmagic, Star Wars, etc.

 

[msmama]

I don't force, but I've convinced, pleaded and yes, guilted, even bribed (maybe a little white lie tucked in too).

Since it's just my son and I, if I want to ride something, he has to come with me. The two I've "forced" were Radiator Springs Racers at Disneyland (I knew he didn't like test track so this was where the little white lie came in - and in my defense, it doesn't look like it's going as fast as it feels) and Mine Train.

He hated RSR, LOVED mine train.

I tell him that I really want to ride, I can't do it without him. I promise he will be safe, it's slower than I drive (and slower than TT and RSR) and I would really appreciate if he rode with me. He LOVES the mine train. Talks about how it's the best ride he ever rode.

Oh, on a trip when he was younger we had 2 days at AK. The first day he rode the safari he was fine, the 2nd day, he was panicked about going on. He'd somehow managed to convince himself that the rickety bridge (which I don't think is even there anymore) was way longer than the maybe 20 seconds it actually lasted. Once I convinced him that part was really short, he was able to ride again (and now believes me when I say his memory is wrong).

That said, if he's still said no after all my cajoling, we wouldn't have ridden.

 

[JenniferinFL]

Every kid is different. I was a very timid/scared child. I was still afraid of Pirates of the Caribbean as a ten year old. Unfortunately, I think that was partly from being forced to ride when terrified. Though, it may have just been me.

We were careful with our daughter, we got our annual passes again right before she turned 2. We started slow, only well lit rides, then eventually moved to the dark rides. She's 4 now and has loved Splash and Thunder since she was tall enough to ride them. We used to stand and watch people riding them for quite awhile. If your kid is scared in the queue, I don't think your going to have much success. They aren't going to get over their fear in time to realize they are having fun. My friend handled her children different, they were 6 and 8 and their first ride was Splash Mountain. They are still afraid of everything and I don't know if they'll ever ride a thrill ride.

It may help to stand by the exit for the ride and watch other children coming off the ride. My daughter has been able to help some kids inadvertently, she's just tall enough to ride but she's obviously excited to go on the ride. Often seeing a smaller child excited about a ride helps an older child realize there's nothing to be afraid of.

I don't know if any of those tricks would have helped me. As a teenager, I went to Busch Gardens with friends and finally worked my way up to rollercoasters. Still have anxiety standing in line for Space Mountain. As a kid I chickened out of that line and waited with my mom while my Dad and sister rode more than a few times.

I don't think I would ever drag a kid on a ride. I saw a parent dragging a girl onto the little mermaid ride, she was probably 8 or so, but for whatever reason was just terrified. She screamed and cried through the whole attraction.

My daughter is hesitant about the Dinosaur ride at Animal Kingdom. Sometimes we will get to the line and she will not want to ride. I do try to talk her into it just to be sure, but, if she really doesn't want to go, we just don't go. The only reason I try to talk her into it is that she cries about not going on it at the end of the day. Go figure! Our success rate for getting on Dinosaur is only about 50%.. lol

 

[ChasingLeslie]

My seven year old son alternates between being a daredevil and a scaredy cat. We went to a water park resort last week and I'll admit that I pushed him to try some of the tube slides. He absolutely hated the easy one that went down in the near-dark but liked the much taller/faster/splashier one (that I thought was much "scarier"/more thrilling).

You just never know.

That being said, we're not even going to bother to try stuff like SM, ToT, EE, etc next year unless he shows interest.

 

[nduckles]

Someone other than the parent is often the best "coaxer." I parented before the age of Youtube, and DD wasn't ready for Space Mountain during her first WDW trip. (This was also back when morning EMH were REALLY empty and REALLY wonderful.) DH and DSs went off to Space Mountain and I took DD to BTMR. It was absolutely empty, so although she was nervous there was little time to back out. When we walked right up to the ride, DD hesitated. I said, "Shall we turn back?" and the CM broke into this huge smile and said, "Oh, please ride for me, you'll have SO MUCH FUN!! You get this all to yourself!!" DD hopped aboard and we ended up riding it like 5 times in 30 minutes. I will always remember that CM.

 

[Indio]

My nephew used to be afraid of all the bigger rides. He would go through the line with us, then scoot across the car and out the exit! My sister finally started bribing him with ride pins. When he rode the ride, he got the pin. That worked like a charm. He started riding every ride and got all the pins. We know he would love them if he ever got on so bribery worked in our case!

 

[minnie mum]

I only "made" my younger DD go on a ride she was afraid of once. (Her sister has never met a ride she didn't want to try). She was 5 or 6 and it was her first time on HM.She seemed hesitant and a bit anxious in line, but I just told her "It's Disney- there's nothing that will hurt you". There was no sobbing or screaming or begging not to go. But IT. FREAKED. HER OUT. The poor kid spent the entire ride shaking, with her head buried in my lap. I felt like the worst parent on the planet.

I vowed then never to make her do a ride she didn't want to. We would describe a ride, and perhaps compare it with a similar ride she had done before. And then respect her wishes.I agree with other posters who have said that a vacation is something for everyone to enjoy, not something that must be endured as you are forced, unwillingly, to face your fears because your parent has deemed them baseless.

When she was ready, she eventually tried every ride at WDW at least once. But HM? She was 30 before she did it again. Talk about leaving a scar!

 

[Lynzer4]

If a child is outright screaming and crying I don't think they should ever be forced to ride something.

With that said I have told a small lie regarding a few rides... Example my little cousin who was 5 at the time isn't a big thrill ride kid. That's okay with us and we don't make her do anything she doesn't want but we knew she would love Splash. She agreed to ride but when she saw the drop got a little scared. She might of asked if that drop was part of the ride and We might of said you could pick to do the drop or not. Lol. She loved it and we told her after she did the BIG drop.

That same child we bribed with Mickey ears to ride Everst. It took 7 days (last day of our trip) but she agreed to ride if she could get the ears she wanted. She rode and hated it and said ever again but it was her decision and she got her ears!

Now she is slowly starting to ride thrill rides but we let her go at her pace.

 

[fitzperry]

But that's because I know my kids. If I push, they'll dig in their heels. When they're ready to do something, they will.

^^^This. If I made one of my kids ride something and she actually liked it, she wouldn't admit it and would continue to hate it on principle. But they're stubborn. I have, however, coaxed one of my daughters onto a couple of rides (ToT and RnR) when I could tell she wanted to ride but was nervous and a bit reluctant. They're two of her favorites now, of course.

 

[Disney Ron]

Absolutely NEVER!!!

 

[kiramay]

What do you do? No judging each other please! Keep just keep about your own approach!

After dealing with this on previous trips, I'm not going to worry about it anymore. No one has to ride anything they don't want to.

- 2012 I tried to get my then DS7 to ride HM. He had a huge panic attack in the stretching room and we had to chicken exit ASAP. 3 years later he still refuses to consider riding it.
- 2014 Our first FP the entire trip was ToT. I figured the preshow stuff would be scary but they'd like the drop part. Nope. It traumatized my then DS4 so much he didn't want to ride anything!!
Luckily MK was the next day so we started small (Buzz) and worked our way up the scary scale (Barnstormer, 7DMR, BTMRR, and eventually Space Mntn!). These 2 still won't ride HM though.

Our upcoming trip I'm not forcing anyone to ride anything. They can do teacups with DH and I'll use their FP, lol. (Kind of kidding...).

 

[Disneybuckeye]

I think you need to know your kids and not judge other parents. We pretty much drug DS7 on TOT and RNRC. He kept saying no and we said get on. He had done much scarier rides at Kings Island here at home and knew he would love them. We ended up riding each about 7-8 times that day.

A few years later I said something to him about it. He said I really wasn't scared of the ride. I just did it to make it more scary for me. I said you made us look like mean parents. He said why do you care what other people think?

 

[gwynne]

After dealing with this on previous trips, I'm not going to worry about it anymore. No one has to ride anything they don't want to.

- 2012 I tried to get my then DS7 to ride HM. He had a huge panic attack in the stretching room and we had to chicken exit ASAP. 3 years later he still refuses to consider riding it.
- 2014 Our first FP the entire trip was ToT. I figured the preshow stuff would be scary but they'd like the drop part. Nope. It traumatized my then DS4 so much he didn't want to ride anything!!
Luckily MK was the next day so we started small (Buzz) and worked our way up the scary scale (Barnstormer, 7DMR, BTMRR, and eventually Space Mntn!). These 2 still won't ride HM though.

Our upcoming trip I'm not forcing anyone to ride anything. They can do teacups with DH and I'll use their FP, lol. (Kind of kidding...).

What we did was tell them let us know what you want to ride. It would have been fine if they said nothing. They chose, and they gradually started to ride happily because they were doing for their own fun, not because we insisted.

I knew what happened with me as a child didn't work. It was awful being forced, and I have bad memories of the experiences. I wasn't about to do the same to my kids. Ugh.

 

[sam1998]

We talked my son (5 at the time) in to riding Tower or Terror. It's been 10 months and he is still having nightmares. Not of the ride itself, but the Twilight Zone theming and effects before the ride.

 

[itchin2go]

I feel like I've seen reports on here of CMs stepping in when parents were trying to force their kids on things. Just FYI.

And I can understand if you just *know* that your kid will love something if they give it a chance. I can understand trying to talk them into riding in that case, trying to get them comfortable and make them feel secure enough to go for it, but I just can't understand forcing them to do any ride they don't want to do.

The other thing I don't understand is trying to get them to ride rides that they REALLY don't want to ride because it's something YOU want to do.

 

[2manypets]

Curious how others handle kids who are scared to ride. I made my scaredy-cat daughter (probably age 6 at the time) go on Thunder Mountain a couple times - no loud crying, just a pouty face and a little pitiful whimpering. I truly thought (and still think) that she would like it if she just tried. Then when she was almost 8 I tried to get her to ride it again, but she burst into tears, so I didn't make her. But I've already told her that she's trying 7DMT next time, despite her protests (she'll be almost 9), so she has 6 months to get used to the idea .

What do you do? No judging each other please! Keep just keep about your own approach!

Could it be that your DD has been permanently traumatized. It's not okay to force a child that's not willing to ride. A child will get there eventually, but doesn't need a kick in the A** to get there