WWYD?

[dyna]

Almost 12 yr old boy soiling himself. No he has no known medical issue that would cause this. He does not care that he stinks at home or at school an YES he does soil himself at school.

 

[DeniseJH]

I believe a Psychiatrist appt. is in order.

 

[brockash]

Almost 12 yr old boy soiling himself. No he has no known medical issue that would cause this. He does not care that he stinks at home or at school an YES he does soil himself at school.

Without any other background and assuming he is not delayed mentally in any way and there's no known factors; I'd say I'd be seeking counseling/therapy. Definitely not normal. - Has he always been like this or this new? If new when did the change happen; what factors could have been involved; what does he say when it happens etc.?

 

[ronandannette]

Almost 12 yr old boy soiling himself. No he has no known medical issue that would cause this. He does not care that he stinks at home or at school an YES he does soil himself at school.

This is profoundly abnormal. I agree with the PP - get the boy some psychiatric attention immediately.

ETA: Not sure how the school is responding but I would hope he is being sent home immediately upon an incident like this. It's so unsanitary and untenable for fellow students to be subject to.

 

[penn19]

Does he have encopresis? Or is he full on soiling himself?

 

[anniemae]

I would start with pediatrician to get their opinion. They will steer you in the right direction. they could order some medical testing to rule out things. Then probably psychiatrist. Has something happened emotionally in his life?

 

[EscalatorKid]

Agreeing with others-- first step, pediatrician/family doctor for examination and then a referral to child psychologist. That is abnormal behavior for a 11-12 year old.

There were issues with a 6th grade student in the school I worked at that one of the Aides was assigned to take him to the bathroom every class period or so to ensure that he was able to go in order to prevent him from soiling himself. (I never got the full details, but I would often chat with the aide outside the restroom next to the classroom I was assigned to.)

The school guidance counselor, nurse, and administration should be able to set something up that is similar if needed. If a kid soiled himself at school now, they would absolutely be calling home for a change of clothes and cleanup, especially in the secondary level. Beyond that, if it were a repetitive thing, they would have it documented and would push the issue to seek help for the child.

 

[cabanafrau]

Particularly if this is a new behavior it should be brought to the attention of a professional immediately, as it can be quite significant.

 

[4kids4karen]

I believe a Psychiatrist appt. is in order.

I agree. This can be a sign of much deeper issues.

 

[ronandannette]

Agreeing with others-- first step, pediatrician/family doctor for examination and then a referral to child psychologist. That is abnormal behavior for a 11-12 year old.

There were issues with a 6th grade student in the school I worked at that one of the Aides was assigned to take him to the bathroom every class period or so to ensure that he was able to go in order to prevent him from soiling himself. (I never got the full details, but I would often chat with the aide outside the restroom next to the classroom I was assigned to.)

The school guidance counselor, nurse, and administration should be able to set something up that is similar if needed. If a kid soiled himself at school now, they would absolutely be calling home for a change of clothes and cleanup, especially in the secondary level. Beyond that, if it were a repetitive thing, they would have it documented and would push the issue to seek help for the child.

I have to presume the child you’re mentioning was not neuro-typical or that there was some specific medical condition resulting in these symptoms. Of course it’s not normal. And thinking more about it, the entire premise of the OP - what would you do - is a bit absurd. Isn’t it obvious the child needs medical/mental health intervention, pronto?

 

[EscalatorKid]

I have to presume the child you’re mentioning was not neuro-typical or that there was some specific medical condition resulting in these symptoms. Of course it’s not normal. And thinking more about it, the entire premise of the OP - what would you do - is a bit absurd. Isn’t it obvious the child needs medical/mental health intervention, pronto?

I'm reiterating what OP said. Of course it's abnormal. I put an anecdote from personal experience and the school's response to that child's health issues and suggested a trip to a physician for referral to a child mental health professional.

I'm thinking that OP is maybe looking for experiences from others who have had similar issues with children before. I would also imagine that they're setting up some kind of medical/mental health intervention to correct the issue because they know it's not normal.

I think that maybe OP is looking for some info that will help them through the process that can be daunting when you're inexperienced with these types of issues.

 

[ronandannette]

I'm reiterating what OP said. Of course it's abnormal. I put an anecdote from personal experience and the school's response to that child's health issues and suggested a trip to a physician for referral to a child mental health professional.

I'm thinking that OP is maybe looking for experiences from others who have had similar issues with children before. I would also imagine that they're setting up some kind of medical/mental health intervention to correct the issue because they know it's not normal.

I think that maybe OP is looking for some info that will help them through the process that can be daunting when you're inexperienced with these types of issues.

Maybe the question, without further context, seems a little odd. I mean really - what is there to do, other than get professional help immediately. And if it were my kid I’d be pushing the panic button.

 

[Floridaman999]

After eliminating any possible physical issues that may be causing this, I'd recommend getting him some mental health treatment because this is clearly abnormal and there is most certainly something wrong due to this behavior. I really don't know what else productive you could do besides this.

 

[anniemae]

Any update OP?

 

[dyna]

The boy is in counseling has been for yrs. I can't say he has ever been fully potty trained he's never been much for wiping himself says it is nasty to do...(what can be nastier than not wiping?)

Same counselor all these yrs not much has changed, mom says This counselor is only 1 in town they do live in a small town and to go else where would take up at least a half day if not more.

Only thing I know of that has changed the last few months is dad got a better job making more money but is away from home more.

 

[jaybirdsmommy]

Does he have encopresis? Or is he full on soiling himself?

My oldest had this. The child should definitely be seen by a pediatrician if he hasn't already. Ours said it was so common that in a class of 30 students, there were probably 2 that had it. It's fairly easy to treat. Is he on the spectrum by any chance?

I know it's frustrating, and very very embarrassing, especially when he seems not to care about the smell, mess, etc. In DS case, it was causing him to wet the bed at night as well, so doubly nasty.

For DS, it was a matter of getting more fiber in his diet and daily doses of laxative. It seems to be tied to constipation/holding issues, he finally outgrew it around 7th grade.

 

[dyna]

I recommended the boys mother check into the encopresis. Other than that there really isn't much else I can do. The question is will his mother follow up with the doctors advice.

I know there has been times when 1 of the kids was taken to doctor to get medicine an kid didn't want to take med so did not have to.

Shut up Dyna this family has more issues than you can count.

 

[cabanafrau]

Do you have any insight as to whether the school has serious concerns -- beyond the obvious, immediate concern? I'd be surprised if the school doesn't have their counselor attempting to work with this child/family -- and if they might not get enough evidence to report to children's services.

If you have enough information relating to serious neglect with these children, you could report it to children's services. In our state it is not legal to reveal the source of the report, which may be the case in many other states as well. At a certain level things like not giving your children doctor prescribed meds is legally deemed medical neglect.

This sounds like a family in crisis and official intervention is sometimes the best thing that can happen for children. It's very hard for people who don't actually know the family to be able to tell if this is true for this family, but I beg you to take a long, careful look at what you know of the reality of the situation and take action if you reasonably feel it is necessary.

 

[dyna]

This family has been reported time after time NOTHING has ever been done. WAiT the parents was made to go to parenting classes they did attend they just did not learn anything or carry thru with what they learned at home. They have went to the classes 4 or 5 times.

 

[OrangeBirdGirl]

This is a sad instance, sorry for what your friend is going through. Maybe he needs to see a different counselor, possibly travel to a neighboring town if that truly is the only one in town.

When it happens at school does he feel embarrassed? I would think at 12 other kids would be picking on him. If he doesn't feel any embarrassment as to what is happening, I wonder if there is something non-physcologially wrong.... Possibly a tumor (not always cancerous!) pressing onto an area in his brain that is having the action trigger the reactions of a much younger child, thus feelings that I think a 12 year old would have towards that. OK, I think I watch too many medical dramas!