I'll pray for you......

[dish rag]

I never wanted a prayer and don't need one People like this say I'll pray for you to make themselves feel better about them selves.

I have on occasion offered a prayer to someone in a difficult situation and it was never to make me feel better about myself. So I'm not sure why you think that.

 

[kirstenb1]

She was out of line. If someone is a close friend or family member, I do say I'll pray for them. If it is more of an acquaintance going through a bad time, I ask them if it's okay if I pray for them.

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

I know this is private school but I thought there was separation of church and state

 

[disykat]

I have on occasion offered a prayer to someone in a difficult situation and it was never to make me feel better about myself. So I'm not sure why you think that.

OP clearly thinks that because in this case the "I'll pray for you" was clearly a put down, not a sincere offer of help in a difficult situation. I'm big on assuming best intentions, but see no way that this could have been interpreted as an honest intention to pray for them. Insulting someone using words that can also be used with good intent is still an insult. She was offering judgement.

The words "I'll pray for you" don't belong in a put down. They are meant to be encouragement. While the OP may not be one to generally appreciate prayers, I'm sure he can still discern the difference and appreciate those who are trying to be encouraging.

The person in the OP basically said "You don't care about your child and have abandoned your wife, I'll pray for you." That is not best intentions.

 

[Allison]

Say thank you and move on. Why do anything else, unless you want to be rude or start something? People who say it are trying to be nice. No need to meet that with rudeness.

You have it backwards. The employee was being rude and starting something. Nice? Not at all.

 

[MrsDuck]

I think this woman is out of line. Not about the praying comment but for harassing parents.

I wouldn't be overly thrilled with the "I'll pray for you" but I'd smile and move on. The lecture and the questioning about why I'm angry with God would have a phone call to the pre-school director.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Fellow DIS posters... This should not be any kind of religious discussion. Which is off limits here.
This is about how a school staff member was rude and demeaning and nosey, and crossed every line.
MrsDuck, above, just nailed it.

I wish everyone would leave their own religious thoughts (would they, or would they not, pray. Etc...) out of it.

Tink, any private school, other than a regular government (County/State) school district is not "the government" aka: State.
So the idea of separation of Church and State does not apply... Just like religious schools operated by religious organizations, such as Catholic, Baptist, etc...)

Anyhow.... The thing here is that if this is actually a Montessori School, I would imagine that the Montessori Organization would have policies against promoting any obviously religious ideologies or viewpoints/agendas.

OP: Just to throw this out there.... If this is Montessori poilicy, and this situation were to become a real problem with several parents, and the option begins to be pulling the kids out of that school... Then perhaps an effort to contact the upper levels of Montessori would be a possibility.

 

[IceSkatingPrincess]

I just say thank you. Generally, what they are saying is with the best intentions, but hey, even if it isn't, kill em' with kindness.

 

[Skywalker]

Ugh, adults "reporting" each other because you were offended. Seriously, you don't like this woman. She said something that rubbed you the wrong way. Oh Noes! Get her fired! Just shrug it off and move on. If she actually becomes a problem with your child's education in some way I would report it, but just because she doesn't think or act like you think she should? I've got bigger issues to deal with.

 

[bcla]

Fellow DIS posters... This should not be any kind of religious discussion. Which is off limits here.
This is about how a school staff member was rude and demeaning and nosey, and crossed every line.
MrsDuck, above, just nailed it.

I wish everyone would leave their own religious thoughts (would they, or would they not, pray. Etc...) out of it.

Tink, any private school, other than a regular government (County/State) school district is not "the government" aka: State.
So the idea of separation of Church and State does not apply... Just like religious schools operated by religious organizations, such as Catholic, Baptist, etc...)

Anyhow.... The thing here is that if this is actually a Montessori School, I would imagine that the Montessori Organization would have policies against promoting any obviously religious ideologies or viewpoints/agendas.

OP: Just to throw this out there.... If this is Montessori poilicy, and this situation were to become a real problem with several parents, and the option begins to be pulling the kids out of that school... Then perhaps an effort to contact the upper levels of Montessori would be a possibility.

The Montessori model is actually to incorporate religious lessons without any kind of ceremony that makes it seem like a religious lesson. I've attended a wedding at a local Jewish temple, and there is a Montessori preschool on site.

 

[ols386]

I generally say thank you, but this lady overstepped her boundaries. Her comments were totally inappropriate. I would probably mention the conversation to a school admin.

 

[AnnaFloridaLover]

The Montessori model is actually to incorporate religious lessons without any kind of ceremony that makes it seem like a religious lesson. I've attended a wedding at a local Jewish temple, and there is a Montessori preschool on site.

Montessori schools are absolutely not based on any type of religion. All of my kids started off in different Montessori schools.

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

@Wishing on a star I am sorry I am just aware of the rules of public school rules I did not mean to offend you or anyone else with my question

 

[bcla]

Montessori schools are absolutely not based on any type of religion. All of my kids started off in different Montessori schools.

Didn't Maria Montessori believe that religious principles be somehow incorporated into teaching? It wasn't necessarily a specific religion from what I've been told.

 

[Julie's Haircut]

I'd say something rude in return and let one rip in the witch's face. I have special talents.

______________________________________________________________________________________

For those you say you'll pray for someone. Do you pray for the person by name, or lump them in with everyone else you think needs prayers?

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

Like I pretty much said in my apology it has been a decade sens I learned about the different preschools but I don't remember Montessori being a religious option I well be the first to admit it if I am wrong

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

I'd say something rude in return and let one rip in the witch's face. I have special talents.

______________________________________________________________________________________

For those you say you'll pray for someone. Do you pray for the person by name, or lump them in with everyone else you think needs prayers?

Pray by name

 

[luvsJack]

Well first off, it doesn't matter if the school was private or public. She wasn't leading a prayer, she didn't say "let us pray". She isn't teaching prayer. She didn't say it over a loudspeaker. She didn't do anything wrong in that aspect.

BUT she apparently said it with a snarky tone,maybe? Which is a very odd way to say I will pray for you. But maybe it's just her way. Maybe she meant she would pray for your safety in your travels. Maybe she just comes across as rude, some people do.

Seems the best thing to do is avoid conversations with this person and move on.

 

[dish rag]

I'd say something rude in return and let one rip in the witch's face. I have special talents.

______________________________________________________________________________________

For those you say you'll pray for someone. Do you pray for the person by name, or lump them in with everyone else you think needs prayers?

For me, the name.

 

[bdcp]

I think some people are looking to be offended. How do you react when you sneeze and someone says "bless you"? Others need to learn what separation of church and state really mean.