Ever Been Kind of Insulted By a Christmas Gift?

[Princess Mulan]

I did once get a inappropriate gift from a male co-worker - he bought me a nightshirt for Christmas, and it was not something that you give a co-worker... more like your wife... and when I opened it everyone stopped talking... I sat there shocked... he was like oh no... that's for my wife, I mixed the packages...he was so embarrassed... I started laughing, he kept apologizing... I was like no problem... he was the HR person... so it really was funny... so I handed it back to him, and said she will love it...he turned like 50 shades of red... he did bring my gift later on which was a couple of pairs of fun socks, and gift card to Macy's... I will say that the nightshirt must have worked as they had a baby about 9 months later... LOL

This reminds me of a story that a friend tells about the Christmas she opened a gift from her in-laws. It was an exquisite sweater that she instantly loved. Her MIL snatched it out of her hands and said the gifts had gotten mixed up. The sweater was meant for someone else.

She then gave my friend another box and said, “This one is yours. I thought of you as soon as I saw these in the store.” It was a pair of the most hideous socks my friend had ever seen!

And yes, that was the only gift she got from her in-laws that year!

 

[prairie_girl]

Sorry - I’m confused. Who gave who the toilet paper and why was it an issue for Grandpa?

I think "Scott" gave a bunch of tp to his grandparents and thought it was funny because it was Scott brand.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

This reminds me of a story that a friend tells about the Christmas she opened a gift from her in-laws. It was an exquisite sweater that she instantly loved. Her MIL snatched it out of her hands and said the gifts had gotten mixed up. The sweater was meant for someone else.

She then gave my friend another box and said, “This one is yours. I thought of you as soon as I saw these in the store.” It was a pair of the most hideous socks my friend had ever seen!

And yes, that was the only gift she got from her in-laws that year!

We've had gift mixups before at my in-laws...honestly they are terrible about reusing bags. We love to reuse bags but you have to make sure you cover up or remove if possible the gift tag from before. More than once the old gift tag was the one seen and the gift put in the area for the wrong person. At least in my case it's been pretty clear the gift wasn't for me but rather for my husband or for my step-father-in-law..though I wouldn't mind clamps (those things do come in handy) I wouldn't have asked for them, it would have been something my husband had put on his list.

I feel bad for your friend though instantly liking the gift only to have it not at all be for her

 

[ford91exploder]

Sorry - I’m confused. Who gave who the toilet paper and why was it an issue for Grandpa?

Grandpa gave the toilet paper, he thought my friend was laughing at the gift of Scott TP to Scott

where In reality Scott was rolling on the floor laughing about ‘personalized’ TP

once Grandpa realized that they had given Scott TP to Scott he realized why scott was laughing! At that point everyone realized what a hilarious moment it was

 

[ronandannette]

While I wouldn't have had a fit and would have been gracious, I wouldn't have found that an appropriate gift, to be honest. If the giver wanted to donate to a cause, they should have done so in their own name. Those sort of things (unless you know that the recipient would appreciate it) smack of using someone else's money to make yourself look/feel good. Yes, I know that it was the giver's money (unless your office gives people money for secret Santa), but it was "earmarked" gift money for the recipient.

All valid reasons why Secret Santa is stupid. In later years it got so ridiculous trying to ensure everybody got something decent and didn't whine about it for weeks afterwards. Rules were put in place. No candy or wine allowed; those are mail-it-in gifts that don't reflect an appropriate amount of thought or effort. Then it evolved to where everybody who was participating had to write a "letter to Santa" listing things they wanted or would find acceptable. Finally now it's at the point that it must be a $25 gift card (from one of 8 "approved" places). Honestly, it's a joke and a waste of time. All office festivities were suspended this year due to Covid and hopefully this one doesn't get resurrected.

ETA: The original recipient (not the giver and not me, who ultimately ended up with it) of the donation gift did get a Tax Receipt for a deduction, so there was that.

 

[ford91exploder]

I think "Scott" gave a bunch of tp to his grandparents and thought it was funny because it was Scott brand.

you have general idea Grandparents gave Scott - Scott TP and paper towels and napkins, As scott and his wife had just gotten married.

Scotts grandpa was a sales manager for a paper distributor hence the LARGE quantity of ‘personalized’ paper products

 

[wishiwasindisneyjen]

Not a "gift" really but quite a few years ago a co-worker asked if I would be interested in some clothes that no longer fit her. I am plus sized, at the time wore at 14/16, she was significantly larger than me, I assumed she outgrew them.

She brings me two garbage bags of clothes, all size 26. There was no way any of those clothes fit (I did try a few on) so I'm not sure why she gave them to me. I donated them.

 

[ronandannette]

you have general idea Grandparents gave Scott - Scott TP and paper towels and napkins, As scott and his wife had just gotten married.

Scotts grandpa was a sales manager for a paper distributor hence the LARGE quantity of ‘personalized’ paper products

And he was offended that the grandson (named Scott) laughed? If somebody gave me toilet paper that they got for free at work, as a Christmas present, I would definitely laugh too, assuming it was intended to be a gag gift.

 

[Nora03]

Years ago I worked in an office of mostly women, but the boss was a man. Our gift exchange was limited to $10 or $15 and we’d put our likes and dislikes on the paper with our names. Example- nothing that needs to fit. One year the boss gave a gag gift of a styrofoam brick! The women would give gifts with thoughts of what people would like. Who wants a styrofoam brick? That would go straight into the the trash. It was pretty uncomfortable.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

All valid reasons why Secret Santa is stupid. In later years it got so ridiculous trying to ensure everybody got something decent and didn't whine about it for weeks afterwards. Rules were put in place. No candy or wine allowed; those are mail-it-in gifts that don't reflect an appropriate amount of thought or effort. Then it evolved to where everybody who was participating had to write a "letter to Santa" listing things they wanted or would find acceptable. Finally now it's at the point that it must be a $25 gift card (from one of 8 "approved" places). Honestly, it's a joke and a waste of time. All office festivities were suspended this year due to Covid and hopefully this one doesn't get resurrected.

ETA: The original recipient (not the giver and not me, who ultimately ended up with it) of the donation gift did get a Tax Receipt for a deduction, so there was that.

The whole gift card only rule is dumb IMO. If we’re all just exchanging gift cards why bother? That’s why I opt out of all Pollyanna and secret Santa type thing. There’s no thought put in and no one wants to add another person to the list to get a gift for, especially a thoughtful gift. They’re usually gift card exchanges. If I’m giving you a gift card to just get one back why don’t we save the trouble and just buy ourselves something we want.

 

[TipsyTraveler]

The whole gift card only rule is dumb IMO. If we’re all just exchanging gift cards why bother? That’s why I opt out of all Pollyanna and secret Santa type thing. There’s no thought put in and no one wants to add another person to the list to get a gift for, especially a thoughtful gift. They’re usually gift card exchanges. If I’m giving you a gift card to just get one back why don’t we save the trouble and just buy ourselves something we want.

Agreed, but that’s kind of my mentality about gifts in general. If you’re buying me those books I want and I’m buying you that kitchen gadget you want, why don’t we save ourselves the trouble and just buy our own things when we want or need them? And if we’re not buying things we know the other wants, well, now the problem is we’re buying things the other person doesn’t want.

Man, I really hate gift giving. I avoid it as much as possible. Lol. (Except for my kids. They’re fun.)

 

[prairie_girl]

you have general idea Grandparents gave Scott - Scott TP and paper towels and napkins, As scott and his wife had just gotten married.

Scotts grandpa was a sales manager for a paper distributor hence the LARGE quantity of ‘personalized’ paper products

oops, I had the giver and the receiver reversed. If I got a bunch of paper towels and toilet paper for Christmas I'd be thrilled. That stuff's expensive lol

 

[piccolopat]

No, but more so what wasn't given.

Every year, we join my brother's family for Christmas. His kids are all grown with kids of their own, but mine are 20 years younger. Every year, we purchase gifts for the children in the family. Every child gets a present from us, every year for over 18+ years. However, one of his 4 kid's (my kids cousins) seems to always exclude my children from his gift-giving. It's not that they don't give presents or didn't have enough money, it's just that he seems to specifically exclude my children. Never mind that we always purchase his children presents. I've thought about excluding their family one year to make a statement, but could never bring myself to be so hurtful.

I would contact this cousin far before the next holiday and simply let them know that you won't be exchanging gifts with them since they apparently have no interest in doing so. It's not being hurtful if you are upfront about what you are doing and why.

 

[piccolopat]

I feel guilty that she is putting in time, money and effort on the gifts. It’s not “transactional” but I would like to show my love for her family, too. If you’re familiar with the 5 Love Languages, hers is clearly gifts and I know when I was reciprocating she appreciated it. But it feels so excessive to me and I get very stressed out trying to manage it all... The insulted feeling comes from feeling like 7 gifts a year is way over the top and I would much prefer to show my love in ways other than gifts. But it seems like she isn’t open to that and I guess I perceive it as my efforts to do other things aren’t good enough.

Why not talk to her and suggest that instead of exchanging gifts all year long that you do something fun with everyone like going to an event or a day at the zoo. Let her know that you appreciate her thoughtfulness but also that you are sorry that you cannot reciprocate in kind.

 

[MillauFr]

Last year I got a 10 dollar bill in a plain envelope from someone. I like money, I really do. But everyone else around me got a gift, which I would have rather had. I didn't feel insulted, I was more hurt.

A true insult to a Philly resident would be getting a gift certificate to one of those tourist trap cheesesteak places like Geno's or Pat's.

 

[BlueStarryHat]

A true insult to a Philly resident would be getting a gift certificate to one of those tourist trap cheesesteak places like Geno's or Pat's.

Ewwww, yes. Visitors to Philly- don't go to either of these places! They both suck.

 

[Donald13]

I thought of another story. It's not something that happened to me, but it's something my grandma did. I didn't hear the story until after she passed. I don't know when it happened, probably before I was born.

My grandma was friends with a family. One day my grandma decided that this family needed a new set of dishes. Grandma went out and bought a brand new set of dishes. She took the dishes over to the family's house. Grandma went into their kitchen, took their old dishes out of the cupboard, threw the old dishes in the trash and put the new dishes in the cupboard. After grandma left, the family took their old dishes out of the trash and put them back in the cupboard. (Hopefully after washing them.)

ok that’s just bizarre. I have many questions. Did they ask her to do this? How did she get in the house? And just why???

 

[cheryl.UK]

Once my Mil gave me a bag of hotel style miniature toiletries. They were all different types. The thing is, she never stays in hotels so heaven knows where she got them from. So, free stuff, stolen from hotels that someone else said at. Nice!

 

[mom2rtk]

oops, I had the giver and the receiver reversed. If I got a bunch of paper towels and toilet paper for Christmas I'd be thrilled. That stuff's expensive lol

Especially this year!

 

[design_mom]

Once my Mil gave me a bag of hotel style miniature toiletries. They were all different types. The thing is, she never stays in hotels so heaven knows where she got them from. So, free stuff, stolen from hotels that someone else said at. Nice!

When my husband and I were first married. His grandmother gave me some hotel towels (like, had the hotel name on them in a theft-deterrent kind of way). I opened the box and was kind of embarrassed, so when the rest of the family asked what was in it, I just said "Some nice towels. Thank you, Grandma." without taking them out of the box. Grandma said "Which hotel did I give you. I've forgotten! Oh yes. Arthur said that was a nice one!" Apparently, Grandpa used to travel for work and would bring home the towels (she'd also never stayed in the hotel.)

I wasn't offended by that one because I am 100% sure she didn't mean to offend (she was the *sweetest* lady and she liked me), but it was definitely an unusual gift.