Grandparents and bath time ...

[Pugsly]

We decided to have the kids over for dinner last night on a whim (DH and I were busy all day, so there was no 'traditional' Mother's Day get together per se). Dinner coincided with our 1 1/2 year old granddaughter's bedtime, so they brought her PJs and planned to bathe her at our house before bedtime.

My step-daughter asked me if I would like to bathe my granddaughter since her husband thought this would be something his mom would enjoy. I said I'd be happy to watch the first time out and help since it had been so long since I'd bathed a toddler and I didn't know what her bath time ritual looked like (are we washing her hair? Does she freak out over having water poured over her head? What have they found that works best for baby?)

Turns out, she bathes with the baby and was asking if I'd like to do that (not just sit outside the tub and bathe her).

Is this something new in parenting - bathing with your child?

Would you, as a grandparent, bathe with your grandchild?

Me personally, I am not comfortable doing that. I would relish bath-time with her if it involved me outside the tub and her in. Just curious if I'm just out of touch here.

 

[DopeyDame]

That's funny because it was the exact opposite in our family! I never bathed with my kids when they were toddlers. But my mom was so surprised that I didn't bathe with them - she swears she did with my and my sisters when we were little and that's what all her now-grandmother friends did too.
Obviously I think either way is fine - I think this is a classic case of whatever works for the parents and the babies!

 

[ChattaAlley]

I think that is super odd. Maybe not to bathe with your own child in your own home but if you are at someone else's house and someone else was bathing your child that would be very awkward in my opinion.

 

[KarenAylwood]

We have never bathed with our son (almost 3). My parents did bathe with me when I was younger but more when I was a baby in the awkward "what if she falls over and knocks her head open on the tub or faucet?" kind of stage. It's all in personal parenting preference. I do think it's kind of odd to ask someone else to bathe with your child that hasn't done it from birth though. I haven't ever heard of it but it's not to say it's not done (obviously lol).

 

[Christine]

I never bathed with my children. I have heard of some who did though. I would never even dream of asking others to do it that way for my child if I was leaving them in their care.

 

[wishesuponastar]

I've never heard of adults bathing with their child. Not something I would do.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I sometimes bathed with my children when they were little and I bathed with my niece when she was a toddler.

I do think it's a little bit strange that she'd assume you'd want to do this. And, I suppose I'd bathe with a grandchild, if there were time constraints or something. Probably wouldn't just to do it, though, not that I think there's anything wrong with it.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

It's weird that she would ask the way you said she did.

I mean... Asking you to help would one thing or to even give the child a bath if she wanted to relax(my MIL have that kind of relationship where I can flat out ask her to do something). But asking if you want to bathe WITH THE kid is strange.

 

[MaryLovesPoohBear]

We showered with our son. At the time he hated a bath. But enjoyed the shower. I would never ask someone else to do the same thing.

 

[amy1115]

I have heard of parents doing that, but to ask someone else to do it seems odd.

 

[mnrose]

When my kids were tiny babies (think unable to sit by themselves...before they were 1), I'd bathe with them because it was easier. Dh stood outside the tub, and would hand me the kids one by one. I'd wash, hand the kid back, and then get the second one. (Twins). We did anything we could to save time and effort. LOL.

But, once they could sit alone, we'd bathe them together in the tub (us on the outside, them on the inside).

 

[kamik86]

I think bathing with your kid is fine... I also bathed with my older sisters a few times and they were quite a bit older then me. Most of the time it was faster that way. But I agree it would be odd to ask someone else to do that, would also be odd to assume to do that at someone elses house.

 

[Wishing on a star]

I won't give any opinion on what each parent might do at home...
But, yes, count me in, very much, with the 'seems very ODD' crowd.

So, to answer, No, I would not bathe with my grandchild.

I also think it is odd that they feel the need to follow an extended bath-time ritual, to the minute, in a situation like this.
At somebody else's home, when not entirely necessary because of traveling and staying overnight.

 

[anniemae]

I have never done that, but have heard of people who have. I think it's strange she expected you to strip down and take a bath with your grandchild though! I, like you, would have gladly assisted if everyone except the toddler kept their clothes on. There are all sorts of parenting styles and never a one-size-fits-all, but that just seems really strange to me to expect you to do that.

 

[smiths02]

I have bathed with all of my children while they are under 4...just easier sometimes. It wasn't how we usually did it, just sometimes. I think it's weird to ask anyone else to do it that way, though.

 

[smiths02]

I won't give any opinion on what each parent might do at home...
But, yes, count me in, very much, with the 'seems very ODD' crowd.

So, to answer, No, I would not bathe with my grandchild.

I also think it is odd that they feel the need to follow an extended bath-time ritual, to the minute, in a situation like this.
At somebody else's home, when not entirely necessary because of traveling and staying overnight.

A 1 1/2 year old really does not need to bathe every day. It might actually be better for skin and hair to skip a bath sometimes.

 

[lorimay]

As a grandmother of two, I have never and would never bathe with them.

I do sit with my granddaughter at bath time when she is over, she likes me to stay with her while she plays in the tub, she just turned 6.
Now my 7 yr old grandson whats his privacy.

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

We've never bathed with our kids and I cannot think of ANY occasion in which I would ask someone to bathe with them. IF for some reason we could not skip bath time on a holiday, then I would change up our routine and ask if grandma wanted to give her a quick bath with no expectations of the adult being in the tub. It all seems so bizarre.

 

[Pugsly]

OP here - I totally get doing this (as a parent) when the baby isn't old enough to sit on their own. I understand too, mnrose's situation (time constraints, twins). I remember bathing with my sister when we were little and DH says he and the kids' mom used to bathe both kids together.

I too found it odd that she asked if I would want to. I'm all in for watching her play in the tub, helping her clean herself (or clean her period). But I don't want to play in the tub with her. We have a pool for that kind of thing.

 

[nugov2]

Gross...as both a parent and grandparent. Not because of nudity (though not sure grandparent nudity is something either side would want their grandchildren seeing nor would I), but strictly sanitary reasons. There was a thread before about bathing children together and that skeeves me out. To me bath water is for one person only and to relax in more than clean other than for very small babies/toddlers. YMMV