I need help coping with my miscarriage- last update 5/21

[LittleBlue22]

~*~ see new post ~*~

As joyful as I was to announce I was expecting a 5th, I am sad to say that our little one is in heaven today.

I went to my first OB appt. yesterday, they did a 3D ultrasound and that's when I found out. The baby was about 10 weeks old, looked perfectly normal, exept the heart was not beating. I've never miscarried before so this is all new to me. This was our last child to be so it makes me feel especially sad. It was an unexpected pregnancy and an equally unexpected outcome.

If you've miscarried before, what helped you get through it? Do you post on a miscarriage blog, if so which one? Do you know of any poems regarding loss?

Thank you all.

Update 5/19: I go for my pre op appt. tomorrow mid morning. I'm starting to get knots in my stomache. My dh will be going with me for support and he'll be able to retain the information better than I. The nurse mentioned drawing blood and I'd be given information for the procedure scheduled for Wed. (5/21). My heart is beating faster as I type. What should I expect during the pre op visit? I hate surprises. I feel like I'm starting another phase of an emotional roller coaster.

 

[DMickey28]

Blue - I am so sorry.

 

[mla973]

LittleBlue22 - No advice, but just a lot of hugs to you. DH and I don't have a family yet, so I can't really offer any advice on how to deal. My guess is that time heals all. I'm so sorry that you have to deal with the sadness of losing a child.

 

[bcvgal]

I just wanted to say I'm so sorry.

 

[DAISY DUCK FAN!]

I'm so sorry.

 

[Minniemom97]

LittleBlue22 ~

So sorry for your loss. I had 3 miscarriages (1 being an ectopic pregnancy). I have a husband who understood and was right there with me the whole time. I think everyone's grieving process is different.

I now have 2 great kids (a 10 year old and a 2 1/2 year old), the second of which is a complete surprise since I was told I probably wouldn't/couldn't have any more children.

Not trying to get religious or anything, but I really believe my other 3 children are waiting on me in heaven. Okay, I'm gonna stop now because I'm getting teary-eyed.

God Bless.

 

[shirleyb]

It is really hard, and I know how you must be feeling today. I miscarried my first, and it honestly took me months to get past it. It's hard, because the rest of the world moves on, but you don't. It took me finding something else to focus on, to start to move past it.

Best wishes to you.

 

[mdrob214]

I can;t offer any word sor help but here's a hug for you.

 

[Angelhalo]

My BFF miscarried like 4 or 5 times I believe. I am going to ask her what she did to help move past it. I'm so sorry

 

[FormrCastMbr]

Hi! I am so sorry that you are going through this. I have had 2 miscarriages in the past 5 months...it's not easy but you have to be strong for your other children but don't be afraid to let out your sorrow.

What has gotten me through is knowing that a miscarriage means the pregnancy and the child were not healthy.

 

[cinderellakh20]

Just wanted to say our prayers are with you and your family

 

[pha1226]

Nothing I can say can help you...just wanted to send hugs .

 

[lindakmonty]

I just wanted to give you a hug and say I'm sorry for what you're going through. I've miscarried several times myself. It is SO hard! I blamed myself, what did I do wrong? My Dr. was always there to help me through. I didn't do anything wrong, God just had a different plan. I am w/Shirley, I had to focus on other things. I took up new hobbies. I love to take pictures, I would get all my scrapbook stuff out and just go to town. That really took my mind off things. Good luck and we're all here for you

 

[luvindisneyworld]

I have miscarried twice and then I carried Tiffany till I was right at 6 months. It is the hardest thing in the world to have to go through. I was so happy when I was pregnant with Tiffany after I made it past the 12 week point where I had lost my 2nd and I just knew things were going to be ok but there was other plans for her.
Over time it does get easier and my DH was my rock I swear i dont know what I would have done without him. Just take it one day at a time and dont try to be strong just feel the way you want and need to feel everyone will understand. You will have good days and bad days and it has been 9 years since I lost her and I still have bad days. Your DH will be a good comfort for you because whether they show it or not they are hurting to they also lost a baby.DH and I cried together for days and days it brought us alot closer and I will never ever forget how we helped each other through that time.

I know when I lost Tiffany I had a Dcousin that had been pregnant a couple of years before me that was about as far along as I was and she lost hers to and she knew what I was going through and it made me feel better to talk to her.


Everyone always tells us we need to try again but I just dont think that will ever happen as our hearts cant take it again if something were to happen.

I am so sorry that you are having to go through this and all I can offer is lots os thoughts and prayers and if you ever need anyone to listen please just PM me. Whatever you do dont blame yourself there was nothing you could have done to change it.

 

[Cantw8]

I'm so very sorry It truly is a very painful experience. I had two miscarriages almost 20 years ago and honestly, I don't think you ever get over it but time will ease your pain

 

[MUFFYCAT]

I'm so sorry.

 

[Hedy]

I'm so sorry.

 

[wilderness01]

 

[sunsprinkle24]

I am so sorry.

 

[4nana]

I am so very sorry .
May God grant you and DH faith, strength and hope through this very difficult time. God rest your little angel.