MulanMom
MK is my happy place!
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2002
I have always been able to come with a quick and when necessary sarcastic reply to these sort of remarks in the past.
The problem now is DS (10) is more aware of the remarks and stares and it causes him to feel embarrassed and bad about himself. Sometimes by responding I would cause him further discomfort.
You can view it as modeling for him how he should respond. I read these boards because my husband has a disability. We also have children who are adopted internationally and we are a very "public" adoptive family....i.e. one look and you know our family is built through adoption. People make many thoughtless comments, ask invasive questions, etc. When they were younger, it was easier to respond in a way. When they started understanding is when it became more challenging to come up with answers. At the same time, my children have to learn that just because people are rude enough to ask very personal questions, they are not required to be polite and answer. I don't advocate a rude response, but a clever one which makes the questioner think and doesn't compromise my children, but instead, empowers them.
Hopefully, your son will learn not to allow strangers to make him feel badly about himself. I know, easier said than done.