I'm starting to get nervous now (some nervous rambling, some venting)

[Rajah]

We're doing the two-loan option for our house. We have the first and largest of the two, but apparently the loan company balked after all (after saying we were approved or so we understood) on our second loan (over $400 that, if they'd asked, we could have produced using DH's 401K equiv -- just didn't use that at first because it would have required a 10 hour drive to get) so now we're having to find a new company for the second loan. Good news is the title company is the one making the arrangements. Bad news is we're supposed to close THURSDAY! I'm really getting nervous that things aren't going to fall into place exactly right.

Plus, we have no idea how much we're going to have to have on Thursday! They gave DH a "good faith estimate" two weeks ago based on some number estimates, but now that DH actually *has* some of those numbers, his estimate comes out to $1400 more than their good faith estimate. By tomorrow, we'll have that amount, but if it's much more than DH's estimate than we're going to be in trouble and WE WON'T KNOW UNTIL WEDNESDAY!

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!

But if we'd know that number on Tuesday, two days ahead of time, we'd be able to get it.

And to top it off, DH can't reach the loan officer (keeps playing phone tag) to told me to try and reach her -- BUT DIDN'T TELL ME WHAT TO ASK IF I DID REACH HER so now I'm sitting here paging him like crazy going "what am I supposed to ask her if I DO reach her" and my DH (D doesn't stand for dear in this phrase) ISN'T ANSWERING ME. So what am I supposed to do? Call the officer and go "Hi, my name is Tammi. My husband told me to call you and ask you some questions for our loan, but didn't tell me what those questions were so can you hold on for an hour while I page him to try and get a response, of course assuming our email system is working?"?????

I am SO SO SO SO SO sick of DH's job always keeping him so it can't get back to me when I have questions or problems. I swear I could get in the car and just start driving and would be half-way to my grandparents before he even realized I was out of touch, and all the way there before he could figure out how to reach me -- no, wait, not true. Today is Friday. I'd only make it half-way since tomorrow is Saturday and he'd wonder then.

Deep down, I feel this will happen and something's trying to tell me to not worry, stay calm, this is meant to be. But when DH won't call me back so I can *make* things happen, I really start worrying.

And, on top of that, I'm really getting frustrated with my ILs. I swear they didn't do anything in life because of an interest in, let alone passion for, it...they did everything because it was "expected" of them. Because they sure haven't been doing much to support DH on anything in his life, especially since we got married. I really feel sorry for DH (and this time it is dear). My parents are so helpful, loving, and supportive and are willing to drop everything to come help if we have trouble (like when DH had to go to the emergency room this spring). DH's parents heard DH was in the ER and said "Okay, I have this meeting at church, then this one at work, then this praise service then we'll be down to the ER to check on him."

 

[kejoda]

Tamie take a deep breath now another one. Everything will work out.

I know how you feel with the paging the dh bit. Tim never returned mine either. It just might be a man thing who knows.

as for the loan. I do hope it works out for you. If it doesn't mess things up can you possibly get a cash advance on your cc? I don't remember when they do the last credit search though.

Good luck, deep breaths and many hugs.

 

[Rajah]

Originally posted by kejoda
as for the loan. I do hope it works out for you. If it doesn't mess things up can you possibly get a cash advance on your cc? I don't remember when they do the last credit search though.

They do check that, so we can't do a cash advance on a CC -- what we *could* do, though, is either request some more from parents (my parents are already covering some of this for us, essentially what we would have had if we'd been able to close when we'd first intended in 2 months), or do a cash-advance on a direct deposit. My paycheck is deposited the *day* we close, and sometimes it's available that morning sometimes it's not. If it's not, we can request an advance against that. DH's paycheck will be deposited 2 working days after we close, so we could also do an advance against *that*. So we have avenues to get extra money if we had to, but we don't want to use them unless we have to and it sure would be nice to know.

DH did *finally* return my pages, so now I know what to ask the officer, just have to catch her. We're playing phone tag again.

 

[Pooh93]

Inhale..... exhale..... inhale..... exhale. {{hugs}} I hate not having control over things like this. It will all work out.

 

[kejoda]

Phone tag is so much fun.

Its hard to know if you have enough for the closing on a house. We decided to take out some of our 401k. Turns out that we did a smart thing since we would of lost all of that in the stock market and with it being invested in the house it has gone up in value. Of course we didn't know that then we just wanted to be in a house.

Its good to know that you can get it if you need it. Do you have a early closing? Ours were the first one and the sellers were late so we had to listen to the other realtor brag about how much money he had. He didn't have a usable brain but I guess you can't but that in the stores.

 

[WDWHound]

Sometimes I think that God invented real estate closings just to teach us patience and endurance.

Rajah, beleive it or not, this sort of mess is almost an expected thing when trying to close a mortage. Its stressful for everyone who goes through the process. The good news is that in most cases, these problems get solved. The process of financing a home can be annoying, worrysome, challenging and maddening, but it almost always has a happy ending.

I know its stressful, but hang in there. Solutions will be found. It all going to work out.

 

[Rajah]

Kejoda -- what's "early closing"? Our closing is at 11am. Not too early in the morning (so we don't have to fight rush hour traffic to get there because, of *course*, this place is on the complete opposite side of town).

Hound -- Thanks. Our Realtor also assured me this is normal and usually things are taken care of. Doesn't make it much easier to know that, though When it's so stressful on everyone, why don't they do something to revise the system so it's easier on all involved? I'm even getting the easy part, DH has the brunt of the stress, poor guy. I'm dealing with the builders to get all the issues there resoloved (they're resolving them without hassle, believe it or not), DH is the main one doing the loan stuff.

I think part of it is just pre-house jitters. I think it only sunk in yesterday afternoon that by this time next week, we'll *have a house*. This is something I've wanted for 2 years (not as long as some people, longer than others) and by this time next week it will happen (positive thinking, positive thinking). Realizing that something you didn't expect to happen for another 2-3 months and possibly not for another 6 is suddenly going to be reality <i>next week</i> just does something to the nerves, you know?

 

[LemonDietCoke]

Home buying is so stressful. When we were buying the loan agent suggest we do a two loan program like yours, EXCEPT that instead of a normal loan, we would borrow the money from my FIL at a reasonable interest rate. We didn't do it, but if things fall through, would that be an option for you (from your parents probably and not from your ILs-- they seem to live a very sad life).

 

[kejoda]

Sorry Tamie I just meant early in the morning.

 

[Rajah]

My parents are already contributing almost as much as they can. There's a little more buffer we can dip into if we *have* to, but that would have to be paid back after my check cleared on Friday and/or after DH's check cleared on Tuesday -- be easier to do the advance on a direct deposit. We already asked DH's parents if they could contribute anything (even if it were just held "in reserve") and they said no. I can't believe that a household with no kids living at home, with two working professionals, with one car that has to be fully paid off by now and a second that is also probably paid off, and with a house that is either paid off by now or very close to it can't afford even $100 when my parents, who have only one working professional, have one car payment, and have a house payment are able to give us enough to make this happen. DH's parents weren't even able to contribute an <i>opinion</i> on the house until <i>after</i> our walk-through when we were supposed to report any problems. This is an issue because DH's dad is/was a licensed architect. We could *really* have used his advice on the roof and other issues the inspector found, but DH's dad (I refuse to consider him my father, even "in law") couldn't even find the time to come down and *look* at the house until yesterday. 4 days *after* the walk-through, 2 weeks *after* we found the house. And after my parents were able to come down 5 or 6 times. Once again showing their lack-of-support for their son.

 

[A kid at heart]

It doesn't sound to me like you're actually financially ready yet to buy a house. Are you really going to be able to afford the mortgage payment on top of everythng else?
But thena gain I am so confused with reading what you wrote, I really don't understand it.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

Didn't you say that you still had your apartment through the month of September? Maybe you would be better off delaying the closing for a month or 2 and building up your savings account a little more.

I know it sounds painful, but a little more time to make sure that you are getting the best mortgage deal could save you really big $$$$$ over the long haul.

 

[fklhou]

Tammi

This is all normal for a house closing. There will always be little surprises along the way because that is how the process works. Good luck on the closing.

 

[LemonDietCoke]

I can't believe that a household with no kids living at home, with two working professionals, with one car that has to be fully paid off by now and a second that is also probably paid off, and with a house that is either paid off by now or very close to it can't afford even $100 when my parents, who have only one working professional, have one car payment, and have a house payment are able to give us enough to make this happen.

No offense meant, but it is your house and in no way the responsibility of your parents-- in fact, that is exactly why we went with PMI instead of asking FIL for a loan (there is no way it would have been a gift and my parents weren't in a financial place to help). Maybe his parents are feeling that financially it isn't the right time for you to buy a house.

Just a thought.

 

[Rajah]

Originally posted by A kid at heart
It doesn't sound to me like you're actually financially ready yet to buy a house. Are you really going to be able to afford the mortgage payment on top of everythng else?
But thena gain I am so confused with reading what you wrote, I really don't understand it.

Yes, we are. We're just closing earlier than we expected to.

 

[Rajah]

Originally posted by LemonDietCoke
No offense meant, but it is your house and in no way the responsibility of your parents

No, it's not, but to have my parents bending over backwards to help us do anything we can to get into this house (which *yes*, we will be able to afford once we're in it, don't worry all -- we wouldn't be doing this if we couldn't) and have his parents pretty much refuse to do anything *including* just come *look* at the house really makes me angry.

And as for closing later -- the latest they would push it is a week into Sept, which would give us one paycheck more and that's it. And most of that would be countered by the extra taxes we'd end up having to pay, so it's actually better to close this month than to close next month.

 

[CarolA]

Breath deeply.
I found it amazing that no one can tell you how much money to bring to the closing! I did mine on a Friday and I was out of town until that morning. Since they won't take a personal check I did a wire transfer based on the latest estimate a few days earlier. Well of course I get there and they want more money. Basically at that point they had no choice but to take the check. (The closing company did act like they were going to stroke however!)

That night I sat in my apartment and cried. I was so scared of what I had just done. Now I look back and wonder what took me so long! It sounds like you will be fine.

 

[helenabear]

Wishing you all the best Tammi with the closing. I did a similar thing with the money for the downpayment. How I kept calculating it was about $800 different. Not that it was a big deal but I wanted all the money right there in my checking account (not sitting in savings) and I needed to know if I had to go transfer money from a different bank or not. Well it turns out my calculations were wrong and theirs was only off by about $50 from what they had told me. I did all that worrying for nothing.

 

[nativetxn]

<b><i>*deep cleansing breath*</b></i> sweetie. Calm down, it's all going to work out one way or another.


{{{HUGS}}} I know this is nerve wracking for you.

 

[Sharon A.]

It's only $400 you need to raise right? You could probably earn nearly that just from a garage sale. If you have any "big" items you aren't using anymore, you can take them to a reseller or pawn shop and see what you can get.

When dh lost his job about 6 years ago, we sold everything we could. I got the most from old books (I had a ton) and kid's clothes.

What about an advance on a credit card? I'd have to think the interest rate on a second mortgage for a first-time home buyer is pretty high already, The cash advance rate probably isn't that much more.

Anyhow, good luck. I hope it all works out for you. Just remember, even if this house doesn't work out, there will be others.