Mitch & Tiffiny's December Wishes Wedding!

[TiffinyKaye]

Hello everyone!

My name is Tiffiny, and I live in Utah with my fiance, Mitch. Our mutual love of Disney was established very early on in our relationship...and as time progressed, as I'm sure it's with mostly everyone here...I just knew he was "the one." When he proposed December 8th, 2013 in front of Spaceship Earth at Epcot...there was absolutely no question that we wanted to make sure that we held the actual ceremony in Epcot as well. Being our favorite park, and all the wonderful memories we have to date there--there's no other place we'd like to get married.

I've been in touch with Disney Fairytale Weddings & Honeymoons on and off for the past year. I'm one of those crazy "planner" people...and it's just killed me to KNOW that I wanted a Disney wedding, and knowing I couldn't do anything about it until at least one month before the actual year or 8-month mark (depending on Wishes or Escape). I've had a lot of the preliminary questions answered by Disney...gone back and forth a ZILLION times on the package we're going with...and we've finally just decided that we're doing Wishes. Price wise, Escape is probably the best way to go for us (because really--we think $125/person is just CRAZY)--but given that my antsy "planner" personality is kicking in...we have decided that the $2K-$3K extra it's going to cost us to feed everyone an insanely over-priced breakfast is just "worth it" to have the peace of mind of being able to book our date a year out. Plus, the only Epcot option available on the Escape plan is Canada...when we really have our hearts set on Japan.

So...here I am...November 11th. This Friday, I will be talking to our initial planner person and trying to get everything we need to get done absolutely done so that a contract can be drawn up and signed to put our desired December 8th day into stone. Does anyone have any tips or pointers this far out? I know I could be talking to a black hole, given how many people are on these boards...but I just want solidarity with other Disney brides.

BTW--anyone else getting married in 2014 kind of upset that ALL the prices went up by insane amounts on every single service Disney seems to offer? Thank goodness the minimum expenditure is still $12K on a Wishes wedding (we're aiming to max out at no more than $15K)--but it feels like you almost just can't get hardly anything for that price anymore. I started mentally planning out my wedding last January based on prices then, imagining that we might see a $100-$200/per feature increase. Some of the things--like the venues--have gone up almost $1,000 from where they were before. It's not like Disney doesn't just OWN THE PROPERTY. Sigh.

I'll stop complaining.

Tiffiny

 

[Summer Daydream]

Congrats! I hope everything went well and you had good news wen you contacted DFTW.

 

[TiffinyKaye]

Thanks Summer Daydream!

 

[TiffinyKaye]

Okay, so my planning journal hasn't been going very well because:

1). I've been super busy.

2). I've been super iffy on the whole Wishes wedding because of cost.

3). I can't book the darn thing yet...so "planning" doesn't really work when you can't even guarantee the venue yet.


SO...there have been some developments since my last post that make me more confident about "planning." So, here it goes.

First off, I have to say that I am NOT impressed with Disney's communication. You'd think for such a huge corporation that wants as much money as possible, they'd really focus in on the customer service aspect. I have had such problems getting them to even get back to me when I have questions. Hello Disney! I can't give you money if you won't talk to me. Not to mention, my wedding is important to me. If you ignore me--it doesn't make me confident about the actual planning process (once I get to that point).

That said...I'm still a sucker for Disney, and desperately want a Disney wedding that will be a wonderful memory forever. And, I also think it's probably partially not the fault of the consultants at the initial level. My consultant said they have like 6 of them in the office--so I guess that I can't hold it against the consultants. They've probably got hundreds (if not thousands) of brides contacting them every day about having a Disney wedding. If I blame anyone, I blame DISNEY for not hiring enough people.

So, communication problems aside, I have persisted. Finally, at the 13th month mark (November), I spoke with my consultant and we are now "penciled" in for December 8, 2014 in the Japan pavilion of Epcot on a Wishes wedding. As a required part of Wishes, we also have to have a reception--so, we're planning on the Living Seas. As we don't have a ton of money to spend on decorations (for both the ceremony AND reception ), Living Seas is a great option because it's an aquarium! So says my consultant, at least....she convinced me. For the $500 venue rental fee for LS...the experience will probably make better memories for our guests than any amount of flowers at the reception.

I have to say...my initial quote on what we're doing for the wedding initially gave me a stroke...but you know what? A Disney wedding will probably be the ONLY nice event I'll ever be able to have. When else can you have something like a Disney wedding and feel like a princess, without coming off like a complete egomaniac? Exactly.

So...here's the budget (thus far...I expect this to probably top out at $20K ): $16,853.81

CRAZY, right?! And that's based on 25 people!!! We are good though. Me and DF are not having kids, we already have a house, and we have a solid plan to save enough for the wedding. Plus, we plan on getting wedding insurance...so if something AWFUL happens...hopefully we can get the deposit back.

Here are some of the major things that we're not compromising on (and where all the cost is coming from...):

Mickey & Minnie
Major Domo
Photography (Dreams package, plus a Magic Kingdom photo session)

 

[er3465]

Welcome! You are getting so close to finding out if you get your date ! As you said it is a lot of money, but the memories will be amazing!

 

[TiffinyKaye]

I have not been into my planning journal for a while because I realized that there wasn't much to say since I couldn't really "plan" without knowing 100% that my venues were all locked in. I've been hanging around and driving everyone nuts around the board with my questions (probably driving Carrie insane in particular)--but it has been a helpful exercise to me in kind of getting an idea of what I'm in for on this potentially (likely) expensive adventure. But...I couldn't REALLY be excited until the official "year" mark...which was yesterday, December 8th. As yesterday was Sunday though...today was the dreaded "drawing" for my venues. I gave my choices to my wedding consultant Kristi, and got an email back saying that I'd probably know within 24-48 hours. As Disney has been really horrible at communicating with me (literally--I'll send them a question and NEVER hear back until I email the same thing a second or third time), I figured I'd be in suspense until Thursday.

NOPE!

I found out today...though I still have to get around to getting the room block figured out, signing the contract and paying them their blood money...I GOT THEM ALL!!!! Including my overly-expensive, but totally awesome dessert party!

So, here's the rundown of what the venues for the day:

Ceremony
Epcot- Japan Pavilion

Reception
The Living Seas

Dessert Party
UK Lochside


The price is going to just kill me, I think--but you know what? I am SO happy I decided to do Wishes. Barring absolute financial disaster, fiance and I made the right choice by doing Wishes instead of our initial desire to do Escape because we got in early, and we got our stuff. I can't wait to see what it looks like on the wedding day.

So, whenever DF gets out of the shower (he's one of those people who like to take hour-long showers)--we plan on sitting down and trying to piece together our room block so that we can get the contract...then sign the contract, and then be ready to go.

Which will then bring me to one of the hardest decisions I'll have to make about the entire wedding....photography. Picking my photography was something that I though should be easy and awesome--I'd just have Disney do it! They're Disney, right? They do supremely excellent work in everything they do. Sadly, no. The more I look at Disney Photography photos...while they're good...I wouldn't say that they necessarily achieve the 'look' I want for my wedding (i.e., out-of-focus shots, poorly framed--and you don't even get your image disc of digital negatives!!!!).

Suffice to say...picking the photography has been a bear. And still is. (No offense to bears.) We still haven't decided 100% yet between Disney Fine Art Photography and Regina Hyman (a former DFAP alum). We are leaning ever so strongly towards Regina...but being the "I have to be the first in line!" mentality that I have (which is why I went Wishes in the first place)...I have this nagging fear inside me that not only will I not get a date to do the photos that accommodates our travel plans, but I also won't get the photographer I want to do my photo shoots (Cricket). On Regina's side though...Regina gives you WAY more than Disney does for the price. And her photos are stunning in many regards. She's my second choice right after Root Photography...but the difference between the two (for us as a couple) is that the Roots end up being absolutely DESTROYING our budget...where Regina will only get us to go over what we were spending on Disney by like....$400. AND we still get more products with Regina than we would with either Disney or the Roots...

(For those of you who don't know or are new to the boards--you can only book your photo session in the Magic Kingdom or Epcot 45 days in advance if you don't use Disney's services for your photography.)

So...that's where I am. More to come. Must talk with DF.

 

[alyaki]

Congratulations on getting your date, Tiffiny! I'm envious of you managing to add in a dessert party - with the way pricing was restructured for 2015 weddings, I'm not sure we'll be able to (still haven't talked to Raist about one).

 

[TiffinyKaye]

I hope you're able to Alyaki!

I'm not sure if w'd be doing a dessert party if we were under the 2015 pricing structure either. I don't know why they changed, in all honesty. I think they'd be more likely to get people to come have their weddings if they gave them more flexibility--which the old pricing system did--and STILL made Disney boatloads of cash.

For me and DF...I think we are meeting all the minimum anyway with the way we're going...so who knows? We may have done the dessert party under 2015 pricing. I haven't had a chance to figure it out. All I know is--the dessert party was an afterthought of mine. Originally, we weren't going to do it because we were trying to keep as close to the minimum as possible. As weddings often do, though, after a degree of planning the elements we would like to have--the whole thing just sort of spiraled out of control, so I had a "Screw it!" moment and just did it. We're already NOT spending money on a lot of floral decor (which makes me sad), but we'll have a dessert party instead. We have the money already saved up to cover it...we just weren't intending to spend it. And now, we are...and I have a feeling that, barring some other financial disaster that would really make me sad...I don't think it's something I'll regret.

It's amazing how you'll end up justifying it to yourself--but I think there's a chance you might. I have a friend who keeps giving me ENDLESS crap about how much we're spending, to which I remind him that he's traveled the world COUNTLESS times and spent probably MORE money than we ever will on our wedding on going to other places. I have decided that it just really comes down to priorities. Some people want to visit every country on the globe (which is great!)--me and DF? We just want a super awesome Disney wedding.

Tiffiny

 

[Bewitch324]

So excited to hear you are having your ceremony in Japan, I think that will be beautiful!! I haven't seen many other brides planning for that location, so it will be really special and unique for the two of you as well.

Isn't that confirmation just the best feeling? That was when I felt it was all finally REAL!!!

Congratulations on your date and your venues and being "OFFICIALLY" a Disney Bride!

Can't wait to read more about your plans!!!

Brooke

 

[LittleKittyMarie]

Congratulations on your engagement and getting your date! I don't think I've ever read a Japan bride PJ, how exciting! It's such a beautiful location. The Epcot locations are so wonderful because you don't need a lot of decor, it's all there already. looking forward to more!

 

[TiffinyKaye]

So excited to hear you are having your ceremony in Japan, I think that will be beautiful!! I haven't seen many other brides planning for that location, so it will be really special and unique for the two of you as well.

Isn't that confirmation just the best feeling? That was when I felt it was all finally REAL!!!

Congratulations on your date and your venues and being "OFFICIALLY" a Disney Bride!

Can't wait to read more about your plans!!!

Brooke

Thanks Brooke and Nicole!!!! I hope it's as beautiful as I have it in my head. I really do. And yes! Awesome feeling about being "confirmed." You want to know what would be the best feeling though? If they'd actually give me my freaking contract and let me pay my deposit. LOL!



Okay...there will be another post eventually...I'm waiting until Friday though in hopes that I actually have a contract by then....

Tiffiny

 

[TiffinyKaye]

Hello everyone! It's been a while since I've posted to my planning journal, but that's because I've actually been busy planning! Yahoo! I'm personally pretty happy about it, but I can tell you that I've never gotten so many funny looks from people in my life. We're just barely under a year, and all of the wedding vendors think we're crazy for doing everything so early. I'm not sure if we're actually just crazy, or if wedding vendors are just used to shotgun weddings. When do brides in other states normally start the major planning process? Do vendors typically look at you like you're crazy when you start booking things a year out?

Our plan is not only to do the Disney wedding, but also a smaller reception here in Utah for our family and friends (since not everyone is invited to the Disney wedding). So, here's what we've been doing for both:

1. Signed our Disney Wishes contract! Yay! I am OFFICIALLY going to be a Disney bride. This is a really awesome concept when I'm not thinking about how much money it's going to cost. So, I'm trying to ignore that part. I'm SUPER happy though. We sent the contract a few days ago via FedEx, and so now I'm just waiting for Disney to take the $2,000 deposit out of my checking account. Thank goodness this step is finally out of the way, because it was the one thing I was waiting on before I really started with everything else. December 8, 2014, baby!

2. Rented our Utah reception venue. We're going to have the reception at a greenhouse called Cactus and Tropicals. It's a beautiful location, and they'll let us bring in our own vendors without a fee. They were also one of the cheapest locations we looked at. They're a massively awesome deal for the money and location, so I couldn't be happier on that. Our reception is scheduled for January 10, 2015—as we felt we wouldn't be able to get that many guests to the Utah reception if we did it after we got home in December 2014 (with Christmas and stuff taking up people's time). The lady there commented that we were "super early," but that it was interesting to see someone actually PLANNING early to make sure that they got everything they wanted, as opposed to the typical Utah wedding that is planned a max of three months in advance.

3. Designed our wedding invitations. They're cute and adorable…but not "done" yet. We thought it would be easy, but we're currently trying to figure out how to get parent names on the invitation when we have very little space left on them. Originally they weren’t on there…but then my mom was like, "You really need to have your parents names on there so that when we send invitations to members of the family you've never met, they know who you are. You'll get more presents that way." I think it's silly, personally. I had no intention of sending it to people who didn't know who I was, and presents are really not the first thing on my mind. Plus—why would someone who doesn't know me feel compelled to give me a present (or money) if they don't know me? Regardless—they're "pretty much" done, and I've put down half of the money on them. So, when I pay for all of them, they'll print them.

4. I went through a bit of disappointment when I found out that Patricia LaJeune wasn't available to do my makeup…but I decided to go with Beaute Speciale and have already put down a deposit. We've got a lot of scheduling things to work out, and it's honestly just too early to figure it out yet. I've got to start talking to Disney soon about when I have to be inside the park and stuff so that I can schedule makeup and photography around that…but, at least I've put down the deposit and have makeup ready to go for that day.

5. We've also put down the deposit on our photography. It was a tough decision between Regina Hyman (a former Disney photographer) and Root Photography (who everyone on the board here knows did Carrie Hayward's wedding). I honestly felt Regina was an awesome photographer, but loved the Roots too (I think I've been in love with Root Photography for over a year). In weighing our options though, while I felt Regina was the best deal for your money, the DF preferred the style of the Roots more. Rather than make the DF go with my overall pick (quality and time for the money) of Regina, we ultimately decided on the Roots because we both like their work. I wanted us to have someone we both wanted, rather than someone only I wanted. I think, overall though, we will be happy with the Roots. Like I said earlier—I have been absolutely in love with their work for over a year. When I first saw their work on Carrie's wedding, I told myself then that they'd be the people I used. They originally scared me off with their prices—but DF has agreed to pony up part of the dough to make sure that we can use them. So…people who initially weren’t in our price range now are. I think our photos will be GORGEOUS.

6. With the reception venue in Utah booked, we also decided to get our linens. Though Cactus and Tropicals will allow us to use our own vendors, they had a specific "preferred vendor" that does linens (called Specialty Linens) that would give us a sweet deal. They REALLY looked at us like we were crazy when we walked into their store and booked a linen rental well a year in advance to the event (remember, being January 10, 2015). They still commented that it was awesome though. Like the Cactus and Tropicals lady, they said that we differed from the Utah brides they normally deal with. In fact, they've had people call the day before the event asking to place linen orders. So—we've got nothing to worry about, and our tables are going to be adorable. Our wedding colors are red, black, and yellow (Mickey Mouse colors)—so what we'll do is have a red tablecloth with a black overlay, and a yellow bow on the chairs.

7. Bought 160 wedding rose stamps before the price increase of 2014. Hopefully we only send out a max of 160 invites…because I don't want to buy more stamps!

8. Built a wedding website. Though we're not sending our invitations out until probably 4 months in advance of the wedding to notify people of the reception (the wedding invitees will actually be informed personally well before that date), it was important to me to have the wedding website address on our invitations for the purpose of allowing people to visit it and do a virtual RSVP and view our honeymoon registry. All the information is on the website, so it should hopefully make it easy to do so. Additionally, I was really surprised…but it's a Disney wedding website. I don't know if we have it because we started our registry over six months ago (out of curiosity), or if it's something that's normally through the Disney Honeymoon site…but we have it, and it's adorable. Anyone interested in visiting it can do so at: http://disney.honeymoonwishes.com/TiffinyAndMitch

9. Built our registry (which is linked to our wedding website). This was also something I wanted to make sure we had started so that we could print the link on our invitations. DF and I have been living in sin for over two years now. We have a house and everything we need to live as a married couple (because that's effectively what we've been doing for a while now). So, our registry is just asking for Disney money for our honeymoon so that we can hopefully do awesome stuff. We don't expect anything at all—but for people who DO want to do something for us to fulfill their "conventional obligation" of a gift for the married couple, we'd by far prefer Disney money than anything else.

I'll post pictures of the invitation when I get a chance. They're super cute.

Happy planning, everyone—and a happy new year!

Tiffiny

 

[TiffinyKaye]

A quick update to my planning journal (as quick as a long-winded person can be). It's a goal of mine (a New Year's resolution, to be honest) to update this planning journal at least once a week—even if I have nothing particularly "new" to say. I don't think it's fair that I've taken advantage of all the awesome advice and examples provided by other Disney brides who have shared their wisdom, and not return the favor. (Though it's arguable that anything I happen to have to impart about my experience could be considered 'wisdom.')

So, the first thing is…even though in the last post I mentioned that we had gotten most things squared away with Disney, it was actually this week (Thursday, to be exact) that we got the OFFICIAL notification that our Disney wedding was happening. We Fed-Ex'd our contract to Disney on Monday December 30th and was told it wouldn't be there until Friday December 3rd. Imagine my surprise when I got an email from Fed Ex telling me it had been delivered Thursday, December 2nd! I didn't get the actual email from my consultant's assistant letting me know that it had been received, however, until Friday December 3rd…and then the simultaneously dreaded and awesome hit to my credit card for the two-grand deposit. Even though it was like a punch to the gut, it was pretty darned exhilarating. Barring total financial disaster or ruin—at this juncture, I'm REALLY on the path now to being a Disney bride. For realsy realsy.

So my consultant's assistant let me know that we probably wouldn't hear from anyone again until next week or the week after that. I guess we have to be "assigned" to a planner, and I'm just crossing my fingers for one that isn't crappy and has great communication skills. I've seen some lousy things on the boards about Disney planners not being the best communicators…but I've decided I'm going to try to be as patient as I can (within reason). I've come to realize that Disney will give you whatever you want (for a price)—but they will do it in their own sweet time, and they're super cheap when it comes to labor. So, it wouldn't surprise me if they've only got like ten planners (maybe less) to handle the over a thousand weddings they do every year. Everyone's paying money just like me—and many are paying more than I am. Plus, some people have their events much sooner than I will. They get priority. I get that.

I just have to hope that *my* wedding is also a priority when the time comes.

Additional Disney wedding planning includes adding to my bridal party and the selection of our officiant (and the drama therein). Originally, I had decided I didn't WANT a bridal party at all. It's expensive (because you have to buy all their dresses and crap), and it's really no longer necessary anymore that I have people in the party to distract the evil spirits. My sister was very adamant about being my maid of honor though…so I felt a little guilted into it. Plus, my fiancé really wanted to have his best friend be the best man—so we felt it'd be fine to keep it to a maid of honor and best man, just to keep it even and cool.

As the planning has gone on though—I realized that it wouldn't be fair to also somehow include my step-sister. I actually wanted her to be a bridesmaid, because I felt it was important to include her as a family member in such a special way. We weren't always fond of each other (particularly early on in the relationship of my step-father and mother). Over the last few years though, we have gotten a lot closer and a lot more respectful of each other. Heck—I even realized that I LOVED my step-sister like a sister. I'm lucky to have her in my life, and I really wanted her involved.

The problem was…it does throw off the balance in my bridal party, and my biological sister and step-sister sometimes have had issues with each other in the recent past (funny—because it's like the relationships reversed). I asked the step-sister to be a bridesmaid before asking my real sister (because it's really not her decision anyway)…but I knew that it MIGHT actually upset her. So—I needed to find a tactful way to bring it up.

And then, yesterday, my mom let it slip. Sigh. So the sister is "okay," but thinks it's weird and kind of resents it, I think. It's my wedding though…so she really doesn't have a say.

More drama…the sister has made "demands" concerning her dress (the cost) and her bouquet. Another "ugh" on my side—because it's my wedding, and I'm only having a bridal party FOR HER in the first place. It upsets me greatly…so we'll see where things go. I'm pretty sure she's not getting a bouquet…she's probably getting some single roses to carry (a practical suggestion made by Carrie Hayward in her book). So…we'll see.

The officiant is quick. The step-sister's boyfriend is a pretty funny dude that both me and my fiancé have bonded with too. He's awesome (and he loves "Star Wars"—another awesome thing about him). He and my step-sister both work at Sea World and a big part of their job is speaking to the public—so I am more than confident that he'd be able to effectively officiate, be non-religious, not boring, and be funny. So, I asked him the other day if he wanted to become ordained in the Universal Life Church (a sneaky way of asking if he'd officiate). He will…so I can't wait.

Other things on the wedding planning front—I'm just trying to plan the reception here. Initially I thought I was just going to do the cheapest thing I could, but the more I realize what I want…I think I'm going to do a bit more. I went to a wedding show with my mom today and we looked at DJs and photobooths…things that I was pretty sure I wasn't going to have at my wedding. The photobooths seemed fun though, and I'd have those pictures as lasting memories of everyone who showed up. It's over $500 though for me to have one…so I'm not sure if it's the best use of my money. Additionally, *I* really want a wedding cake for our Utah reception, but the DF isn't sure. We planned on doing a sheet cake from Costco for our guests (because it's good, AND cheap)—but we also may try to have a photographer for our Utah reception, in which case, I want an awesome cake too.

Additionally, we want light refreshments, in addition to cake, at the reception here. Nothing super fancy…just minor finger foods. We ran into an awesome caterer called Mon Cherie Catering that can do "themed" stuff, so I think she's the right one. She said that they did a "Lord of the Rings" wedding a few months ago…so I think she can easily execute it. The question is—how expensive is that going to be? Do I want it THAT badly?

Nothing has been decided right now—but I have to say I'm torn. Initially, I just wanted to spend the bulk of the money on the wedding and do something dinky here. Now, it's looking like we'll STILL be spending the bulk of the money on the wedding, and doing something dinky-by-comparison (but, in the big scheme of things, not dinky at all). I'm definitely trying to not let it get to me…but it's hard. On the upside, I at least keep justifying it by saying, "You've had two years to save—and you're paying for most things monthly anyway as they come up. Spreading the costs out makes it feel like nothing!" That's true—until I look at the spreadsheet I've made for myself to keep track of overall costs. LOL!!! I was keeping it mostly for the brides on this site. I plan to post it so that brides who want to do something similar can know what it might cost (in my market). It still scares me though.

On the upside—I still feel remarkably prepared compared to many other brides in Utah. I just attended a wedding today of a friend who got engaged the day after Thanksgiving. THE DAY AFTER THANKSGIVING. Today is JANURY 4th!!!! How do you plan a wedding in that time? They did…and you can tell that it took a month. Cute and sweet and cheap (which is probably what they were going for). And maybe they weren't actually interested in having anything more grandiose than what they did. I still can't help but thinking that they probably could have done more though, had they just been patient and held off for AT LEAST a few more months to save and do something awesome. At least their cake was cute though…and we got to dance to "What Does The Fox Say?"

More horror stories? Being at the bridal show today, and there were people GETTING MARRIED THIS MONTH!!! I get maybe just getting engaged and doing a shotgun wedding…but if you're going to do that, why even bother attending a bridal show and hiring people? It's just…insane. It'd drive me crazy.

And I keep reminding myself—it'd drive ME crazy. Not those brides. Good on them, I guess, for being able to throw together something in such a short period of time. I hope they enjoy it.


Kay...will stop now. Sorry it's so long. In the next post, I'll see if I can post some links to my Pintrest on stuff I've already started looking at. For example--the cake at Disney!

Tiffiny

 

[andeesings]

Tiffiny- I've been in about EIGHT bridal parties--- and NOT ONCE has the bride bought me a dress. Not once. I've always gotten a gift from the bride (usually jewelry but sometimes brides are a bit more clever and destination brides are even more clever, given their gift often has something to do with the destination). But why are you not having a bridal party because you think you need to pay for their dresses? I've never heard of that, ever. Brides should be respectful of their maid's budgets, but heck even then for my brother's wedding my sister in law slammed me by loving a $300 gown. I sucked it up and plunked down my visa. It was her wedding. Go to David's Bridal, choose something cheap, and tell your sisters, as Lori says from Say Yes to the Dress Bridesmaids-- pay up and shut up!! It's YOUR DAY!

 

[wiigirl]

Congrats

 

[TiffinyKaye]

Hi Andee--

I should clarify that it's my fault. I have been way more fortunate than you in how many people have asked me to be a part of their bridal parties--a grand total of one! In that one party I was a part of, I was also asked to pay for my own dress--and the bride wasn't particularly respectful of people's budgets either. Between the dress and the alterations--it was about $250. Maybe that's "normal" for a bridesmaid dress...but I felt like it was a pretty chunk of change for me. Not only that, but I felt like I was going out of my way to purchase something that *I* would never wear again for someone ELSE'S day. It's a significant amount of money, and I felt it was stupid.

So, at that very moment--*I* as a bride decided that I wouldn't put my maids out. *I* would pay for their dresses, and anything else about their involvement--short of their getting there and their rooms. My logic on the situation is--it's my day. Why should I make someone else pay big bucks to look a way that *I* want them to out of their own pockets? And if a bridesmaid couldn't afford to get to the ceremony--then that's fine. I don't expect them to come. The wedding is for me and my groom, and anyone else who comes is doing it for themselves--not for my benefit. (Heck--I would have done Memories if my DF would have let me).

THAT'S what pisses me off about the whole situation though. I felt I had a right to be peeved when the bride was asking ME to spend MY own money to look the way she wanted me to. If it's my own money--I should be able to look however the heck I want (within reason and in her colors). I'm aware that most brides ask their parties to buy their own attire. So, if I'm being the type of bride that says, "Hey! Be in my party--and I'll pay for your stuff!"--I think that'd give me a little right to say, "HEY! SHUT UP AND WEAR WHAT I TELL YOU!" We went to brunch today, and I about threw her out of the wedding altogether and said to hell with a bridal party. The only reason she's in is for my mother's benefit (because it'd really break her heart for us to fight beyond what we already are over the subject).

It frustrates me just thinking about it. She wants to make all sorts of demands about her floral too. It just irks me.

Back to laundry...

Tiffiny

 

[October 2014 Bride]

I just found your planning report and have subscribed. I absolutely love your locations. I would have loved to have got married in Epcot but we have a lot of small children at our wedding so having an early start wasn't feasible. Japan is an amazing location. We are also having our dessert party at UK Lochside so another good choice. Can't wait to hear more about your planning.

 

[TiffinyKaye]

Hi everyone!

Yes, I'm bad. It has been FOREVER since I posted in here. Like…FOREVER. I was going through a spell with work stress, everything stress, and mental health stress. It hasn't all gone away yet, but enough to where I feel ready to get back into writing these blogs periodically again to let people know where I am in the planning process. I will do my best—as we speak, I have a cat sprawled across me trying to stop me from typing. Anyone else ever have the same problems?

I'll say this now…it's probably been a good thing that it's been a while. That way, hopefully I only hit the "highlights" of the planning process, instead of writing an all-out novel.

So, the biggest things to happen thus far…

Wedding invitations are DONE! We actually got them printed in January…but planned out all of the text and layout in December as soon as we knew what we absolutely knew the dates. They're pretty cute, if I don't say so myself. They're not super elegant (which would have been cool, but pricey, I think)—but they represent me and my fiancé well and, actually, have provided all sorts of inspiration for the cake (will get there soon).


I also now have an official Disney planner. Danny Rogerson, and his assistant Amanda Ingle. Anyone else have them? They both seem very nice and professional. I especially love how helpful Danny has been in helping me to try to figure out a "surprise" for my fiancé. One of the things I'd really love to do for my groom at the Disney wedding is surprise him with something really unique and "magical" to REALLY make the wedding for him. Danny's had his thinking cap on, and so have I. The problem is, we can't just do something like announce it to the park, or have a lightsaber duel with Darth Vader (an option presented by Danny that *I* personally would love for myself!). Mitch isn't an "attention" person. He dislikes attention on him so much that if you tried to sing "Happy Birthday" to him in a restaurant, he'd literally get up and walk out. Don't ask me how he's handling all the "attention" of a wedding—but he seems cool with it because the attention is on both of us, not just him. So…the other ideas are to see if we can have some sort of permanent way of commemorating the ceremony at Epcot (like the plaques they have at the front of the park), or something of that nature. Or like if they have a "backstage tour" of some of the animals at the aquarium at the Living Seas. He would LOVE to meet the turtles they have there.

Today, actually, I came up with a "surprise" that I think we'll definitely end up going with, if not a mixture of elements (depending on what Danny comes up with). Mitch is weird…he's not a "cake" person at all. I think the only reason he's okay with us having a wedding cake is because I love cake so much, and it's tradition. As far as whether he'll eat much of it? Not really. So, I was meandering around the Dreamboards a bit (Disney's limited version of Pintrest) and found something PERFECT. While Mitch isn't really big on cake…he loves rice krispy treats. And on the Dreamboards…I found someone else had a Mickey Mouse-shaped rice krispy treat, complete with icing to delineate his features.

SO COOL. Mitch won't eat cake, but he'll eat a truckload of rice krispy treats if given the chance. So…I think that's what we're going to do. The rice krispy treat cake is so adorable too. It'll be the perfect "grooms cake" and a surprise for him. The real trick now will be trying to make sure that he doesn't find out about it until we walk into Living Seas. I've told my planner that I want to just pay for it myself before he even gets a chance to see it on the BEO…so, hopefully we can keep that secret.

Also kinda not sure what's going on with the Disney wedding. It's so hard being this far out and knowing you can't really do much. On the upside, we DO have our planning session scheduled for September 9, 2014. Hopefully my step-sister and her boyfriend will be able to go with us. We're also not close enough yet (I think) to be able to book rooms through our DVC for the wedding. As soon as we are, we'll book rooms for ourselves and our parents, and then have the rest of our guests that we KNOW are coming book their own. Our options for people other than our parents are Pop Century and Port Orleans French Quarter.

What else has happened…I mentioned in my last post that we have linens and we have a location for our Utah reception. So, we've now just been shopping around for cake and catering. We've had a few tastings with different cake people, and we have a few more we'd like to get done before we actually pick our person. We are strongly leaning towards a woman who's business is called Cake Dame (cakedame.com for anyone interested in seeing her work). Not only does her skill level seem right on par with what I want for my cake, but she's fairly reasonable in her pricing, and her cake is A-MAZ-ING. No joke—we tested out a white, chocolate, and red velvet with several different fillings. She had this vanilla bean flavoring that I didn't think would be that great—but it was spectacular, AND it went with all the different cake flavors. So…while we're not 100% who we're using yet…there is a strong leaning for her direction.

We had a catering appointment yesterday with a woman who, oddly enough, instantly recognized me and my mother—because I look so much like my mom when my mom was in her early 20's and dropped me off to be babysat! How crazy is that? The woman that we're looking to have cater my wedding actually babysat me when I was pretty much and infant until about age 2. I didn't remember her at all, but my mom certainly did. It was kind of wild. Small world! Anyway—she is all onboard with trying to figure out how to make "Disney"-themed foods. I was really at a loss…so we'll see what she comes up with. I came up with an idea last night though that, if I'm not in love with her ideas, I'll probably suggest.

The problem with "Disney" food is that I feel like there aren't many hot small foods that "scream" Disney. There are some desserts that we could easily make into a Disney thing…but the cake is our dessert. So, the trick will be to find "Disney" foods that are sort of snacky and light for our two hour reception. So—if I don't LOVE her ideas, the one I came up with last night was to do an " Epcot International Food and Wine Festival" thing. We are getting married in Japan in Epcot…and Epcot is our favorite park. It just seems so fun to me to essentially bring that small part of Epcot into our reception. And it'd be fairly easy too. Just pick a bunch of small finger-food type things from different countries around the world (if not just the countries IN Epcot)…and there ya go. Serve wine as the alcohol, and I think we'd have it.

I've also added to the Utah reception is a photo booth. Initially, I wasn't going to do this because I didn't think we needed one that would really "fit" with what we're doing. There's a service out there called TapSnap that I found though that is a "digital photo booth" that you can add in a background via green screen. I ended up getting a deal on it with a free green screen (normally the green screen itself is an INSANE $200)—so for the price of a regular photo booth offered by most vendors, I'll be able to get this one. And the reason that it's so much better for our theme than any other photo booth?

Green-screened backdrop of either Cinderella's castle or Spaceship Earth. I haven't decided yet. Obviously, I'll take the picture myself to provide as the backdrop so that we're not violating any copyright laws…but dude, I am SO, SO HAPPY about that decision. Unlike other photo booths where you get printed copies at the end of the night for you and your guests, TapSnap allows your guests to email themselves copies of the pictures directly from the reception. Plus, you get a SmugMug account, and a flash drive of all the photos. So—my guests can show up, eat, get awesome pictures in front of the castle (since most of them won't have been able to attend to actual ceremony), have cake, and it'll be done.

The FINAL thing that I have for the Utah reception….I probably shouldn't have splurged on it, but I wanted it because I think pictures are really important. We have a friend here that does wedding photography (www.opiefoto.com). We actually wanted her to do our wedding photos in Florida over the Roots, but she no longer does out of state weddings. So, we were able to book her for our January 10, 2015 reception, plus she'll do some bridals for us. If you take a look at her stuff…I think it's pretty easy to see why I still wanted photos from her. It's not the wedding, sadly…but I think even our reception should be captured here. Our cake here will be cooler than the Disney cake (because we can get more for less here in Utah)…and I just want some really, really awesome pictures of it and our reception.

So, that's it for now. Congratulations to everyone who managed to get through it!

Tiffiny

 

[October 2014 Bride]

Hey Tiffiny I was only wondering the other day if you were ok as you hadn't been on here in a while. Sorry to hear you have been stressed. I hope you are doing much better now.

Your plans really sound like they are coming along well. I love that you are planning a surprise for your future husband and I loved those Disney crispy cakes on the dream boards.

I like all the plans you have for your at home reception. It will be lovely to have all those Disney touches. Photo booths are always good fun as well. So weird and amazing that your caterer used to babysit you.

Vicky

 

[edeneye]

Just caught up, really enjoyed reading every word of your posts so far! Can absolutely see where you're coming from on so many points but I think if I itemised them all we'd have another novel on our hands. For a short version, we've been doing things super early too (our site visit was at 19 months due to our proximity, or profound lack thereof) so we have run into a lot of the same issues that you've been through, as you probably know! Oh & family drama. Oh my God, family drama. Basically the subtitle of most weddings I'm finding out. Certainly ours too.

I think the greenscreen photobooth idea is absolute genius. Such a great idea to help bring a little bit of Disney back to share with all of your home reception guests. Early on, you weren't sure what wisdom you'd be able to impart but I can say for certain that I never would've thought of that.

The Rice Krispie Groom's cake is a great, thoughtful surprise too. I'm the same way about attention so I know that sort of gesture is ideal and will be appreciated. I only worry that if it's not on your BEO that it's going to require a lot of followup because as I understand it the BEO is the Bible for basically everyone involved and as you would've also heard on the Disney Wedding Podcast, communication breakdowns happen! So many different departments get involved and the left hand doesn't know what the right is doing and occasionally can't confirm whether there is a right hand at all. I'm sure it'll be fine though, your planner will be all over that.

I'm glad you're happy with your planner so far (to answer your question, we have a different planner/assistant), I know that if a 'planner' type personality gets paired with someone less enthusiastic and not especially communicative or timely that you're gonna have a bad time. Our travel agent is also learning this at the moment.

Anyways I better leave it at that for now, really enjoying your journal and can't wait to follow along right up to and beyond the big day!