This is unacceptable

[kimblebee]

My kids play sports with the local community club.
How can they not know who the guy in teal shorts is? The coach must have a roster with player's names and info including parents and their contact information.

Maybe he IS the coach

 

[lovin'fl]

My DDs played competitive travel ball and we've seen some things. Some ill behavior. Never as bad as this. So sad. But some parents get so tied up in their kids successes.

 

[lovin'fl]

My kids play sports with the local community club.
How can they not know who the guy in teal shorts is? The coach must have a roster with player's names and info including parents and their contact information.

Could be a relative or family friend. There were lots of extras coming out to my DDs' games. People on the team that guy was with aren't talking. But the other parents likely know who he is or, at least, who he was with.

 

[monsterkitty]

Here's the interview with the 13-year-old umpire https://www.9news.com/article/news/...-game/73-25981be6-40ef-49e9-b965-2b7a147450c6

 

[Timhags]

If that’s the case then the other adults should have asked/told him to stop.

I wonder if the parents enjoy wobbly pops or the devils lettuce during the games? That could contribute to this.
[/QUOTE

Devil's lettuce ( awesome new term to me) would not cause this

 

[tarheelmjfan]

I have a few thoughts on this:

Anyone who is surprised by this has probably never had a child play high level competitive sports. It doesn't normally result in a brawl, but an aggressive cursing exchange where people are held back isn't all that unusual.

I grew playing sports. My child, nieces, nephews, great-nieces & great-nephews all played or play sports. It has always been competitive, but our parents were much more laid back in my generation than they have been for the past two generations. The only time I saw a parent get aggressive in all my years of playing sports was when a coach sent his team out to hurt one of the players. That parent was justified in his actions. It doesn't take nearly as much to send parents over the edge now. They can go crazy, when a call doesn't go their way.

As an adult, I was a referee in kindergarten through high school basketball. I don't think anyone has brought this up, but I don't think children should be reffing or umping games. That child should never have been put in that position. An adult could have shut this down, before it got so bad. I've reffed games where cops had to walk us to our car, because the parents didn't agree with our calls or how we handled the game. That didn't mean we wouldn't have kicked them out or told them to shut up quickly. IMO, it's irresponsible to put children in that position. The only reason they would do that is because they didn't want to pay adults, which is inexcusable. I absolutely do not agree with the behavior, but I'm not the least bit surprised this happened. A child has no chance of controlling the situation & shouldn't be put in that position, because the league was cheaping out on officiating.

 

[kimblebee]

I 100% agree with you. I just felt like being an old timer using those terms LOL

If that was the case, they’d all be at the snack bar.


@Timhags Im quoting you here, not sure why it didn’t show up.

 

[soccerdad72]

As an adult, I was a referee in kindergarten through high school basketball. I don't think anyone has brought this up, but I don't think children should be reffing or umping games. That child should never have been put in that position. An adult could have shut this down, before it got so bad. I've reffed games where cops had to walk us to our car, because the parents didn't agree with our calls or how we handled the game. That didn't mean we wouldn't have kicked them out or told them to shut up quickly. IMO, it's irresponsible to put children in that position. The only reason they would do that is because they didn't want to pay adults, which is inexcusable. I absolutely do not agree with the behavior, but I'm not the least bit surprised this happened. A child has no chance of controlling the situation & shouldn't be put in that position, because the league was cheaping out on officiating.

7 year old baseball should be able to be umpired by a 13-year old.

I know all towns are different with sports, but our rec baseball program's 7-year old league basically requires not much more than someone in the middle of the diamond saying 'safe' or 'out'. Once they get to an older age, they use certified umpires.

My older son has refereed youth soccer for many years - unfortunately, he's seen his share of ugliness, but has always done a good job of keeping his head and diffusing situations the best he could.

 

[CdnCarrie]

I have a few thoughts on this:

Anyone who is surprised by this has probably never had a child play high level competitive sports.

They were 7 year old kids playing community ball.

 

[DisFan22]

I’d be mortified. This crap will follow them around forever.

Does anyone still have sense these days?

 

[Chocolate Cake]

Disgusting. But our local baseball association is no better. It attracts awful people with good kids.

And don't get me started on the constant fundraising. The minute you ask where the money is going, you are an outcast. Our association did not release any data. It was all a secret. So $100 to join. Then you had to work the stand (and I was in shock at how much money that stand brought in). Then work days to keep the field up and running. Then various fundraisers, including your child standing outside of WalMart with a can, begging for money (Refuse to allow your child to beg? Then your child sits on the bench.)

They never, ever said how much money was raised, or where it went to.

 

[tazdev3225]

Having been a player when I was young, my kids all played sports and my grandkids have all been on teams I have seen the downward spiral.

When I was young most parents didn't really attend games unless they were needed to drive. My mom didn't even attend my high school games and we lived 3 short blocks from my high school.

My son quit playing when he was about 12 or 13 when an opposing team's coach told his pitcher to aim a fastball at my son's head - literally. Thankfully the umpire was an older gentleman and the coach was tossed and sanctioned by the league but the damage was done. My son couldn't understand why an ADULT wanted him hurt like that. The fun was gone and he refused to play again.

Several years ago the league my grandson played in shut down for 2 weeks because of the behavior of adults at games. The previous year a parent grabbed a baseball bat and went after another parent on the opposing team after the game. I also heard a gun may have been involved but I never knew that for sure. His reasoning, the other team were sore losers because they lost the championship game. The year after that incident the league was shut down because parents were screaming obscenities at the other team and the umpire and it started to get physical. Sadly both of these incidents involved the organization my grandson played for. We were fined and the coaches were suspended for 1 year. Things did get a little better after that.

My final year coaching I was treated with disrespect before every game. The opposing coaches thought I was going to be like the other coach from my organization who was all sorts of not DIS friendly names. I didn't win one game that season but I had the respect of my team and my parents because we lost with dignity and our heads held high. Not easy to do when you have a team that had no pitching and you were losing by 10 runs in the 2nd inning every game. I actually had a parent curse out her daughter and then me because we were so bad, I gave up what I loved because I couldn't handle the stress any longer.

I get that you can be excited or upset at games but these are children who learn by our example. Not very good role models or sportsmanship here.

 

[mikehn]

I have a 14 yo playing flag football. Im the coolest dad out there. Nothing fazes me, except when Im stuck behind some knucklehead in the far left lane of the freeway.

 

[SteveH]

Should be posted on every youth sports field. Umps & Ref need support, and foul mouthed yelling parents need to be yellow cards then banned. Get it under control or get out.

 

[lifesavacation]

I wonder if these parents were generally angry, dysfunctional people or if they just snapped in the moment. It’s bizarre that anyone would behave like this, but honestly it’s not uncommon. Parents lose their minds with youth sports.

Dd has the sweetest friend and I like her parents outside of sports. However, the dad goes nuts at her volleyball games. We can’t be around him. She’s on a different team and when we play them he’s truly obnoxious and turns into a different person. And yet he’s a normal, functional adult with a good job. I don’t get it.

 

[SteveH]

There's a reason why there's a shortage of umpires and referees in sports these days.

This is becoming a huge problem. Those that are still doing it are getting older and older, there is a lack of a young wave of officials and some studies into it says it's because of the behavior of adults like this jerk.

...Anyone who is surprised by this has probably never had a child play high level competitive sports. It doesn't normally result in a brawl, but an aggressive cursing exchange where people are held back isn't all that unusual...

...I don't think anyone has brought this up, but I don't think children should be reffing or umping games. That child should never have been put in that position.

The problem starts when the cursing parents are not booted on the spot and/or banned for the season. Youth sports programs need to stay on top of the little things or they will get completely out of hand.

As for the 13 year old ref, I agree and disagree. I think it can be very beneficial for the participants to see an official of that age, and I think it can really help that young person grow, mature and see their sport (that the probably love) from another view. It usually makes them a better player. With that said there should have been an adult supervising and ready to deal with the adult jerks. That was unfair to expect the 13 year old to deal with an adult. That 13 year old is probably the only one willing to volunteer in the first place, because some of these types of parents have driven away officials and the programs that don't ban foul mouthed adults and let it happen too.

 

[PollyannaMom]

I will never understand why adults get so invested in youth sports. They are young kids and it is just a game. Even at DD's ymca soccer games when she was 4 there were parents who got kind of ugly. Like do you really think this season of youth ball is going to make or break your kid's sports career?

I don't think it's in any way excusable, but my personal theory is that adults get so invested in their kids' sports nowadays because it's all they've got. - So much is expected today in terms of kids doing all these activities and parents being there at everything that it's replaced the adults' own hobbies and social lives.

 

[barkley]

Having been a player when I was young, my kids all played sports and my grandkids have all been on teams I have seen the downward spiral.

When I was young most parents didn't really attend games unless they were needed to drive. My mom didn't even attend my high school games and we lived 3 short blocks from my high school.

My son quit playing when he was about 12 or 13 when an opposing team's coach told his pitcher to aim a fastball at my son's head - literally. Thankfully the umpire was an older gentleman and the coach was tossed and sanctioned by the league but the damage was done. My son couldn't understand why an ADULT wanted him hurt like that. The fun was gone and he refused to play again.

Several years ago the league my grandson played in shut down for 2 weeks because of the behavior of adults at games. The previous year a parent grabbed a baseball bat and went after another parent on the opposing team after the game. I also heard a gun may have been involved but I never knew that for sure. His reasoning, the other team were sore losers because they lost the championship game. The year after that incident the league was shut down because parents were screaming obscenities at the other team and the umpire and it started to get physical. Sadly both of these incidents involved the organization my grandson played for. We were fined and the coaches were suspended for 1 year. Things did get a little better after that.

My final year coaching I was treated with disrespect before every game. The opposing coaches thought I was going to be like the other coach from my organization who was all sorts of not DIS friendly names. I didn't win one game that season but I had the respect of my team and my parents because we lost with dignity and our heads held high. Not easy to do when you have a team that had no pitching and you were losing by 10 runs in the 2nd inning every game. I actually had a parent curse out her daughter and then me because we were so bad, I gave up what I loved because I couldn't handle the stress any longer.

I get that you can be excited or upset at games but these are children who learn by our example. Not very good role models or sportsmanship here.

your post describes what confuses me about the mindset many parents i've encountered have regarding the absolute necessity for kids to do sports being based on it providing them with essential skills they will need as adults in the workforce. i've encountered parents who believe with their heart and soul that anyone who doesn't force their kids to do team sports is committing some kind of child abuse and failing in their job as a parent.

i just have never understood it. i get the idea of 'team' but when the team experience is surrounded with a win at all costs-including injuring others mindset how is that beneficial? exposing kids to 'adults' whose language/behaviors in a social setting are SO inappropriate/in some cases illegal doesn't seem to be providing the kids with skills they should be emulating.

just as kid's team sports have spiraled out of control so have behaviors in the workplace. i have to wonder if there is a correlation. has it become more acceptable/the norm to engage in inappropriate/dangerous interactions for those who witnessed/lived it weekends on end for years of their young lives? disclaimer-i'm not saying this is limited to younger workers, i encountered horrible behaviors from all ages in the workforce but some of the most bullying/win at all costs-damn the damage it causes attitudes were from those who proudly shared that they had spent their youths/college years in highly charged sport environments.

 

[SteveH]

I don't think it's in any way excusable, but my personal theory is that adults get so invested in their kids' sports nowadays because it's all they've got. - So much is expected today in terms of kids doing all these activities and parents being there at everything that it's replaced the adults' own hobbies and social lives.

Sports were never our kids thing, music was. Marching Band was a HUGE deal as well as Drum Corps. We were heavily involved and helped out on trips, food, you name it (mostly my wife to be honest) but we still had our lives, but we sure had a lot more time when all of that ended. Thankfully band kids just want to have fun, sure there is competition on the field but everyone cheers for the effort. That is often lacking in competitive youth sports.

 

[CdnCarrie]

Non profit community clubs are run very differently here. Five years of ball and no fundraising, begging or stands. Assuming stands is a canteen. Nothing like that here with my kid's baseball. I think hockey may be different.

Disgusting. But our local baseball association is no better. It attracts awful people with good kids.

And don't get me started on the constant fundraising. The minute you ask where the money is going, you are an outcast. Our association did not release any data. It was all a secret. So $100 to join. Then you had to work the stand (and I was in shock at how much money that stand brought in). Then work days to keep the field up and running. Then various fundraisers, including your child standing outside of WalMart with a can, begging for money (Refuse to allow your child to beg? Then your child sits on the bench.)

They never, ever said how much money was raised, or where it went to.