Where do you draw the line between living now and saving for a future that may never happen?

[Gumbo4x4]

I guess one other thing to ask is what you would normally spend on vacation?

If you normally vacation for $2,000, this is a really big increase. If you normally spend $8,000 on vacation, still a big increase - BUT, you're really looking at a $4,000 "increase" as opposed to a $12,000 one.

So, without this piece of the puzzle, it's hard to say exactly how to advise. But, my gut instinct is still to do a cheaper trip in place of the ABD.

 

[mjkacmom]

OP I have lived both sides of the situation so I am also voting for finding a balance between both vacationing and saving. I lost my mom when she was only in her 50's and I was in my 20's. It was a shock for my whole family. For years now though we have also been caring for my dad who has vascular dementia and I am watching him go through 40+ years of savings because we need aides to help us. (We all still cover shifts every week).

He never in a million years expected to be in his 80's and needing help with bathing, dressing, etc. It's sad but also expensive and none of it is covered my Medicare so I have learned quickly that financially retirement with cognitive impairment is very different than one without it.

In the midst of that DH and I have two children in college and even though we saved it is another staggering expense.

We never vacationed when I was growing up and DH and I were both committed to going on them with our children but helping them get through school with limited debt was also important to us.

We have taken great trips and have wonderful memories. With the help of this board and other sites I have managed to get some great deals, rent some gorgeous time shares for a week and find ways to strike a reasonable balance without feeling like we compromised on anything.

Genetics is only part of the equation with our health and lifestyle and healthy habits also count for a lot so better not to make any assumptions.

Best of luck and I hope you and your family find that perfect balance for you.

We lost my mom last year, it was sudden. My father has Alzheimer's, and with the help of an attorney, made financial decisions based on the assumption of him eventually needing a nursing home, and protecting some assets so that she could live comfortably for decades. However, it's scary how quickly funds get depleted when someone needs a paid caregiver. I also have two in college, three more to go. Expensive trips aren't necessarily more fun than cheaper ones.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

Expensive trips aren't necessarily more fun than cheaper ones.

I know if Eliza were around, she'd disagree, but I don't. I'd rather go on the cheap than not go at all

 

[piccolopat]

It sounds like you are already taking care of things for retirement planning and so I am answering this as if this is just extra money for you. Your kids will not remember that you spent $12K for one trip to Wyoming, only that you went and had a great time. Why not use the ABD itinerary as a guide and do a trip on your own for half the cost. Then use the other half for a different trip. Two memories for the price of one!

Back to your original point. I agree with other posters who said you never know how long you will live. Many times what we think is genetics is really more lifestyle. Focus on getting and staying healthy and you may have many more trips in your future. I would rather plan that way than spend all of my money early and run out of funds for later adventures.

 

[bellebud]

I have saved 20% of what I make since I got my first real job out of college. I also started saving for college for both kids when my second was born and if they go to a Georgia college between what I have saved and what the HOPE scholarship pays, we should be good there.

We have taken some expensive trips in the past(Europe(family trip) for 19 days last year, Europe(school trip) for 15 days this year) so this one for $12000 is not out of the normal, but to really make the $12000 seem more insane, we are actually looking at the 4 night Wyoming in winter trip. There is no pricing there yet but I am guessing around $3000, maybe $3500 a person, plus airfare so it will really be more than $12000. We should probably research how to do much of the same trip on our own.

I can afford it, I just wonder if it is worth it? Like others have said, $12000 is 3 or 4 vacations now or it is $25,000 in 25 years assuming 3% growth.

I need a crystal ball.

Your question is "is it worth it?" And most of us have answered NO. This is specifically for $12,000 for Wyoming. What is so special about the trip that makes it worth $12,000. Maybe answering that will help you decide.

Believe me, I spend $$$$ on vacations now that we can afford to. However, it's after everything else has been paid and saved for. Also, each trip is different. What is it about this Wyoming trip that has you contemplating spending $12,000? Maybe there's something about it that's worth it to you.

I spent $15,000 on a weeks cruise out of NY a few years ago. We took my mom and stepdad (me, dh, ds and dd). We all stayed together in the Garden Villa on the Norwegian Gem. This is a 3 bedroom, 5000+ square foot stateroom with a butler. Literally to-die-for accommodations and service. This stateroom usually starts at $30,000 per week. Oprah and other celebrities stay in it. This was a 70th bday gift for my mom. I've never regretted spending that money. The pampering that mom and stepdad received (and us, but we don't care about that, lol), the enjoyment of staying together, being out on the ocean, the dolphin experience we did together... totally worth $15,000.

I also spent about $20,000 on an Alaskan Cruise (huge back of the ship suite, first class airfare from NY, etc). Again, the 'specialness' of this trip outweighed the cost for me.

But our other trips are not that costly, unless there's a reason for it to be. When dd and I go to Disney, I'm not spending that kind of money. If I did an ABD trip, I know it's crazy money, and I'd make it "worth it" to me by doing a European one, not an American one.

So the question you should ask yourself is if there's something so special about this trip for you.

 

[AnnaFloridaLover]

There is absolutely no way that $12,000 for a family of four is of value. First of all, its Wyoming. Look at the ABD itinerary and copycat it for probably a quarter of the price. People are drinking the Disney kool aid if they think they are getting a good deal or value for any of their ABD trips, quite frankly. If you have money to burn, by all means spend it any way you choose.

For 12,000 you can take your family on a Mediterranean cruise for 10 days, including airfare, hotels before and after cruise and spending money. That would get you 2 cabins.

For $10,000 you can take your family to Hawaii for 3 weeks, airfare, luaus, sailing, whale watching, zip lining and spending money included.

For $10,000 you can take your family of 4 to China for 13 days, with China Focus Tours, airfare from the US, all in country flights, 2 hotel rooms (beautiful, mostly suites with glass rain showers, all food, all attractions, 2 well educated guides in every city, luggage service to and from your hotel room and motor coach INCLUDED. ABD offers a similar itinerary for 4 X the price, staying in higher end hotels, airfare NOT included.

Also, I'd like someone to name one place that Disney can get you into that many other tour guides or operators can't. Other than somewhere on Disney property. Any guide worth his salt can get you into an after hours "private" tour of the Vatican.

 

[mnrose]

There is absolutely no way that $12,000 for a family of four is of value. First of all, its Wyoming. Look at the ABD itinerary and copycat it for probably a quarter of the price. People are drinking the Disney kool aid if they think they are getting a good deal or value for any of their ABD trips, quite frankly. If you have money to burn, by all means spend it any way you choose.

For 12,000 you can take your family on a Mediterranean cruise for 10 days, including airfare, hotels before and after cruise and spending money. That would get you 2 cabins.

For $10,000 you can take your family to Hawaii for 3 weeks, airfare, luaus, sailing, whale watching, zip lining and spending money included.

For $10,000 you can take your family of 4 to China for 13 days, with China Focus Tours, airfare from the US, all in country flights, 2 hotel rooms (beautiful, mostly suites with glass rain showers, all food, all attractions, 2 well educated guides in every city, luggage service to and from your hotel room and motor coach INCLUDED. ABD offers a similar itinerary for 4 X the price, staying in higher end hotels, airfare NOT included.

Also, I'd like someone to name one place that Disney can get you into that many other tour guides or operators can't. Other than somewhere on Disney property. Any guide worth his salt can get you into an after hours "private" tour of the Vatican.

This exactly. If spending 12K is "in the budget" for a vacation, I'd sure as heck be looking at something a LOT more memorable than a 6 days in Wyoming. Also, bear in mind that the 12K (to ABD) does NOT include getting there, and does NOT include quite a number of meals. Now, if could be the OP is talking about a trip for just two people (at roughly 8500 to ABD, and factoring in airfare, etc to get to the 12K number), but in my mind that just makes it even more ridiculous as a cost.

I am NOT averse to spending money on vacations. We do it all the time, but (a) I can completely afford it without worrying about retirement or my kids' college education, and (b) if I spend that kind of money, it's going to be extremely memorable and lots less per person per week than 4000+. I could easily stay a month in Hawaii (renting a condo) for 2 people for that kind of money....and fly first class to boot.

 

[Pacolovestacos]

Not when they're making money on top of your money.

Well the stock market has gone straight up since 2009. So let me ask this: did your advisors make you money from 2007-end of 2008? Because a blind monkey could have made money since Summer 2009.

 

[Pacolovestacos]

Says the person who spends every penny as soon as they make it

I'm also the person who has his own business and gets to travel for 3 months out of the year.

 

[FairestOfThemAll37]

Your particular vacation would not be my cup of tea, so spending $12k on that type of vacation makes me shake my head. I hate group tours and that part of the country holds little interest for me.

That said, if it's in your budget and you find the ABD experience worth it then go for it! I love nice hotels. Lots of people think it's crazy to spend $1k on a hotel room where you only "shower and sleep" but I find value in it.

I'm going on a cruise and then paying double the cruise fare to have 10 days of private excursions/private drivers. Some people think this is batty when you can go with the regular cruise excursions for pennies on the dollar.

It's very hard for other people to determine the worth of an experience for you. Others will always be looking at it through their own lens, which may be completely different than your own.

It seems the title confuses the issue a little bit. You mentioned that you've saved plenty and $12k isn't out of the norm for you. Is it really an issue of saving for tomorrow or spending that much on this particular trip? Those are different things entirely IMO.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

This exactly. If spending 12K is "in the budget" for a vacation, I'd sure as heck be looking at something a LOT more memorable than a 6 days in Wyoming.

See, this I think is a little unfair as now we're getting into personal preference. I'd personally much rather go to Yellowstone than Hawaii or the Mediterranean or really most places on Earth.

BUT, I don't need to spend $12k to do it.

 

[mnrose]

See, this I think is a little unfair as now we're getting into personal preference. I'd personally much rather go to Yellowstone than Hawaii or the Mediterranean or really most places on Earth.

BUT, I don't need to spend $12k to do it.

True. I've done "the west" vacations and I've enjoyed them tremendously. I just never spent anywhere close to 12K for it. I've had extremely lovely vacations for my family of four in that area and spent less than $3000, all in. 12K, to me, is a HUGE amount, and it's gonna be a very splashy vacation....not a week in the US because it simply isn't necessary to spend that much to have an excellent vacation. And, if OP is asking the question, there is obviously some doubt in her mind as to whether that amount is in her budget. She can do it for much less and relieve the budget pressure without sacrificing very much in terms of quality.

 

[DaisyJ]

Well the stock market has gone straight up since 2009. So let me ask this: did your advisors make you money from 2007-end of 2008? Because a blind monkey could have made money since Summer 2009.

No, because we didn't have a financial advisor until a few years ago.

 

[AnnaFloridaLover]

I have saved 20% of what I make since I got my first real job out of college. I also started saving for college for both kids when my second was born and if they go to a Georgia college between what I have saved and what the HOPE scholarship pays, we should be good there.

We have taken some expensive trips in the past(Europe(family trip) for 19 days last year, Europe(school trip) for 15 days this year) so this one for $12000 is not out of the normal, but to really make the $12000 seem more insane, we are actually looking at the 4 night Wyoming in winter trip. There is no pricing there yet but I am guessing around $3000, maybe $3500 a person, plus airfare so it will really be more than $12000. We should probably research how to do much of the same trip on our own.

I can afford it, I just wonder if it is worth it? Like others have said, $12000 is 3 or 4 vacations now or it is $25,000 in 25 years assuming 3% growth.

I need a crystal ball.

OK $12,000 for a trip for 3 (or 4?) people to Wyoming in the winter for 4 nights is really insane in my opinion. Yes, do it on your own. Don't flush money down the toilet. No crystal ball needed.

Also, you can eat healthy, exercise and plan to live a long life, despite your genetics. God knows, I come from a hell of a crappy gene pool, including my own early cancer, however if I die early, at least I tried my best, no regrets.

 

[PollyannaMom]

Expensive trips aren't necessarily more fun than cheaper ones.

I love that line! - Vacations have always been important to us. Even years when a Disney trip wasn't in the budget, we made sure to do smaller, local things. It's the memories of being together, out of your normal routine, that count in my book.

For "drawing the line," I think it's all about balance. We have examples for both sides of the debate in our family: DH's parents are savers, currently enjoying a comfortable retirement, and we have learned a lot from them about being sensible with money in everyday life. But my mom died unexpectedly in her 50s, and never got to do many of the things she'd hoped, so we are also very conscious of doing what's truly important to us now, before it's too late.

As to the specific trip in question, I don't see Wyoming as "worth it" at that price, but there are other trips I would spend that much on, so it's really just personal preference. Picture yourself twenty years from now, and a young person asks you about your regrets. If you're shaking your head saying "Gosh, I wish I hadn't let people talk me out of that trip!" - then go for it.

 

[AnnaFloridaLover]

See, this I think is a little unfair as now we're getting into personal preference. I'd personally much rather go to Yellowstone than Hawaii or the Mediterranean or really most places on Earth.

BUT, I don't need to spend $12k to do it.

I've done Yellowstone with 6 people for a fraction of $12,000.

On another trip, we rented a van for $300 at Phoenix airport, stayed in Scottsdale for 4 nights, Sedona for 1 night, Tusayan, outside of Grand Canyon entrance for 2 nights, 1 night between there and Santa Monica at a hotel, Santa Monica for 4 nights, Las Vegas for 2 nights (dropping off van at airport). 2 rooms at every location, flight, food, hotel, attractions, airfare, 1 American Girl doll (LOL) cost total: $5,000.

 

[Nancyg56]

We have always traveled often, just not expensively when we didn't have the money.

Since you're questioning it, I think you should do the Wyoming trip, but not with Disney. If you really had the $12,000 to spare, you wouldn't be questioning it.

I wonder if this is accurate. I tend to question some of our spending in regards to vacations. I know we have the money, but.... I can tell you my DH, who is the best money manager I know, will tell himself we cannot afford an expensive vacation...and then hand me the money to pay for it, have money set aside to buy all of the girls new clothes, pay for massages for the girls....we have it, he just hates to part with it.... but adds on along the way.
I don't mind because the reason we have the money is because our expenditures are well thought out, and I imagine internally, for him, they can be stressful.


OP- in terms of "worth", this one would not be worth it to me. I cannot tell you if this is the BIG trip for you, but we all have one that makes no sense to anyone else but ourselves. Is this one yours? If so., go for it. If this is not the "dream trip" and it is causing you stress, I would look to determine if there are less expensive options to get the same experiences.

 

[Nancyg56]

The people in my DH family are not long lived, and he has had a few health issues. He would tell me that he needed to work, but that the rest of the family should go. I finally told him to work if he wanted, but that he could take one thing to the bank.....he could save all that money, but if he kicked the bucket on me without having enjoyed our family, I was going spend every penny on things that would make him want to haunt me. Spend some money on himself now or know I would do it for him if he departed this life before me, and I would do so on things that would make his blood curdle. Either way.....it was getting spent. Well, after his blood pressure came back down to a safer zone...we planned a trip.

The poor guy is still not the guy who gives himself permission to have a lot of fun, but is much better. It has been years since he vacationed with us, so my new plan is that I told him I refuse to go again without him if he misses one more. We will see how that one works! He does have a lot of fun once he lets himself go!

 

[longboard55]

we have always had fun in our lives, but we spend what we can afford. When we were in our 20s that meant tent camping, now its the yacht club. I have an old IRA that I started in around 1986 and have not put any money in it for years, but you would not believe what its value is now.

 

[Pacolovestacos]

No, because we didn't have a financial advisor until a few years ago.

Fair enough but I'm sure you get the point. Get back to me during the next recession. I'll be curious to see how your advisor performed.